Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail.

Hello everyone! Nothing much to say right now. Just three things:

1) Please check out my other story if you're interested. It would be greatly appreciated.

2) Read the notes at the end-it's very important.

3) Please enjoy the latest chapter of Viscernal's A Diary's Secret!

Fairy Tail—A Diary's Secret

Chapter 11

He didn't know what to do. He didn't know how to react. He was frozen, for he never expected this. Mira was kissing him. Mira, the Demon of Fairy Tail who had enjoyed mercilessly teasing him and picking on him ever since he had joined the guild, was in his arms, pressed against his chest, and kissing him. Was it a dream? That could never happen in real life, right? It would never. Yet why did he feel…at ease? That knot in his stomach that had been there for the past few days had all but melted away and was replaced by yet another new and unfamiliar warmth that was spreading throughout his body. But this time, he knew it wasn't illness. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he knew.

Mira pulled away, stepped back while keeping her one good hand gently against his chest, and looked off to the side with a small smile. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to surprise you like that. I don't know what came over me." There was no response so she looked back at Natsu and saw him staring at her blankly with wide eyes. "Natsu? Are you okay?" He just kept staring at her. She looked at the floor. "Look, I'm sorry, okay? Please don't give me the silent treatment. That's a bit too cruel, don't you think?"

"Mira," he said softly.

She looked up at him. "Yeah?" she said just as softly as if she was afraid that speaking too loudly would spook him like a deer.

"I…"

"What is it?"

The next thing she knew, Natsu was pulling her back against him and his lips were crashing against hers. Her eyes widened in surprise. 'He's kissing me. Natsu is really kissing me.' She closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of his warm lips pressed against hers.

Natsu wrapped his arms tightly around her. 'This feeling is back. I don't get what it is, but…I like it. I like kissing her. Her lips are so soft.'

Mira parted her lips slightly and tickled Natsu's bottom lip with her tongue. 'He's probably too dense to understand, but it's worth a shot.' To her surprise, though, Natsu's lips parted as well and his tongue darted out to meet hers. She moaned softly as Natsu's tongue sensually glided against hers. 'I never would have guessed that he'd be this good of a kisser. Damn.'

Natsu, however, was acting purely on instinct. Even he was surprised at his actions. 'Okay. Not sure what I'm doing right now, but it feels really nice. And it seems like Mira likes it, too. God, she tastes really good.' He glided his right hand up her back to her head. He ran his fingers through her silky white locks while gently gripping her head and turning his head to deepen the kiss.

Mira gasped at Natsu's initiative. 'Has he really never kissed a girl before? If I didn't know him I'd never be able to tell.' She smirked into the kiss as her playful side surfaced. 'Sorry Natsu, but I can't let you be the dominant one.' She pushed against his chest to force him to back up. He didn't resist her and soon he was tripping backwards onto the couch with Mira falling on top of him.

They broke for air, both panting heavily from the passion. She looked down at him and he looked up at her. They could both sense the building desire between them. Natsu reached up to brush some hair behind Mira's ear. "You really are beautiful," he whispered.

She smiled and placed a hand over his. "Natsu," she breathed before leaning down and capturing his lips for another kiss. Their lips instantly parted and Mira drove her tongue into his mouth, exploring every inch of it and sensually dancing with his tongue. 'I've wanted this for so long. I've wanted to kiss him like this for so long.'

Natsu's mind was a blur. The smell and taste of Mira was overwhelming him. 'What is it that I'm feeling right now? It's so strange. It's like I'm excited but nervous at the same time. But I also feel really warm, which is weird for me. But I like this warmth. I wonder what it is, though…ah whatever. I'll try to figure it out later. Right now, she's trying to beat me. And I ain't about to lose!' He quickly sat up and forced Mira onto her back.

Mira was blown away that Natsu was fighting back. She never expected to be on her back. But there she was, pinned underneath Natsu's warm frame as he continued to kiss her ever so passionately. 'I should have figured he wouldn't go quietly. Typical Natsu.' She wrapped her one good arm around his head and combed through his pink hair. Normally she would make sure that she was the dominant one, but for some reason being underneath Natsu was satisfying.

Natsu pulled away and gave her a big grin. "I'm not gonna lose, Mira!"

She pouted. "Geez, Natsu. Why does everything have to be a competition with you?" She reached up, gripped the back of his head, and pulled him back down into the kiss.

The two continued to lose themselves in each other, refusing to separate as they continued their heated lip lock. After quite some time, Mira gently pushed on Natsu's chest. He felt her gesture and pulled away, looking down at her while panting. "What is it?"

