So this is the end of Seeing Red. For now... Hehehe I decided to make a sequel entitled: Hold Onto the Intensity

This story has been an emotional roller coaster for me and so much fun to write. I thank everyone who put it on their alert list. Everyone who reviewed. Thank you all for the support and when the sequel comes out I hope that you'll continue to support it. The sequel will include:

*Lucas Hume's awakening and massive change.

*Kassia's fate with the alpha Darley.

*Billy Darley's chance of living or dying.

*If Nick Hume survives.

*If Rowan will choose to go after Nick himself now. (If he survives of course ;))

*Owen's final plan set in motion.

*If Kassia regains her freedom or not. Owen was the evil eye as you shall find out more on.

Disclaimer: I do not own the lyrics in this chapter. They belong soley to Sarah Mclachlan. Song: Hold On (Alternate piano version) No copyright intended! Oh and I take no claim in the first few lines of the lyrics I used via Nick's POV. They belong to the band of Pilot Speed. No Copyright intended!

Chapter 9: He Says You're Sentence Pt. 2

Fear. Desperation. Passion. Vengeance. Sex. Lies. Video. Red light. Death. Life. Birth. Friendship. Brotherhood. Parents. Control. Power. Feelings. Interest. Hobbies. Danger. Sweet scents. Love. Lust. Murder. Innocence. Emotions. Alcohol. Breath. Taste. Touch. Smell. Hearing. Sins. Sinners. Heaven. Hell. Silence. Voice. Heat. Cool. Air. Water. Earth. Fire. Sun. Stars. The moon. Future. Hope. Tomorrow. Betrayal. Loyalty. Bonds. Body. Mind. Heart. Soul. You. Me. Fall. Winter. Spring. And summer. Family. Blood. Red midst.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Those were just words. Yet they held so much meaning to the universe, to my world. To everyone I think? My heart was beating theatrically out of my chest. I couldn't hang on to the turning of my insides. It was all coming down now. I chose to go back and though Rowan had tried to prevent me from doing so, begging. He failed. I had to face this because it would never go away. I wasn't going out this way. Rowan still hadn't known why I wanted to go back. I'd given him it was for Luke and my family. He believed it. Only because he knew how I felt to some extent.

We both felt fucked up. His breathing was ragged. I'd imagined all of them had the same breathing problems with all of this. Constant messes and fears in life. From now on I'd feel it too. If every man was like the one who'd raped me. Who I could trust and who I couldn't. This feeling turning inside of my gut and numbing my legs made me feel that the betrayal was far from over. How could there be more when there wasn't anyone left?

I looked next to me at a distant and fearful eyed Rowan. What was his real last name? What else could he be hiding? But if he was betraying me than I was putting my life on the line for nothing. Yet there was still a visible purpose, but why couldn't I see? Over all of this red I suppose. My heart and even my head were telling me to protect Rowan. My conscience was trying also to protect myself. Something I wasn't as used to doing as I thought I would be. You never know how you are going to feel in a situation, which cost you everything. You can't even imagine. Nothing sweet or rebellious about it!

Billy Darley....

It's hard and cold. And as fascinatingly beautiful as he was I couldn't stop the fear from flowing through my veins. Or the hate!

Hold on hold on to yourself

For this is gonna hurt like hell

Hold on hold on to yourself

You know only that time can tell

What is it in me that refuses to believe

This isn't easier than the real thing

Everything was a tangled us mess. A web weaved of acid destruction and my adrenaline was in over drive and each block we drove each centimeter of the road we covered. It was kicked up to an extreme notch. The blood was running so hot I could feel my face near explosion. My veins were pulsing. My legs and in between them were aching from the last day. Night had fallen and two hours had passed since we left. Being inside the home that became a fucked up house and then back to a home just in the wee hours of the preventable massacre...

My love you know that you're my best friend

And that I'd do anything for you

And my love let nothing come between us

My love for you is strong and true

Am I in heaven

Or am I at the crossroads I am standing

My guilt kept sweeping up to me should've telling someone about my dad's plans. But I missed him so much. I leaned my head against the window as an array of memories came flooding back.

