Ally's POV
I couldn't believe I had let myself get that vulnerable in front of Austin yesterday. I was pretty embarrassed, to say the least. I was pretty open with my feelings when it came to songwriting or talking to my friends about a couple of my feelings, but nobody had ever seen that side of me, the broken side of a girl who is scarred from her past.
It was no surprise that I had crossed some sort of line for Austin, too. How could I just cry like that? I must have made him so awkward and I'm hating myself for it. I remind myself that he hugged me first, but did he have a choice? He could have just stood there and let me cry, he didn't have to hug me, but he probably felt obligated. It was thoughtless of me to just subject myself like that to someone. Although, Austin hadn't wanted me to leave either and he continued to ask if I was okay, so he had to care about how I felt at least a little bit. If he hadn't, he could've made up an excuse on why I had to leave.
My bedroom door swung open and a very exhausted Trish appeared in the doorway. I looked over, pulling my hands away from the keyboard that I was tinkering with. She didn't say anything, she just gave me a look. I didn't quite catch on as I said, "Yes?"
She rolled her eyes, "Some people aren't nocturnal like you, some people actually want to sleep at night. What do you think you're doing?" she croaked, groggily. I looked back at my piano and realized that I had totally ignored the fact that it was two in the morning and Trish was sleeping.
"Sorry," I winced, grabbing my sheet of music where I had messily scribbled down a couple of melodies. "I just had a song on my mind."
"And I respect that," she said sincerely before her soft eyes darkened, "But not right now, I want to sleep."
"Again, Sorry," I told her. She rolled her eyes, waving a dismissive hand at me and leaving my room. I glanced over at my door again before jotting down a couple lyrics that had crossed my mind. I hummed the melody to myself as I stared at the sheets of paper in my hands, analyzing the song I was writing.
I took a seat on my bedroom floor and leaned my back against my bed. I stared at my wall, lazily writing lyrics onto the paper I had sat down next to me while I hummed the melody to my song. Generally, I was focused and very lost in my songwriting, but not tonight. I couldn't get over what I had done to Austin. I couldn't decide whether I was embarrassed for showing my inner demons to him or the fact that I was nervous about what he thought now; Was he going to run away from me now? To cry in front of someone is to trust them, to trust them is to get close to them, Austin did not like getting close to anybody. I might've wrecked something.
I recalled texting him today considering that we've finally swapped numbers. He had answered every single text and he seemed fine. Not annoyed, or nervous, maybe a little bit cheery that I had texted him. Maybe I hadn't wrecked anything at all and I'm worried about nothing! Or I'm worried about the right thing's and I totally destroyed every little bondage I had made with him over the last couple of weeks.
I sighed and dropped my pen. I rested my head back against my bed, ignoring the throbbing in my tailbone from sitting in an awkward position. Austin was really the only friend I had that actually listened to my opinions (more people probably should because I have the best opinions) , he was the only friend I've ever had that has the same understanding for music as I do. I couldn't lose that. My heart pounded behind my breast bone. I better not have wrecked what we had because I had let myself get vulnerable. It's my fault really; I didn't have to bring him to the cemetery. I could have explained to him that my parents weren't around and nothing dramatic and deep would have happened.
I started to tell myself to focus on the fact that he hadn't started ignoring me, so that was always a good thing. He did also want to hang out again and he promised that he doesn't pity me even though I had caught the pitying look in his eyes.
I collected the sheets of paper that had lyrics messily scrawled all over it and set it on my bed as I stood up. I felt the need to get some fresh air, despite the fact that it was practically the middle of the night. I slipped into some leggings and pulled a sweatshirt over my head. My feet sat snuggly into some flats and I quietly exited mine and Trish's apartment.
Lyrics were still buzzing around in my mind, obviously not wanting me to take the break from the song. I pulled out my phone and recorded the lyrics into my notes before shoving my phone into the pocket of my sweatshirt. The wind was brushing against my cheeks in a nurturing way and I filled my lungs with the wanted air.
