A/N: Advanced warning, tomorrow the rating of this fic goes up to M!

Chapter 10

Jake's face looked like thunder as he emptied the rest of the food into a bin bag.

"I said I was sorry," he mumbled as he watched Marci downing her wine to take away the taste.

"What make you use coffeemate in the gravy?" she cried, literally scraping at her tongue with the napkin.

"I thought it was chicken gravy granules!" Jake told her for the fourteenth time, "I was distracted by dead royalty!"

"Aw, babe," Shaz tried to keep a straight face as she watched him tipping a bowl of hard, cold peas in the bag, "Never mind, you tried and that's what matters."

"My churning stomach is what matters!" Marci dramatically clutched her middle and kept one eye on Jake to see if he was buying it, "I will never eat again."

"Yeah yeah," Jake rolled his eyes, wise to the wind-up.

"Next time you want to impress Chief Inspector Thomas why don't you try training up a dog?" Shaz asked as innocently as she could.

"It's all very well you two picking holes in my cookery skills but I didn't see you doing any better!" he pointed out.

"Oh I don't know," Shaz spoke up cheekily, "I really liked the shape of the potatoes."

"Oh yeah," Marci added, "the shape and the lack of peel on the potatoes were two of my favourite things about the meal."

"We could win the turner prize for that," Shaz concluded, desperately trying not to burst into giggles as Jake's annoyance finally gave way to an embarrassed but amused smile.

"You've both made your point," he said as he emptied the last of the food into the bag and tied the top, "from now on if I'm going to cook it'll be straight out of a packet."

"You could ask Chief Inspector Thomas for cookery lessons," Shaz suggested.

"While you're at it you might want to ask for lessons in something more pleasurable too," Marci raised an eyebrow, sending Jake's cheeks an interesting shade of fuchsia.

"Like what gas mark to cook a Marci on?" he asked, sending a glare in her direction. He sighed as he scrambled for his wallet. "Right, well the roast is off I suppose. Who's for oven chips?"

"Sounds good to me," said Marci.

"I thought you'd never ask," Shaz grinned.

Jake checked his freezer and sighed.

"Not enough left," he said, "I'll nip out and pick some up." He slipped on his shoes and jacket. "Anyone else want anything before the shop closes?"

"More of this," Marci held up the almost-empty wine bottle.

"Oh yes please," said Shaz.

"And something for an upset stomach," Marci added cheekily as Jake swatted her around the head with a newspaper, "Ow."

"How about something for an upset best friend who will never cook again?" he asked, raising one eyebrow. He picked up the bin bag and left his flat in search of something easier for their now belated lunch as Marci poured what was left of the wine into her glass and Shaz's. She lifted the glass and gave Shaz a smile. "Thanks, Shazza."

"What for?" Shaz frowned.

"Coming over," Marci sighed deeply. "I would have spent the day on tears without you here."

Shaz smiled a little shyly.

"What are friends for?" she said, almost choking over the words. Her face felt a little flushed but she chose to ignore it. She could always blame it on the wine. As though to give her cheeks an alibi she lifted her glass and took a couple of sips. "I'm glad I could distract you for a while."

Marci nodded.

"It was tempting to sit and watch the news all day," she said quietly, "but really, it wouldn't have been good for me." she sighed as she tried to convince the last two drops of wine to fall from the bottle into her glass. "There's nothing else they can say for now. We know she's dead. We know about the paparazzi on the motorbikes. We know Prince Charles is flying over. That's it. That's all they've got. I can't watch the same news and the same shots of people," she found herself getting teary again, "of people laying flowers… over and over, all afternoon." She sniffed defiantly. She was not going to cry again. "The day is sad enough, and it's making me feel sad about losing Eddie again. I don't want to go back to that stage." She stared into the red liquid and saw her distorted reflection staring back. "I want to remember the good times right now."

"Well I'll drink to that," Shaz smiled, "good to get to that stage, Marci."

