I woke up at 10, not heading to school though, because tonight the boys were leaving, and despite my sadness, this was going to be the best day ever for them, and for my sake. I wore a blue and white stripped shirt, tan skinny jeans and white sneakers. I practically ran to Niall's room, knocking before bursting through the door. He was still in bed, buried under a mountain of blankets and pillows. I slid under the covers and ran my hand over his back, making him stir. He groaned and buried his head under his pillow.
"Come on out, cutie," I cooed, running my fingers through his hair.
"Mmm, noooooo," he moaned.
"I'll make you breakfast," I bargained.
"You don't cook."
I groaned, "alright, if that's how you wanna play it."
I got out of bed and ripped the covers off him, his body curling into a ball. He cursed me under his breath and hugged a pillow for warmth. I jumped back on the bed, giggling in Niall's face. I began pushing his body teasingly.
"Knock it off," he groaned.
I giggled again and kept pushing him.
He chuckled darkly, "all righ', that's it.."
He lifted his head from his pillow and pushed me on my back, jumping on me. I groaned playfully.
"Ugh, jeeze thanks, fatty," I smirked.
He feigned hurt, but grinned, "you've got your wish, I'm up."
"Come on, get dressed."
"Wait," he leaned down to my lips, "give me a good-morning kiss."
"Mmm, brush your teeth first," I smiled.
He scoffed but smiled. He went to the bathroom to freshen up while I waited. He came back and bee-lined to me, putting his hands on either side of me on the bed. He smiled, showing me his full mouth of teeth.
"All cleeeean," he sang.
I giggled and puckered my lips teasingly, to which Niall happily connected to. It was calm and sweet and all the same, bittersweet. I was determined not to think about X-Factor, because I knew I'd cry.
"Do you wanna meet the boys for lunch?" He asked, breaking the kiss.
I smiled and nodded ,"yeah, let's do it."
Niall phoned Liam and told him that we'd meet them at the pub. I zoned out, thinking about them leaving tonight. I'd be gone in a little more than a month, back to Canada, once I graduate, and now I'd have to spend these next weeks alone, here, at school. I thought of Zayn and Louis, those crazy boys that I adore like brothers, and I'd miss their insanity and jokes. Liam, that sweet boy, I love him to pieces, he's there when I need someone to talk to, and I'd literally do anything for him, especially now, with Amanda gone. And Harry.. beautiful Harry. I'd miss him the most, besides Niall. In the time I've known him, we've gone through quite a lot, but I know that we're better at being friends. It makes more sense this way, I guess. I'd treated him horribly, so I'm hoping he'll let me apologize today at lunch.
And Niall, the most wonderful, beautiful boy I've ever met. So caring and sweet, and I'd do anything for him, to make him happy and see him smile. It's hard to imagine him not being here. He'd become a part of me, somehow getting under my skin and staying there. I get butterflies when I hear his voice, and nearly collapse with happiness whenever I see him smile. He just makes me weak, in the greatest way possible. Sometimes I just catch myself admiring him, and feeling so overwhelmed with luck that I've gotten to be with him.
"Are you okay?" He laughed, waving a hand in my face. I blinked and looked up at him, an amused look on his face.
"Yeah, just thinking."
His smile faltered, "about?"
"School. The boys. You."
I didn't even need to go into further explanation of my thoughts, because he knew what I meant.
"Come on," he reached for my hand, to which I happily gave him, and we headed out to the restaurant. The boys were already there by the time we got there, and had ordered potato skins for starters. Niall and I sat down on the barstools, rounded by the guys. Liam was next to me, then it went Harry, Louis, Zayn and then Niall. We made absent-minded chatter, no one daring to say anything about the audition, until Louis spoke up.
"When we leaving tonight, gents?" he asked casually. The boys all shot him a death glare.
"What?" He asked, confused.
"Come on, Louis," Niall said.
"It's okay, Niall."
"No, it isn't," he replied dryly.
I looked down at the table, biting my lip as to keep my emotions inside. I felt warmth against my hand, and saw that Liam had taken it, holding it tight. I looked up at him and smiled shortly, and he returned it.
"We just ordered burgers and chips for everyone," Zayn piped up. I giggled at his interference. You gotta hand it to him, he's trying. I looked to Harry, who just twirled his straw around his cup.
"Table 26! Burgers and chips!"