Walking alone in the dark was probably the best dumbest idea I've ever had, but I didn't let any insecure feelings of what belonged in the night bother me. Instead, I enjoyed the view of the moon that acted as a spotlight on the city of Miami and recalled the evening walks I used to have with my mother back when I was a little girl. Instead of letting the memory come running down my cheeks in the form of salty tears, I smiled. I watched my feet as they stepped along the hard pavement. I find myself at the dock.
I sit down at the edge staring at the rippling water that was calm at the moment. It sparkled beneath the moon's reflection. It was a lonely night, but somehow this loneliness comforted me. It was quiet, the kind that was often needed by such an introvert as I.
I slipped inside my thoughts and fell so deeply into them that I almost didn't catch the sound of shuffling feet. Pulling myself into reality, my stomach bubbled with anxiety. My heart picked up and my throat got tight making it nearly impossible for me to gulp down the lump that had made its home there. I wasn't stupid, so I didn't call out 'Hello?' or 'Who's there?' like those girls in the horror movies. Speaking of which, that's the stupidest thing you could ever do. Let alone, why would you greet an intruder or a killer? The fact is beyond me! But I might be pretty stupid, too, because I don't reach for my phone or try to shuffle to the side and hope that whoever was walking towards me didn't see me, I just sat there motionlessly. I didn't turn my head to sneak a glance at the stranger, I stared out at the water.
When the strangers starts talking to me, I know that there's no hiding now. "So, I'm not the only one who comes out here at night?" he asked, not taking a seat, just standing next to me.
I don't feel as threatened when I catch the sound of the stranger's voice. It's familiar, but I don't recognize it just yet. "Yeah," I manage to get the word passed my lips that I have just noticed have gone dry. I'm too scared to look at who is beside me.
From my peripheral vision, I do catch the actions of the stranger's muscles stiffening. He doesn't explain why he's gotten tense when he says, "It's always a lot cooler at night and nobody's really around. It's quite relaxing. A good place to think over things." That voice. It's too familiar...
"Agreed," I blurted. I somehow couldn't force more than one word out from my throat. I knew my voice would shake if I did. Then the stranger pulls his hands away from his and leans forward to take a look at my face. It would be obvious that I was trying to avoid his gaze if I just stared forward so I hold my breath and look at him. The breath leaves my lungs and the anxiety deflates. I know those brown eyes.
"Ally?" His eyes are wide.
"Austin, hey," I said, running a hand through my chestnut hair. "I didn't know that was you." I admit, honestly, but I leave the bit out where I thought he might have been a killer.
"What are you doing out here?" he questioned me, still seeming slightly thrown off that the person he had been talking to was me. I shrugged my shoulders and looked out at the water.
Thinking about you. "Wanted some fresh air."
He slumps down beside me, his arm brushing against mine. I ignore that I shivered and dismiss it for the cold air. "It's quarter after two in the morning. You should be in bed."
"I could say the same for you," I sent him a sideways glance. He smiles slightly and shakes his head.
"That's different. I always come out here. Besides, I'm a guy. You're a girl." he said.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I frowned.
"Well..." he drawls, "If a stranger would have come up to you just now, he could hurt you. I'm a guy, nobody's going to bother me." He tosses out a rock into the water. He somehow always has a collection of rocks to toss into the water and it always makes me curious as to why he carries rocks around. He must be obsessed with skipping stones or something.
"Well, nothing happened so it's fine," I grinned at him. He shook his head. "What are you doing out here?"
"Like I said, I always come here. When I'm not sleeping anyways." Austin replied. He ran a hand through his blonde hair that was in a tousled mess. "It relaxes me out here and then I can go back and sleep. Is there a reason you're avoiding me?" he asked, staring out at the rippling water.
"What?" I blurted, looking at him, my eyes slightly wide.
"Well...You've texted me, but you haven't exactly come around like you normally do." Austin said. "I was just wondering why."