She blushed and fidgeted beneath him. "Natsu, can I…"

He waited, but her voice had trailed off completely. "What?"

Her face grew redder. "Can I…stay the night with you?"

He blushed and scratched his cheek. "Yeah sure. I mean, it would definitely make me happy if you stayed."

She sat up, which in turn forced Natsu to straighten up as well, and kissed him tenderly. "Thank you," she whispered as she rested her forehead against his.

"So which would you prefer; couch or hammock? I'll take the other one."

She sighed as she leaned back. "Natsu, you really are dense."

"Hey!"

She gently cupped his face. "When I said 'stay the night with you', I meant that I wanted to fall asleep beside you."

"Oh," he said as he thought about it. As the words sunk in, his eyes began to widen and his blush intensified. "Oh!"

She giggled as she stole another kiss. 'He may be dense and a fight nut, but I'm glad that it was him that I fell in love with.'

"Lisanna! Lisanna! Lisanna, wake up!" Mira shouted as she gently shook her sister. However, her sister wasn't responding and lay there motionless. She was completely still with her eyes closed. Mira rested her head against Lisanna's chest while tears poured from her eyes. "Lisanna."

"Big sister."

Mira's head snapped up with a relieved smile. "Lisanna! Thank goodness you're okay!" Her smile immediately faded and was replaced with a look of dread. Lisanna was staring at her with cold, dead eyes. She was incredibly pale and her face was void of any emotion. "Lisanna?" she whispered fearfully.

"How could you, big sister?" Lisanna asked.

"What are you talking about, Lisanna?" Mira asked.

"How could you, big sister?" Lisanna repeated. "You knew I loved him and as soon as I was gone, you took him for yourself."

Mira shook her head furiously. "No! No, that's not it at all!"

"How could you, big sister? I loved him first. Why would you take him away?"

"Lisanna, please let me explain!"

"How could you, Mira? How could you?"

Mira let her sister go and backed away. "No, I…"

Lisanna limply rose to her feet as if she were being pulled by a rope. She trudged after Mira. "I can't believe you'd turn your back on your own sister. I can't believe you'd take him from me."

Tears were streaming down Mira's face as she crawled backwards. "Please, Lisanna. You're scaring me."

Lisanna's unblinking, lifeless eyes remained fixed on Mira. "You knew I loved him. You knew. I thought you were going to let me be happy."

"Lisanna, you don't understand. I…"

Suddenly, Lisanna was on top of her and pinning her down. Her cold face was inches away from Mira's. "You're a terrible sister."

Mira bolted upright with a loud gasp. Her wild eyes scanned her surroundings in a frenzy, a light sheen of sweat clinging to her skin. Her heavy breathing began to even out as she started to calm down. "A dream," she whispered. "Just a terrible, terrible dream."

She looked down and noticed Natsu sound asleep beside her. The two had fallen asleep together on the couch. There wasn't a lot of space, but Mira didn't mind snuggling closely into his side. Not too long ago, waking up and seeing Natsu asleep beside her would have made her heart soar. But now, it only made her heart sink with guilt. She shook her head. 'What am I doing?' she thought to herself. As quietly and carefully as she could, she rose from the couch, grabbed her shoes, and bolted for the door. 'I'm so sorry, Lisanna. Please forgive me!'

"Natsu!"

Natsu yawned and stretched at the sound of his name. He scratched his stomach and slowly opened one eye. He saw Happy hovering above him. The poor blue Exceed was still clearly upset, for his usual smile was gone. "Good morning, Happy. When did you get home?"

"A little while ago," Happy replied quietly as he floated down to the arm of the couch. "I ended up falling asleep in the guild."

"Why'd you do that?"

"I was trying to cheer myself up with fish and ate too much."

Natsu sat up. "Not surprising that you'd eat yourself into a coma." He looked down, expecting to see Mira still asleep beside him, but was surprised to find the couch empty. "Huh?"

Happy tilted his head. "What is it? You look like you're looking for something."

Natsu blinked. "Yeah, I guess I am," he said softly. He got up and searched the entire house. He opened every door. He lifted piles of clothes. He looked behind the furniture. Mira was gone. "I don't get it. I thought she wanted to stay."

"What are you looking for?" Happy asked. He was following Natsu as he searched.

Natsu shook his head. "It's nothing. Come on, let's go to the guild."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

The two headed for the guild. As they walked, Natsu was deep in thought. 'I hope Mira's there. I want to make sure she's okay.'

"Hey Mira," Elfman mumbled. He was sitting alone at a table inside of the guild. "Where were you last night? You never came home."

