OKAY! So, sorry for the delay and everything, I've been having like, a really rough time writing this chapter, and I was gonna put more in it, but it got too long. AND I had to deal with Thanksgiving stuff AND Black Friday sales AND the Alabama Auburn football game (Go Tigers) AND now I'm also dealing with Christmas shopping and getting stuff ready, and personalizing the address labels. Plus, I seriously have like, eighty fan fictions that I'm working on and just posted a new one last night and I really have to update Spells, Counterspells, and Lightning Don't Mix now, plus I have to get out the next chapter of Cats .. So...
It's a hard knock life.
Anyway. I hope you like this chapter, it took a while to write it and everything... I noticed the overall caliber of the story has been just slightly declining, so, hopefully that picks up again. This chapter has more action in it, so who knows? Maybe you guys will really love it. So yeah. Read on.
Formal disclaimer: I do not own Marvel, Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson, Avatar - either one - Lord of the Rings, Jason Bourne, the Princess Bride, SpongeBob, Harry Potter - haven't you come to expect it by now? - or, in fact, new carpets. Also, some of this story may, as always, be credited to my sister, the fantastic PlushChrome. Which, sadly, Plushie Dearest cannot be with us for this author's note. BUT! We might see more of her later. ENJOY THE STORY!
Jo~
Tony was sick and tired of people messing up his Tower.
Loki, he had forgiven. Mostly. Because he knew the god wasn't really responsible for destroying all of his and Pepper's hard work, but the guy who was wrecking all of his stuff in an attempt to hit Clint as he hung upside down from a chandelier and fired arrows at him had no excuses for his actions. And Tony immediately disliked him.
"Hey Muscles," Tony called from under the protection of his armor. "You prepared to pay for that stuff?"
"Stark, now might not be the wisest time to provoke him," Loki pointed out from Tony's left, a flash of green magic conjuring his standard leather armor and green cape, though he wasn't wearing his Reindeer Games helmet.
On his other side, Tony saw Thor's armor also getting conjured into place, and the Thunderer looked down at himself in surprise and then grinned, his hammer flying to his hand. Belleview trained a gun on the big guy, a serious expression on his face.
The big Asgardian, who looked a bit like a more muscled Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, turned to them and barred his yellow teeth, pulling a huge, double sided axe from his shoulder. Clint shot another arrow at him, and it bounced harmlessly off of his bare shoulder.
Soooo... That wasn't at all discouraging.
"Hello," Loki said, turning his head to the side in surprise. "I believe we have met before." He turned to Thor. "Isn't he the one who defeated you in that tournament and broke your arm?"
"Yes, I believe so," Thor confirmed, glaring at the man. "And he is also the one who stole your book and pushed you down a flight of stairs."
"I believe I cursed him," Loki remarked idly.
"And I do think that I hit him," Thor said with a nod.
"Ooh," Tony said, hissing in fake sympathy and turning to the Rock. "You see, that's why you never target brothers. They all have a 'I-can-do-what-I-please-but-you-better-keep-your-hands-off-of-my-brother' thing going on. It's weird, I know."
"I am Skurge," The Rock said in a deep, gravelly voice. "The Executioner!"
"Really?" Tony asked. "You're seriously calling yourself the Executioner like some bad pro wrestler or something? That's not uncreative at all. Also, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you've probably never legally executed someone before in your life."
"Cease talking, pathetic mortal," Skurge spit, glaring at them. "I was sent here for your heads, and I will carry out my orders. Only the Asgardians and the agent may live."
"Which agent?" Clint scoffed, swinging down from his perch and taking a couple steps back in an attempt to get out of reach of Skurge's axe. "Cause there are like, three in this tower. Four if you're counting Cap."
"Mm, I'm not sure I would count Cap," Tony protested. "He's more of a consultant, as it were."
"The agent who speaks like us," Skurge said as if it should be obvious. "The one called Belleview. My mistress has need of him." He turned to Thor. "Come quietly, Prince, and perhaps I will make the death of your comrades quick."
"You dare contest the might of my shield brothers and I?" Thor said with a frown, readying Mjonir. "Any attempts to take their lives will result in your death, and the death of your mistress as well."
"How dare you threaten her!" Skurge shouted. "The only reason you are alive, you arrogant fool, is due to her need of you! You should bow at her feet and thank her for your very breath, and yet you slander her name!"