"No reason," I quickly said. He didn't seem to notice how quickly I had answered. "Did you miss me?" I winked, nudging him with my elbow. Austin laughed slightly. I caught something in his gaze before it flickered away.
"Not really," he replied. I laughed, too.
It fell slightly quiet and I decided to question him about my insecurities. "Austin...I didn't...I didn't happen to...um...I didn't happen to make you uncomfortable...did I?" I sputtered out. He looked at me alarmed before his eye brows furrowed and he slowly shook his head.
"No," he responded, "Why?"
"Just checking," I said, focusing on my legs that I was swinging above the water.
He hesitated before asking, "You were avoiding me."
"What? No," I denied, but I was. I nearly laughed at myself. This entire time I was worried about Austin avoiding me, when I was the one performing all the avoidance.
Austin didn't stop, "You were avoiding me because you thought I got uncomfortable with...what happened." he said. I didn't reply this time because I felt there was no point in denying the truth. Besides, he wouldn't stop until I admitted to it. "Ally," he shook his head and managed to let out a chuckle, "I didn't get uncomfortable. I'm actually glad that you trust me like that." His voice faltered slightly. I had a feeling he had some sort of trust issues and I was sure there was something on his mind.
"Okay," I said, my voice soft. "What about you?" I forced myself to ask, "Do you trust me like that?"
"Well, I-"
"-It's okay," I interrupted, "I understand."
He stared at me for a moment before he said, "Yes, Ally. I do trust you like that."
I turned my head and looked at him, our eyes holding each other for a moment. His eyes sparkled with something I couldn't quite read. His face had gotten a little paler and I wondered if he was about to faint. He looked nervous or...scared, maybe? I wished he knew that he didn't have to be afraid, especially of me.
He laughed, "I'm not afraid of you, Ally."
Apparently, I had said that out loud.
"It's just weird, you know?" he said, "I've never exactly...trusted anyone. Dez is probably the only person I've ever trusted and I only trust him because we've been friends for years. I've never trusted anyone as fast as I've trusted you."
I felt honored. "Really?" I said, my eyes twinkled with awe. He chuckled and looked away from me for some reason. He nodded. "You kind of have a funny way of showing it, to be honest." I mentioned to him after a moment.
He laughed slightly, "Do I?"
"Yes, you do." I replied. "But that's okay. Why do you trust me so much?" Because, really, I wouldn't trust me. I can hardly keep my own secrets, let alone somebody else's.
"Because you're you," he said. I wished I understood what that meant.
"Oh." Was all I could think to say at the moment.
"You don't...You don't judge people and you accept things for the way they are and not for how you wish they were. You're good at listening, too. You don't take something from someone and then go share it with the rest of the world. I mean, at least I hope you don't." he said.
"I don't." I confirmed.
"Good." he replied. I nodded, smiling slightly. I felt a wholeness inside of my heart. Something I had been lacking for a long time. I wondered why I felt it, but I didn't get into it. I tried not to yawn, but I was really tired. Austin glanced over at me and noticed. He smiled slightly. "You should probably go home now."
"I probably should," I agreed. I stood up, dusting myself off. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow, Austin."
"Well, don't say goodnight just yet," he said, "I'm still walking you home."
"Oh, well, you don't have to do that." I told him.
"I know." he said. "But I should because it's super dark and I kind of don't want you to die."
"That's a good reason," I said. He laughed and nodded. We walked together, discussing random things like we normally did. We made it to my apartment sooner or later. I fumbled for my keys inside my sweatshirt's pocket until I found them. "Goodnight, Austin," I smiled at him.
His eyes widened for a moment before they softened and he nodded. I wondered what had come to his mind that made him look so...traumatized? I decided I wasn't going to question it and I waved goodbye as I stepped through the door and made my way down the hall. As I was walking, I stopped in my steps. I realized that Austin hadn't smirked at me at all. He had smiled, and very genuinely, too. I slowly looked over my shoulder to stare at the front entrance where Austin had been but he was now gone. I turned back around and stared ahead of me as I pondered my thoughts before I forced myself to walk again.