Just like he taught Luke and Brendan. But me receiving it first.

"Daddy I can't I'm scared." The pink bike covered in flowers and medium size streamers, brand new at that. It was bigger than me and my six-year old form. I was wobbly as he took the training wheels off.

"Yes, yes you can Kass. Just. Here look," He paused hopping on the bike making me giggle and mom laugh as that familiar camera shook. "Come on baby hop on you can do it I know you can." He hoisted me up and onto the bike.

"Two feet first on the pedals Kass." I did as instructed and he held onto the bike.

"Don't let me go Daddy." He smiled warmly at me and gave my mom a wink and she returned it with a thumbs up. He pushed my seat and held on as the wind swept my pigtails in his face making him cough. I laughed and she shouted. "Peddle Kass. Peddle!" I pushed and the bike was moving on it's own two wheels and my feet. "Daddy! I'm doing it!" I shouted.

He clapped from the distance. I skidded the bike to a halt as he grabbed me from it and swung me around. "Yes! My daughter is an official bike riding ass kicker." I giggled and leaned into him. The smell of mints.

That familiar smell that Dad always carried. Made me know it was my Dad who was coming home and out of the other side to me. It changed to all of the time Brendan and I spent together. The memories kept hitting me like a bitter backwash and my heart started burning. I placed my hand over my chest as the choke swallowed my throat and captured my voice. I closed my eyes as fresh tears slipped. After a long emotionless drought. Rowan looked at me from the corner of his eye and his face changed into immediate pain. It was raining again. The day had gone fast. You can get a lot of things done in one day.

2005. My sweet sixteen and the silk dress that had covered me. Dad was taking my pictures and even Brendan couldn't ruin this moment. I smiled as he held my hand. "I love you. So grown up." I could see his eyes redden. He never cried. "Dad come on don't." I blushed. My mom wrapped her arms around my shoulders and smiled her trademark smile towards my father. "Our baby is all grown up and freshly sixteen. No one can take away from you, your accomplishments Kassia Maria Hume." He engulfed me in a hug with mom. "Come here byatch." Brendan smiled. I wrapped my arms around him and Luke.

"My assish brothers." I laughed as Dad clicked the camera to record. "Every Hume smile now."

I wrapped my arms around Brendan and Luke. "Say cheese dicks." I laughed loudly. Brendan smiled genuinely and Luke chuckled. "Say cheese it Racker Ball." My brows rose before Brendan started chuckling and covered his nose with his thumb and pointer finger pulling away. The serious picture/film taken away as he laughed and Luke fell onto the grass picking up little daises and throwing them. "A princess from far away land. I bid you a farewell in the balls of hell." He growled holding onto his stomach. I stomped my heel as Brendan fell to his knees.

"Wipe that smirk off your face jackass." I smirked myself.

"Like your new nickname Kass?" He laughed.

"You better quit it before I shove a daisy up your white tiny sunburned ass Brendan Alexander Hume. You too Lucas Michael Hume. Typical male species."

"Formal wear. Fuck-"

"Ok, enough now!" Mom scolded. "I'm getting the keys and you all behave yourselves. We weren't brought up to curse were we?"

Brendan, Luke and I looked to one another before we all snorted and resumed into chorus laughter. Dad smiled and shook his head as Mom placed her hands on her hips. Finally giving up she went inside and Brendan followed, slapping Luke in the back and man wrestling began. I rolled my eyes. Dad came over and hugged me, patting my arm. "Kass." He laughed. "You know I love you. And no matter what if someone ever hurts you or this family then I won't stop until they're dead. You understand me?" I nodded as he hugged me.

"I'm so proud of you. My oldest and she'll come the farthest. When I walk you down the isle and incorporate my son and law to Senior VP. " I smiled and grinned from ear to ear as he hugged me. That moment was mine.

*~*

Dad only had eyes for me. I was the daughter that day. I played that piano. Played my heart out. Rowan had smiled and they had liked him then. Luke and Brendan watched in silence with smiles and agape mouths. Kellian was silent. Mom and Dad sat. Her hand on his and they smiled at me every few seconds as my nerves came in. Their smiles washed it away, even Brendan's. It all fell sour when he let it go to his head and Dad right with it.

