Chapter 11
A Vulcan Point of View
Archer found Trip stuffed in the corner of the Mess Hall with his nose stuck in a padd. He must be catching up on his monthly engineering subscriptions. "Mind if I join you?"
"Hey, Jon. Have a seat."
Jon tilted his head toward the padd Trip was holding. "New engineering manual?"
"Nah. Not work related at all." Trip had found a padd tucked into the side of the cushions where T'Pol had placed it, he assumed to keep him from finding it.
Jon noted Trip had turned the padd off and put it in his lap so he couldn't look at whatever he had been reading. "Any luck with the Vulcan ship?" Jon knew Trip, T'Pol, and Jaran had been working on the repairs most evenings.
"No. T'Pol contacted every source she has trying to find information on that warp drive and no one has it or is willing to give it to her. T'Ana's father was some bigwig in the High Command and still has a lot of pull and they're all afraid of him." The High Command had been dismantled, but some of the members still held power in the new government.
"I'll never understand how things work on Vulcan. Not marrying the person your parents want happens all the time on Earth and we don't banish anybody." The whole arranged marriage thing completely baffled Archer.
"It's different on Vulcan and they both knew what the consequences were when they...b..married." He almost said bonded, which might have started Jon down a completely new line of questions. "T'Pol has explained most of it to me and I still don't understand how some of it works. They seem to be stuck between being logical and unemotional and these old traditions and rituals that are totally illogical and from a time when emotions weren't suppressed."
"It's nice to know they haven't got everything figured out. They always project this air of having all the answers, but they obviously don't." Archer had always hated that Vulcans came across as being superior to most other species. Knowing they had problems like everyone else was gratifying.
"It's going to get worse before it gets better. The old school Vulcans aren't just going to accept the Kir'Shara. They've spent the major part of their lives believing what the High Command told them. Getting them to change is going to be a long process, but things will change. Some things already are." There were priests and others who were still willing to accept diversity and allow adult Vulcans to make their own choices. T'Pol said she believed there were more Vulcans who had been hiding or just keeping a low profile like Ambassador Soval had.
"I'm looking forward to having a good working alliance with them instead of their usual 'big brother' we need to watch over and guide humans' approach. Ambassador Soval and I may never be friends, but he at least seems to be less hostile to me. He seems to hold you in high esteem lately. He's suggested I utilize you and T'Pol, as a team, for more first contacts." Archer had to admit that whatever his officer's personal relationship was it had not interfered with their professional one. In fact, Soval was right it had only enhanced their ability to work together. The thing Archer worried about was if spending all this time together was too much.
"Soval's not who I thought he was all this time. He's the reason we have any of the manuals for Jaran's ship, but even he can't get the sections on the warp drive. T'Pol says it's not classified, and she doesn't have enough warp engineering know-how to be of any help." The drive was warp 3 maybe 4 if pushed for short periods of time, but the Vulcans wouldn't budge.
"If you can't repair it we may have to make some unscheduled visits to the planets they were headed to until they find a home." Archer couldn't leave them out here with only an impulse engine. The Vulcans would have raised no objections if he'd left them on the planet they crashed landed on.
"Have Travis start plotting the coordinates for the nearest settlement. We're going to try again tonight, but I don't really expect any progress." T'Pol was book smart not always practical and street smart, as Trip's dad used to say. She could memorize and then analyze facts and figures but couldn't conceptualize all that data into the abstract and unfortunately it was a skill one couldn't learn. You either had it or you didn't.
Trip waited until Jon had moved away from the table before resuming his reading. The training Vulcans gave to their females regarding mating fascinated him. Why had T'Pol hidden this? Was she ashamed that she had abandoned her heritage or was she afraid he'd require her to adhere to it? This must have come from T'Ana and went a long way to explaining T'Pol's behavior whenever the Vulcan female was nearby. Trip felt the presence of the bonded couple last time T'Pol had grabbed his hand with that defiant attitude. What T'Ana had said to her he didn't know, but it pissed her off like nothing else ever had, even him.
"All senior staff to the bridge," blasted through the comm system. Trip entered his lock code into the padd, stuffing it into his pocket, and ran through the doors on his way to see what the emergency was.