Austin's POV
I didn't sleep when I got home. You'd think that after all that heart pounding, breathing taking, and shaky fingers would cause some exhaustion. It never did. In fact, all of that seemed to keep me more awake. Now I was paying for it with a nauseas feeling tickling my stomach and a migraine pressing against my forehead from lack of sleep. I should have stayed home and not have walked to that dock. But then again, Had I not gone to the dock, I wouldn't have found Ally and if I hadn't of found Ally, she could have walked home alone and she could've gotten hurt, some weird guy could have stalked her and found out where she lived and then he would've broken into her apartment-
"Austin!"
My gaze found the person who had called my name. "What do you need Dez?" I asked him.
"Nothing. You were in deep thought and I thought it would be proper to interrupt you." Dez gave me a wide grin, putting his hands onto his hips. I shook my head and focused on my guitar which I was tuning. I realized that I hadn't been paying attention the entire time, obviously, and my guitar was way off key.
"Well, thanks for that, Dez," I told him and he gave me a thumbs up. His toast popped and stuffed it into his mouth. I grimaced. Toast without butter, jam, nutella, or peanut butter disgusted me. Dez ate everything plain. Burgers, fries, pancakes(!), mashed potatoes, etc.
"You must've been thinking about something very important to make your guitar sound like that," he said, casting me a glance.
I looked at him. I couldn't let him know that my deep thinking was because of Ally. Besides, he still thinks I like her and I've very clearly mentioned to him that I don't but he hasn't believed me yet. I laughed nervously, "Yup."
"I hope it wasn't about that girl who was here a couple of days ago," he said, hitting the nail on the head without even realizing it.
I shook my head frantically, "Oh, no, no, no, no, God, no!"
"Oh, okay." he said.
"...Is there anything wrong with it if I was?" I questioned, "Hypothetically speaking, of course." I quickly added.
Dez shook his head, "Nothing. It would just mean that it goes against everything you've ever believed." Slowly, my eyes looked at him. "I know you have a crush on this girl, but if you don't stop thinking about her, it might become something more than a crush and then you'll really-"
"I don't like Ally," I said quickly.
"You're defensive." he stated, giving me a look.
"I apologize for not wanting my best friend to digest wrong information," I told him, setting my guitar down.
"Oh, Austin, don't apologize for liking a girl-"
"-I don't like Ally!"
There was a knock on the door. Dez pranced over to the door and opened it wide. My frown fell from my face as I sat up straighter when I saw the familiar brunette standing there. Her laid back posture tenses slightly and she holds her hands shyly as she peers up at Dez from beneath her full lashes. She had obviously forgotten that he lived here with me.
"Hi," she said, quietly but the politeness in her voice didn't go unnoticed.
"Ally," Dez sang, his voice raising in pitch as he glanced over at me and I saw a smirk curl onto his lips. I rolled my eyes and stood up. Ally's shy posture relaxed and she grinned at the sight of me. I smiled slightly.
"Oh, hey, Austin," she said, "I figured you might want a song for tomorrow."
"Oh, Yeah, Yeah, sure," I said, stumbling on each word as if they were too thick to get past my lips. Why was this happening all of a sudden?
At some point, Dez had moved aside and he was watching at Ally and I with observant blue eyes. Ally's smile widened slightly, "Great! I also wrote a song and wanted to have an opinion on it." Ally said. I nodded, a smile had tugged onto my lips.
"So, Ally," Dez suddenly stepped in, a fat grin on his face. Ally focused on him, her lips twisting into an 'O' shape as if she'd just remembered that he was still here. "Do you have a crush on this Austin Monica Moon boy?"
My eyes widened as I looked at him and hissed, "Dez!"
When I snuck a glance at Ally, her eyes were big and round. She points at herself, lips opening and closing as if she had trouble getting over what Dez had just said. Finally, she spats out the word, "Me?"
