Chapter Ten – Suffer The Little Children

I know a place where no one's lost,

I know a place where no one cries

Crying at all is not allowed,

Not in my castle on a cloud

Chasity Morgan – Mother of little Sophie Morgan – District Nine

I couldn't bring myself to tell my daughter the truth. For once, I wanted her to have a good night, one free of nightmares of her own demise. We all know that this is, in it's own way, for the best, but I can't help but feel sick to my core about it. After all, I am her mother. I am supposed to protect her from all that is out to get her in this insane world we are forced to live in, but if I can't protect her from the disease that is slowly, but surely killing her, I may as well end her suffering. It's the very least I can do for my only child. But then, who will be there to end my suffering when the time comes?

My heart breaks as I dress her in a simple white dress, the same dress that I once wore to my first Reaping. Unlike my daughter, it had brought me luck and I made it through all seven of my Reapings, while she will be forced into her very first one. She smiles at me as I straighten her dress out.

"Don't be sad, Mama."

A lump wells up in my throat. "I'm not sad, baby. I'm just scared for you, that's all."

"Because District Nine has to chose their tributes?" Her brown eyes are large and questioning, like that of a kitten. "Don't worry about me, Mama. The people in town always smile at me and give me sweets. I doubt they will choose me."

Oh, my poor angel. If only she knew.

We finish getting ready in silence, it is the only way I could make it through the rest of the day without breaking down. I can't help but feel like the worst parent in all of Panem, even worse than those parents that allow their sons and daughters to train for the right to enter the games. At least their children stand a fighting chance, while my little girl is ripe for the slaughter and will be gone within moments of the Bloodbath, I just know it. At least then, she may not suffer. At least another family in District Nine can hold their daughter a little closer tonight, knowing she will be safe for another year to come.

The town square is packing, slowly but surely, and I quickly whisk my daughter to the Peacekeepers in charge of collecting the blood and information on each child of the Grain District. After her finger is pricked, she holds it up for me to see and smiles away.

"That didn't hurt, Mama. The doctors do way worse things to me."

I fake a smile back to her. "I'll see you when the Reaping is over. I love you, my little sun and stars."

"I love you too, Mama."

Tears flow as I watch the only thing I have remaining in my life walk to her certain death with a smile spread across her face. It takes everything in me not to run for her, to snatch her away and keep her all to myself. She is my light, my angel, my reason for being. And now, she will be gone from my world forever, remember as just another casualty of the Games. She turns and waves one last time and I blow her a kiss before she is lost among the other twelve year old girls, lost to me forever.

A neighbor grabs me and leads me to where the other adults are waiting. She allows me to sob on her shoulder as the ceremony is underway. Everything around me is background noise and my mind only centers on her, just as it always does. Her father left us after she was first discovered to be so sickly that we should give up on her. Instead, he gave up on us and left the burden of raising a sick and dying child squarely on my shoulders, but I couldn't have cared less. She was my miracle child, the one the doctors swore I would never have, and I refused to give up on her. But as the years drifted on and the bills piled up, she only became worse and worse and finally, I knew I had start preparing for the worst. And then, the Quarter Quell was announced and the same neighbor that allowed me to soak her dress gave us all the idea of sending her into the Games.

"Would you rather her suffer slowly here at home, or have the chance to die quickly in the place of another District Nine child?"

And so, her name was sent into Games and my life and soul went with it. I am a shell now; a non-person. Without her in my life, I have nothing.

"SOPHIE MORGAN!"

And there she goes. I watch as she beings to panic and is carried on stage by a Peacekeeper, one I recognize as Dixon, the man that always has some candy to brighten Sophie's smile with on our way home from her doctor's visits. Even behind the mask, I can tell he is crying. No one in the District utters a word.

"MAMA! NO, MAMA!"

She beings to hyperventilate, which throws her into a full-on coughing fit. Right before my eyes, my only child collapses on stage.

"NO!" The crowd parts for me as I try to rush my way to the stage. "MY BABY! YOU CAN'T TAKE MY BABY FROM ME!"

The last thing I remember is the butt of a Peacekeeper's stun gun connecting with my face and the world around me spinning out of control.

When I came to, I learned that the boy chosen to be her district partner was none other than Thaddeus Smith, the sixteen year old boy that felt the need to bash President Hollis whenever possible, no matter what the consequences. His parents and grandparents had been in the Rebellion and his grandfather was even executed for his role in the uprisings. This only seemed to fuel his need to speak out against the Capitol and I guess this was everyone's way of shutting him up and keeping the Peacekeepers off our backs. At least I knew it wasn't a lunatic that would slaughter my poor angel in her sleep before they even reached the Games.

No one expected anything less to come of me when they found my body hanging from rafters of my modest house. They already knew I was dead inside when I agreed to let them chose my little Sophie. I just hope that my spirit will find a way to be with hers, when I make it to the other side...

I am an arms dealer

Fitting you with weapons in the form of words

And don't really care, which side wins

Long as the room keeps singing

That's just the business I'm in...

A/N: This was a lot harder to write than you would expect it to be and I felt the need to change it up a bit. As a mother, I thought about how I would feel if I had to knowingly let my baby girl go into the games, even if she was slowly suffering here at home. I know for a fact that my life would end the way Chasity's did. Also, I'd like to apologize if this is depressing as all hell, I promise to make District Ten's less dark. Thanks, as always, to my loyal readers and to Richards25 and Nrrrd-Grrrl-Meg for the use of their tributes. Only three Reapings left before we get to the meat and potatoes of the story and I being the selections for Bloodbath victims.