Marci nodded.

"How long did it take you to get there?" she asked quietly and Shaz took another sip of wine. She gulped it down hard.

"A long time," she said, sadness slipping through her smile.

"I know it was different for you though," Marci said, "she was the love of your life. I didn't know Eddie as well as I should have done." She paused, "or as well as I wanted to." She looked at Shaz who seemed quiet suddenly. Shit, had she depressed her? She cleared her throat. "You've turned a corner now. That's the main thing."

Shaz nodded, her cheeks burning again.

"I have," she agreed.

Marci looked at her curiously.

"You seem to be blushing, Sharon Granger," she said as Shaz turned her head a little, "do I detect a little spark of interest in another person looming on the horizon?"

"Don't you think you'd be the first one to know if there was?" Shaz asked uncomfortably and Marci raised her eyebrow, a sudden smile appearing on her face.

"I knew it!" she beamed, "I knew there was someone! You've been making an effort for someone lately, the make-up and the perfume, and getting your hair done." She noticed Shaz involuntarily patted the bottom of the sleek bob she'd adopted just a week or so earlier. "So spill it, Granger. Who is it?"

"There's no one," Shaz squirmed as she stared into her glass.

"Don't give me that," Marci began to squeal excitedly, "I can see it all over your face! So who is it? Have you been on a date yet? Have you snuck a snog round the back, in the car park?"

"No, no, nothing like that!" Shaz cried quickly.

"But there is someone you like though?" Try as she might, Shaz couldn't block her growing smile. "Who?" when she didn't reply Marci began to fish for clues. "Boy or girl?"

"We're not five!"

"Alright then, man or woman?"

Shaz hesitated. He lifted her glass and hid behind it momentarily, then sipped some more wine. She bit her lip for a second before finally she admitted quietly,

"Woman."

"Alright," Marci shuffled to the edge of her seat, "now were getting somewhere." She paused "So is it someone from the club?"

Shaz bit her lip. Technically, yes.

"Sort of."

"Someone you work with?" Marci recognised Shaz's burning cheeks and silence as confirmation and her excitement grew. "Someone in the canine division?"

"No," said Marci.

"But they're in uniform?" silence greeted her. "They're in CID?" Marci grew more excited as she narrowed down the field, "someone in CID… it's not the Ma'am, is it?"

"No," Shaz frowned.

"Is it that detective constable who works with her? The part-timer?"

"No," Shaz said quietly.

Marci frowned as she racked her brains.

"And it's a woman you say?" Shaz's silence confirmed it. "Shazza, I must be losing my marbles because I can't think of anyone else in CID except DCI Drake, that constable… Lorna, and –" she froze as she watched Shaz hanging her head, suddenly deadly serious. Marci felt a tingle spread across her skin as she realised what Shaz wasn't saying. "And… and me?" her voice went up in a question as Shaz hung her head a little harder. Marci's eyes opened wider in disbelief as she felt her lips twitch into a smile. "You like me?" her heart beat a little faster as she began to feel her own cheeks warming and a smile breaking out across her face. "Why didn't you just tell me?"

Shaz tried to pull her hair across her face to hide behind it but since she'd had her hair cut there wasn't enough left for that.

"It's not that easy just to say it," she said.

"I would!"

"I'm not as confident as you are!" Shaz fanned her face a little as her bush grew hotter, "Marci, look, I'm sorry, forget I said anything –"

"You didn't say anything," Marci grinned, "I had to do all the talking." She pulled Shaz's hands away from her hair and face. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I just told you why!"

"You could have told me," Marci felt a warmth in her chest as her heart beat a little harder, "you should have told me," she grinned. "Shaz, look at me." Reluctantly Shaz turned her eyes in her direction and found only a smile heading back in her direction. "Do I look like I'm going to emigrate to Australia in horror?" She noticed that Shaz still didn't seem to know what to say so she reached out toward her and laid her fingers against her cheek. "You silly thing."