"Dude, he's in love with her," Tony said, the realization hitting him. "There's a serious love triangle going on here. Or is it more of a quadrangle with Jane in the mix? And what about Sif? Why does everyone love Thor, anyway?"
"Stark, focus," Loki said calmly.
Skurge opened his mouth and then paused, clenching his teeth.
"Anyone else suddenly feeling sorry for him?" Clint inquired without lowering his bow from where the arrow was pointing at the Asgardian's head. "Hey Mr. Macho, you do realize that she's obsessed with Thor, right?"
"Amora is precious to me," Skurge said. "And I will win her heart one day. But for the moment, I will fight for her. Now, either you come with me and your companions die honorably as warriors, or they die as useless creatures."
"Yeah, and your friends are really gonna hold back, huh?" Clint said, rolling his eyes.
"There are more?" Thor inquired worriedly.
"About five," Clint scoffed, looking more annoyed than anything else. "Nat went after them. All pretty big guys with swords, except for the one Avatar with the Morning star."
"An arrow headed air bender with an early variation of the necklace Arwen gave Aragorn?" Tony asked in a sarcastically shocked tone of voice.
"I actually thinks he means a blue giant-humanoid creature with a spiked club," Belleview corrected, having apparently not caught the sarcasm.
"A Frost Giant?" Thor demanded, his face warring between disgust and, oddly enough, guilt.
"Oh, fantastic," Loki groaned. "Just what I needed."
"ENOUGH!" Skurge shouted. "Since you refuse to see sense, you will pay the price!"
"For your lack of vision?" Tony cut in.
Skurge growled and swung his battle-axe. Tony rocketed back a bit as Thor and Belleview both jumped away to avoid the swing and Loki vanished into thin air, only to reappear next to Clint, who jumped at the unexpected transportation. Loki's mouth quirked a bit in amusement.
Belleview opened fire, his bullets ricocheting harmlessly off of Skurge's skin.
Thor threw his hammer and Skurge was knocked back with the force of it, almost running into Clint and Loki. Clint managed to pull away at the last second and took the opportunity to hit Skurge across the head with his bow, while Loki simply took a step back, looking unimpressed.
Tony fired his repulsers, and Skurge growled and tossed his axe like a boomerang. Tony yiped and ducked the blow, frowning when the axe imbedded itself into his wall.
Thor tackled Skurge, and the two of them went flying out the window.
Clint ran to the window and peered below. "They're both fine," He relayed. "And now they're battling it out on the street and the pedestrians are freaking. Dang, this will be a lot of paper work."
"Should we follow?" Belleview inquired.
"I'll take care of them," Clint said. "You guys go help Nat. Oh, and if Rogers isn't there already, call him in."
"I think he will be," Tony remarked. "If you hadn't noticed, he and Natashalie get along pretty well. Reindeer Games might have some competition."
"Are they a couple or something?" Belleview inquired.
"Not particularly," Tony said. "I don't think there's much shipping in this story. Besides Pepperony, and maybe small bits of Thane. Unless you're counting the whole Amora thing. What is that? Thora? Thmora? MagicThunder?"
"Okay," said Clint, blinking a bit. "You lost us again."
"Don't worry your pretty little head, Legolas," Tony said. "That's for the readers following along at home."
Much to everyones confusion, Loki threw his head back and laughed loudly. "Watch it, Stark," he said with a smile. "You're breaking enough walls around here, the fourth ought to remain in place."
Tony smiled. "Right you are, Lokes," He said.
"Dude, I am so lost," Clint said, shaking his head. "Are you guys talking about the gossip magazines?"
"Um... sure," Tony said. "We should, uh, take off now."
Clint rolled his eyes and began climbing down the tower wall easily. Tony mentally added 'Westley', 'Man-In-Black', and 'Jason Bourne' to his repertoire of nicknames for him. Although, now that Tony thought about it, he already kind of looked like the guy in the newest Bourne movie. In Legacy, Aaron Cross. Yeah. It... actually was pretty uncanny.
Loki turned to him and raised an eyebrow elegantly. "Shall we?" He asked, gesturing with his hand for Tony to lead the way.
Under his suit, Tony smiled. "We most certainly shall," He said grandly. "Onwards!"
When Tony rocketed into the room where the other fight was going on, he nearly groaned aloud.
Steve was indeed fighting with Natasha, but it didn't look good. For one thing, there were only three Asgardian warriors, none of them blue giants. For another thing, Natasha was looking pale and bleeding from her shoulder, trying to evade the largest Asgardian's many attempts to stab her with a sword. And Steve was fighting without a shield, two to one. And he was panting.
