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CHAPTER ELEVEN

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A/N:- Banner by FatesLoveQueen http:/yfrog(dot)com/oed60p

I own nothing. Boydblog helped me with this and I'll be forever thankful.

She fixed. I fiddled. Any mistakes that remain are on me.

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EDWARD CULLEN

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I was curled in on myself when Alice found me.

I hadn't moved an inch since my family had all but dragged me into the room—my new room in a house far away from Bella.

When I first returned to them after fleeing my old bedroom in anguish over what I had said to push Bella away, their wall of thoughts that welcomed me provided no solace. They all worried about Bella, and they all regretted leaving Forks. The guilt they felt echoed my own, and it was too much for me to bear.

Contrary to my own desires, I'd shouted at them that we weren't going back to Bella. Over the months, they thought less about Bella. They never truly forgot about her, their minds drifted to thoughts of her intermittently—especially Esme, worrying as only a mother could—but it wasn't like that for me.

My mind never needed to drift back to memories of Bella, because it never stopped thinking about her. There was no reprieve for me, nothing to distract me, but neither did I want one. If the memory of her was all I could have, I wanted to live with it constantly. I wanted to wrap the time we'd had together around me like a cloak and wear it with both pride and shame.

I didn't move to acknowledge Alice. I knew she would say, or think what she needed to communicate—regardless of whether or not I was paying attention—yet she was staying uncharacteristically quiet. Her thoughts were chaotic and…panicked? She had something urgent to tell me, something she'd seen despite my requests for her not to look.

Jasper sensed her concern and appeared beside her almost instantly. He kept his mind as blank as he could to make it easier for Alice to share her thoughts as he sent his calming influence over us.

'Edward, there's something wrong with Bella.'

My body locked in place at hearing her thoughts; Jasper's calming influence seemed ineffective. Alice's words were the last ones I ever wanted to hear, but ones I'd been anticipating for months.

"What?" I croaked.

Around the house, I heard a series of shocked thoughts. No one had heard my voice since I returned after leaving Bella. I hadn't needed to say anything. After all, what was there left to say after I'd lost—not lost, left—the only thing I'd ever truly loved.

The rest of my family began to gather around us, concerned by the one-sided conversation. Each of them was well aware of the implications.

I watched as Alice replayed a vision she'd had while out hunting. I creased my brow in confusion. It was just Bella watching TV with Charlie, there didn't appear to be anything unusual. There was a vacant look in Bella's eyes which hurt to see, but I'd seen the same emptiness in each one of Alice's visions since we'd left Forks.

'It's the same,' Alice thought. 'Always the same. The haze in her eyes. No matter how far in the future I look, it's there.'

I felt responsible for what Alice was seeing; it was too much for me to witness it. I wanted to run back to Bella's side and confess my love until the look left her eyes, never to return.

'It's always the same', Alice repeated. 'At least until…'

The words in her thoughts silenced, replaced by images.

Bella: immortal, red-eyed and crazed. A shadowy figure stood by and watched on as Bella destroyed a campsite and drained the inhabitants.

I felt like I was going to be sick. There were no words to describe the horror I felt seeing the shocking vision of my beautiful, innocent Bella as a monster—a harbinger of death. I wondered whether my thoughts of returning to Forks were the catalyst for the change. I betrayed my heart's desire and instead focused on staying as far from Bella as I could.

The vision remained unchanged in Alice's mind.

I finally managed to form a word. "How?"

'I'm not sure. It's almost like something is stopping her from healing now. Somehow that leads to...'

I repressed the shudder that wanted to trace up my spine.

"We need to go back to Forks," I said. It wasn't a question or a request for permission. It was a statement.

Immediately I heard Esme's overwhelming joy and Rosalie's scornful disbelief.

"We can't just move back to Forks," Rosalie said bluntly.

Images ran through her mind of having to force our way back into a community that just barely accepted us before. We would be firm outsiders now.

I knew moving back to Forks wouldn't help Bella. I just wanted to find out what was wrong and fix it. I couldn't even let her know I was there, it was sure to make matters worse.

Carlisle jumped to my defense. "Rosalie—"

"She's right," I cut him off. "We can't move back there."

There were thoughts of dissent amongst my family, but they were short-lived. Even Esme—who would have given almost anything to move back to where Bella was, if only to see me happy again—was relieved that I had some life in me again.

'That's enough for the moment,' she thought.

I couldn't even look at her out of shame for what I'd done to my family with the stupid choice I'd made. I began to wonder whether there was a way we could move back, but I couldn't concentrate on it until I knew my Bella was safe.

I looked at my family members. I wanted a contingent that was big enough to deal with any threat, but small enough to move without detection.

"Carlisle, Alice and I will go."

