AN: Sorry for being a little bit overdue. I don't have an excuse. XP Well, here's some moldy thank yous to my chapter 10 reviewers! PrincessScissors (Yay! It used to be a lot easier, I don't know why they changed it...I think they're cute, too!), KNDFOREVER (Thanks so much! That means a lot to me.), numbah435spiritsong (M&Ms? Life Savers? Smarties? Skittles? I hate Skittles. I don't know why, I just hate them so much...), Numbah1999 (DSI XL seems to make your spelling 100% worse...XDD), leafysummers (Lame jokes make my lame day. 8p), Shamy4Evar8 (Stubborn Wally is stubborn!), Ajir (Ooh, interesting pretext...:3 Good luck with your exams!) and Shiningheart of ThunderClan (You have no idea how true that's going to be...:3 Also – Warriors! Excellent username.).

Thanks guys! 3

I have one word to summarize this chapter: DRAMA. Damn, it's choc-full of it. It's kind of ridiculous. So much just thinking and crazyness. But it's bound to happen sooner or later...the recent chapters have been much too light. XD (They're on the moon base here, btw, in the middle of some awesome battle.)

EDIT: Fixed the typos. :) They were bothering me more than you can ever know.

Disclaimer: Owning KND is like trying to capture the wind...I HAVEN'T PULLED IT OFF YET.

29 Tries

Attempt #11: The Choice

How did we end up like this?

Numbuh Four is dangling, held by nothing more than my hand in his and the rest of me that's wrapped around the twisted metal railing of the skywalk. The sounds of combat are muted, though lasers and rubble continue to rain down all around us in showers that splinter my skin and bury debris in my hair. I can't pay attention to any of that; all there is is Wally, the life I'm holding in one hand.

Our gazes lock; he realizes he's not falling anymore. Some unpredictable wind, brought on by some collapsing structure or exploding vehicle, buffets past us and stirs up our hair. I can see his eyes now; they're wide for a moment before something relaxes, or closes up. He recognizes who I am. He recognizes someone he trusts one hundred percent. I wonder who else is there besides me.

We stay still like that for a moment, staring at each other without thinking much at all.

"H-hey..." It's like his voice is right in my ear, I know it so well. "Any chance you could pull me up?" He tries to pull off a grin, but panic frays it at the edges and invades his eyes. His expression is crumbling like the platform beneath my feet, and I find the former more concerning. The bravado I've so well associated with everything he is begins to fall apart, and I can see that he's scared.

This throws me, though it really shouldn't have.

I'm trying to hold on, I really am, but I can feel him slipping. My shoulder feels sore and wrenched from catching him mid-freefall, and I can feel bruises beginning to rise from where my arm is braced against the edge. Sweat dribbles down the back of my neck as I pull, more desperately than I care to admit, but he barely moves at all.

"I'm trying," I scream at him, frustration eating up my insides. My arms are shaking. I can't pull him up. But I can't let him go, either.

I won't let you die.

We're suspended, frozen; in more ways than one. I'm struck by the similarities between our current situation and the 'playing pretend' that has been layered between us for years; pretending words and feelings don't exist. In that way, we've never been able to move forward.

This isn't the time to be thinking about things like that, I remind myself. This isn't about you and Wally. This is about life and death; his.

He's still slipping, and I can't hold on. My eyes are locked on his and he sees it too; I see the realization in his eyes and the reflection of my hysterical face. I feel his fingers tighten around my wrist.

I start crying, then, and I don't know if it's for him or for me or for 'us' or just for the incredible lack of strength in my arms. Tears drip down my cheeks and fall over the edge; I wonder morbidly if it's them or Wally who would hit the ground first.

"Kuki."

His voice is stronger, and I sniff and try to blink away the blur tears leave in my vision. I want to at least see him.

"Kuki, there's something I want you to know, okay?"

I recognize the pretense, but not the inflection. Where was the nervousness, the blushing, and the awkward reaching for my hand? Wait; he was already holding it. The thought was bittersweet.

All I can do is shake my head. This wasn't what I wanted. This wasn't how I wanted it to happen.

"Kuki...from the moment I met you, I tho-"

"No!" I burst out. This wasn't the time, it wasn't the place. He was supposed to tell me with candlelight and a nervous stutter. His hands were supposed to sweat and rake nervously through his hair. I was supposed to be able to say it back and for it to mean something.

Holding hands wasn't the same when letting go meant saying goodbye.

"I can pull you up!" I try to assure him, squeezing words around the lump in my throat. "You'll be fine, so just...shut up!"

"I'm not-"

"Shut up! You don't get to be the calm one!"

He's always been my hero; why can't I be his, just this once?

Because my arms are shaking and my muscles are straining and I know I can't hold him much longer. I can't save him, and that hits me hard.

