A/N: I have no idea where this came from. I don't know that I want to know. It's pure comedy, so take it as it is. As I said in my Owning a Goblin King story, I'll be out of the country this time next week, so no updates til I get back. Reviews welcome!
Jareth Interviews a Queen
"Name?"
"Sunshine Stardust Aurora."
"Why are you named after celestial phenomena?"
"I'm a miracle!"
"Next."
"Name?"
"Mary-Jane Hope Williams."
"Next!"
"Name?"
"Beth."
"Why do you want to be Goblin Queen?"
"Because I WUVS OO! She made a grab for his hair, but was quickly restrained and taken away by a pair of Goblin guards.
"Name?"
"Aurora Sunshine Stardust."
"Next!"
"Name?"
"Rebekah Cherry Bloom."
"Next!"
"Name?"
"Aurora Stardust Sunshine."
"Go away!"
"Name?"
"No thank you, I already have one."
"Why do you want to be Goblin Queen?" She shrugged.
"Seems like it's be a fun thing to do." He snorted.
"What are your qualification?"
"Can genuinely smile on command, sarcasm provided free of charge, copious knowledge of history, mythology, literature and random trivia, and my family has neither dramatic curse nor strangely prudish principles against other species. My mother also does not want me to breed in the next five years."
"Will you fear me, love me, and do as I say?"
"No. You'd have to kiss me first, and even then it's doubtful."
"Welcome to the kingdom. Your first duty is to hide as I tell the other applicants that the position has been filled and then comfort me as I weep over the current state of all articulate bipedal creatures."