Emmett's outrage at being excluded passed quickly when he saw Rosalie's relief at not being listed.

Jasper's thoughts were firm. 'Alice is not going without me.'

I nodded at Jasper to indicate that he could come. I realized that his talent might be handy depending on what exactly we were dealing with.

I shook my head when Esme made a similar mental note. Four was possibly already too great a number to pass into town unnoticed.

We spent a few hours gathering everything we would need and getting ready to leave. Alice kept a constant watch on Bella, trying to detect anything that would tell us what we were dealing with. I concentrated on Alice's thoughts above all others and watched as the shell that used to be my Bella interacted groggily with the world.

By the time night fell, we were loading into Carlisle's Mercedes. Our plan was to return to Forks late at night while no one was watching and leave it at our deserted house. From there, we would move on foot if needed so that no one would realize we had returned.

It might have been quicker to run the whole way from Alaska, but we would have had difficulty moving together, especially during the day.

Carlisle took over the driving while Jasper, Alice and I discussed our plan.

The first step had to be surveillance. I had to know whether Bella was so lifeless because of me or whether Alice was right and something else was affecting her.

With each mile that passed beneath the tires, I felt life returning to me. I knew some might argue that it was because I finally had a sense of purpose, something to focus on aside from the ever present pain. I knew better though. I knew it was because each extra inch we traveled was an inch closer to my love. She was the only one that could fix my shattered heart. It was too much to hope that maybe I could help mend hers.

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The instant we exited the car, everyone was on high alert—most of all me. There were fresh scents saturating our house. One of them made sense: Bella's. I had pressed a spare key into her palm moments before leaving her. I knew it was a mistake even as I was doing it, but I wanted to leave her a token. It wasn't a surprise that she'd come back to this house.

The other scent was unknown but was one that made my jaw clench and my body sink slightly into a crouch. It was a vampire, but one I'd never encountered before. The thought of another vile creature—possibly even a non-vegetarian—being near my Bella was enough to send me into a rage.

It was only Jasper's and Carlisle's firm grip around my waist—advantage gained in the moment it took to process the scent—that prevented me from tracking the demon and killing it immediately.

Both Carlisle's and Jasper's minds were in unison as they attempted to calm me. They knew, as I would have if I'd been able to move past the madness, that rational thinking and investigation were needed before we could make any assumptions.

'Perhaps it was just a nomad passing through who came to investigate after detecting our scents in the forest. Alice would have seen if Bella was in any danger,' reasoned Carlisle.

My jaw was clenched so tightly that the sharp edges of my teeth ground together noisily.

"We need to do a little reconnaissance," Alice said.

"I have to go to Bella's." I left no room for argument in my statement.

It was late enough in the evening that Bella would be asleep. I'd always been able to run to her house unseen. The only question that remained was whether I could force myself to leave again before the sun rose in the morning.

"I'll come with you," Jasper said quietly. He had sensed my uncertainty and, although he didn't know why I felt it, he wanted to lend me his support.

'It's the least I can do after the trouble I caused.'

"It wasn't your fault," I said. "I made the decision to leave. If her birthday party hadn't been the catalyst, something else would have been."

He shifted his eyes away from mine as Alice whispered her support in his ear. No matter how many times we told him otherwise, he would always blame himself.

He nodded to Alice before turning to me. "Let's go."

The trip to Bella's house made my heart feel a thousand ton lighter. I could barely believe how much freedom and joy I found in retracing steps I'd run so many times before. Even the worry of another vampire nearby was dampened as the realization sank in that I was going to see her again. She was alive—Alice confirmed it—and that was enough for me.

As the house came into view, my pace increased. I was loping through the trees faster than ever before. Jasper was left far behind me as I sped toward the black window; to my ultimate goal.

Bella's bedroom.

Everything else fell away.

I heard nothing. Even Jasper's thoughts seemed dulled, as if they were coming through gauze—or more appropriately, a Bella-induced haze.

As soon as I judged I was close enough to the house, I leapt silently for the window. My fingers caressed the windowsill and I felt whole. If my heart had still been beating, it would have thudded a rhythm to rival the world's fastest drummer.

It had been a few months since I'd left Bella—a blip in the length of my existence—but somehow it had seemed like forever had passed since I was by her side.

I took a deep breath of the air that contained just the lightest concentration of her scent, enough to remind me of how much I burned for her. My throat flamed instantly, but I could easily overpower the urges of the monster within me.

By the time the breath had touched the back of my throat another scent registered, intermingled with Bella's.

I recognized the scent and had to stop myself from crying out in rage.

Why is that scent here?

I peered through the closed window. Had my heart still thundered, the sight I saw would have stopped it cold.