The viewscreen showed several Vulcan starships surrounding Enterprise. "My Chief engineer can answer any questions you have regarding the ship." Trip heard Archer tell the Vulcan when he exited the lift. Since when did Vulcans pose a threat?
Archer turned to Trip. "Commander, Shahn here would like some information about Jaran's ship."
"What exactly do you want to know?" Trip inquired of the Vulcan.
"Have you repaired the warp drive?" Shahn asked.
"Not yet, we're still working on it." That was a lie really, but Trip wasn't in the mood to be cooperative with an unknown Vulcan.
"I wish to speak to my daughter, T'Ana." Shahn said insistently.
Jaran and T'Ana refused to come to the bridge. Archer summoned them when the Vulcans appeared. "I'll speak to her and if she agrees you can come aboard ..."
"Captain T'Ana can only speak to her father if her husband agrees, so you must ask Jaran first." Trip interjected and T'Pol shot him a surprised look.
"Commander Tucker, your association with T'Pol has furthered your understanding of our culture." T'Ana's father commented. "Just because you are..."
Trip felt a jolt of panic run through him that had to be from T'Pol. Another Vulcan became visible on the viewscreen moving toward Shahn. He was about to say something to him when Trip jumped in. "Zadik tun-bosh." (Forbidden careful). It was the first words of warning that came to mind. The Vulcans must choose their words wisely. Trip wished he could read lips as the Vulcan Captain who was now standing next to Shahn leaned in to say something to him.
The same captain stepped forward. "Commander Tucker, I am Captain Sirach. It is unfortunate when a human must remind a Vulcan of his honor and duty." His gaze went to Shahn. "Would you and Jaran meet with me and Shahn to discuss this matter?" The captain politely asked.
Trip caught his veiled thank you for his quick thinking. "I'd be glad to and I'll speak to Jaran. We'll meet you in the docking bay as soon as your shuttle arrives." Trip walked to Ensign Sato's station, whispering to her, "Would you contact Jaran and ask him to meet me in docking bay..." He looked to Reed for which bay the Vulcans would be cleared to dock in. Malcolm held up two fingers. "..docking bay 2?"
"Right away, sir." Hoshi let him know. "You know the UT would have translated for you?" She told him curious as to why he would bother to speak Vulcan.
"It translates for us, not them." Trip didn't let on that he hadn't considered that as he tried to discern what the expression on Jon's face was all about. He only thought about the shock value of speaking in their native language. He needed to stop Shahn from continuing, so he counted on the reaction he received from all other Vulcans. First, because it would have disgraced all the Vulcans to have him bring up private matters in front of the humans present and second because it would have brought up questions about the true relationship between him and T'Pol.
As Trip started toward T'Pol he thought to include the Captain. He'd already excluded him from the most of what had just happened. He returned his eyes to the viewscreen. "Captain Sirach, would you object to Captain Archer and Commander T'Pol joining us?"
"The captain is welcomed if he wishes, but Commander T'Pol's presence is not required." Sirach left no doubt that this was to be a discussion for the males only. From what Trip knew of Vulcans this didn't come as a surprise.
The information Trip had been reading described a male dominated society as far as marriage was concerned. Females were equals in the working environment, but were totally at the mercy of their mate once their bond was fully formed. The material he read also outlined training all Vulcans were required to take to prepare them to meet every need of their mates without question. The male and his family had final and total control unless the female or her family negotiated pre-conditions to the marriage, which were written up into a binding contract. That answered his questions as to why the female was allowed to challenge the marriage, but there was no such out for the male. The female had one chance to choose a mate she knew and cared about and would treat her as she wished to be treated. And that bond would only be allowed after a fight to the death with her chosen mate.
There was no point in arguing with the Vulcans so Trip turned to T'Pol. "I need to talk to you a minute." He motioned for her to follow as he moved toward the turbolift. On the way, he pulled the padd from his pocket, punched in the code, and handed it to her. "Is this all still valid?" He needed to know so he knew what the possible outcome in the discussions with the Vulcans might be.
The look in T'Pol's eyes told him she was upset and maybe a little scared. "Don't worry we can talk about all this later, but right now I need to know if Jaran has anything to be concerned about. Can T'Ana's father do anything to either of them?" He tried to assure her as much as he could with the onlookers on the bridge that she had nothing to be concerned about.