"That's us!" Louis yelled.
"Let's go get it," Liam jeered, letting go of my hand.
He, Louis, Zayn and Niall all stood up. Niall kissed my cheek sweetly before smiling and walking off to help the boys. Harry just kept playing around with his straw.
"I'm sorry," I practically whispered. His eyes locked mine. I felt my whole body become overwhelmed with heat.
"Can we talk, outside?" He asked. I looked to the boys and then back to him, I nodded.
We both stood from the table and I followed him outside, giving Niall a side smile as he watched us walk out. I stood against the wall as Harry looked out across the street.
"I don't wanna go," he said finally.
"Excuse me?"
He turned and faced me, "X-Factor. I don't know if I want to go."
"You have to, it's your dream," I countered.
"Yeah. I want to go, but at the same time, I don't. I don't want to leave.. my Friends, my Family. You."
I looked away from his eyes, Goosebumps rising on my skin.
"I'll be fine," I joked.
"You'll be alone."
"Lonely, but not alone. We'll text, Harry. All the time," I half-smiled.
He took a few steps forward, "you know about Liam and Amanda?"
"Yeah, he told me."
"It sucks," he breathed, "to not have someone to share all of this with. To have someone special be there for you, cheering you on. To love you."
I had a sneaking suspicion that we weren't talking about Liam anymore.
"He's got you guys."
"It's not the same."
"He's got me," I replied, "you all do."
"No, Niall does," he countered hoarsely.
"You all do, I'm here for all of you," I told him, reaching for his hand.
"But Niall has you.."
"Harry," I whispered, rubbing his arm soothingly, "it doesn't matter, I'm going to be here for you."
His eyes became misty with water, and I swear my heart is breaking into a million pieces. He reached for my waist, pulling me close, and burying his head into my neck. I reached around his neck and held him close, and I could feel his tears on my bare skin, making me weak with emotion. I rubbed the back of his neck to try and calm him, but I think if anything, I was only making him feel worse.
"I'm going to miss you so much," he whispered, voice hoarse, against my neck.
"I know, I'll miss you too," I replied, keeping my own tears in. I didn't think that seeing Harry cry would affect me so much.
He lifted his head only a little, so that I could see into his eyes. I wiped his tears away and I saw him look to my lips then back to my eyes.
"Don't cry," I pleaded, rubbing his cheek softly, "okay?"
Once the words were out of my mouth, Harry's lips were on mine. I could feel his passion as he pulled me closer to him, but I pushed him away. He was breathing heavy with shock.
"I, uh..," he stuttered. I stood there only for a moment, in sheer astonishment at what had just happened, my mind cloudy with thoughts. I turned and basically ran back inside and to the table. I saw that Niall was already done his food and I went behind him and wrapped my arms around him and whispered, "come with me for a second," in his ear. He turned his head toward me and smiled. The other boys gave us weird glances. Niall stood and I grabbed his hand, leading him to the hallway, knocking on the door to the Family washroom. When no one answered, I opened the door, letting us both in then locked it.
"What are you doing?" He asked cheekily.
I just hugged him. The tightest I've ever hugged anyone in my whole life. He hugged back, nuzzling his head in my neck. Just like Harry did. I turned my head just a little towards him, and he copied me, and just like that, we were locked in the most intimate, passion-filled kiss. Granted, it was in a washroom, but it didn't change the emotion running through us. We broke the kiss, and just kept holding each other.
"You're killing me," he whispered.
"I swear I'm not trying to," I joked.
He smiled, "Do you wanna go? Just us two?"
I nodded, "I want you all to myself."
He unlocked the door and led us both out and back to the boys, where Louis winked at us both and Zayn and him laughed, while Liam and Harry pretended not to notice us. Niall put some money on the table and told them we were leaving.
"Score, Niall!" Louis shouted.
"Shut up!" We both joked to him.
He took my hand and we left, walking around downtown. We told jokes and played around with each other.
"Let's go in here!" Niall jeered, pulling me gently into a small shop, full of different clothing, shoes and jewelry. I giggled at his excitement. Niall went toward the jewelry and I went for the shoes. I had a thing for shoes. And by "thing" I obviously mean addiction. I tried on a few pairs, but I put them all back, sadly. I walked around and looked at the clothes, loving the style in Ireland. I wanted to buy most of the things in the store, but I didn't really need them. Damn. I was looking through some t-shirts when Niall put his hands on my shoulders.