Slowly the Bella induced haze faded away and Jasper's thoughts returned in Technicolor, as well as the thoughts of another.

Another man—another vampire—was sitting on the edge of Bella's bed.

My fingers tightened around soft wood of the windowsill, leaving splintered indents.

I wanted to know what was happening, and why he was in her room. I wanted to throw open the window and issue a challenge to him.

She is mine!

A growl built in my chest, but I managed to suppress the sound before it issued. What I saw in his mind silenced my immediate concern for her safety, even as it stoked the flame of jealousy. Not for the first time I wished I could read Bella's thoughts, if only to know whether his feelings were reciprocated.

I released the sill and fell silently to the ground. Jasper was at my side in a flash.

'What is it?'

I shook my head to indicate we couldn't talk yet; the silent sentinel on Bella's bed may hear even a whispered conversation. I glanced back at the window, wishing it were me in there with Bella.

The thought of challenging him shouted to my mind once more, but I knew I needed further information. I worried that if I made my presence known before I had all the details of their relationship, I could risk alienating Bella further.

Originally I'd come to save her and leave, but now that I'd caught the slightest glimpse of her through a window—even if she was in the company of someone else—I knew I would never be able to leave her again. Even taking the time to move away from her house and talk to Jasper felt like a slow form of torture.

My mind reeled with the image of Bella's visitor. Maybe during the time I'd been away, Bella had moved on, just as I'd thought I wanted her to. That she would fall in love with, let alone meet, another vampire, had never crossed my mind, and the notion terrified me. He would give in to her requests more readily than I could—Alice's vision all but confirmed that to be the case. Unlike me, he obviously didn't see himself as a soulless monster; or maybe he did, and just didn't care.

There was one overwhelming certainty.

He loves her.

It broke me to admit it, but the love and warmth he felt for her, radiated in his thoughts. He wanted to be there for her, to help her mend and find her own inner-strength.

'We'll be in Canada soon if you keep up this pace,' Jasper thought.

I ground to a halt. We'd run for miles, there was no chance the vampire would overhear our conversation.

"There was someone with her."

'Who?' Jasper asked silently. 'A friend?'

I shook my head minutely. The intimate position the stranger had taken on her bed—the position that had once been mine—and the thoughts he was thinking confirmed he wasn't merely a friend.

'A boyfriend?'

Jasper studied me carefully, seeing my involuntary flinch as he said the dreaded word.

'I know it's not what you want, but maybe it's for the best? Maybe he'll be enough to stop Alice's vision coming true. Strange that Alice didn't see him'

I shook my head. "He's like us, Jasper."

Jasper's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

'Another vampire?'

I nodded.

There was a flicker of amusement in his thoughts, but he suppressed it quickly. I would have been upset with him, but I saw that he hadn't intended any harm by it; he was merely recognizing the irony of the situation.

"Thanks." I grimaced.

His mind grew apologetic, but I shook my head. I didn't need apologies for the unintended direction of his thoughts. I needed the strategist within him to help me.

"We need to find out more about him and what he means to Bella."

I slumped as I thought about the fact that she might return his love in kind. I didn't have the certainty of her thoughts to guide me.

"We need to gather information as soon as possible. If he's intending to turn her, as Alice's vision indicated, we need to work quickly. He's going to notice your scent at Bella's window and might move forward any planned timeline."

I felt like I was in a conscious nightmare. Just as I drew close enough to reach for Bella once again, she was snatched away and I was left running to catch up. My head felt groggy and my heart ached with the pain of a thousand deaths. In that moment, I would have taken the agony of transformation over the heartache I endured.

"First, we need someone with an in—someone that Bella trusts—to help us get information about her suitor."

The word suitor stabbed through my chest more effectively than any saber, the wound greater and more gaping. I struggled to remain upright as the consequence of my rash actions played out before my eyes.

I'd hurt Bella by leaving, and now I was possibly hurting her further by coming back.

Jasper had continued talking while I broke down internally, but was now staring at me in silent expectation.

'Do you know of anyone who might be able to help?'

My mind finally provided details about what he was asking: someone that Bella trusted. I thought hard, but came up with no one. Our relationship had been so insular when we were together. In the months before we left, my family and myself were Bella's closest friends. I had stripped all of that friendship away when I'd made the choice to leave her. My guilt increased a thousand-fold. I couldn't comprehend that I'd abandoned her so thoroughly. I hated myself more than I ever thought possible.

Slowly one name did surface in my mind. One who knew the legends of the cold ones and would be willing to help Bella.

Jacob Black.

I wasn't sure whether he believed the stories, but he did belong to the tribe of shape-shifters. If they knew what was happening, they would want Bella safe—and any human drinker dead.

It was a long shot, but it was one that was definitely worth investigating.

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