"Her father no longer has responsibility for his daughter. Her husband must provide whatever she requires without interference from her family without just cause." According to Vulcan law, the male must ensure his mate was well cared for or face the intervention of her family. If the female cooperated and proof of the lack of care or any abuses could be provided the male could suffer severe consequences, even death.
"Okay, then I'll go see what they want and then you and I can have some lunch in our quarters and talk." Trip took a firm hold on her hand. "Relax, it's nothing bad. I just have a couple of questions." He almost saw the frown on her face as he felt her discomfort. He smiled again at her.
"I will have chef make a tray for us." T'Pol tried to relax, but could not. Explaining her culture was complicated. It was on one hand very open and accepting of females until they married. From then on they were expected to care for their home and mate and any children the couple produced. If their duties did not demand all their time and if their husband agreed they could hold a position outside the home, but it in no way could interfere in their primary duty to husband and family. T'Pol's own mother had stayed home with her and only returned to her teaching position once T'Pol was no longer home during the day. T'Les had cared for T'Pol and her father making it possible for him to provide for his family. Her father's duty was to work and provide the best life possible for his family, no matter what.
On the way to the docking bay Trip and Jaran walked behind Captain Archer as they spoke. There were several topics of interest that Trip would have liked to broach with the Vulcan, but they had to concentrate on this upcoming meeting. "Other than Shahn wants his daughter to dump you and marry the mate he picked out for her is there any other issues he might want to discuss?"
"My own father wishes the same for me. My chosen has been unable to find a mate and my family may believe they are responsible for assisting her. When my time came I did not appear at the ceremonial grounds for the ritual and instead joined with T'Ana." So when his time hit he somehow bonded to a female other than the one he was betrothed to. As far as Trip was aware the original bond had been very weak and faded or a priest removed the previous bond; therefore; allowing the new bond to form.
"Have you ever considered that things are changing on Vulcan and it might not be such a bad idea to go back." The Kir'Shara was already bringing change and would continue to do so for years.
"We would be shunned by our families unless we were to sever our bond and undergo the Fullara and other rituals so that our bond would no longer exist." Jaran and T'Ana would not return to Vulcan and risk that.
"They'd really make you forget this whole part of your life?" Trip remembered what T'Pol had told him about her months at P'Jem and her time after she resigned from the Ministry of Security. How this could be possible with the family of a prominent member of the government was unfathomable. The news on Vulcan was nothing like that the news on Earth, but Jaran and T'Ana would be well known amongst their peers due to the power and prestige of their father's positions in the High Command. While that power would provide cover for many wrongs, the sudden disappearance of one's child for months and reappearance with a new bondmate should not go unnoticed. But it seemed to be acceptable to do such things to one's child on Vulcan.
"All our memories and emotions would be purged to allow the removal of the bond and then we would be bonded to those our parents betrothed us to. T'Ana's family had arranged for the priest to perform the rituals when several colleagues aided our escape. They provided us with a ship and all we needed to survive." Jaran and T'Ana fled Vulcan to avoid the ritual and would not return now. Their parents were powerful enough in the government of Vulcan to hide any misdeeds they might be guilty of now and in the future.
Trip reconsidered and realized Shahn must have enough pull to detain the couple and force them into whatever he wished. There were half a dozen ships surrounding Enterprise, preventing them from leaving. "You may need to request asylum aboard Enterprise from Captain Archer if they refuse to be reasonable. Starfleet may not be happy about granting your request, but they will."
"What good does that do us if we are held hostage here?" Jaran did not want to draw the crew of Enterprise into private Vulcan matters if it could be avoided.
"Captain Archer will contact Starfleet and request assistance, which will start the process of diplomacy between our politicians. It may take some time, but eventually they'll work it out." The inner workings of Starfleet and the government was not something the engineer ever wanted to get into the thick of.
The shuttle docked and Shahn and Sirach both exited. Shahn and Jaran carried on a discussion in Vulcan. Captain Archer stood nearby watching the expressions on his Chief Engineers face as he followed the conversation. Every time they had dealings with the Vulcans Jon felt a gap between himself and Trip. They were as close as they had ever been, except when anything pertained to T'Pol and the Vulcans. It was a divide Jon was beginning to see as unbridgeable from either end if Trip and T'Pol were unwilling to open up to him about what they kept saying were private matters.