"Find anything?" He asked.
"Tons. Too bad I'm poor," I joked.
He laughed, but took my hand and we left the store. He swung our hands back and forth playfully as we walked through town and into the outside country area. We walked along a brick fence that held in beautiful green scenery.
"I'm really happy," he said randomly.
I stopped and turned to him and smiled, "me too."
He smiled his beautiful smile in return and reached and pulled me toward him by my neck, giving me a sweet kiss. He pulled me into him, our bodies connecting in a gentle hug.
"You have to leave soon," I stated.
"I know," he breathed, "I'm gonna go crazy missing you."
I smiled, "I may have you beat there."
He pulled back and reached into his pocket, revealing a very small black pouch. I looked at him with confusion, but he just smirked. He opened it up and told me to turn around, which I did.
"Close your eyes."
I closed them and I felt a cool material touch me.
"Open them," he whispered.
I looked down and saw a four leaf clover dangling from a silver chain, wrapped around my neck. I twirled it around my fingers and tears threatened my eyes. He rubbed my shoulders gently, "are you alright?"
I nodded slowly, and he kissed my cheek.
"So you won't forget me if we make it through. I want everyone to see that and know you're mine."
"I wouldn't be anyone else's."
I thought back to Harry kissing me outside the pub and my stomach twisted with nerves. His eyes went to the ground and he sighed, but looked up at me with happiness.
"Good, because I'd have to hurt any guy that comes after you."
My stomach twisted more at the thought of the kiss earlier. The kiss that would ruin everything for Niall if he found out.
"Just you and me," I told him.
He looked at his watch and his smile dropped, "we should head back."
I grinned sadly, "yeah."
He took my hand and laced our fingers together, and we began walking back home. I gripped his arm with my free hand, not wanting to be far from him for not even a minute. The walk home took a little over a half an hour, but once we made it home, we had to separate, to keep up appearances with Mum and Dad. He opened the door and Mum basically drowned Niall in a hug.
"Oh, baby boy! We're so proud of you!"
He'd clearly told her about X-Factor.
He groaned playfully, "thanks Mum!"
"When are the boys picking you up?"
"In a couple hours."
At the sound of his words, my heart dropped about 10,000 feet. Niall looked back at me and I smiled my best fake smile. Mum let go of Niall and stepped excitedly toward me.
"Oh, honey, that necklace is beautiful! Where did you get it?"
Before I could answer, Niall jumped right in, "I bought it for her, Mum."
She looked back at the sound of his words, but smiled in return at me. She pinched his cheek playfully and poked me in my side.
"That's very beautiful of you, Niall."
He smiled in response to her.
"Time to pack," he stated, ushering me toward the stairs by pushing on my back.
We went in his room and he proceeded to pack a duffle full of clothes as I sat on the bed. I watched his every move, as he placed piles of clothes in the bag. I played with the necklace Niall gave me as he worked like a busy bee. I thought about the loneliness I was going to have to suffer through at home, and at school. Without any of the boys to rescue me from myself. Niall smiled sweetly at me as he finished packing and zipped up his bag. He tossed it on the floor and came and sat in front of me.
"Almost time to leave," I told him.
"Yeah," he grabbed my hands, "I'm going to miss you. I'm going to call you every night."
"I'll be waiting for those calls," I smiled.
He leaned in and we kissed. I held him close to me, letting my emotions pour into the kiss. He held my waist and his hands slipped under the hem of my shirt. I mimicked his actions as he begged for entrance in our kiss, to which I happily obliged. Our lust turned to passion as we collapsed on the bed. He groaned into the kiss as I rubbed my hands over his chest.
"Wait, wait," he whispered, breaking the kiss.
"Yeah?" I breathed, actually thanking God we stopped.
"I need to tell you something."
My heart raced about a million times faster as Niall looked straight into my eyes. Oh sweet jesus, was this it? Was he going to tell me he loves me? I don't know, he could honestly tell me some random fact about farming for all I know. My brain raced, coming up with millions of answers to any statement that he could possibly say.
"Okay," I answered.
"I.."
I gulped hard, searching his eyes for any hint to prepare myself for whatever he was going to say.
"Stay with me."
And just like that, my heart sank. I had built up in my mind that Niall was going to tell me such explosive words that it would set off bombs inside of me.
