Disclaimer: All characters and things from ANGEL and BUFFY belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. If they aren't on the show they belong to me.
Summary: Takes place after "Waiting In The Wings". What if Angel and Cordelia hadn't been interrupted, and how would the outcomes of that one event change the lives of the Fang Gang forever? A/C pairing
CHAPTER 11
Connor was on a mission, clear and simple. He would not be caught by his Uncle Gunn at any cost. The toddler awkwardly wobbled around the furniture of the Hyperion Lobby with his best impersonation of a run, while Gunn slowly chased after him.
It was a game for Connor, one he was getting better and better at. He had gotten his walking down pat over the past month and now all he wanted anyone to do was chase him around. Gunn, being a big kid himself, was always the first to volunteer.
"I'm gonna get you, Connor." Gunn smiled at the fifteen month old, who was grabbing onto the side of the couch for support.
Connor just giggled, although his breath was short, his little lungs getting tired from all of the horse play.
"Okay, that's enough boys." Cordelia emerged from the kitchen, carrying a tray with lunch on it over her huge stomach. She definitely looked five months pregnant. "Lunch time."
Connor clapped his hands and waddled over to the tray Cordelia had put down on the coffee table, picking up the pieces of banana Cordelia had cut up for him. "Ma!" He smiled up at her, proudly showing her the banana slice.
Cordelia smiled at Connor. "Eat that, sweetie."
Connor did so, plunging the piece into his mouth before looking for his cup of milk.
Cordelia watched Connor, slowly easing herself into the couch. She was getting much more tired much faster, the weight of the baby inside of her starting to take a toll, not to mention the kicking it had recently started. She felt like her stomach was a drum set.
"Thanks, Cordy." Gunn held up his sandwich.
Cordelia shook her head. "Fred made that one. Not me. If I had made it, I would have eaten it before I got out here." She joked, although recently she had been eating much more. She attributed it to the fact that she was indeed pregnant, and the stress of looking for Angel. They had been at it for a month, and still no word on him. If it hadn't been for Connor keeping her busy, she was sure she would have lost it by now.
"You look good." Gunn said, taking a seat across from the pregnant seer.
Cordelia shrugged, looking at her stomach. "I look fat."
"You're having a baby, not fat." Gunn told her.
"Yesss!" Connor squealed, carrying the "s" sound through his two front teeth. His vocabulary had grown immensely, and there was no doubt in anyone's mind he was extremely smart.
Cordelia laughed at her son. "Yes? Yes what?"
"Baby." Connor said simply, pointing to Cordelia's stomach with the hand that wasn't full of banana.
Cordelia was at a loss of words for a second, unable to believe what Connor had just said. It brought tears to her eyes, and she damned her hormones for making her so emoitional lately.
"Sad?" Connor asked, pointing to Cordelia's tears.
"No, sweetie." Cordelia pulled Connor up on the couch next to her. "Happy." She put a hand on her stomach. "You knew Mommy had a baby in here?"
"Baby!" Connor grinned, putting his head against Cordelia's stomach. "Hi." He seemed to say to the baby.
Cordelia couldn't help but cry, she pulled Connor into her stomach a little more, so she could hug both him and the unborn child inside of her. She then bent down and kissed Connor's head.
Gunn smiled, taking in the vision of the family in front of him. One thing was missing though, one big, tall, brooding, vampire. Gunn silently made his way up from the couch, moving into the office to see how things were going in the hunt for Angel.
"Gunn." Wesley acknowledged him as Gunn closed the door to his office.
"How's it going?" Gunn asked.
"Its not." Fred sighed, hanging up the phone. "We thought we had him, but it wasn't."
"Angel is a hard vampire to find." Lorne nodded. "I've tried every connection I have across all fifty states. No one has seen him."
"Maybe he isn't in the U.S. anymore." Gunn suggested.
"He must be." Wesley said. "Angel was not about to get on any plane or any boat anytime soon. Too risky for a vampire."
"Not if it's a night flight." Gunn said.
"Still…" Wesley sighed. "We should stay localized until we are sure he isn't here."
"That could take months." Gunn said, looking back out at Connor and Cordelia in the lobby, and then back at Wesley. "We don't have months."
"It will take as long as it takes." Wesley said. "We are trying our best."
"But Cordy…" Gunn just looked down.