"Captain Archer I would formally like to request asylum aboard Enterprise." Jaran walked away from the Vulcans and waited for Archer's answer.
"I will take your request under advisement. In the meantime you are under the protection of Starfleet." Archer added this to make it plain that there would be consequences for any actions the Vulcans might be considering. He would need to contact Admiral Gardner to have the request approved.
"Thank you Captain. We will speak later." Jaran exited.
Captain Sirach approached. "Commander Tucker may I speak to you privately?"
"Of course, if you'll step this way." Trip lead the captain out of the bay into the corridor.
"Commander, a friend asked that I offer any assistance you needed." Sirach watched the as Trip digested his words.
"We have a few friends on Vulcan, but I'm not sure who would wish to offer their help." Trip only knew T'Les and T'Pau and he had not contacted anyone on Vulcan lately.
"Syrell and I are acquainted. My engineers will bring our shuttle back and see what they can do to repair Jaran's ship. We may not have the parts to repair the warp drive, but if they cannot repair it they will provide you with the manuals and instructions on how to complete the work." Sirach wished to honor the debt owed to the human engineer.
So Sirach was a Syrrannite and Syrell really meant what he'd written. Trip wondered how many others were lurking in the background waiting to step out of the shadows V'Las' government had forced them into? "You don't owe me anything, but I would appreciate any resources you might be able to provide." Trip was beginning to get a full sense of what it meant to have Vulcans indebted to him.
"Would Captain Archer have a problem contacting T'Pau directly regarding the asylum request?" Sirach wanted to avoid the hassle the formal request was bound to create.
"I can't see why he would. What would you suggest we do?" Sirach knew how things worked so accepting his advice seemed prudent.
"Ask him to keep the request informal until he speaks with T'Pau. The High Council may find it more beneficial to recall us than to allow the formal process to begin." T'Pau and the High Council had too much on their minds to let this get out of hand.
Trip knew what he was trying to do. Keep this whole thing from blowing up into a major incident between Earth and Vulcan when it could be dealt with informally. "I will suggest Captain Archer attempt the backdoor diplomacy first."
"If he is successful, once my engineers tell me they have done all they can we should be recalled home." The High Council would feel honor bound to prevent any incidents involving Enterprise from devolving into a power struggle as long as Tucker and T'Pol were crewmembers.
"We appreciate your insight into the situation Captain. Would you tell Syrell I said thank you. Also, when his son is born could you ask that he send us word? I'd just like to know everything worked out okay for him." He'd had a rough time of it and Trip wanted to know his son arrived with no problems.
"I will contact him as soon as we return to Vulcan." Sirach held up his hand to salute Trip. "Live long and prosper, Commander Tucker."
"Peace and long life, Captain Sirach." Trip raised his own hand and responded, before returning to Archer's side back in the docking bay.
"Shahn headed the Ministry of Defense until recently. The High Council replaced him and he's now working under his replacement. Not much going his way lately." Archer hadn't gotten any information about the personal business Shahn was here for, but he had gotten him to discuss the current situation on Vulcan.
"If he's not in charge how did he get them to let him chase after Jaran and T'Ana with all these ships?" Trip's experience taught him that usually when one was demoted his power base also suffered, yet this Vulcan managed to wield considerable influence still.
"This is his last hurrah, I think. He'll return home and serve out his time as a sub-minister or whatever they call their underlings. Can't blame him for trying to get some part of his former life back. His wife probably isn't going to be too happy losing her daughter and all that status and privilege." Archer didn't understand how Vulcan marriages worked, but he was sure some things were universal.
Trip let the comments go. He couldn't find a way to discuss Vulcan marriages without revealing details he'd sworn to keep to himself. "Captain Sirach suggests you talk to T'Pau before you bring any of this to the attention of Starfleet. He's convinced the High Council will want to keep this all very informal."
"That sounds like a good idea. I'll send a message and we'll see." Captain Archer wasn't looking forward to sitting around out here waiting for a bunch of bureaucrats to settle the dispute.
"Sirach is sending some engineers to help me out with the warp drive. He'll need you to keep that out of your reports though. Sort of an unofficial favor that could create some problems for him if certain people back home were to find out." Archer had begun their mission insistent on reporting every detail to Starfleet, but over the years, Trip found he was more reasonable about leaving out certain facts, especially since the Vulcans read all his reports.
