Kimberly was setting out teacups and saucers on a little table. Some of the children who dreamt while she did would meet her and they would have a tea party. She looked forward to the day she had children of her own and could have a real tea party. She listened to the light clink of the teacup as she set it upon the table. Humming to herself, she laid napkins beside the teacups as she waited for the children.

"Hawke."

Kimberly lifted her head and stared into the murky grey of the Fade. She never thought to hear that voice again. She swallowed deeply and turned around to face the voice.

"Anders."

She looked at him. He was still dressed in his black robes, donned with feathers, his blonde hair tied back and a day's stubble upon his chin. He looked exactly like he did the day she plunged a dagger into his back.

"Are you still with that close-minded murdering elf?"

"Fenris is not..." Kimberly instantly jumped to Fenris's defense, but then she realized that he was right about one thing - Fenris had killed, murdered even, people. Bust so had she - so had they all. "Yes, we are still together."

"At least you aren't alone," he replied gently.

Kimberly couldn't think of a response. It was kindest thing Anders had ever said about Fenris. A silence fell between them for several long moments.

"Are you trapped here?" she asked tentatively.

"Yes. I believe the Maker does not approve of mage freedom."

"The Maker does not approve of the mass murder of innocents."

"You've blood on your hands too, Hawke."

Kimberly swallowed. It was true enough, but not the same. Everyone she killed had been guilty. Guilty of crimes that were worth death? Maybe, maybe not. But most of the time she had just been defending herself. Except when she killed Anders. That was truly murder... or was it justice?

"I've your blood on my hands, Anders." She shook her head. "Some days I think it's still there. Killing you will haunt me for the rest of my life."

Anders took a step forward. He reached out to touch her face, but nothing is solid in the Fade. She didn't want him touching her anyway. She looked away. Away from the troubled look in his eyes. Away from the rough blonde ponytail that once taunted her, away from the chocolate brown eyes that once melted her when Fenris had turned cold. There had never been anything physical between Anders and her but their friendship had run deep, tied together and bound in magic. Until he used her to blow up the Chantry, and in her ignorance she had helped him. A tear slipped down her cheek.

"I forgive you."

Kimberly shook her head and backed away from him, bumping into the tiny tea table she had so carefully been setting only moments ago.

"I don't know if I forgive you, Anders."

His face scrunched up as it always did when he was confused, and she took the opportunity to squeeze past him into the open. The children weren't coming tonight. She didn't want them to come tonight anyway. Not when she was in the presence of a murderer.

"For freeing the mages?"

"You didn't free anyone. Mages and templars hunt each other now in the open. We had to sneak away - Fenris, Merril, Varric and me - we ran from our homes, we ran into the woods, and I don't know if we can ever come out."

A scowl crossed Anders's face. "Is that all you can think about Hawke? Your cozy mansion in Hightown? A place for you to lord over all of those less fortunate than you? Templars never raided your home. Templars never stole your children. Templars never taunted and tortured you, threatened you with the Rite of Tranquility. No, Hawke was safe and sound in her ivory tower. Untouchable because Meridith found you useful."

"Ivory tower? Is that what you think of me?"

"You never helped the people of Darktown. I was always there, healing the poor, saving the sick, right there in the filth and the dirt, helping."

"I cleaned up the streets of Lowtown, Hightown and Darktown. You should remember that, you were there too."

"But what did you do with all your money, Hawke? You didn't donate it all to the poor."

"Are you jealous that I had a place to live? That I provided a home to Bohdan and Sandal and Orana?"

"That's three people. What about the rest of them?"

"I helped where I could. Walter and Cricket and the rest. I can't help everyone."

"And now what do you do? Do you still help those in need?"

"Yes, I have two mages..."

"Two? Is that all?"

"Anders, we are on the run. We are scraping by... we took in two mages - two more mouths to feed. I gave money to Bodhan before I left. I did what I could. What more do you want from me?"

"You should be fighting not hiding. Did Meridith finally stop looking the other way?"

Kimberly shook her head. "Meridith is dead too. She was insane, that much was true. It was the idol from the Deep Roads that drove her that way. But you, what's your excuse? You merged with a spirit intentionally. You became an abomination. No matter how you try to cover it up, no matter how you try to avoid it, no matter how you try to explain it away. You were an abomination, Anders. You were the very thing the templars feared. You almost killed an innocent girl in your rage. I barely stopped you. I always had to stop you from going too far. Or was it Justice that I needed to contain? Will you blame him again for your actions?"