"Cordy what?" Cordelia asked, entering the lobby with Connor on her hip. If she wasn't part demon she was sure she wouldn't be able to pick the toddler up anymore with her stomach, but it hadn't really been a problem yet."
"We…uh…" Gunn started. "We were just saying…"
"Look, guys." Cordelia sighed. "I appreciate all the work you are doing looking for Angel, but don't forget we have innocent people to save. Remember the helpless?"
"What are you saying?" Gunn asked.
"I'm saying…" Cordelia took a deep breath. "I'm saying that Angel might not come back, and if he doesn't I want you guys to know I'm going to be okay. I don't want you to worry about me."
"But we will always worry about you, Cordelia." Fred said. "We are all family."
"Well, I mean don't worry extra about me, okay?" Cordelia said. "I mean, Angel will never be far, Connor is here, and this new baby will be here and that's Angel to me. I've accepted that, and I am just grateful to have these two children." She looked at her stomach and then at Connor who was leaning his head against her shoulder. "I'm lucky enough for that."
Everyone understood where she was coming from, but no one was willing to accept it yet.
"We're going to find him, Cordelia." Wesley told her.
Cordelia smiled weakly at Wesley. "I hope so." She then looked back at Connor and her belly, the only things she had left of the vampire with a soul.
Angel made his way back into his dingy hotel room from saving yet another person, this time a small school boy who had been taken capture by a group of demons. He flicked the light on and shrugged his jacket off, revealing a fresh wound to his shoulder.
"Just add it to the collection." Angel touched his wounded shoulder.
This had been going on for about a month now, he would get a note or an address and there he would find someone to save. He had not seen the mystery man since the bellboy incident and it had been eating away at the souled vampire. He knew whoever that guy was, he just didn't know how.
He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and it flipped open to a photo of Cordelia, himself, and Connor on Cordelia's birthday. He studied the picture for a moment, realizing that was about a year ago now. Had he been gone that long?
Angel thought about and realized he had. "Five months…" He counted it in his head. He had been away from his child and the woman he loved for five months. He wondered how Connor was, probably walking by now, and he wondered how Cordelia's pregnancy was going.
Quickly, he closed his wallet, frustrated that he would, more than likely, never know the answers to any of his questions. He would never get to see his son grow, or watch Cordelia become the incredible mother he knew she would be. That was all Groo's privileges now, or so Angel thought. He had no idea Groo was long gone.
Holtz had been right about knowing Angelus like the back of his hand. He had tracked the vampire for years, but he realized now that he did not know Angel. Now he knew Angelus and Angel were not the same vampire.
Holtz had spent the past few weeks moving through Europe, looking for Angel. He had first gone to Rome, knowing how much Angelus had liked it there, but clearly he had been wrong because there had not been a single sign of Angel's presence there. He then moved up, through Germany and France, and now he found himself in Angelus' homeland. He was in Ireland.
Holtz hoped Ireland would bring better luck in finding Angel, but so far it had not. Angel had not been in or around his hometown at all. Now, having no choice, Holtz moved into the city of Dublin, hoping to the vampire.
Holtz made his way into a bar, moving to the counter.
"Can I help you, lad?" The bartender asked.
"I'm looking for someone." Holtz said.
"Aren't we all?" The bartender joked, his brogue thick.
"Have you seen him?" Holtz handed the bartender a picture of Angel.
The bartender studied the picture, and then handed it back to Holtz. "Can't say I have. Sorry."
Holtz nodded, he figured that much. He was about to turn and leave the bar when a woman who had been sitting there stopped him.
"I know him." The woman told Holtz.
"This man?" Holtz pointed to the picture of Angel.
The woman nodded. "He saved me."
"Saved you?" Holtz raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah…from a…a wolf." The woman said.
Holtz nodded. That sounded like Angel. "Do you know where I can find him?"
The woman shook her head. "No. He just kind of showed up, helped me, and then left. Kind of like an angel or something…" The woman seemed to be thinking hard. "An angel who likes to wear black."
Holtz nodded, finding it ironic that the woman had called Angel an angel. "But he is here?"
"In Dublin?" The woman asked. "Well at least I know he was."
"Thank you." Holtz said, making his way out of the bar. The tip was better then nothing. At least he knew he was getting somewhere with his search. Angel had been in Ireland, and Holtz hoped, as he made his way down the street, the vampire still was.