"Yes, you." Dez nods, shoving me away when I stepped forward about to save her from Dez's ridiculousness.
Ally's perfectly trimmed eye brows knit together, now furrowed. "Well, no," she said, "He's my friend."
Why did that make my heart sink? "Thanks for that, Dez," I said, "She's probably never gonna come back here now."
"It was just a simple question," he shrugged, "But I got the answer and I'm done: Are you?" he asked, his lips curling upwards. I was going to slug him in the nose when I was finished hanging out with Ally. Actually, I think I'll connect my fist to his lips to prevent him from smiling at me ever again.
"Dez," I gave him a look, unable to know how to respond to his question in front of Ally. I glanced over at her and saw the confusion on her face. I shook my head, "Ally and I are gonna go." I told him. I walked over to the couch I had been sitting on earlier and grabbed my guitar.
"Alright, I won't keep you any longer," he said, his lips still in a wide smirk.
"Great, thanks," I replied, sarcastically. I focused on the girl who had recently become very good at making my heart pound and motioned with a nod for her to step out of the apartment. She stiffly waves bye to Dez and takes a step back. I follow her and give Dez one last look before shutting the door.
"Your roommate is...odd." she said, holding her left arm against her side.
"You don't have to tell me, I already know," I said, and only when I spoke did I realize that my teeth were gritted. I force a smile down at Ally and just the sight of how brown her eyes were made my jaw unclench.
"What was that about anyways?" she questioned, "Does he still think that we're together?"
Realizing Ally would be easy to fool, I said, "Yeah...Yeah, he thinks that we're together and trying to hide it or something." I laughed.
She laughed and it sounded so much like a melody, I almost asked to record it so I could listen to it on a loop. I held my breath because now I was getting ridiculous and starting to wonder if Dez was right: Did I have a crush on Ally? I sure hope I didn't.
Ally had led me into her apartment. Miami was having a massive heat wave and we decided it was best to stay inside where we wouldn't sweat like pigs. I grimaced at Ally's cat. What was his name again? Grant? Grady? Gary?
"Griffin!"
Close enough.
Ally collected her kitten into her arms and holding him closely. Her eyes sparkled with a joy that I hadn't seen before. She stroked his face gently and the little nuisance started purring. I almost scoffed at the undeserved attention he was getting. A warm sensation bubbled inside my chest. Oh, For the love, Was I jealous of a stupid cat? Unbelievable, Un-freaking-believable! Wait, jealous? The only way I could be jealous was if I felt something towards Ally, which I didn't. This warm feeling must be heart burn from not having anything to eat yet.
I realized Ally was frowning at me. "What?" I said, wondering if she mistook my trance for ignoring her. After all, last night I had discovered that she was afraid that I was afraid of becoming close to her. I couldn't believe she caught onto something like that. I lied and told her that she didn't scare me, but if I were to be honest with her, I would have told her that she terrified me.
"I can see the way you're staring at him and I don't like it," Ally glared at me. I rolled my eyes before I yelped, grabbing my shin that was now growing a bruise because Ally had kicked me. "No one's mean to Griffin," she said in a baby-voice as she stared at her cat and stroked his face again.
"You're ridiculous. I thought we came here to write a song, not worship a cat." I blurted, hoping that my tone wasn't too sharp despite that weird feeling in my chest. Stupid heart burn.
Ally gave me one last angered glare before smiling at her cat and setting him on the floor. The little whore rubbed his side against her leg, continuing to purr. Ally looked impossibly beautiful staring at the small animal at her feet. The damn thing has got her wrapped right around it's finger! ...Or...paw?
"Do you want to show me your song first?" I questioned her, hoping to get her attention off of that cat. Ally looked at me and her eyes got slightly bigger as if she had just reminded herself that she'd asked me to hear it. She bit down on her bottom lip nervously before nodding hesitantly.