"A favor for you and T'Pol or for Enterprise?" Archer didn't need him to answer. Somewhere along the line, Trip's opinion of Vulcans had changed drastically. He trusted them whereas before he had thought them dishonest and arrogant. When the Vulcan captain asked to speak to him Trip went along with out giving it a second thought.
"He didn't say. Someone asked him to provide whatever technical know-how he could and he agreed." Trip hadn't lied really. He omitted the who and Sirach had said he was asked to help, but never said directly that it was a personal favor for Trip.
"When did you get so trusting of the Vulcans? Is it because of T'Pol?" Archer would give Vulcans the benefit of a doubt until they gave him reason not to.
"It's not just the Vulcans you know. T'Pol made me see that if I stopped looking at things from just a human perspective they weren't always as bad as I thought. Some species do things different than we do and that doesn't make it good or bad, right or wrong, it's just the way it is." Jon thought it was because they were involved and his change in attitude only extended to Vulcans, but that wasn't true. She'd started trying to make him see his limited view of reality on their first mission and every mission after that. The toughest challenge being with the Xindi. It had taken Degra's death to make him finally accept that even those you saw as your enemy weren't always the bad guys you wanted to believe them to be.
Jon didn't quite believe him. "So there are other species we've run into that you think might not be as bad as you first thought?"
"Shran and the Andorians, the Cabal, the Xindi, even the Klingons aren't all bad if you can appeal to their sense of honor." Trip hadn't given his worldview much deep thought of late. It had been a while since he and Jon had had one of their philosophical discussions, and they usually took place after a couple of drinks and didn't seem so serious. He just knew that the ordeal with the Xindi had taught him that while some of the Xindi, the Reptilians' they'd met being foremost in his mind, were evil and had no redeemable qualities, not all the species deserved the same reputation. Most Xindi didn't even know what a human was and had never heard of Earth.
"You always were more open to people than I was. I'd have thought being out here would have made you less trusting, but it hasn't." Archer hoped his friend had learned to protect himself more, but it was obvious he hadn't.
"I don't trust people like I used to, but I do try to give them a chance to put their best foot forward before I decide they're not worth it. T'Pol still tells me I need to be careful and I do try, but I can't make myself approach everyone as if they're totally untrustworthy until they prove me wrong. It's not who I am and I don't ever want it to be." Trip had never hated the Vulcans he just didn't like them trying to tell them what to do all the time and acting like babysitters and Jon was right he should have learned to be less trusting but he'd always been the glass is half-full kind of guy not the glass is half-empty sort he became after the Xindi attack. His return to his own true nature was because of T'Pol, not because they were together, but because she had spent time helping him heal the wounds to his psyche.
"I better head back to my ready room and have Hoshi contact the High Council and T'Pau and see if we can keep this from becoming a major falling out between our two governments." Captain Archer wanted nothing more than to avoid being at the center of another major event with Vulcan so soon.
Trip could feel T'Pol moving toward B-deck and their quarters with lunch. "I have somewhere I need to be, so tell Hoshi to comm me when the Vulcan shuttle gets here." Trip's day off so far hadn't been the restful day he planned.
Jon entered the turbolift. "Well, at least your evening plans won't be as unproductive as you thought." Archer knew Trip would be happy to work on the warp drive this evening now that he knew it would most likely be repaired.
---
"T'Pol, why are you so nervous? Do you think I'm mad at you?" Trip had sensed her anxiety level rising, as he got closer to her.
T'Pol sat motionless across the table from him. "T'Pol, I'm not mad. I'm confused, but not mad. Why did you hide that padd from me?"
"T'Ana came to me a few days ago and said I was failing as your mate because I was not fulfilling my duty to our family. Allowing you to touch me in public and not helping you with your emotional control would only make things difficult for you in the future." She'd also mentioned her duty to train any children they might have, in the Vulcan way.
"Did you tell her I'm a human and we don't do very well when we try to suppress our emotions? And what about holding hands could make anything more difficult?" It might make things difficult for T'Pol, but not Trip.
"Did you read all the information on this padd?" T'Pol suspected he hadn't.
"No I got about half-way through it. Why?" Trip picked the padd up.