Lilah sighed, sitting at her desk. She had still gotten no word on Holtz or his whereabouts, but the Senior Partners seemed to think the same as she did; it was only a matter of time with Holtz really. Eventually he would show up and eventually they would kill him.
She turned in her chair to find the door to her office opening and Gavin making his way in.
"Can I help you?" Lilah asked the other lawyer, rather annoyed with his presence.
"Cordelia." Gavin said simply. "Angel's seer."
Lilah went back to looking at her computer screen. "I know who she is. What about her?"
"She's pregnant." Gavin said.
"And?" Lilah looked back at Gavin. "So? She got herself knocked up, good for her."
"It's Angel's." Gavin smiled.
Lilah stared at the other lawyer for a minute, unsure if she should believe him. "What do you mean it's Angel's?"
"We have a source, heard something from someone." Gavin said simply. "She is carrying Angel's child."
"Who told you?" Lilah asked.
"Someone overheard that slayer talking. The one in Sunnydale?" Gavin described Buffy. "One of our clients over there heard her tell her friend that Cordelia was pregnant with Angel's child."
Lilah stood. "You're certain?"
"Positive." Gavin said.
Lilah shook her head. "This is not good." And it wasn't. It was just another problem that needed to be taken care of before Angel was found, before he could get back to Los Angeles. Lilah knew they had to figure out a way to get a hold of both Connor and Cordelia now.
Angel had gotten three more notes in the past few days, and all of them had led him to addresses where he had either saved someone or exterminated a demon or vampire clan. He felt good helping the helpess and knowing he was still fighting the mission his family was fighting back in Los Angeles. It also helped to keep his mind off of Cordelia and Connor. Every time he wasn't fighting his thoughts would drift back to them, and he would find himself in another brooding spell.
And that's where he found himself now as he pulled his jacket off, tossing it on the floor. He had been out half the night saving people, and the half he had dedicated to looking for the guy who had been dropping him all the notes. He had done this every night for the past week or so, but so far had had no luck in locating the guy.
As he went to take his shirt off, there was a knock at his door. Angel sighed, pulling his shirt back over his head, and moving to the door. He opened it to find a younger police officer.
"Can I help you officer?" Angel was surprised to see the police at his door.
"Can I come in?" The officer asked.
Angel nodded, moving aside to let the officer in. "Is something wrong?"
The officer smiled at Angel. "Nah, I just wanted to get a reaction out of you."
Angel studied the man infront of him, seeing that same twinkle he associated with the bellboy and others he had seen before. "Is it you?"
"Well, since you don't know who I am, lad, I don't think you can be asking that." The man said. "But yeah, its me."
"I've been looking for you." Angel told him.
"I know." The guy told him. "I've been watching."
"Watching?" Angel raised an eyebrow.
"Part of my job." The man shrugged.
"And what job would that be?" Angel asked.
"To make sure you don't go over the deep end here." The man said. "The Powers are worried about you."
Angel laughed at this. "If they are so worried why did they let this prophecy exsist? Why would they let me kill Connor? Why didn't I get a chance with Cordelia?" Angel was angry.
The man seemed to contemplate what he was going to say. Finally he answered. "There are things going on here that have nothing to do with the Powers. Things I can't tell you about because you're not ready to hear them. But trust me, you're son is safe, and you'll get a chance with the princess yet."
"Princess?" Angel raised an eyebrow. Only a few people had ever called Cordelia that.
"Cordelia." The man said.
"I know who you meant." Angel said, staring the man down. "Who are you?"
"Still can't figure me out?" The man grinned. "Well, you'll know soon enough. Just keep helping the helpless. I won't be seeing you from now on. You'll see me when you're good and ready, then you'll know who I am."
"Wait, what?" Angel was confused.
"Just keeping fighting the fight, boss. Soon enough you'll know who I am, and soon enough this mess with fix itself." The man said, and before Angel could answer vanished.
Angel sat on his bed for awhile after that. He had a feeling he knew who that man was, but he wasn't sure, and he didn't know how much he really cared anymore. He had cared more about knowing that Cordelia and Connor were safe. That little bit of information was enough to sooth the vampire's mind as he drifted off to sleep.
Wesley, Fred, Gunn, and Lorne sat around the lobby of the hotel, rummaging through phonebooks, old files, and any contact information they could find that Angel had stored away. They were hoping he had asked someone to help me stay away from Los Angeles, but so far they had no such luck.
