"Hey guys! I was having a little bit of trouble with this chapter but finally figured it out." *Sighs deeply.* "I was going over my other story Jack has a sister and came over some flaws so I did take that story down for whoever read it. I will be re writing it and putting it back up but this story will always be my top priority." *Looks at the snow* "Stupid snow go away. Anyway I hope you all are staying safe and warm. Please enjoy!"
Knockout Starscream -Thank you so much! I will keep updating as often as I can!
sweetredranger -Thank you, sorry I didn't use any of your songs this chapter but please leave more I love listening to music!
CyberQueen1826 -Thank you!
Bibliophile1303 - Yay! I'm glad you are still with us!
Bowser22 -I am so happy to have another reader! I hope you feeling emotional was a good thing if not I am sorry. Have a great week and drive safe! It has been snowing and slick the last few days.
Horses and Giant Robots -Thank you for the songs I love them!
Bee was almost fully recovered thanks to Ratchet and keeping a close optic on the scout, who did not want to stay in medbay, But Anna and Raf kept him company for as long as they were allowed and then Amy would come in and visit with her brother. It was still a little tense around Ironhide but less than it was. Now that her being in ballet class was no longer a secret she was wanting to invite the only bots that were here to Anna and her performance. It was in about a week while her concert was just around the corner.
Today music class was staying late to go through the entire performance one last time before the concert. They had all their costumes in the back dressing rooms and they set up all the lights for tomorrow night. Although Amy was not excited about her outfit she was slightly excited about this concert, it was well-organized thanks to Jazz.
After we went through the entire course we had a meeting sitting on the edge of the stage. It was late everyone was tired, feeling the hours taking their toll.
Amy's Pov...
"That was great! I am super proud of each and every one of you and I cannot wait to blow da roof of displace tomorrow." Jazz spoke standing in front of us. "Tomorrow we need to be early so I want everyone here by 6 no later you can come earlier than dat if you can. But for now, go home and get lots of rest sleep in since its Saturday tomorrow gets well rested and eat well. I will see you all tomorrow." With that we all got up and headed out I waited till it was just Jazz and I standing in this huge room. He was looking at the stage with a thoughtful expression on his face.
"You alright?" I asked him standing close to him.
"Yeah, I was jus' thinkin." He answered glancing at me.
"What about?" He looked back to the stage.
"How great y'all are gonna look up there tomorrow." I reached over and squeezed his hand once before pulling my hand back. He smiled at me. "Let's head back ta base."
When we pulled into base Ratchet was waiting.
"Hey, Ratchet what's up?" I greeted trying not to let the panic I felt in my head show on my face.
"I was wanting to talk with you." He kneeled down and offered a servo. I walked over and stepped onto it, he stood and walked into med bay. When he got into med bay he sat at his desk setting me down on it. "How are you feeling?" He asked. I frowned.
"I'm alright. How are you?" I replied he seemed to be trying to read me with my body language and facial expression. I tried to remain still and calm. His optics bore into me making me feel like he knew.
"Are you sure?" He asked after a long moment. He was asking to see if I would tell him, I didn't think he knew specifically what he wanted me to say but he knew something was up. I looked away. "Does this have to do with you not wanting me to scan you?" A swallowed hard biting my lip. His servos wrapped around me pulling me close to his chassis. "You know you can come to me about anything don't you?" His voice was worried. I hesitated but nodded once. "I am worried about you my spark. I do not want anything to happen to you." He murmured lifting me to his faceplates. That made my face fall, he was worried about me I could tell, and he wanted to help but wasn't going to push me.
I wrapped my arms around his faceplates not wanting to be stared at anymore and just wanting him to hold me. Just this once all I wanted was to feel safe and Ratchet provided that, he held me for a long time no more words were exchanged.
After a while Ratchet let me down so I could go do my homework, I felt bad for not telling him but how could I? I did not want to see his face when he found out if he ever does. When I got to dads room I noticed Ironhide's truck was sitting there he was probably in our room. When I walked in he had Anna on his lap helping her with her homework. I frowned slightly but didn't react as I went to my desk.
"Hey, Amy." Anna greeted. I looked at her gave a small smile and nod before turning to my studies. How did I feel about Hide holding my little girl? Was I jealous? No, I wasn't. Was I afraid? I was afraid he would hurt her. She seemed happy to be with him. Since dad wasn't here Ratchet and Hide stepped up to take up the male role of the house. I still wasn't sure what a dad did. I guess I will look it up later tonight after Anna goes to sleep.
While I was doing the last bit of my homework Anna had gotten up and came over to stand beside my desk. Not looking up I spoke.