"A Vulcan wife is expected to stay at home and care for her family. Part of that duty is to help her mate with his emotional control as their bond becomes stronger. Neuropressure has many uses. It can relax and stimulate, but mostly it serves as way for a wife to aid her husband in releasing any emotions he may not be able suppress. It is a wife's duty to ensure that her husband can suppress his emotions in public at all times. If he cannot it may hinder his ability to function in Vulcan society. T'Ana sees me as lacking in my duty as your mate and wished to remind me of my training."
"Is that why you grabbed my hand every time she was nearby?" T'Pol had been acting like a defiant child. He kept his reaction to this to himself. It would only make T'Pol more uneasy if she thought he found it funny.
"It may have been." T'Pol didn't want to admit she had reacted so irrationally.
"Aren't you the one who said it doesn't matter if what we do is Human or Vulcan? We're doing just fine on our own and we're not ever going to try to function in Vulcan society so who cares." The minute 'who cares' came out he wanted to take it back.
"There is much in the data that you will need to know when we marry. You will have certain rights as my husband you should be aware of."
"You're the one that insisted we throw out all the rules and make up our own, so what changed? The most uptight Vulcan female I've met yet tells you you're not honoring your mate and instead of discussing it with him, you listen to her." He just shook his head at her. "T'Pol, there's no human or Vulcan way to do this, so we're not going to read a bunch of Vulcan laws or human laws that are never going to apply to us." He deleted the contents of the padd and handed it to T'Pol.
She let out a deep sigh and relaxed her shoulders a bit. "I have been angry with T'Ana and myself. I did not want to tell you of my anger. My lack of control still troubles me and I know I should not allow my emotions to influence my decisions, but it is difficult." Years and years of Vulcan discipline and training taught her to rely on logic, control, and herself. When she couldn't she was lost.
"It's okay T'Pol. You're allowed to be little nuts sometimes. Hell, I've had more than my fair share of meltdowns in the last four years. Just don't forget I'm here to help you. Talk to me or if you can't do that at least lean on me a little." He knew she still had a hard time accepting that her Vulcan control wasn't always good enough anymore. He just needed to convince her it wasn't a weakness and to ask for his support occasionally.
Trip watched her move to serve lunch. "Chef sent that seafood salad you like. He says it's fresh." She was teetering on the edge, he could feel the tension.
"It's okay T'Pol let it go." Trip wrapped her in his arms. "You don't have to be in control all the time. Don't let that Vulcan pride or guilt of whatever this is tearing you up come between us." Starting from age 3 or 4 a Vulcan child spent hours every day being trained to be in control. Trip knew undoing all that programming was going to take some time. T'Pol could say it was okay, but deep down she still didn't truly believe it.
T'Pol leaned into his chest absorbing all the reassurance he was trying to give her. Trying to convince herself that she could really find the balance between control and letting go. Trying to turn off that voice in her head that said she was a failure as a Vulcan and as Trip's mate.
He felt her relax slightly. "I'd say you should meditate, but you barely have enough time to get some lunch before you have to return to the bridge. Sirach is sending his engineers to help us with the warp drive, so meditate after your shift, and then meet me in the cargo bay. I'll ask Jaran to keep T'Ana out of the way until they're gone." He wanted the Vulcan couple gone if having them here was going to make T'Pol so miserable. "Let's eat then we can start working on getting them on their way."
"I am not hungry, but you could assist me by performing the fifth and eighth positions on me. They are both helpful with emotions." T'Pol looked him directly in the eye.
This was progress. She had not asked him to perform neuropressure on her since that first night when she did it to trick him into letting her return the favor. Their sessions had always been a give and take arrangement. She performed a movement on him and he reciprocated. He started running through the positions in his head counting them off to determine which postures he needed to use. He took her hand and led her to the bench. "Turn around and lay down. We'll have you in good shape in no time." He'd eat lunch alone later and start learning what each of the postures and nodes affected, so that in the future he'd be able to assist her without her having to tell him what to do.
---
"Commander Tucker I wish to thank you for your assistance with Shahn and our ship." Jaran had noticed that the engineer was especially quiet this evening.
"No problem." Trip answered and returned to the injector he was installing. They were doing the finishing touches on the ship to get them back on the search for a home.
"Have I offended you in some way? You seem upset with me."
"It's not you. T'Ana said some things to T'Pol that I didn't much care for, but that's nothing to do with you. In fact, you've been the perfect gentleman around her."