"I hate to be the one to say it…" Fred started. "But do you think Angel might have jumped dimensions? I mean, that way he knew he could never hurt Connor."
Wesley shook his head. "It's unlikely. If he had someone would have heard something about it."
"Maybe we should go to the Powers." Gunn suggested.
"I don't think they are playing for us much anymore." Wesley sighed, putting some papers aside. "Did anyone else notice that Cordelia has been getting less and less visions over the past few months?"
Everyone nodded their head, they had all noticed.
"Maybe they are just giving her a break because the champion isn't here." Fred suggested.
"Or maybe because the champion is dead." Gunn said.
"Gunn!" Fred slapped her boyfriend's arm.
"What? I can't be the only person thinking it." Gunn said. "I mean, Angel loves Connor, more then anything. Knowing that he could possibly hurt him…I don't know."
Lorne nodded. "I have to agree. I've read Angel, his heart belonged to Connor. Well, except for that little bit that belonged to Cordelia, but if he thought he would ever hurt either of them…"
"But would he really kill himself? After all he has worked for? It just doesn't seem right. Plus the prophecy isn't even true." Fred said.
"He doesn't know that." Wesley said. "As far as he is concerned, he is a threat to Connor, and probably the rest of us. If he is alive, he is not anywhere near here. And he probably won't be back anytime soon. I've read plenty on Angelus and I know Angel. If he doesn't want to be found, he won't be."
"Then why are we wasting our time on this?" Gunn said. "If we can't find him, why are we trying to keep everyone's hopes up?"
"Because its Angel." Lorne said.
"But look who is suffering at the cost of us looking for him." Gunn said. "I mean, Cordy can't take this much stress anymore…I don't think she wants to."
"The only thing keeping Cordelia from cracking is the hope that Angel is still out there." Wesley said.
"No." Gunn challenged him. "The only thing keeping her from cracking is Connor and that new baby. Are we going to make her dwell on Angel, when she has so much to look forward to? I mean, she is pregnant, she should be happy about that, and she can't even enjoy it because she feels like she is taking something from Angel if he ever comes back."
"So what do you suggest?" Wesley asked. "We just stop looking?"
"No. Of course not." Gunn said. "We should never stop looking, but we shouldn't devote all of our time to it. We have a business to run, we have to help Cordelia get ready for the new baby, Connor is getting bigger, and the helpless still need us. Angel wouldn't want us neglecting all of that for him and you know it."
Everyone nodded in agreement. They all knew Angel would want them to keep up the work he had started and to take care or Cordelia and Connor, not focus all of their energy looking for him, and that's exactly what they were going to do from now on. If Angel was meant to come back, they all knew he would.
Cordelia had just put Connor down to bed. He had been tired from his adventure today. She had taken him to the mall to shop for the new baby, and all he had wanted to do was go into the toy store and look at trucks.
Cordelia made herself comfortable on the couch with a glass of water and a magazine for expectant mothers. She flipped through the pages, glad for the time alone. It wasn't that she didn't love having Connor around, she did. She was just getting tired between the pregnancy and all of Connor's running around.
Suddenly, Cordelia felt the baby inside of her move. She looked down at her stomach, smiling. "Hey in there, this is not time to start doing gymnastics; I finally got your brother to sleep." She rubbed small circles on her stomach and it seemed to calm the baby down.
"Thanks. Mommy doesn't need to be up all night." She said to her belly. For some reason, she felt obligated to apologize to her unborn baby. "I'm so sorry that you're coming into this world when things are such a mess, and I am sorry you're not going to meet your Daddy." Cordelia looked over at the picture she kept on the coffee table of her, Angel, and Connor. "Your Dad was a good man…pire." Cordelia smiled using Angel's own word for himself.
The baby inside seemed to kick as if it understood Cordelia.
"But, there is a lot of love out here for you. I love you, you're brother loves you, and all of your aunts and uncles love you and we don't even know you yet." Cordelia continued to rub her stomach as she spoke to her unborn child. "And I am going to try and be the best mom I can, okay?"
Cordelia tried to stifle the tears forming in her eyes. She shouldn't be where she was, not at that point in her life. She was so young, and she did not live the kind of lifestyle appropriate for raising children in, especially not alone, not with all the demons and vampires and bad things she knew about. How was she going to do any of it without Angel?
That though continued to plague Cordelia's mind as she cried herself to sleep on her couch.