Tony immediately fired his repulsers at Natasha's combatant, and then refired and landed on top of him, stomping repeatedly and forcing him through the floor before rocketing back up and letting the Asgardian get scorched by his jets.
Belleview shot at one of the warriors Steve was fighting, but it didn't seem to do much other than make him mad, so Tony shot repulsers at him too as Belleview tried a different tactic and threw a knife that hit the guy's exposed shoulder.
The warrior yelled and pulled the knife out of his shoulder, turning slowly to face them with a snarl. He raised his sword, and then Natasha slit his throat, having crept up behind him while he was distracted.
"Nice going, Nat," Tony said appreciatively before turning his attention to the last warrior that was here. "Hey! You're out numbered, genius! Give up now or go the same way as your buddies!"
The Asgardian threw a large knife at Tony and backed against the wall, keeping his sword at the ready. Tony ducked to avoid the blow and frowned.
"Okay," He said. "Don't say I didn't warn you, bro. I'm releasing the cat."
Loki, who had been watching the fight calculatingly, looked up at Tony and turned his head to the side curiously.
"Yeah, I mean you," Tony confirmed, rolling his eyes. "Go do... Whatever it is that you do. But just don't... get evil on us."
"I thought you said I was evil, Stark," Loki said sarcastically. "You wouldn't ask me to change my very nature, would you?"
Before Tony can grin and make some responding comment about every villain being lemons or suggesting that Loki be Snape*, considering the whole good/bad debate that was going on*, Loki rushed towards the Asgardian and pushed him further against the wall, putting a knife to his throat.
"What do I call you?" He asked in a smooth, disinterested tone of voice.
"What do you want?" The Asgardian spit instead of answering.
"I just want information," Loki answered, giving the warrior an innocent look. "And perhaps to kill you later because you attacked a lady" His way of saying he didn't like that Natasha was hurt, of course. "My my, what an ungentlemanly thing to do. It is not good for a warrior of Asgard, you know. I ask you again, what is your name?"
"I'm not telling you anything!" The guy announced.
"That's a funny name," Tony interrupted. "And a bit long too. Man, your parents must've hated you. Mind if I call you Any? Telly, maybe? 'You' doesn't really work, when you think about it. Uh, I could call you INTYA, if you like that better."
"Stark, don't interrupt me while I'm working," Loki said, throwing Tony a glare. "It's not conducive to a professional atmosphere."
"Right, right, sorry," Tony held up his hands in surrender, grinning behind his faceplate. "Just wanted to help Intya out there."
"My name is Agilamuduz," Intya said with a snarl. "And I am the mightiest-."
"Nope, sorry," Tony cut him off. "You're already Intya. You see, that's what you get for not cooperating."
"You get called Intya?" Natasha asked dryly, looking like she was trying to contain a smile, even though she was still bleeding.
"Exactly," Tony said, raising an eyebrow. "Though perhaps not always the name Intya. There can be some... variety. I mean, you didn't cooperate when we first met and now you're Natashalie, so... Yeah, that's what happens."
"I suppose that makes sense," Belleview agreed with a thoughtful nod.
"So, Intya," Loki said to Agilamuduz, his mouth twitching slightly. "Tell me, where is your Frost Giant friend and his companion?"
Intya just growled menacingly. "When our leader, the great Executioner gets here..." He trailed off threateningly.
"You mean the one fighting my brother?" Loki inquired sarcastically. "The one who dared engage the mighty Thor in battle? I suppose he doesn't realize that no one has bested him with a blade in near on a thousand years and, not to mention, the fact that he is destined to one day rule over all of Asgard and all of you as well, to do as he pleases and have you all executed. If his father's favor and love for him was not enough to have you all executed for your treachery and disrespect towards the crown prince already. Perhaps your Skurge will do the honors when you stand at the gallows. He is the Executioner, after all."
Wow. Making him uncertain of his leader in one hit, making him rethink the intelligence of the mission in another, and then making him fear for his life in the next. Plus, adding insult to injury with the use of sarcasm and making fun of Skurge's stupid name.
Tony, at least, was impressed.
"If, that is," Loki said calmly, letting the knife trail over Intya's neck. "I do not simply kill you now. You know, Intya my friend, I think you'd have a spectacular time in Helheim."
Ouch. Double threat, Loki and his daughter.