"Right," she said. She waved at me to follow her and I did. I figured it was her room. I glanced around. It was neat and tidy (Not surprising.) Her bed was neatly made with fluffy pillows and a sweater thrown on the bed. She had pictures frames along the walls of herself, that stupid cat, a girl I recognized as her friend Trish, and a couple I'd never seen before. I stepped towards it and analyzed their faces. My heart pinched slightly when I realized they were her parents. She looked like a combination of the two of them. I took my gaze away from the frames while Ally shuffled with a couple papers. She had multiple photographs taped along her wall, making the room look very crafty. She had an acoustic guitar sitting in its stand next to her bed and her piano was leaned against the wall. She had a music stand shoved in the corner of the room, a scarf draped over it. A string of white decorative lights ran around the perimeter of the ceiling. A very small desk was pushed against the other wall, papers scattered all over it in a messy way (that surprised me) and next to it was a book that I recognized to be her songbook. Her room looked small from being so crowded, but I don't think she minded.
"Okay," she said, bringing my attention back to her. She was sitting down at the piano. She fixed two papers so she could read the music notes and lyrics, obviously not having the song memorized yet. I saw the title of the song written in capital letters: 'Iridescent'.
"Okay," I echoed, grinning at her. She glanced over at me and I saw a smile tug on the corners of her lips but before I could see the beauty of it, she had focused on the piano keys, getting her fingers in place.
"Don't make fun of it, okay?" she told me.
"I promise," I assured her, though I didn't know why she would say such a thing because her songwriting was perfect, in my opinion. She took a deep breath before she let her fingers play with the right keys. She grunted when she made a simple mistake and then started over. I loved that she made the mistake, because she did it so perfectly. Everything she did was just perfect. I felt a quirk of happiness in my gut, grateful that I met her. I swallowed a lump in my throat. Dez was right. I did like Ally and I could feel myself falling faster and faster. The worst part was that Ally wasn't holding out her arms to catch me. I was going to fall hard against the pavement, I was going to be bruised and totally broken. The even worst part: I didn't seem to mind.
I stopped my worrying and squirming thoughts when Ally started to sing. It was different than what she normally wrote.
When you were standing in the wake of devastation
When you were waiting on the edge of the unknown
And with the cataclysm raining down
Insides crying, "Save me now!"
You were there, impossibly alone
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation?
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go. Let it go
And in a burst of light that blinded every angel
As if the sky had blown the heavens into stars
You felt the gravity of tempered grace
Falling into empty space
No one there to catch you in their arms
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation?
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go. Let it go
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation?
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go. Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Do you feel cold and lost in desperation?
You build up hope, but failure's all you've known
Remember all the sadness and frustration
And let it go. Let it go
She stopped playing. I had taken a seat on her bed at some point while she was playing. I was leaned forward, listening intensely. My hands had found their way to my mouth while I had been listening to her play such a flawless song. She slowly looked over at me, nervously. "Wow," I whispered as I pulled my hand away from my mouth. I cleared my throat, sitting up straighter. "That was awesome, Als." Als? Well, don't make her hate you!
The right corner of Ally's lips quirked upwards, "Thank you," she said, a blush swirling onto her cheeks. I smiled slightly.
"You are the best songwriter I will ever know," I told her.
"No," she shook her head, "That's a lie. My stuff is...it's not like the others. It's not good."
I think she said that to humor me but when I waited for her to burst into laughter, I realized she was serious. "Do you really think that your stuff isn't good?" I asked her. She didn't reply. "That's stupid." Was all I could muster up.
She opened her mouth to say something but she closed it, silencing her own words before they slipped out which was probably a smart decision because I would've slapped her mind with a long speech about how great she is.
Just kidding; I don't care if she's silent, I'm going to lecture her about her writing anyways. "Ally, you have an amazing gift. Nobody writes like you do. You're incredible and I'm not just saying that because I'm your friend." The word 'friend' nearly died on my lips, "You're very talented. You write, sing, play the piano and guitar. It's insane. You write words like I've never even thought of putting together. If you weren't any good, I wouldn't waste my time telling you this or having you write songs for me to play at the Diner."
