Burned Bridges Chapter 10

"Burned Bridges"

Randy's POV

Right now I'm being interrogated by the fire chief about the fire in the bathroom. Obviously I have to deny starting the fire.

'So do you know the name of the person who started this fire?' the fire chief asks me.

'Yes, it was Torii McDonald. He's…' I start to say "He's part of Zoran's gang, but then stop. After all, I'm from Detroit, Michigan. How the hell do I know Zoran and her gang and all her doings?

'He's what?' Chief Mike Johnson asks. I was hoping he wouldn't catch that last part.

'He's probably done something like this before' I say, telling a partial lie.

'Excuse me, chief. We found a couple things of interest in the restroom. For one, there was three knives stabbed into the stall right to the left of where the fire was started. But we also found this' one of the firemen says. I look at the object he was talking about.

Son of a bitch.

He's holding Andre's blue cigarette lighter. It must've fallen out of my pocket when I made my escape. Then I realize that I must have a look of horror on my face. I try to readjust to a casual look as quick as possible.

'Get it and the knives over to the crime lab for prints' Chief Johnson instructs.

'Well, I guess that's all for now. If we need anything else, we'll track you down' the chief tells me. I get up, and walk over to where mom and dad are waiting for me.

'What's the matter Randy? You look like you saw a ghost over there' mom asks.

'I don't know. I just kind of have this funny feeling right now. I just can't help but think I'm somehow related to all these fires started lately' I say.

'Oh, you're probably just nervous about seeing Mark. He did take what you did really hard. Speaking of which, he's out of surgery now, and we can go see him in about an hour's time' mom says.

An Hour and a Half Later

Randy's POV

Mark's doing better apparently. Right now a nurse is trying to wake him up.

'Mom, dad, I'm going to go wait out of sight, and I'll let you tell Mark that I'm here. I don't want to upset him anymore than what I probably will' I say. They just nod their heads. I wonder if they even comprehended what I just said. Not that I blame them. I'm worried about Mark too. I take a few steps around a corner of the hospital room, and stand flat up against the wall.

'Mark, sweetie, how do you feel?' mom asks. I don't hear a reply, so I sneak a glance over in that general direction, and see Mark shrug, or at least attempt to.

'We have a bit of a surprise for you Mark. We was going to call you and let you know, but we didn't get the chance to before all this happened. A few days ago, Randy showed up at your mom's office' dad explains. At my name, Mark's eyes snap wide open, and I can see that he still has the fire inside about what happened after all these years. I figure that this is as good a time as any to make my presence known to Mark.

As soon as I step out into the open, Mark gets wide eyed and starts motioning for me to leave.

'Get away from me. I don't want to see you' Mark struggles to say, but nonetheless says.

'Now Mark, your brother has been a nervous wreck about you just like your father and I have been. You could at least give him the chance to apologize' mom scolds.

'Why would he apologize? Have you forgotten who you're talking about?' Mark asks.

'Mom, dad, could you two step outside for a minute? I want to say something to Mark in private. It'll only take a minute or so' I say. Mark has a bewildered look on his face, but says nothing.

'Calm down, it's not like I'm going to kill you. Listen Mark, there's no excuse for what happened, and I don't by any means expect an apology to simply make things better between us. But the reason I'm here is because I seriously fucked up seven years ago. There's no denying that' I say.

'Yeah, and it's your fault I'm here. But you already know that, and I don't want you to ever forget' Mark whispers.

'Yes, it is my fault you're here right now. Zoran, or you'd know her by the name Shelly, did this to lure me out here and kill me' I explain.

'Damn. She obviously hasn't succeeded yet' Mark comments.

'Could you just explain one thing to me? Before the fire started, the person who was in my apartment said "this is all because of your fag brother". Does that mean what I think it means Randy?' he asks, using my name for the first time in several years.

'I don't know what you're thinking, but my guess would be yes' I answer.

'So that's why…that's why you did all that you did when we were kids' Mark says, making me sound like a pedophile. (Which, for the record, I am not).

'Honestly, I don't know. May-' I get cut off.

'That's bullshit. It is or it isn't why. You do know something' he says.

'Maybe some of those things were…not enjoyable or satisfactory or any kind of word like that, but maybe like the meaning of those words. These feelings didn't really surface until after Costa Rica. It's definitely who I am, it's not something that happens over time. Maybe we all are a little homosexual, and it just lays dormant in most people, or if it doesn't, they just never let on about it.' I say, struggling to find the right words.

'Enough of your "maybes" and "I don't knows"' Mark says.

'What, if I say that yes, yes that's why I bullied you and that I enjoyed every second of being around you in a non-brotherly manner, then things will be automatically healed over between us? I'm not going to sit here and lie Mark. All I can say is that if- No, let me put this in definitive terms. All I can say is that before Costa Rica, I never thought once about me being gay. I don't know if Lauren or Zoran or Andre or the whole damn thing did this to me, but something happened over in Costa Rica that changed much more of me than just the surface. It changed the very being of who I am. And believe me, there are mornings when I wake up and can't stand the person I've become. You want to know why I came home? This is why' I say. I lift up my shirt at the end of spiel, and there on my stomach is a small red cut.

'What's that?' Mark asks, knowing good and well what it is, but wanting me to confess to him.

'It's a scar from when I started to cut my stomach so I could kill myself. I hit something more than my stomach when I tried to do this. As soon as the knife got this far, I stopped. I knew that there was only one road back to redemption for me, and it certainly didn't involve a knife stolen from the local steakhouse me and my gang terrorized constantly. That's why that night I went to see mom' I explain.

'But why did you do that?' he asks.

'Because my life had no meaning left to it. I was sick of who I had become, what I was' I say.

'You mean a homos-' he starts to say, but I cut him off.

'No, I mean a gang boss, someone who ordered for people to be killed like you would order breakfast. Someone who lived simply to not die, and to cause others to die. I still don't like who I am. I still feel like there is a part of the gang boss left in me, and it's scaring the hell out of me because I don't know, if, when, or where it will decide to show up' I say.

'Randy, I still don't forgive you for anything. I'll try, but it's going to be hard. As far as I'm concerned, nothing has changed since before we had this discussion' Mark says.

'Good. Trying to make up with you will give me something challenging to do' I say. He semi-smiles at this.

'With all that being said, I think it's time we let mom and dad back in' I say, walking over to the door.

A/N: I want to start by saying I didn't mean to give away the information about what happened leading up to Randy coming home, but it just kind of slipped out somehow. Oh well.

So now we know Mark will live, but will Randy be able to stay a free man after the police find out what he did in that restroom? All I'll say is: Be sure to watch out for a few appearances by Jonathan Taylor Thomas in one form or another.

On a final note, I really, honestly did not mean to present Randy as being a pedophile in this chapter when Mark said what he said. It kind of turned out that way, which is why I put in that comment about Randy not being a pedophile. The kind of things I/Mark was talking about was just typical stuff that older brothers do to younger brothers. (Not that I would know this since I don't have a younger brother or sister). So no, Randy is not a pedophile.

Sorry it took me so long to update this story, but as I said earlier today when I updated Nine Months of Hell, it seemed like something was always happening to prevent me from being able to write.

Please R&R, and thanks for reading.

-Yours truly, Randy Taylor