"I thought he didn't really like Thor," Belleview muttered to Natasha, who just shook her head a little in a 'I'll explain later' sort of way. Which, she shouldn't have to, considering Tony was pretty certain he'd already told Belleview that Thor was one of the few people Loki actually did like.
"I bet Hela has a 'don't mess with Daddy' policy," Tony inputted helpfully, deciding to wait to berate Belleview for his lack of listening skills later.
"As if I would be frightened at the threat of a common woman," Intya said, though he gulped slightly in obvious nervousness.
"That 'common woman' is queen of the dead," Loki said coldly. "With power only contested by that of the Norns. And, not to mention, she was quite handy with a knife, last I saw her. Learned from the best, you see."
"And you've seriously never heard the 'woman scorned' thing?" Tony demanded in shock. "Okay, just think of it this way. Your Enchantress at her worst, except driven by emotion and protectivity."
"Arguably not a word," Loki commented contemplatively. "But still, if I were to send you gift wrapped with a note to my dear daughter, you poor simple mammal, I'm sure she would be more than accommodating."
"Okay, I'm missing something here," Steve mumbled in confusion. "Queen of the dead? What?"
"Loki's daughter," Natasha informed him. "And I'm sure I'd get first class treatment, right Loki?"
Loki paused, reflecting on this. "Well, I suppose," He said. "It all depends on the manner of your death and I am fairly certain you would be granted the leisure suites as it were even without my good word. And Hela and I have not... talked in a while." He frowned and got a closed off expression on his face. "However, at the moment it matters little. Let us cross that bridge when we get to it."
"I hope that's not anytime soon," Steve said.
"Wow Cap," Tony scoffed. "Way to be morbid. Here we are, about to kill this guy, and you're talking about death without even thinking about how that might affect his nerves? For shame."
"What?" Steve said, looking frustrated. "But you all were just-"
"Anyway," Tony interrupted, turning back to Intya. "Lokes asked you a question, Intya. It's really rude to just... let things go unanswered like that. Where's your two buddies?"
Instead of answering, the warrior just started laughing crazily. Which was really a bad idea for him, when you thought about the fact that Loki's knife was still pressed into his throat.
Belleview blinked in bewilderment. "Er," He said blankly. "Why is he laughing?"
"I presume he is either cracking under the stress or mad already," Loki said with a frown. "Mad people do tend to laugh at moments such as these. Oh well. It simply increases my chances of getting information out of him."
"You have no idea," Intya chuckled. And indeed, he did look rather mad at the moment. Tony gritted his teeth because there it was again, him thinking like Loki talked. It just had to stop.
"Where. Are. They?" Loki said slowly, taking a step forward and making blood trail down Intya's throat. "Are they helping the Executioner? Are they looking for the agent?"
"You are nothing," Intya laughed.
"I am a man with a dagger at your throat who is prepared to kill you," Loki corrected. "And unless you want to die..." He trailed off and looked up at Tony before he started to laugh as well, throwing his head back.
"...Er," Tony said uncertainly. "Lokes? You okay there?"
"In this circumstance?" Loki said, smiling in a manic sort of way. "Physically, I am fine and mentally remains to be seen, as it were. It is just that I can be quite dull at times, Stark. I really can. How stupid of me!"
Natasha and Steve exchanged wary looks and Belleview shifted his weight, his eyebrows pulling together. Even Intya paused, his lips slightly parted in curiosity. Obviously, his little insane scene wasn't going quite how he had planned it.
"So... Hints would be nice here Games," Tony prodded. "None of us know what you're talking about. Not even Intya, and he's apparently so much smarter than all of us."
"JARVIS," Loki said, looking up at the ceiling and offering J a grin. "Can you please enlighten me as to where our clever guests are located at the moment?"
"I thought you would never ask," JARVIS quipped.
"Oh," Tony said, nodding. "Of course. You see, I should've thought of that. Excitement of the day, I guess."
"Sir and Loki," JARVIS said, apparently not interested in singling out Natasha, Steve, Belleview, or Intya. "Our distinguished guests are on the seventy eighth floor, making use of the library."
"Making use of?" Tony repeated angrily. "That's Bruce's library! They better be ready to pay for all the damages, those books were expensive!" Turning to Intya, he frowned. "You got any money on you?"
"Is that really an issue right now?" Belleview asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Belleview, my friend," Tony sighed. "I'm dealing with an avid book-reader who can turn into a giant, angry, beast-thing who has no idea how to handle his emotions. You don't mess with the books."