"Yes, Anna?" I asked. She didn't say anything so I stopped what I was doing setting my pen down I looked up at her so she would have my full attention. She was playing with her fingers with a thoughtful expression on her face. "Anna? What is it?"
"I was wondering about tomorrow night after the concert..." She trailed off. Okay from that short sentence she was wanting to do something after the concert. I gave a quick glance to Ironhide who was watching us he looked just as curious as I felt.
"What about after the concert? Did you want to do something?" I asked. She looked at me and nodded.
"I was wondering if we could have Miko over for a sleepover and do fun stuff." She mumbled the last part but I heard her. I blinked she had never asked me to have someone over for a sleepover. I sat back in my chair folding my arms and looked over my little sister regarding her with a thoughtful expression.
"What fun stuff did you have in mind?" I asked her. "I'll need to know so I can pick up the supplies when I go to the store." The biggest smile broke over her face and she threw her arms around my neck.
"Thank you!" She giggled. I held her tightly for a moment before letting her go.
"So write down a list of anything you want and need and then I'll go to the store," I told her she nodded and went to her desk to write it all down while I went back to finish my homework. After a moment a list was placed by my hand before Anna ran out calling.
"Thank you so much I love you!" She ran off leaving me to my homework and I think Ironhide was still in here. I heard him walk behind me.
"How's the homework coming along?" He asked placing his hands on the back of my chair leaning over my shoulder to look at my papers.
"Almost done," I muttered trying not to focus on him so I could finish it. After 10 minutes I was done and packed it up into my backpack. His hands landed on my shoulders stopping me from getting up. I tensed but didn't say anything I figured he wanted to talk.
"You're a really nice sister." He spoke. I tilted my head back to look up at him before resting my elbows on my desk and placing my head in my hands.
"I wish Hide," I mumbled. His hands gently squeezed my shoulders.
"You are. You did a good job with her. She is growing up to be a beautiful young woman such as yourself." I shook my head.
"No, not like me Hide, She looks just like mom and she will grow up to be just as beautiful as our mom. I wasn't so lucky." As soon as the words left my mouth Hide's grip tightened and he spun me and my chair around to face him. I held my breath not out of fear but just out of habit my eyes locked with his. His gaze was stern and slightly harsh, I dropped my eyes not wanting to be stuck under his gaze.
"Amy, you are a beautiful..."
"I don't believe that." I interrupted him gently. "I never have, Hide. It's not easy to believe something that was just used as something for satisfaction is beautiful. I got my looks from 'him' I didn't get moms beautiful features." He frowned deeply and stayed quiet for a moment his eyes seemed to dim slightly for a minute before lighting up again and a few seconds later the door opened and Jazz walked in with a frown on his face.
"I think its time fer a dance." Jazz spoke as Hide stepped back from me. I raised an eyebrow at him confused. He smirked before reaching for my laptop. He opened it and pulled a song up before taking my hand. I swallowed hard as he pulled me up close to him. "Relax sweet spark. Its jus' you an me." He spoke softly as the song started.
Jonny Diaz-More Beautiful you lyrics (Requested by Horses and Giant Robots.)
Little girl fourteen flipping through a magazine
Says she wants to look that way
But her hair isn't straight, her body isn't fake
And she's always felt overweight
Well, little girl fourteen I wish that you could see
That beauty is within your heart
And you were made with such care, your skin, your body, and your hair
Are perfect just the way they are
I was 16 but I don't think that's what he wants me to see. I never really thought about looking different I just knew I wasn't that pretty, On the outside and the inside I was a rather dark person. Jazz gently traced a finger over my back where his hand held me close to him, gaining my attention. I looked up at him. He started singing along with the music as he leads me in a slow sway around the room.
There could never be a more beautiful you
Don't buy the lies, disguises, and hoops, they make you jump through
You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do
So there could never be a more beautiful you
He's saying I'm beautiful? Saying I'm not is lies? I couldn't be lying to myself about this... Could I? I mean what's so beautiful about me? My personality is a mess, I get into fights sometimes at school, I'm mean and secretive. What is beautiful about me?
Little girl twenty one the things that you've already done
Anything to get ahead
And you say you've got a man but He's got another plan
Only wants what you will do instead
Well, little girl twenty one you never thought that this would come
You starve yourself to play the part
But I can promise you there's a man whose love is true
And He'll treat you like the jewel you are
I looked away from him at the thought of 'them' and what they wanted and what they took. Do I starve myself though? I eat sometimes with Anna. So I at least don't starve myself physically. Emotionally? I tell myself the truth.