So now you're sleeping peaceful I lie awake and pray

That you'll be strong and tomorrow see another day

And we will praise it

And love the light that brings a smile across your face

Oh god if your out there won't you hear me

I know we've never talked before

I could still hear the laughter and piano. The rain against the glass and the wash of it being sloshed up by cars passing. There lives. I hope they hold on forever to at least one good thing. They'll never know how much it means to them until it's gone. For good. Forever. Eternity far off. Or not. I didn't know if I was going to live or die. If Luke's future was taken away. Brendan's final chance to see his wrongs and right them. Was Luke meant to be gone? Was Brendan forever going to be an ass hole? Someone that I almost grew to hate and I hated myself for it. I'd trade everything now. Even my own life so they could all make it right. If someone else had died f only I'd pushed. But I wasn't blaming myself for everything because I knew nothing would have stopped my Dad no matter what! And in truth I didn't want to stop him. But he was permanently stopped now. I wanted so badly just to want.

And oh god the man I love is leaving

Won't you take him when he comes to your door?

am I in heaven here or am I in hell

I started to shake with sobs. It sunk in now. I was gone and alone. No family to take future family to. My tears came faster now and I heard Rowan choke next to me. I felt like I was alone in this car. I looked up at the sky. "I want my Daddy." I whimpered. Finally feeling like a small child. I had so much to learn and now I had to do it on my own. Rowan's hand rubbed my jean-covered knee slightly, trying to comfort me. It wasn't phasing me. I was with myself right now...

"Please. Take me if they can come back." I shut my eyes tightly as the tears escaped them. I held on tightly to my shirt and the green pendant that I needed with me. A charm for each emotion I felt held into that one stone. My brothers helped me make the necklace with a stone we found on the beach and carved. I heard Rowan let out an escaped conventional cry. Only it was something that I never knew existed from him, from a person. It was a cry from someone who was deeply in pain. Torn. Beyond any fixing. No purpose.

A hard choice....

At the crossroads I am standing

So now you're sleeping peaceful...

"Please." I cried slipping my head into my heart. My body was bound to the seat tightly as I kept my eyes closed and used all of my strength to hope, wish. To pray once more. I know I don't deserve this. But you can have anything you want. Even me. Just let them live on. Let Rowan be free. Let his brother be ok for him. Rowan's hands were fumbling and he didn't even know if he should touch me or not. He couldn't even pull from his own emotions. The car made soundless turns back to Stokely. Each turn felt like forever. Forever was coming now.

I just wanted all of this to end. I started crying freely. I didn't hold it back. I just let the wash take me over and I slid my head down the cold hard window. Someone let them look over my shoulder. I need them. Please... I begged. My conscience was in tears itself as the waves crashed inside of me and made all of my blood slow down. Every flow slow and patient. The beat of my heart heard like a drum. My tears were like hail. Cold. The conscience came into me and slipped through my body spreading to my desire and stopping it. My body warmed for only one reason now. I wanted my family...

The feeling inside of me was turning with the blowing wind. Rowan never spoke as I rowed my window down and threw my head into the rain. I smelled the fresh oncoming summer's end scent of it. Last remains of the season. New trials were beginning all around. The world turned no matter who left it. But in these brief moments I'd learned that each person in this world means something to at least someone. And that means that almost everyone, but killers and demons mean the world to well the world.

Each time we loose someone, someone else's heart is lost with that person.

No one is winning all the time. And nothing is perfect.

Perfection is overrated.

I heard Rowan row his window down as well as we turned into the last turn we made. It wasn't familiar to me as I was sleeping when Billy took me here. But it felt familiar in some form.