"Justice is free of me now. He is in the Fade where he belongs. But I don't regret merging with him. I saved his life - and I was not an abomination!"

"Anders! Listen to yourself! You admit you merged with a spirit. That makes you an abomination by definition!"

"What would you know about it, Hawke? Have you never been tempted by a demon? I wasn't. Justice protected me."

"I have not been tempted! Nothing disgusts me more."

"Oh, so I disgust you? You should have spoken up sooner. I mistook you for a friend."

"Anders!"

Suddenly, Kimberly heard someone calling her name. They were a long way off. Outside the Fade. She turned her head to listen to the voice, but when she turned back, Anders was striding away from her. "Anders! We are not done with this conversation! Anders!"

XXXX

Fenris knew it was dangerous to wake a sleeping mage but he had to do something. Kimberly kept crying out Anders's name. The elf gently spoke to her at first, his voice becoming more insistent each time she cried out. He nudged her, but her head merely shook and she became more agitated. Finally, he shouted, "Kimberly, wake up!"

Slowly, the mage's eyes opened. Fenris was looking down at her, his face full of concern. "Are you all right?" he asked.

Kimberly's eyes were already tearing up. "Oh Fenris!" she cried, and threw her arms around him. As he wrapped his arms around her, he felt her begin to sob. He gently stroked her back trying to soothe her. "Tell me, if you want."

She shook her head at first, crying quietly into his shoulder. When the worst of the heart wrenching tears subsided, she asked him, "Do you really want to know?"

"I assume you dreamt of Anders. You were calling his name."

She nodded. "I met him in the Fade. We argued."

"So he didn't make it to the Maker's side."

"No, he's a wanderer. I think he's OK with that because he believes the Maker doesn't agree with mage freedom." Kimberly pulled back a little from the embrace so that she could look at Fenris. "He still has such bitterness. He's free of Justice now, but you wouldn't know it." She shook her head.

"What did you argue about?"

"Everything. Why I didn't help the people of Darktown more. Why did Meridith protect me all those years. Why don't I do more for the mage cause."

"Did you tell him what happened at the Gallows? And since?"

"Yes, I tried to but I'm not sure he was listening."

"Anders never did listen."

Kimberly dropped out of the embrace and began to worry at her fingernails. After a long pause, she spoke softly. "He forgives me for killing him. Now I just have to forgive myself."

Fenris reached out and stroked her hair. She began to tremble as tears threatened her again. He pulled her close to his chest and held her. "Anders and I had our differences, but I still believe you made the right choice. He was wrong to blow up the Chantry and everyone inside. He deserved to die for that. Forgive yourself, you deserve it."

"Are you so sure I did the right thing? I made him a martyr. Maybe if I had let him live then this mage rebellion would have settled quickly."

"No, there was no going back once the Chantry was destroyed. As he said, he removed the chance at compromise. We are where we are because of him. Don't forgive him so easily."

"Ivory tower," she mumbled through her tears.

Not quite hearing her, Fenris asked, "What?"

"Something Anders said. Oh, it doesn't matter." But it did matter to her. His words had cut her. Had she really done all that much for Kirkwall? Did she even deserve the title of Champion? Did it matter now?

Fenris rubbed her back gently. "Are you sure?"

Kimberly nodded. She leaned into him and he embraced her again. They sat in companionable silence for a long time before she went back to sleep.

XXXX

Henric was awake. Not for the first time, either. He often wasn't asleep even though he pretended he was. Instead, he watched the group through half-slitted eyes. He watched them play cards, he watched them talk, he watched them break into groups. William fawning all over the Dalish elf, Varric humming to himself or telling stories or talking to his crossbow, Hawke and Fenris with their love-hate relationship. It was the latter that intrigued him most. It was growing harder and harder to dislike Hawke. She was kind to him even when he was mean to her. Talia's loss still rubbed him raw and any talk of the templars or the tower put salt into the wound. It wasn't Kimberly's fault but he lashed out at her anyway. When he watched her with Fenris, sometimes he was reminded of Talia. It was painful to see them together. Like tonight when she called out another's name and yet the elf still went to her. Comforted her. He was kind and compassionate, something Henric would never have expected from such a dispassionate warrior. Henric watched as Fenris laid Kimberly back down on her bedroll, fast asleep. He watched him watch over her, his attention split between watching for trouble and watching her for more signs of nightmares. The mage and the mage-hater. It was hard to fathom. Henric closed his eyes and tried to go back to sleep.