A/N: I decided to spoil y'all again! Since the new episodes aren't obviously coming out any time soon, I decided to post (drum roll please)… THE FIREBENDING MASTERS!!! YAY! But I must warn you, may spoilers lie beyond this point! And for those of you waiting for that new chapter of Separated We Are, I am SO sorry for not getting that out! I will, I promise! ...eventually!
By the way, I am SOOO happy! 98 reviews! ONLY 2 MORE, GUYS, ONLY 2!!! So, I want to thank all my reviewers for doing such a great job! Seriously, y'all are great! I would ALSO like to thank them for not flaming me! YAY FOR FIRE EXTINGUISHERS!!! And so, without further ado, here is Sokka's latest entry! …But first the disclaimer!
Zuko: Hey, Zuko here –
Me: -busts out laughing-
Zuko: What?!
Me: -calms down- n-nothing, nothing. You were saying?
Zuko: Hey, Zuko here to say –
Me: -busts out laughing… again-
Zuko: -getting angry- and just what is so funny?!
Me: -in-between laughs- Wh-who said anything was f-funny?
Zuko: Well, you're laughing!
Me: I-I'm not laughing! W-what would give you th-that idea? I'm just-just… exercising my v-vocal cords!
Zuko: Well, would you stop?
Me: -calms down- Okay, okay, I'm good. Go on.
Zuko: Hey, Zuko here –
Me: -trying to hold in laughter-
Zuko: -glaring at me- Zuko here –
Me: -trying to hold in more laughter-
Zuko: -still glaring- here –
Me: -busts out laughing AGAIN-
Zuko: -really angry- TANGY DOESN'T OWN AVATAR!! AND NOW, I AM SO OUT OF HERE!!!
Thus ends what may be the longest, most pointless disclaimer ever.
Sokka's Diary
Entry 11
Well, today, I learned many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many things about firebending. Like, if you're not careful, it will CHEW YOU UP AND SPIT YOU OUT LIKE AN ANGRY KOMODO RHINO!
…Eww…
I also learned that I STILL GOT IT! See, Zuko and Aang were practicing their firebending, right? And I go over to them and say, "Hey you jerks. Mind if I watch you two jerks do your jerkbending?" Jerkbending. HA! I crack myself up! And it proves that I still got the stuff!
…Don't ask me what stuff, coz I don't know either.
But you probably want to actually hear the story, right? SIGH, yup, I thought you'd say that. Now I have to exert energy telling a story. CURSE YOU STORY LOVERS!!!
Well, anyways, Zuko was saying that he lost his 'stuff' –
Does he have the same stuff I have? Maybe he can tell me what the heck it is –
And Toph was all, "I DIDN'T TAKE IT!"
…Maybe that's where my boomerang went…
…and my sword…
…and my bag of seal jerky…
…and my maps…
…and my dignity…
Come to think of it, I couldn't find this dia-JOURNAL for a while! Hmm… something in my brain is telling me that's why Mike and Brian weren't able to post the latest episodes on TV.
Who are Mike and Brian, though?
And what's an episode?
And what's a TV?
The questions that haunt me…
But BACK TO THE STORY! Zuko said he lost his firebending powers! GASP! BEST DAY EVER!
You know, for me. Not him. Coz for him, it kinda sucks.
Kinda.
And then Katara started laughing at the irony of it all. You have to admit, it WOULD have been nice if Zuko had lost his firebending while he was hunting to kill us all, capture Aang, and destroy all world hope.
Then Zuko said he hadn't lost it, which made me sad, he said it was just a lot weaker.
Then Katara TOTALLY burned him when she was all, "Maybe you're just not as good as you think you are."
Ouch. The firebender just got burned!
I'm proud to say that Katara is MY little sister.
Sometimes.
So Zuko and Aang came up with the theory that Zuko's firebending came from his anger, and since he wasn't angry anymore, that was why he couldn't firebend.
Which meant it was time for… SOKKA THE IDEA GUY! Coming up with plans to save the world!
So, since it's INCREDIBLY easy to make Zuko angry, I came up with the idea to… poke him with a stick! Genius, right? AND it's pretty fun!
It DID get him angry, but he does this weird thing where he holds his nose to stop his anger from getting out of control.
PARTY POOPER!
Zuko decided he didn't want his firebending to be fueled by anger, anyways. So Toph said that he should try to go to the original source of firebending and learn from that.
I honestly hoped beyond hope that that meant Zuko had to jump in a volcano. Coz that would be AWESOME and it would TOTALLY make my day!
But not Zuko's. Coz that would kinda suck. For him. Kinda.
Toph told us she learned from the original source of earthbending. When she was little, she ran off one day and wandered into a cave where the badgermoles taught her earthbending. It's not as cool as MY story of how I learned how to use my boomerang, but…
Okay, there is no story of how I learned to use it. One of the warriors dropped and left it in the snow when they were leaving with my dad to fight. I found it, picked it up, and just chucked the thing over my shoulder. Unfortunately, that's when I learned that it could come back.
I still have the scar, if you want to see it! It's really cool! It looks like a turtle duck on a unicycle doing a handstand while eating a grilled cheese sandwich in the middle of summer near a mountain range! Katara says it only looks like a lima bean, but who's the smart one here?
Please, PLEASE don't answer that.
So Zuko was sad coz the original source of firebending were dragons, and they're extinct.
HA HA! Sucks for Zuko!
But then he said that some people called the Sun Warriors were really good firebenders, even though they're dead, and that where they lived wasn't too far from the Western Air Temple. Then Aang quoted some kind of proverb the monks said, something about poor electrical lighting. I'm not sure.
But seriously, what do Zuko and Aang expect? That they're just going to go to where the Sun Warriors used to live and just magically know how to firebend the right way just by being in the presence of where they once stood? Just?!