"T'Ana is set in her ways. Even I find it difficult to understand her at times. She must have told T'Pol she was not acting as a proper mate for you?" He and T'Ana had discussed this several times and Jaran had told her she should not interfere.
"Yeah I guess. What bothers me is she has no idea what a human needs yet she told T'Pol what she should be doing as my mate. We don't suppress our emotions and it would kill us if we tried for any length of time. Besides it's not like you two are following the proper Vulcan path either." Trip's frustration came out with his words.
"We spoke of this and I thought she agreed not to say anything. I am sorry if she caused any problems between you."
"It's not a problem really. We keep running into these little bumps in the road while our bond gets stronger, but I don't see that as a problem. It's more like growing pains. I'd just like to keep them as painless as possible. If we were on Vulcan a lot of this stuff wouldn't ever affect us, but being out here surrounded by bunch of emotional beings in ever changing environments makes for an interesting life, but a less than smooth bonding process."
"All Vulcans experience difficulties with the process. If we didn't it would not take a year for the bond to fully form and stabilize. For some there is little change, but for others they are not prepared for the emotional turmoil the bond can create. Some whose duty require it spend years with a priest learning shielding and suppression techniques that will allow them to be separated for long periods of time and distances from their mate." Trip suspected those who experienced little change were those that marrried out of duty not love.
"What I don't understand is how a whole species can exist without really talking about the most intimate aspects of your culture just because it involves those pesky emotions you all want to deny." The more he discovered about Vulcans the more confused he was about their emotional makeup.
"We are taught that emotions are dangerous to ourselves and those around us from the day we are born. According to the Kir'Shara, this may not be true, but it will be many years before Vulcans are able to find the proper balance. It will matter little to off-worlders because my people will always consider that part of their nature as intimate and therefore private. Even you and T'Pol have chosen to keep the details of your bond private from the humans you are closest to."
"I agreed to that out of respect for T'Pol's culture and because I don't have words to explain all this to someone who hasn't experienced a bond. Especially a human who has no concept of linking one mind to another mind." Trip was convinced that many people would see their bond as unnatural and that would make them a curiosity causing the pair to be seen as a disruption to everyone and everything around them.
"Having experienced it for yourself do you find it easier to discuss with anyone other than your mate who knows exactly what you feel without your having to put it into words?"
"I guess not." Trip hadn't considered that before. Most of the interaction in the bond was about his and T'Pol's most deeply held secrets, desires, feelings, and thoughts. "I wouldn't want to discuss it with anyone else."
"You are the only one that your mate will ever truly reveal herself to and for that honor you will do whatever is necessary to keep her safe and with you." Jaran looked off to the far wall thinking of how close he had come to losing his mate.
"Couldn't ever explain that to anyone; even someone who shares the same kind of bond. There aren't words to describe it in either language." Jaran hadn't said anything specific, but Trip was beginning to see that what he saw of T'Ana in public could not be the same as the mate Jaran was thinking about. No guy had that look in his eyes if his mate was as cold and unfeeling as Trip had thought she was. If he were honest, while most Vulcans found T'Pol to be emotional, only a handful of humans would say that about her.
"You humans who have been raised to understand these emotions and deal with them cannot find words, so how would you expect a Vulcan, who has no such training, to discuss something that intimate when they find themselves thrust into a third of the way through their lives." The commander had been right there were no words in Vulcan to describe the relationship between bondmates and few Vulcans would ever use them if they existed.
"Do you know if there are many interspecies couples out there?" Trip couldn't be the only non-Vulcan bondmate out there. The Vulcans had been out in space for well over a century.
"There have been reports of some living in settlements scattered around the Alpha quadrant and there are couples who reside on Vulcan, but they keep to themselves. Reports from home are promising. The new High Council has outlawed discrimination on Vulcan. We have laws now we must wait for the changes in attitudes and beliefs of the people of Vulcan to follow." It would be years before the young Vulcans who would grow up believing in the true principles of the IDIC and Surak's teachings replaced the Vulcans who had been groomed by V'Las and his beliefs.
He remembered having this same conversation with T'Pol. "I wasn't thinking when I suggested you go back. Our laws changed years ago, but there are still some people on Earth who refuse to accept other species or new ideas." Change was inevitable, but slow.