"You never told me you had a library, Stark," Loki commented, his eyes lighting up with interest. "There are books in my lounge, but the selection is small compared to the Asgardian libraries."
"Asgardian libraries?" Tony snorted. "Please. You ain't seen nothing yet!"
"... Ain't?" Loki asked, quirking an eyebrow.
"I am still here, you know," Intya cut them off, glaring.
"You might not want to remind us," Steve frowned at him and then turned to the others. "What do we do with him?"
"Hela's land is not particularly over-crowded," Loki remarked.
"We're not killing him," Steve said strictly. "Not in cold blood."
"Though if you try to run," Natasha said to Intya warningly. "I, for one, won't have a problem with shooting you."
"Your mortal guns do little," Intya spat.
"Yet the knives here are quite effective," Loki commented, nudging the Asgardian that Natasha had slit the throat of with his boot. He wrinkled his nose slightly in distaste. "Stark, you'll have to get new carpets, I'm afraid."
"Eh," Tony shrugged. "I'm a billionaire. I can afford these things."
"Wait for SHIELD?" Steve said.
Tony blinked. "...What?" He asked in confusion, not understanding what he meant.
"Should we wait for SHIELD?" Steve repeated, turning to Tony. "To come and pick up Intya? I mean, they will come, with all the stuff happening. They should, at least."
"Especially with Thor and the Rock wrestling on the streets," Tony agreed thoughtfully. He turned to Steve. "And I thought you meant that we should wait for SHIELD before I buy new carpets."
"No," Steve said with a frown. "Why would you have to wait for SHIELD to buy new carpets?"
"I don't know," Tony huffed. "You're the one who said it."
"I am still right here," Intya growled in exasperation.
"Natasha, my dear?" Loki inquired, turning to Natasha with a grin.
Natasha sighed in surrender. "Yes, Loki my sweet?" She responded sarcastically.
Loki laughed in genuine pleasure, a smile lighting up his face. Tony committed the sight to memory, as Loki didn't often really smile. Natasha and Steve both looked surprised as well, and Belleview gave a little half laugh himself in response.
"Would you mind staying with the ever so lovely Mr. Intya?" Loki asked. "Perhaps with Mr. Rogers to assist you in keeping him company?"
"While you and Stark go after the others," Natasha nodded. "It would be my genuine pleasure."
"Yeah, thanks for making decisions for me, Lokes," Tony said in annoyance. "It's nice to know you're around to be my spokesperson."
"And you were doing excellent at choosing for yourself," Loki argued, rolling his eyes and stepping away from Intya finally. The Asgardian took a deep breath and Loki threw him an annoyed look. "I didn't hear any other suggestions. Except waiting for SHIELD so we could buy new carpets."
"I never said-" Steve started, throwing his hands in the air.
"If I may interrupt," JARVIS interjected in a slightly nervous tone of voice. "Miss Jane and Miss Potts are currently on their way to the library."
"Stop her!" Tony commanded.
"Stark," Loki said, his voice urgent. "It should be fairly simple, there are only two. We can take them down before Lady Potts and Foster even reach their destination if we are quick enough."
"Then why are we still sitting here talking about it?!" Tony demanded.
"Because I wanted to tell you what I thought we should do before we did it to avoid any miscommunications," Loki answered, gritting his teeth. "Now if there are no more questions, we should go and save your beloved." He paused. "And Thor's... lady."
*If Loki was Snape, with Tasha being Lily still, Clint might be James. Tony being Sirius, of course, and Bruce being Lupin (I don't know about Wormtogue). Though, doing first generation, who would Thor be? And Jane and Amora and Sif? Steve can be... I don't know... Arthur? No, that wouldn't work because hello! We do not have a Molly! I suppose Amora could be Bellatrix but that really wouldn't work because Thor is not Voldemort. Malekith could be Voldemort... I don't know. What do you guys think?
Yokay, here we are, at the end of another chapter. I hope you liked reading it, and don't forget to review! I love reviews, they always make me happy. NEXT CHAPTER! Jane, Pepper, libraries, Frost Giants, and Loki being spectacularly awesome, of course. Also, maybe more about Loki's torture.
Haha... Hahaha... Hahahahahahahahaha. Evil laughter because, you're just gonna have to wait to read it. HAHAHAHAHA!
Okay, I'm done. Go about your business.
Jo~