Mira sat beside her disheartened brother. "Sorry. I should have come home. Were you okay by yourself?"

He shrugged. "Didn't sleep much. Other than that, I was okay."

"Sorry," Mira whispered as her shoulders began to tremble. "I should have been with you."

Elfman put a hand on her head. "Please don't cry, Mira."

She shook her head as tears began to fall. "I won't."

Elfman began to tear up as well. "Come on, Mira. What do you call that?"

She buried her face in her hands. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay to cry, Mira. You don't have to apologize."

"I'm so sorry," she repeated. 'I betrayed my sister. I abandoned my brother. How could I be so selfish? I'm the worst!'

Elfman wrapped his arms around his sister and held her close.

The doors to the guild opened and in walked Natsu with Happy. He began looking around the guild and spotted Mira sitting with Elfman. 'Good. She's here.' He began walking over to her when Gray stepped in his way.

"You're looking better," Gray said. It was an oddly kind thing for him to say to his enemy.

"Yeah, I'm doing better," Natsu replied with his usual grin.

Erza walked over to the two. "I'm glad. After the way you ran out the other day, I thought you'd be down for a longer period of time." She chuckled. "I should have known better."

Natsu looked at the ceiling. "Lisanna wouldn't want us to be miserable. She'd want us to smile." He smiled gently. 'And I have you to thank for helping me realize that, Mira.'

Erza nodded. "That's a good point."

Natsu pointed off to the side. "I'm gonna check on Mira and Elfman." He then walked over to the two Strauss siblings. "Hey, you two."

Elfman looked over. "Hey Natsu."

Natsu looked towards Mira and tilted his head in confusion. She looked incredibly stiff like she was trying to be invisible. "Hey Mira."

"Hi," she said very softly.

"I just wanted to see how you two were doing."

"Thanks, Natsu," Elfman said, "but I can't exactly say we're great."

"Right." Natsu's eyes returned to Mira's now trembling back. 'It looks like I wasn't able to help her that much after all. She still seems really upset. I was hoping she'd at least be able to smile today. I love it when she smiles.'

Elfman rose from his seat. "I'm going to get some flowers for Lisanna's grave," he said sullenly. "I'll see you guys later." With that he slowly walked out of the guild.

Natsu kept his eyes fixed on Mira. "I was wondering where you went this morning. When did you leave?"

"I don't know," she replied softly. "It was still dark."

He scratched his cheek sheepishly. "I was surprised when I didn't see you this morning. I was a bit disappointed I guess. Weird, huh?"

Mira felt another pain in her chest. "Natsu…"

"Yeah?" he asked.

Mira rose slowly from her seat, but kept her back facing him. "About last night…"

Natsu's head sunk. "Yeah, I know. I wasn't able to help you much after all. I was hoping you'd at least be a little better today, but you're clearly just as sad as before. I'm sorry I couldn't help you. If you want, you can come back today. I'll try to help you again." He blushed slightly as his heart began to beat faster again. "And I…I really enjoyed last ni…"

"Natsu," Mira interrupted, her voice wavering.

"Yeah?"

"Last night was a mistake."

With those words spoken, Natsu was paralyzed. His heart felt like it had hit the floor. His eyes widened as he staggered backwards slightly. "What?"

Mira turned around, but looked at the ground to avoid eye contact. Her expression was sullen and apologetic. "Last night was a mistake. What we did never should have happened."

Natsu's mind was cloudy. "But…it didn't feel like a mistake. I felt better after last night."

Mira bit her bottom lip. "I'm sorry, Natsu, but it was a mistake."

Natsu felt like his body had gone completely numb. 'I don't get this feeling. What is it? I've never felt this before. It…it hurts. I don't like it. Why is she saying these things? And why the hell does it hurt so much in my chest?'

Mira forced herself to meet Natsu's gaze. "I'm sorry, but can we just pretend that nothing happened?"

Natsu didn't understand what happened next; a tear rolled down his face. Without another word, he turned on his heel and rushed out of the guild. He ran and ran and ran as tears rolled down his cheeks. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly. "Damn it! Why the hell am I crying? And why do I feel all broken inside? None of this makes any sense!"

He continued to run until he had made it to the hut where he and Lisanna used to play—the place that now held a small gravestone. He stopped in front of it as the wind whipped his hair and scarf around. He sniffed as more tears continued to roll down his cheeks. He spoke no words because what could he say? He couldn't even understand what was going on inside of him, so verbalizing it was next to impossible. He just stood there, willing the tears to stop in complete silence.

