OMAKE 1:

SHARPSHOOTER (C)

(Note: When I post either omakes or files from now on, I will be marking them as 'C' for definitely canon to the Ballad of Ricky and Angel, 'PC' for possibly canon, and 'NC' for anything non-canon, but written for fun. I might also include 'AU' for any stories that are alternate tellings of events in Snyder's life)

TRANSCRIPT OF ECHO COMMUNICATION BETWEEN LILITH AND MORDECAI

MORDECAI: Wha? Yeah, yeah, I'm up. Who's callin'?

LILITH: Hey, Mordecai.

MORDECAI: Hey, Lilith, long time no see. Well, talk, anyway. What can I do for you?

LILITH: I want you to do me a favour. I've sent a former Hyperion employee to the Tundra Express.

MORDECAI: Ah, and you want me to ice him, right? Or introduce him to Bloodwing?

LILITH: Actually, no. He came with that group of Vault Hunters who've been making waves over the past few days. You know, the ones Jack failed to kill on his death train. We got into a bit of a fight, but he proved trustworthy enough. Well, he saved my life a couple of times. Problem is, he's also got some sort of batshit crazy Jekyll and Hyde thing going.

MORDECAI: Wait, what?

LILITH: It's called the Sci-Zone. I'm looking it up even now. Very rare disorder. Basically turns him into a hammy mad-scientist. Makes him scarily good at combat, though he's a bit of a wimp outside it. Which, incidentally, is the reason I called you. Take potshots at anything that threatens him. Bandits, Varkids, Skags…

MORDECAI: Okay, got the picture. Don't kill the Hyperion hijo de la puta. Why did you send him here, then?

LILITH: Tina. I know you need to keep close to your spy systems, and with Roland captured by the Bloodshots…

MORDECAI: Whoa, whoa, wait, what? Roland was captured?!

LILITH: Yes. Don't worry, the other Vault Hunters are on their way to get him. Anyway, Tina's been a while without a visit. I've sent this Hyperion doctor to babysit her.

MORDECAI: …You know it might have been more merciful just to let me blow his brains out, right?

LILITH: Mordecai, listen to me. Tina's a good judge of character, you and I know that. If she likes him, then we're good. If he turns out to be a dick, then Tina will sit him down to one of her tea parties. Frankly, the other Vault Hunters seem to trust him enough. If we're very lucky, we not only get someone who wants to take Jack down, but someone with good intel on Hyperion. Once the Hyperion guy gets to Tina, wait a few hours, then go down there to make sure Tina's all right. He's lightly armed: he's got a Maliwan pistol and a Maliwan SMG, though he also has these weird prototype shield grenades.

MORDECAI: What, like the ones in that old video game?

LILITH: Yeah. I really felt it when I used my energy punch. It bruised my hand. He wasn't expecting anything to get through it, though. Anyway, bring an extra sleeping bag and that new shipment of her tea and crumpets to her.

MORDECAI: Okay. Two questions. One, can I shoot near him, put the fear of God into him?

LILITH: Sure, at least till you know for sure. And the second question?

MORDECAI: If Tina does off him, or else if I have to talk to him, what's his name?

LILITH: Doctor Richard Snyder. I've called ahead to Tina about him, so she's prepared.

MORDECAI: Ah, I see him now. Okay, better go. Bye, Lilith.

OMAKE 1 ANNOTATIONS:

Not much to say here, save for that this is the first of a series of omakes or side stories to the Ballad of Ricky and Angel. The canonicity classification system above should be your guide.