PLEASE read this through. It is extremely, extremely important. I NEVER intended on writing one of these during this story, until some of the reviews I got to the last chapter. Now I feel it necessary.

As those who have read the last chapter know, Bella did not tell Charlie, and Jacob then threw subtle threats at her through him. I got some reviews almost immediately after I posted it, and they really struck a nerve and upset me. I want to say right now that they were not really BAD reviews. They did not criticize my writing, the storyline, etc. They criticized Bella's not telling Charlie. Looking back at them - they do not upset me nearly as much, and if the people who wrote it read this: I am not angry with you, or trying to sound unappreciative of your reviews, I swear. Thank you for reading, and thank you for reviewing. Because I honestly do LOVE reviews - they drive me to write more. I just want to make a few things crystal clear, here, so that this can hopefully be avoided in the future. Please, please stick with me on this. This is hard for me to write, but I think I need to.

If you haven't read my profile, then I'd like to let you know that I am a survivor of rape/sexual abuse as a child for a lot of years, and was also raped by a trusted friend when I was 16. I am 18 now. As a kid, I never told anyone what was happening to me. I told my parents just before my 16th birthday - 12 years after the abuse had started. I later filed a report on the guy who did it. I still have not told anyone about being raped when I was 16. Nobody, except all you internet land, now. It is difficult trying to understand and work through everything that has happened to me. It has all affected me in nearly every way possible, and I carry so much shame from what I went through that I cannot talk about it, which in turn makes it impossible to completely heal from. It is a vicious circle. I am self-conscious about many things surrounding that; often worrying that people are judging me for what others have done to me. Lately, things have been harder than usual, and it is easy for me to take what someone says about someone else, and see just how much that applies to me. Then I wonder what they would say about me if they knew a certain thing.

Which leads to the reviews and in turn, my writing this. See, the whole reason I began writing this story is because it feels very healing to write. I never planned on putting it on FF until I started and thought "hey, maybe other people would like this.." which led me here. I understand exactly what it is like to be betrayed so terribly, and by someone you trust. Therefore - this story is actually really personal to me. So, when I read reviews of people voicing their disgust/annoyance with Bella for not telling Charlie - it was suddenly no longer about Bella. It was me. Bella hasn't told her father in 3 days and they think she's stupid - and here I haven't told anyone for two years. What does that make me? You have to understand, I didn't realize how much reviews like that would eat away at me when I started this. Also, I am not usually so sensitive to people's words! Again, things have been harder than normal lately, but even so.. it surprised me how much it felt like a direct blow to my situation.

My immediate decision was to pull the story off FF and be done with it. I planned to continue writing, but not posting anything more on here. It was late, so I went to bed, and when I woke up in the morning I had multiple reviews.. All of which felt much more positive. They gave me a sort of renewed inspiration, and I realized how rude it would be for me to just pull the story and leave everyone who has been so nice to me, hanging. The good reviews kept coming, and slowly I decided to simply address the problem with this, and then continue on with the story.

I've had a complete flood of creativity, and had already written half of the next chapter and planned on putting it up that next morning, before this review-drama began. I'll be honest and say that since then, I haven't opened the chapter to edit it or write more. What had felt healing suddenly felt far too raw to touch. Instead, I've been drawing, which I love. It's kind of sad to me that I didn't turn it to my writing, but my heart just wasn't in it(which would have made for bad chapters, anyway!)

So the cut and dried version of this, is:

1) The story WILL continue, but I don't know when the next chapter will be up. Maybe a few days, maybe a few weeks, I'm not sure.

2) Reviews that say things along the lines of "I don't understand why Bella isn't telling Charlie," "It doesn't make sense why she didn't tell her dad," or "I wish Bella would tell someone," etc. DO NOT BOTHER ME AT ALL. At ALL! Please don't misinterpret me and think I am saying all things like that will upset me, that's just not true.

3) I AM going to ask that people please refrain from saying things along the lines of "Bella is such an idiot for _," "Bella's fucking dumb," "If she just told then _ wouldn't happen," etc.

I hope you all realize that the reality of this is that if Jacob hadn't raped her, the threats and problems wouldn't happen. Bella is not at fault for ANY of Jacob's actions. Sentences like those are very victim-blaming. Due to that it's possible, if not highly likely, that other rape survivors will read this, things like that are unacceptable to write here. You may be talking about a fictional story, but someone else may be feeling that it is anonymously aimed at their very REAL situation. I hope everyone understands this!

To all survivors, I simply say this: It was never your fault.

To everyone else: Thank you so, SO much for reading this. Not just this note, but the whole story. Thank you to everyone who reviews, who adds this to their favorites or to their story alerts. Even a huge thank you to everyone who reads this and doesn't review - I appreciate you ALL!

Most importantly to the people who wrote the reviews: I hold no grudges - I am certain you never intended to offend or hurt me in any way. Thank you for pushing me out of my comfort zone and helping me realize a part of myself I need to work on. I honestly appreciate it, now. I think it was an important thing to happen for me, personally.

Everyone, have a wonderful weekend/week! You are all awesome.