So, Aang and Zuko a.k.a. the jerks left me here with the very mean blind earthbender, my nagging, waterbending sister, a lemur that always steals people's food, a freakishly mustached guy, a short dude who thinks he deserves some kind of fancy title with the word 'the' at the beginning, and a crippled mechanist who is nowhere near as cool as his dad.
WHY ME?!
So, when they got back, they told us what happened at the… whatever place they went to, I wasn't really paying close attention. I was too busy watching this butter-bee fly around. It was so cute, with its stripes on its body and the big, pretty, colorful, elaborate (OOH! Big word!) wings, and its very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very big stinger.
You can just imagine how this ended.
Apparently, there were lots of booby traps. When they mentioned this, Aang kept going on about how the past was trying to kill him…
No idea.
Then Zuko had told Aang how Fire Lord Sozin started a tradition of dragon hunting for glory, and if you were able to conquer one, you would earn the title, 'dragon', and the person to kill the very last dragon was his uncle, Iroh.
I miss that guy. He made good tea. Aw, now I'm hungry…
They came to some kind of temple where you could only open the door when the light hit the big red stone at the right angle, so Zuko did some kind of freaky, reflect-light-off-sword-to-fool-red-rock-that-it's-the-solstice trick to open the door.
I could have done that…
Then they went into the room and Aang was all, "Zuko, I want you to dance with me!"
AWKWARD!
But it turns out they were just following the statues movements. Apparently, they were 'learning'. Yeah right, no matter what they say, it's a DANCE!
Omigosh, I can just picture Zuko as a dancing ballerina! Hee hee! …oh, oh, EWW! EEEWWWWW!!!
Never picture Zuko in dancing tights and leotards! NOT pretty!
When they were done, they made some kind of glowing egg appear.
I wonder if glowing eggs would make a good breakfast…
It was when they got to this part that I learned Aang is very suspicious of giant, glowing eggs sitting on pedestals. Who knew?
But ZUKO, being the tremendous (another big word there) IDIOT he is, picked up the egg, made some kind of green glue/goo/goop fill up the locked room they were in, and they both got stuck to the ceiling.
Geniuses, right?
Eventually, some people came along. It was the LEADER OF THE SUN WARRIORS!! DUN DUN DUUUNNNN!!!!
The guy took them to a whole tribe of people. Who knew they were all secretly alive? There, they had some weird animals clean off that gunk glue stuff. They explained their story, and the leader said that if the masters, something and something, I forgot their names, deemed (Cool! I didn't even know I knew that word!) them worthy, they would teach them firebending. If not, they would be destroyed on the spot!
GASP! Not my buddy Aang! They can destroy Zuko all they want. Heck, they could eat him or torture him, I wouldn't care, just DON'T HURT MY LITTLE BUDDY AANG!!
So Aang and Zuko agreed to the terms, and the weird warrior guys (not that there's anything WRONG with warriors) told them they had to go up this mountain thing with and eternal flame, and if it went out… I'm not really sure what would happen if it went out, BUT it was supposed to show commitment or something, so I GUESS it was important.
Eventually, they made it up the cliff and to this place where the masters were supposed to be, and the WHOLE TRIBE was already there!
How they got there so quickly, the world may never know…
Zuko and Aang walked up these step thingies and 'presented their fire'. But Aang started shaking and his fire went out.
Wimp.
So Aang tried to take some of Zuko's fire, but eventually, Zuko's went out too, coz they were fighting! GASP!
And then, THE BEAR ATTACKED!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Wait, wrong story.
And then, THE MASTERS CAME OUT! But here's where the bizarre twist comes in. The masters were dragons!
Some great guy Iroh was, he was supposed to have killed off all of them! If he's so strong, why didn't he?! THE TRUTH HAS COME OUT!
Aang suggested that they do that weird dance thingy. How on earth he thought to do THAT in the situation, I have absolutely NO clue! But when do I ever?
…wait…
So they did that, and the dragons shot colorful fire at them!
YAY COLORS! Boo fire! BUT COLORS ARE COOL! Fire sucks!
Then the leader guy said that Iroh was the last one to face the masters and learn their secrets. That's why he told everybody he killed the last dragons. To protect them.
Oooohhhh… my bad.
And then, AANG FIREBENDED!!! Or would it be firebent? Firebended, firebent, firebended, firebent, same difference, MOVING ON!
And so, now that they knew how to do that whole thing with the fire, they came back here and told us all this, then showed us their weird, dance thingy. Zuko got real defensive and was all, "Blah, blah, blah, technique, blah, blah, blah, thousands of years old, blah, blah, blah, not a dance!"
But I was on a roll with this whole –dissing-and-getting-on-Zuko's-nerves thing, so I was all, "Yeah, we'll just tap dance our way to victory over the Fire Lord."
Dang, who knew I was so good at this stuff?
Then Katara decided to burn the firebender again and asked what their not-a-dance was called.
Turns out it's called the 'dancing dragon'! HA! IN YOUR FACE ZUKO! It is SO a dance! Booyah!
And that was about it. I'm still hungry. So I guess I'll just go. So bye. See you. I guess.
The always manly and MUCH better than Zuko,
Sokka
A/N: Ta-dah! There you have it! I had to watch the episode while writing this, coz I had kinda forgotten all the little details in the episode. But it's here! So… yeah. YAY!
REVIEW OR YOU WILL BE FED TO MY NEW TEDDY BEAR!
Nah, JK, my teddy bear came with those little heart candies, so it's too full of those to eat all of you! So…
REVIEW OR I'LL GET MY FELLOW NINJAS TO THROW MUFFINS AT YOU! Yeah, that's right, I'm a ninja that has access to muffins…But you don't know that.
Tangy