There could never be a more beautiful you
Don't buy the lies, disguises, and hoops, they make you jump through
You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do
So there could never be a more beautiful you, more beautiful you
So turn around you're not too far
To back away be who you are
To change your path go another way
It's not too late, you can be saved
If you feel depressed with past regrets
The shameful nights hope to forget
Can disappear, they can all be washed away
Can I really be saved from drowning in the past that keeps pulling me down? All those nights and days I felt shame as they... I want to forget but how can I when they permanently scared my skin?
By the one who's strong, can right your wrongs
Can rid your fears dry, all your tears
And change the way you look at this big world
He will take your dark distorted view
And with His light, He will show you truth
And again you'll see through the eyes of a little girl
That there could never be a more beautiful you
Don't buy the lies, disguises, and hoops, they make you jump through
You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do
So there could never be a more beautiful you
There could never be a more beautiful you]
Am I really that beautiful that Ironhide would call Jazz just to do this for me? Am I really worth that?
"Amy, Ya are so beautiful ya don't even know it! Dat's part of what makes ya so perfect! Ya don't brag about it you don't try to hard fer it you just act like yerself, ya are kind, protective, and gentle, and dat's all ya need ta do ta be beautiful." Jazz explained. I frowned as I thought about it. Am I kind? Maybe to Anna and Raf but nobody else. I am defiantly protective. Gentle? Only with Anna and Raf everyone else I'm usually rough with. "You are beautiful." Jazz spoke again making me look up at him, only then did I realize I was still in his hold with his hand on my back his other holding my hand, and my other hand on his arm. I frowned I wasn't reacting the way I normally do.
"You are doing good Amy." Hide spoke from where he sat on my bed. I looked from Jazz to Hide. I was being held closely by an adult male and I was not freaking out.
"Yeah, thanks but I think I'm good now," I said pulling away from Jazz, not harshly, He pulled his hands back.
"Ya did good, Amy, ya didn't freak out dat's good. It's progress." Jazz told me. I nodded to him. "Anyway, you are very beautiful. Okay?" I shrugged at him.
"If you say so," I replied. I really didn't care never did care how I looked you can't change it if you do then its fake and its not the real deal. Ironhide stood and walked up beside Jazz.
"We do and Prime would agree with us." I looked away. Did I miss him why wasn't he home yet?
"I'll work on it hows that?" I told them. They nodded and left it at that. "Anyway, I need to go to the store," I said picking up the list Anna left fo me along with my phone and wallet.
"I'll take you." Hide spoke. I raised an eyebrow at him.
"You know I do have my bike right?" He paused for a second.
"May I take you?" I rolled my eyes.
"I guess if you really want to." He smirked and let his holo form disappear along with Jazz. I walked out of my room as Hide finished transforming, he offered a servo which I climbed onto. He then stood and headed for the main room.
"Are you ready for your concert tomorrow?" He spoke after a minute. I frowned slightly and leaned into him.
"I guess as ready as I'll ever be. I just wish dad was back to see it." I mumbled the last part but he heard it. He rubbed a digit over my arm in silent comfort. When we got to the main room Anna and Raf were nowhere to be seen but they were probably off with Bee somewhere. So I shrugged it off. Hide set me down before transforming. I climbed into the passenger seat and we headed off to the store.
When we pulled into the parking lot he activated his holoform.
"You don't have to come in you know," I told him. He gave me a look.
"I do not want to let you out of my sight, someone could jump you." He replied. I sighed and got out. He followed a second later and followed me into the store. It wasn't fancy but it had what I needed so I grabbed a basket and headed for them, as I called it, girly section. I grabbed a new brush for Anna along with new cute hair ties and headbands. Then I picked out several colors of nail polish and face mask things they weren't on her list but they seemed like something she would like to try so I grabbed a few.
"What is all this?" Hide asked looking at the nail polish.
"Its paint for your fingernails," I told him. He gave a very confused face and I couldn't help but let a small laugh out, He noticed and smiled, I coughed into my hand and walked to the next item, snacks. I picked up some Doritos, gummy bears, and some chocolate bars, along with juice packs. I noticed out of the corner of my eye a couple boys looking at me with weird expressions not wanting to cause a scene here and now I grabbed Ironhide's arm. He seemed to immediately be on guard must be some unspoken agreement of ours, but he immediately started walking with me to the cashier.
"You okay?" He spoke quietly as I unloaded my basket. I gave a stiff nod. The lady smiled at me as she rang up the items and before I could pull out my cash Ironhide swiped a credit card I gave him a look of unbelief especially when it was approved. He gave a grin before taking the bags and my hand and leaving the store while keeping his guard up. When we got to his truck I really didn't want to let go of his hand but he released mine allowing me to climb in. When he got in he looked at me. "What made you tense up in the store?" He asked. I looked at him before looking out the window.