"You just lost Eddie," Shaz reminded her, "it didn't seem right."

Marci bit the side of her lip and tried to suppress a grin.

"Does it feel right now?" she asked gently.

Shaz swallowed, unsure of herself.

"Maybe," she said quietly.

"Do you want to see?" Marci asked her, one eyebrow rising. She had never seen Shaz look so nervous or unsure before and laid her fingers softly over hers to reassure her. As though that was a signal Shaz began to let her inhibitions slide. She closed her eyes as Marci did the same and forward they both leaned until their lips brushed together. There was a rush of heat through Marci's body as she felt the kiss. It began in her chest and spread throughout her limbs. She stroked Shaz's cheek gently as she drew her closer and kissed her a little more deeply, a little harder, a little more confidently and she could feel the brunette kissing her back when suddenly she seemed to freeze. It shocked Marci so deeply that she stopped too and pulled back a little. The expression on Shaz's face couldn't have been more different now. It was scared, haunted, devastated. Marci felt her stomach turn as she whispered,

"Shaz? What's the matter?"

Shaz stared at her for a moment, her eyes wide. She swallowed nervously as she tried to work out what to say. She flinched and scrambled up from the table.

"This was a mistake," she whispered, leaving Marci to stare back in horror.

"What?" she cried.

"Marci, I'm sorry," she whispered, shaking her head as she backed toward the door, "I should never have… I mean…" She fumbled for her bag on the counter and backed out of the kitchen, "I'm really sorry, Marci."

Marci was up on her feet, desperate to stop her from running away.

"Shaz, wait!" she called as Shaz left the flat with one last cry of 'I'm sorry' as she disappeared. Although Marci followed her out into the corridor Shaz was already belting down the stairs and was not intending to be followed. "Shaz!" Marci cried, "Please, come back! What did I do wrong?"

As the sound of Shaz's footsteps faded away Marci was left alone with a tightness in her chest. She ran back inside, closed her eyes and slid down to the floor. There were tears starting. Fuck, what the hell just happened? One minute she'd just found out that Shaz liked her, the next she was running from a single kiss. Marci cursed herself over and over but couldn't work out what she had done wrong - and Shaz was in no frame of mind to tell her.

~xXx~

Out of the building, into the car park she fled. She ran to her car and unlocked the door quickly, her heart pounding and thrashing inside her. She threw herself into the driver's seat and slammed the door then folded her arms over the steering wheel and thrust her head upon them. She cried and wept as she thought about Marci's hurt expression and distressed cries but she couldn't have stayed. She just had to run.

Through her mind images and sensations played; memories of her last days with Kim, the days before a man plunged his knife into her guts. Shaz closed her eyes tightly as she gave a fitful sob. She'd really started to think that she'd started to move on. Her feelings for Marci had been growing so strong and gave her the kind of blushes she hadn't had on years and yet the moment they kissed – bam – all she could think about was Kim.

Kim.

Back again in her head, back where she had been from the moment they met.

She really liked Marci. She more than liked her. She was a beautiful, funny, intelligent woman and Shaz wanted to spend every day in her company. She made her heart skip a beat and her mouth twitch into a smile. But yet when it came down to it she still wasn't Kim.

"It isn't fair!" she cried against the steering wheel, "why can't I get over you?!"

But no one replied and there were no answers to give. Something was stopping Shaz from putting Kim in the past and until she could find out why she could never truly move on. Instead she'd left the woman she liked so much in tears of confusion and ruined the best chance she'd had at finding happiness again.

It was a day that she was never going to forget but for her own reasons. Royalty had died, but so had Shaz's heart.

~xXx~

A/N Thank you SO much to ATurkishFan for the lovely review you left me yesterday, I can thrilled that you're enjoying these stories and I really appreciate you taking the time to tell me. I hope you will stick with them!

Don't forget, tomorrow the rating goes up to M – You have been warned!