She smiled. "Thank you, Austin."
"That was an incredible song, Ally. How'd you think of it?" I questioned, lost in the how's of the way she writes.
Ally stared at me for a long moment before stating, "A friend inspired me."
I wondered who the friend was. That burning feeling was in my chest again but I shoved it away. "What a good friend," I said. She laughed slightly, nodding.
"He really is," she smiled softly at me. So, the friend is a guy. That's cool, that's cool...
"So...So tell me about this friend," I suddenly said. She frowned at me confusedly and slowly nodded. "Do I know him?"
"Yeah, you're closest to him actually." she said.
It's Dez. Oh my god, it's Dez. "Really?" I said through a tight smile. Her smile tugged up a little more and she nodded. "How long have you known him?"
"A few weeks." she told me.
Just kidding, it's not Dez. Who is this guy? Who do I know? It can't be Gavin. Or Elliott. Maybe Jace. "What's his name?" I questioned her.
"I'm not telling you his name," she refused.
"Why not?" I growled.
She looked at me, slightly alarmed. "Because that's too much information."
"Why?" I questioned, a low noise bubbling up from the back of my throat. I don't know what has gotten into me, I just know that I didn't like this guy and I was determined to find out who he was so I could tell him to back off.
"Because my songwriting is personal and the people I write about are a part of my personal life. End of discussion." she said, looking back to her parents and clearing them from her piano. I felt a muscle in my jaw jump in irritation but I didn't push the conversation further.
"Okay," I said, despite how much I wanted to tear her room apart until I figured out who this guy was. For God's sake, When did I become so possessive?
"Do you want to write your song now?" she questioned. My gaze got stuck in hers and I felt the muscles in my jaw relax. I nodded.
"That'd be cool," I said. She grinned and nodded.
"I already wrote a few lyrics that jumped in my head. I was thinking about putting them to a melody - but if they don't fit the melody, we could change them." she said. I nodded and grabbed my guitar, settling it onto my lap. Ally searched her room before letting out a small 'There it is!' and walking towards me.
Ally's presence next to me made my fingers tingle. I tried to get rid of the sensation by plucking strings on my guitar and then I heard a catchy melody instantly. "Oh, I like this." I muttered. When I looked up, I saw Ally watching me with a smile on her face. "What?" I asked, my blood temperature rising and I swear to God, I'll commit suicide if my cheeks are red.
"Nothing," she chirped, shaking her head and looking at her paper but the smile didn't go away. I stared at her for a moment, observing her features. Her eye lashes were long and slightly curled, they framed her brown eyes perfectly. She had golden eye shadow brushed along her eye lids, the perfect shade to match her milky skin. Her lips were painted over in nice shade of red, bringing out the fullness in her lips. I couldn't look away from her lips. I wanted to feel them - No, I don't. No, I don't. I do not. I do not want to feel Ally's lips on mine. Not at all. That was just me being polite. Yeah, polite. That's it.
Ally let me play around with notes and chords on the guitar before she snapped her fingers, capturing my attention. "There it is," she said, "That's perfect. That's the tune."
"This?" I questioned, playing it again. She nodded frantically.
"Yes, it fits the words perfectly," she told me. I nodded. She shuffled closer to me and my heart stopped beating. My lungs held tightly onto my breath as I looked at her, her side nearly touching mine and I liked having her so close despite the fact I felt like she was suffocating me. "So, I wrote - Austin, are you okay? You're really pale."
Her eyes were worried as I looked at her and I did not know how to talk right now. It dawned on me fully: I had a crush on Ally. She waited for me to respond but I never got around to it. I tried to swallow the lump in my throat but it wouldn't budge. I smiled at her, trying to prove that I was fine but the worry was in her eyes.