"Just some boys, they were giving me these... looks and it just made me uncomfortable, So I..." I trailed off looking down. I felt his hand gently take mine in his own, slowly I looked over to him. He had a happy concerned expression on his face from what I could tell.
"I will keep you safe." He stated it like it was a true fact with no questions. I nodded and held his hand with both of mine not wanting to let go. He smiled slightly and drove off to the base.
later that night... Amy's Pov...
It was really late but I could not sleep tossing and turning in my bed. Finally, I decided I didn't want a chance of waking Anna up so I got up, grabbed my violin and headed to the main room, my destination was on top of the silo but Ratchet was still in the main room at the computer.
"Amy?" He looked over as I walked up to the platform.
"Hey, Ratchet, sorry I couldn't sleep so I was gonna go up top to play," I explained. He looked me over, all I was wearing were my black sleep shorts and my black hoodie. He offered a servo silently, I climbed on holding my violin and he walked off to the bot sized elevator and went up to the top. He stepped out looking around it was quiet and dark besides the stars and the moon shining in the sky. He kneeled down lowering his servo allowing me to slide off. I looked up at him and he had a tired and worried look on his faceplates. He then went over and sat by the ledge and just sat there. I bit my lip for a moment before positioning my violin properly and with Boulevard of Broken Dreams - Lindsey Stirling (Green Day Cover) not singing as I played I slowly moved my body as I played closing my eyes tightly just letting the music flow.
When I was finished I glanced at Ratchet he had turned so he could see me and had been watching.
"Are you okay Ratchet?" I asked. He frowned and vented out.
"Will you play something else? For me?" He asked softly. I nodded and pulled the bow across the strings and sang out.
SHATTER ME - Lindsey Stirling (Requested by Knockout Starscream.)
I pirouette in the dark
I see the stars through me
Tired mechanical heart
Beats til the song disappears
Somebody shine a light
I'm frozen by the fear in me
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me
So cut me from the line
Dizzy, spinning endlessly
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!
Shatter me!
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!
I danced as I played letting the music lead me through the steps. I wanted to feel alive, I wanted to be able to live without fear, without the need for pain. I wanted someone to shatter me then help me back up all put together.
If only the clockworks could speak
I wouldn't be so alone
We burn every magnet and spring
And spiral into the unknown
Somebody shine a light
I'm frozen by the fear in me
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me
So cut me from the line
Dizzy, spinning endlessly
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!
Shatter me!
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!
I am very familiar with the unknown, although I wish I wasn't. I was frozen in fear but it won't hold me, I don't want it to, I want to let it loose and tell it goodbye. Won't someone shatter me so I lose everything I don't want to hold onto?
If I break the glass, then I'll have to fly
There's no one to catch me if I take a dive
I'm scared of changing, the days stay the same
The world is spinning but only in gray
If I break the glass, then I'll have to fly
There's no one to catch me if I take a dive
I'm scared of changing, the days stay the same
The world is spinning but only in gray
If the glass breaks, if I break, then I will be forced to fly. Is that what I really want? Is there someone there to catch me if I take that dive? Or will I fall into the depth to live in darkness till the day I die? If I change will the days stay the same? I want to change I don't want to be this way anymore, but old habits die hard, very hard. The world keeps spinning in circles around me but all I see is gray, Where did all the color go? I want the color back. I want my life back.
Somebody shine a light
I'm frozen by the fear in me
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me
So cut me from the line
Dizzy, spinning endlessly
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!
Shatter me!
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!
I wanted someone to shine a light for me, I wanted to let go of this fear inside of me and take hold of something, anything else just let this fear go! I want to feel alive. I ended the song breathing deeply. I looked over to see Ratchet looking at me. I walked over setting my violin down before he picked me up and cradled me above his spark he rubbed a digit over my arm. I looked up at him and saw the look on his faceplates and then I knew, he knew. I looked down frowning deeply I wanted to run to hide something. I didn't know how he figured it out but he did.
"Sweetspark, I can't lose you. I-I can't." His voice trembled at the end. I stood in his servo and reached up to his faceplates, he brought me up to his faceplates allowing my arms to wrap around as much as I could. He nuzzled into me and just held me. "I-I know it's hard. I know it hurts my spark. Please just come to me. I can't lose you." He held me slightly tighter.
"Ratchet how did you..?" I trailed off but kept my voice quiet. He pulled me back slightly so he could look me in the eyes.
"Dear spark, I noticed the signs, you didn't want me to scan you, you keep wearing your hoodies more so than before. I looked up the signs my spark. I know it hurts, believes me I do I went through pain too. I-I just... I can't lose you." He paused looking into my eyes deeply.
"I love you, my spark."
Random question, What is your opinion on butterfly kisses? Let me know in the reviews.