A few hours had passed and Natsu remained by Lisanna's gravestone completely in a trance. It wasn't until a voice came from behind him that he snapped out of it.

"Natsu?" Elfman said. "What are you doing here?"

"Visiting," he rasped without turning around. "What about you? I thought you were visiting Lisanna's grave at the church."

"I did, but I wanted to come here, too," Elfman replied. "This gravestone is just as important to Lisanna's memory as the one in the church." The large Strauss sibling hung his head as yet again tears threatened to fall. "I'm so sorry, Lisanna. It's all my fault you're gone." Tears dripped into the dirt. "My little sister…if only I had let Mirajane take you with us, Natsu, none of this would have happened. She'd still be alive!"

"WOULD YOU SHUT UP?" Natsu roared.

Elfman looked at Natsu in shock. "What?"

"I've had enough of you two blaming yourselves for what happened," Natsu snapped. "So stop blubbering already! I mean really, do you honestly think that Lisanna would want you to carry that guilt around? Hell no!" He clenched his fists. "How's she supposed to smile when her brother's feeling sad?"

Elfman's eyes widened. "You're right, Natsu. You're right."

"No matter what happened, she always had a smile on her face," Natsu continued as his shoulders trembled. "Don't you remember that? Even at the end, she never lost that smile. If she were here now, I'm sure she'd say 'Whenever you're feeling down, that's when you need to smile the most'." Tears collected in his eyes. Without realizing it, he had just told Elfman the same thing that he had told Mira. He turned around and shot Elfman a glare. "So buck up! Show Lisanna a smile like a real man!"

Elfman stood frozen, but then his sorrowful expression showed determination. "A real man, huh?"

Natsu walked off. "I'll see you around."

Elfman stared at his sister's grave before looking at his own hand. He slowly curled his fingers into a fist. "I promise, Lisanna. Your big brother will become a real man so that nothing bad will ever happen again."

As Natsu walked, he gritted his teeth. 'Lisanna's dead and I think Mira hates me now. I can't figure out all of these damn weird feelings. I can't figure out why my chest hurts so much. There's so much that I don't understand. Lisanna, I'm trying my best to smile for you, but…I don't know for how much longer I can.'

The sun was close to setting for the day, bathing Magnolia in an orange light. It was a little before 5 o'clock when Elfman returned to the guild. However, he looked much better than when he left. He walked over to a table where Mira was sitting with Gray, Erza, and Cana.

"Hey there, big guy," Gray greeted. "You seem to be in better spirits."

Elfman nodded and gave a small smile. "Yeah, I feel a little better now."

"What brought about this change?" Cana asked.

"After I went to Lisanna's grave at the church to drop off some flowers, I went by the other grave—you know, the one Natsu put up," Elfman began. "I saw Natsu there and he said something to me."

"What did he say?" Erza inquired.

"He said that I had to smile like a real man so that Lisanna could smile."

Erza smiled softly. "Typical Natsu. He told me earlier that Lisanna wouldn't want us to grieve and we should keep smiling. I have to agree with him. I think that's what she would want."

Elfman nodded. "Yeah. I owe Natsu big time for that."

"Where is he anyway?" Cana asked. "I haven't seen him or Happy in a while."

Elfman shrugged. "Natsu left Lisanna's grave before me and went off somewhere. Happy wasn't with him, though."

"Weird. I wonder where they could have gone," Cana said.

Erza noticed that Mira's gaze was still cast at the floor. She knew her rival and friend was still hurting after the loss of Lisanna, but she was hoping what Elfman had said would make her feel better. "We'll get through this, Mira. Don't worry."

Mira blinked and looked up at Erza. "What? Oh, right. We will."

"Are you alright?" Cana asked.

"You seem more out of it than yesterday. Did something happen?" Gray asked.

Mira shook her head emphatically. "No, nothing happened yesterday."

Erza narrowed her eyes at her. 'Suspicious…'

"HELP! SOMEONE HELP!" Happy cried as he flew in through the guild doors at full speed.

"Happy? Where have you been? What's wrong?" Erza asked.

Happy landed on the table. Tears were flowing down his face even more than yesterday. In his paw he was clutching a piece of paper. The little blue Exceed sniffed. "Erza…what do I do?"

"Happy, what's wrong?" Erza repeated.

Happy straightened out the paper, sniffed once more, and held it out so all could see. "Natsu's gone!"

Okay people. Now's the time that your comments and opinions will determine the future of this story-whether it ends or continues. So please review or PM your thoughts about the story after reading this chapter. Please and thank you! And thank you for reading!