Rowan had tears of his own filling up those beautiful chocolate brown eyes. God I wanted everyone to be able to just breathe. "Rowan I- I love you." I softly cried. My head stayed bowed. "No matter what happens I just want you to know that you're my best friend and nothing changes that. I love you." I finished, keeping my head down, but after a moment I lifted it up on my own. His eyes were softly peaking into mine. And he looked at me, he looked. Just like he was seeing me for real. In this harsh light this rain. I saw him too. And he let the wheel drift with unseen danger as his fingertips softly grazed my shin. Like some last resort of two lovers. Final goodbyes incase the other went out for that one's sake and grace. Keep the fire alive. He lifted my chin up as my tears fell on his fingers, reminding me of glass crashing in slow motion over a set of ivory white piano keys. Somewhere I heard my own music and found my own strength in the lurch that was coming up inside of me. I warmed as Rowan leaned into me. His warmth radiating clearly. So clearly that I melted into him without fear. Letting past scars go for my last moment with him. My best friend. Who I was giving my life for without second thought. And I loved him. After all of this time the last gift my conscience had given me was that I was in love with Rowan...

He leaned into me and the sweet heat of his soft gracious lips fell against mine in their own rhythm. We kissed as if there was nothing between us, but love and need. Need gone unnoticed all of these years until now. I felt not scared, but felt my heart giving in and sowing up a little slice that Billy had taken away, but that I'd buried. My conscience wasn't talking right now and I knew that I was becoming one with it for now... I let his tongue touch mine and it all fell in synch. Those fireworks came inside of my head. The kind that warmed you from head to toe. I never wanted to let go. And the tears came from need and longing of the realization. Meaning of more. He pressed his forehead against mine. His own tears and scent into the mix. The feeling was circling us together in a circle of red. The kind that binds you together.

No words were needed as of now....

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I moved swiftly to the last room draped with purple curtains. Moving into it, it was lit with red. A chapel? I'd finally reached the

End of that place that fucker had driven me to after I'd forced it from him. I'd killed someone else and four more others. I couldn't shake Helen's way of balancing things out away and her being torn from me. Her essence banished made my blood boil. I made my way through the curtains pointing my gun and I heard nothing. I moved around and I heard footsteps as I turned back around. I turned behind me quickly with my hands locked to the trigger. But it came from in front of me. There stood that bastard and he fired into my side making my body shake as the soaring metal shredded me again. The pain was numbed for now and I fired off shooting until I got him in the side and his hand, dropped the gun. I rounded off with no self control on the firearm and let loose on my target finally in front of me.

I shot a round off and it hit his fingers making them disappear. A footstep came quickly behind me and I felt the ache in my neck making me twist. I held tightly onto the gun fighting this out and shot right at his leather cap covered head. He fell to the ground. Billy shot at me once more and I shot off again hitting him in the front of his chest. He fell to the ground and I held onto my neck stumbling over to the bench and hitting it with a harsh force.

His screaming died down and he pushed himself up. If he finished me off now I wouldn't care. But I doubt he could even see straight. Which is what I was fucking hoping for. He pointed his gun at me with his teeth grit. He fired off making me jump as he hit the top of the bench beside me. He fired again and hit the wall coming towards me he clicked his gun, but nothing came out and I knew this was it for me. My voice fought inside. That cool metal object tucked behind me underneath my eldest son's coat.

He stumbled towards me and hit the spot a lot rougher than I had.

We sat in silence and he sighed. I held my neck. Nothing needed to be said for now. The ones that started this all were here now. I won the war. But both of us were left empty handed. I could see him turn to me from the corner of my eye. Which was slightly faltering with a blur. His face had slight blood splatters. "Look at cha' you look like one of us. Look what I've made you." He sounded so sure of himself. He had the power and he knew it was right.

He kept letting gust of air from his mouth. Burst of pain. "You know?" He spoke. "Your daughter was somethin'. So beautiful. Fucking beautiful." He leaned his head back. Kass. My eldest of all. Where was she? I didn't need to ask. He'd dumped her somewhere. He leaned his head back in pain. The veins pulsing in the top of his head as he held his fingers. I felt the warmth seep through my left hand and onto my golden band.

I couldn't wait any longer. Not talking to give him the satisfaction, but I knew what he was feeling. It wouldn't balance was still in there. The gun. Nameless as I'd forgotten. Only what I needed to remove with them clear. I slapped it to my leg and turned. His head swayed downward. He knew it was coming. He looked to me his tired eyes switched into knowing. I felt small pain and remorse for him. Out of all of this I'd learned the true meaning of pain and remorse.

