Scully felt warm and safe in Mulder's arms as he held her in the bed they shared for many years. His hand was productively curled around her baby bump. It had been a long time since he had held her like this, spooned right behind her. When they had separated, she had missed that familiar warmth and intimacy they once shared for so many years in this house. Her smart house might have had all the latest fancy technology, but it never felt like a home. If someone had told her a year ago she'd be living with Mulder again and expecting another child, she would have laughed them out the door.
But here she was and she wouldn't trade any of it for the world. She only regretted fleeing when things got difficult, when Mulder became depressed and allowed it to consume him. In the past year, she realized how much that had changed. How much he had changed. His patience was unremarkable and he always put her needs first. Though he was always passionate about their recent cases, he was more reserved and cautious, yet still that brilliant and handsome man she met 25 years ago.
Scully had changed also. She had allowed her guard to drop around him and allowed him to see the most vulnerable sides of her. Going to his room in the middle of the night on that doppelganger case was what landed them in the present situation she thought with a smile. Admitting fault for their separation and William was also difficult. She still felt like she had failed William. Was he okay? Was her unborn baby different? What if she couldn't protect her? Part of her felt like she didn't deserve this little miracle that was growing inside of her.
"Scully?" Came Mulder's groggy voice.
"Hmm?"
"What's wrong? I can feel you thinking." She sighed.
"I'm worried," she admitted. She knew he wouldn't be satisfied with an 'I'm fine' and communication is what made relationships work, so she was determined to make things right.
"Hmm. Talk to me, Dana," he urged.
Scully moved to face him and she placed her hand over his. "What if something goes wrong...with the baby? I already love her so much, but I'm afraid I might lose her too. We're in our fifties and the odds are against us."
Mulder looked at her with genuine concern. His eyes were full of love. "Oh, I see. Well, we've survived worse odds, Scully. And we've had stranger things happen, so parenting in our fifties would be a walk in the park." He moved to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. "And you won't lose another child. I promise. We won't lose her," he said as he stroked the small bump with his thumb. "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere," he assured. "Not this time."
Scully managed a small smile as she fought back the tears. "And William-he can't be out there all alone. I know he knows that I love him, but I want him to know he has a home."
Mulder thought back to the night at the motel where William said everything was all his fault and that he would have been better off dead. It was like a knife in his heart. Whether the depression was hereditary or as a result of everything he had been through, he wasn't sure.
"I'm so sorry, Mulder. I'm so sorry I left when you needed me. I failed you and I failed William," she began to sob. Her words brought him back to their recent conversation in the church.
Mulder pulled her closer to his chest and moved to wipe away the single tear that made its way down her cheek. She recalled her mother's last words and wished she was here.
"You have to stop blaming yourself for everything, Scully. Those things are in the past. You did what you needed to in order to protect him. You gave him a happy childhood. A life on the run wouldn't have been any life for a child and he knows that too."
"I got to hold him, Mulder. Oh God, he is so much like you."
"He is pretty amazing, huh?" Mulder kissed the top of her head as he hugged her trembling body against him. He was glad Scully finally got a moment with him. She deserved that much.
Scully smiled and cried into his chest until she fell asleep.