The world shifts. Something above comes loose, and the platform drops forward in a sudden and gut-clenching lurch. For a frightening moment, it's freefall, before something catches and everything slams to a bone-jarring stop. I crash bodily onto the floor, jarring every angle of my tensed body. Pain pulses in my temples, but I stay taught. The skywalk sways dangerously, then holds. I take a moment to register both my hands; one around the railing, one around Wally's. I sigh in relief, the breath hitching in my throat. We're still safe, but not for much longer.

"Kuki..."

His voice is deceptively gentle, and I make the mistake of opening my eyes. He comes into focus, sturdy and resilient to the end.

"It's gonna fall. You gotta go," he says.

My eyes bulge. I can't believe he's actually saying something so dramatic and cliché. 'Save yourself and leave me to die'; that wasn't something that happened in the Kids Next Door. Yet his eyes were steady on me, steeled so stubbornly in determination. There was fear there, too, but he was beyond that as he had always been.

I'm shaking my head no.

His face shifts into something I recognize; stubborn, stupid anger. "Kuki, you're gonna have to let go with one of those hands, and I ain't gonna let it be the other one!"

I tighten my grip, sobs shaking me more than his deadweight. "That's not fair! Why do you get to save my life if I can't save yours?" I wail.

The silence sits, and I realize he doesn't have an answer. Wally's eyes blaze at me and I glare right back through my tears; it turns out we're both as stubborn as ever. The skywalk gives an ominous creak.

This doesn't escape Wally, and his expression softens. He looks away, down, into the abyss.

"Kuki, please..."

Please. The word, shaking with vulnerability, is so foreign coming from him, and I feel like I would have laughed on a normal day. Instead, I choke on a sob. Firsts are so worthless at this point.

"Wally...Wally, I can't. It's not fair..." I blubber.

"I know."

"I don't want y-you to die..."

"Me neither."

I sniff. That seemed like a moot point. "Then why-"

"You know why."

I pause, and it seems like everything around us stops as well. My mind is wiped clean, and I can't perceive anything but him. He looks up at me, all his grit, kindness, bravery, trust, strength, ferocity, self-sacrifice, and...everything...clear on his face. My voice echoes as the only thing in the world, unremarkable in its frailty.

"Wally..."

Noise bursts like a bubble and explodes all around us; laser fire, rocket trails, the thrashing of metal on metal, and a chorus of very familiar voices.

"Numbuh Three/Numbuh Four!"

Zooming toward us through a backdrop of space is the S.C.A.M.P.E.R., the remaining faces of Sector V intense behind the wheel. Hope flares in my chest, intense as anything I've ever felt, and I sob with relief.

We're okay. We're going to be okay. No one has to die.

Wally squeezes my hand one last time, as if sealing the moment. I look at him, but his face is turned, calling toward the approaching ship, "About time you guys got here!"

They pull up below us and open up the roof hatch. Numbuh Five's braid flashes in the opening and I let go with no remorse, trusting in the safety of the hull as we both tumble into it.

We land in a tangle of limbs, too adrenalized to feel pain. It could have been much worse.

But there was no time to relish life, and no time for us to catch our breath or enjoy the solidity of the floor beneath our feet. Numbuh One is shouting out orders as the ship comes about to launch an attack, sparing barely a glance at us to ensure we were in one piece. Such is war, I guess.

I stand on shaky knees, just perceiving Wally's hand supporting my elbow before it's gone. He jumps into his seat and starts tweaking controls, barking out command sequences. I watch his back pensively, wondering if anything has changed.

No. I know him better than that. The terror and hopelessness of the scene on the skywalk, and the sense of closeness I had with him, is finished. Chapter closed; it's only a memory.

He may be content to forget, but I've never been that simple-minded, despite what I've led everyone to believe. I want to remember the sound of his voice, the raw honesty and the passion that softened its harsh tones.

It was the most terrifying thing I've ever experienced, but I'm strangely glad for it as well. Maybe we haven't moved forward, but I at least got to see something new. I always knew I could count on him, and maybe now he knows he can count on me, even though I didn't do what he asked.

We got lucky. I was saved from having to make a choice. I escaped responsibility, and it makes me feel...I don't know. I feel like I cheated, even though everything turned out okay. Maybe it's because Wally had been able to choose so quickly. I'm competitive that way.

"Numbuh Three, man the defenses!" I snap out of my reflection. There would be time for that later. I dash to my station and strap myself in, letting my fingers fly over the controls and do what I do best.

But in the back of my mind, I'm still considering.

If I had to make that choice again, I mean, really make it, and live with the consequences, I can't help but wonder...

What would I choose, and what kind of person would it turn me into?

AN: Meh ending. I couldn't get it right. XP Hey, have any of you noticed how attractive the review button is looking these days...? :D

Tickle that toast.