I clicked the gun.

And tonight I lack the strength to even move

when you walked, and watched me die

But I know this is harder for you

for love has let you down

Yeah, come on...

"Ready?" I spoke simply. He looked to me. He waited and bowed his head before blowing another gust of air out. He stopped slowly and I let him have his moment. For some reason I'd stopped from where the gun's general direction headed. I pointed it to his chest and fired. He fell silent. And I knew he'd not have much longer. I sat there with him in that moment as his breathing slowed down.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The kiss had ended as we walked anxious and so fierce full. Rowan stopped short as he saw a door open on our way up. "Kass don't look just incase all right?" I nodded and held onto his hand tightly. Rowan made tiny steps before finally he made a gasp and turned back quickly. I leaned up and covered my mouth as the remains of what was that Latino man scattered the wall. I covered my mouth as the vile venom crept up it.

"Oh god. Fuck."

Rowan's eyes were wide as he saw a phone that lay on the ground. "Bodie." He voice alerted me with high fear. "Kass the office my brother." I nodded, "C-come on then."

We were both filled with adrenaline as we neared dark alleys. Everything forgotten except for the now. Rowan pulled in and we both gasped. A tan van was completely apart and the red mustang was smashed and steaming into the front steps. The light was now pouring from the cloud. "Oh my god." We heard the screeching of tires and the black tribal swerved right past us. Rowan pulled me back. But the face inside the front of it. Oh god. And Rowan's eyes widened with mine. The person was holingonto their neck and they had no fine sight of us, but we saw him. My heart jumped and the daylight made me look up. 'Daddy!" I screamed. "Wait Daddy."

"Kass. Kass!" Rowan screamed. "We don't know if that was him."

"Rowan it was I saw he's he. My Daddy Oh god." tears filled my eyes and I covered my mouth. He pulled on my hand. "Stay behind me." I was silent as he pulled me through the mess and up some stairs gasping and quietly making turns. I was in my own trance and I did see my father right? And Rowan saw him too?

We neared a place that draped out red light and it was then my senses came back. My tears started flowing freely again. We stepped into the curtain as Rowan started shouting and I saw someone lying below us. I squeezed his hand once before dropping it. Bodie.. My heart reved up with a familiar ache. His brother. The one that tried to help me some. The one that gave me a reassuring smile. Held my brother, but not as hard as he could have. Rowan shouted and let out a yelp of pain that brought the tears from my body and soul. I covered my mouth and saw a figure slumped in front. I walked up quickly and saw Billy there. Holding his bloody fingers with his other hand and blood was pouring from him in three spots.

His chest was heaving and he looked pale. Not much left inside of him. The revenge was finished. My dad did all of this. He was alive and he was ok. I knew it was going to be all right again. And with strength I walked over as his eyes bore into mine. He didn't have any remarks left. A shout made my face shake with fury and tears. My dad had taken Bodie from Rowan. Billy's eyes were covered with pain and the blue had water and his face splattered with blood. His own. I turned as Billy saw Bodie on the floor and shook his head. His eyes fell into mine and I could see it tearing him apart inside. "No. My brother. No. God no. Man. No. No. No." Rowan's sobs were pitiful and gut wrenching. He fell to the floor clutching his brother's front.

"I wanna fuckin' die." Billy mumbled in pain.

It made the tears pull from the inside of me. "He won didn't he? Oh god." I cried. I walked over to Rowan slowly. I bent down as he cried over his brother. His deep husky voice sounded like a dying painful hell. I fell to my knees and rubbed Bodie's hand as I hugged onto Rowan and I glanced back as Rowan threw his head down into Bodie's chest and into my thigh. I shook my head at Billy as the tears poured from me silently. His eyes came in contact with mine again. "He won." He simply stated. The pain clear. I turned my head to the side and started to let my lip quiver. His simple, yet so indescribable eyes fell into mine once more. Everything stopped and all I saw was some lonely boy who was finally torn apart. Nothing to loose. And for the first time I felt my heart give out for him. I offered a small sad smile and he nodded before leaning his head into the wood and closing his eyes.

Hold on hold onto yourself

for this is gonna hurt like hell