"You're leaving me," I countered.
He hung his head for a second but re-connected his eyes to mine.
"I want to stay, but I have to do this."
I shook my head, "I know, I know. I'm sorry."
"It's okay."
"Niall! Liam and the boys are here!" Mum shouted.
Our eyes stayed connected, but I felt my eyes tear up. We stood up and he picked up his bag. He opened the door and waited for me to join him.
"I uh, I think I'm gonna stay up here."
He looked hurt, and tried to come toward me, but I backed away.
"I don't think I can see you leave. I just, I can't."
"Sweetheart..," he cooed.
"Go, it's okay. I'll um.. I'll be here if you guys come back."
The way I phrased my words even caught me off guard. He put his hand on my waist and kissed me gently.
"I'll be back soon," he whispered, and then, he was gone. I stood at his door frame, hearing him say good-bye to Mum, Dad and Jonathon, and then the door closed and the house was silent.
"What the hell am I doing?" I said dryly to myself.
I bolted out of the room and down the stairs, pushing past Mum and Dad, and opened the door. Liam and Harry were just closing the trunk, and Niall was in the backseat.
"Niall!" I shouted, sprinting to the end of the driveway. He turned his head and opened the door as quickly as he could. I flung my arms around him, and held him as tight as I could, my tears spilling over my eyelids. I wiped them away, because the last thing I want him to see from me, is my blood-shot eyes.
"Thought you didn't want to see me leave?"
"I couldn't. I care too much to have a crappy good-bye."
Zayn and Louis got out of the car and were standing behind Niall, smiling at us. I returned the gesture.
"Group hug!" Louis shouted, crashing into Niall and I. Zayn and Liam joined in. Harry was hesitant, but he eventually hugged us too.
I let go of Niall and individually hugged the guys. Louis spun me around during our hug, which made me laugh. I was going to miss his childish humor. Zayn hugged me like a loving brother would. Simple, but meaningful. Liam hugged me so tight that I thought my circulation was going to be cut off, but he kissed my cheek, keeping the contact for a few seconds. When we pulled away, Harry was on the opposite side of the car, opening the door.
"Harry," I stated shyly. He looked up, but quickly looked away, bouncing awkwardly on his heels. I could tell all the other boys were watching this weird display. I walked over and grabbed Harry by the back of his neck, hugging him tight. He hesitantly held my waist, but melted soon into the hug. I patted his back twice and we let go. The boys all said their good-bye's and piled into the car, leaving Niall and I alone.
I felt my eyes water again and I swore under my breath, making him laugh.
"It's okay, Lezile."
"I don't want me crying to be how this good-bye goes," I wiped at my eyes.
He held the four leaf clover necklace in his hand and give it a kiss.
"Come here," he cooed.
We hugged tight and I felt his body tighten around me. That's when I realized, it wasn't just me who was upset about him leaving. All this time he'd been saying it, but I'd been the one who'd been obvious about it, with all my tears. The sun was setting and it cast a delicate glow over the scene playing out between us.
"Niall.. we gotta go," Liam said quietly.
He nodded to him and looked back to me. We kissed, and for that one moment, everything seemed okay. Once we broke apart though, everything was back to a blur. A blur of loneliness to come. We let go of one another, and he opened the car door, sliding in next to Harry. He looked behind me, waving to Mum, Dad and Jonathon, who were now aware of our little sibling relationship. His eyes met mine and he didn't even try to fake a smile, and neither did I. Liam started the car and pulled away from the curb, taking away the five boys who meant everything to me, and the one who I adored with everything I had. Niall looked out the back window until the car rounded a corner and vanished out of sight.
I stood there for a few minutes, not knowing what to do now. I know we'd text, and he'd call, but I couldn't help but feel empty. Broken, almost. I made my way back to the house, quietly pushing past the Family at the door, and walked up the stairs to my room. I closed the door and locked it. I shut off the lights, and crawled under the covers, clenching the four leaf clover in my hand.
That night, I cried myself to sleep.
Okay! So the boys are gone, for now anyways. I hope you guys are liking this story! Cause I'm having fun writing it :) And honestly, if you have ANY suggestions on what you think I should add in, feel free to leave a review telling me, or inbox, so its a surprise ;) I have SO many ideas for the next chapters, so don't worry, if you want to keep reading, you'll get to.
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Thanks guys! Xx :)