"Do you need something to drink?" she questioned, "Maybe you're sick from last night." She had scurried off to her kitchen, shuffling around in her fridge. I could breathe when she left, but now I felt like she had taken all the heat in the room with her.
"Ally, I'm fine," I croaked out. What happened to my voice? I glared over at the cat that was sitting in the corner of the room just watching me. I hope the little rat didn't have some sort of psychological powers and was cursing me with these feelings for Ally because I just wanted them to stop.
"It's okay, this water is fresh!" she said, rushing towards me and handing me the glass of water. The warmth of the room returned. I gave her a grateful smile and took the glass. I gulped the water, wondering if it would get rid of the tightness of my throat. "Austin, you look tired."
"Oh, it's nothing," I told her, pleased when I found my voice again.
"Did you sleep at all last night?" she questioned me.
"Ally, I'm fine," I assured her.
She frowned at me. "Why didn't you sleep?"
"I did," I lied.
"You're lying." she said, "The corner of your mouth always twitches when you lie."
I touched my lips before I smirked at her, "Noticed that, did you?"
"It's hard to miss."
"Right," I replied. I swallowed hard, "So, you were saying about the song-"
"Austin, maybe you should go home and sleep," she said, "I'll finish the song now that we've got the melody. I'll just need you to show me how to play." An image of me teaching Ally the chords came to my mind. I thought of her holding the guitar and my arms wrapped around her, holding her hands in place. I quickly gulped the rest of my water.
"No, I want to help." I said.
She was unsure as she said, "Okay."
I started playing the chords again, because I knew that the melody would cease all the tension and awkwardness I had been feeling. Luckily, it did just that. I felt like I could breathe and I knew the color was back in my face because she relaxed and wasn't staring at me so much anymore.
I tried to keep playing because it was the only thing that would keep me sane. She pulled out the sheet again, "So far I've written," she paused, "I've written...Austin, so far I've written..." she was stumbling on her words but I kept playing, "Austin, stop that!" she smacked my arm causing me to mess up on the chords and it released an awful noise. I smiled at her nervously. "Okay, so I've written this: I'll give you one more time / we'll give you one more fight / Said one more line / will I know you."
When she just stared at me questioningly, I realized I had been staring at her and she was just waiting for my response. "Oh," I quickly let out and smiled, "I love it."
She sighed, "Is it that bad?"
"No, no, no, it's good!" I told her, hoping to convince her because I wasn't lying, it really was good, I was just having trouble speaking because she was getting distracting. I quickly peaked over at the sheet and then sang it while playing the chords to it. It fit perfectly. I grinned at her and I guess my grin gave her confirmation that I liked it because she smiled and started scribbling down more words.
"It doesn't belong in the beginning though," she told me, "I need something else." she said, tapping her pencil on her chin. I smiled slightly. Sometimes Ally had this adorableness to her and it was so adorable, I couldn't describe it to anybody.
I forced myself to look away and I stared playing when I felt words tumble into my mind. Nothing like that has ever happened before. I don't know what I was thinking when I started to sing out loud: "She had a face straight outta magazine / God only knows but you'll never leave her / Her balaclava is starting to chafe / and when she gets his gun, he's begging "Babe, stay, stay, stay, stay, stay."
Ally stared at me with a wide eyed expression. My ego immediately crumpled. "Sorry, I was just trying...trying to...I don't know. Sorry." I babbled.
"No, no!" Ally shrieked, suddenly her lips curling upwards into a smile, "That was great, Austin! It's perfect actually! It fit what I wrote and it fits the melody. That was excellent." she said, scribbling it down onto the paper. I smiled slightly.
"Really?" I asked, feeling proud.
"Yes!" she grinned as she continued to scribble down the lyrics. I watched her tap her fingers, mimicking the melody by drumming her fingers against the paper. She scribbled more things down, asking me to play it and when it sounded good, she kept it, and when it sounded odd, she scratched it out. Her writing skills were amazing. I was speechless.
I also fell for her a little bit more.