"In three words I can summon up everything I've learned in life: It goes on." -Robert Frost

Gravity

Chapter Eleven

It was quiet in the temple. Everyone had long since gone to sleep, leaving me awake and alone, which would have been fine before this chaos, but now it just made me feel unsettled. I was still trying to refuse sleep. How hard could it be? Demons don't sleep. Do they? Of course they did. All those nights that I had stayed over at Keiko's after she and Yusuke got married told me that they did. Or else Yusuke was a pretty good actor when it came to snoring that we could hear all the way in the bedroom when we made him sleep on the couch.

I sighed and pressed the base of my palms into my eyes. I was so tired. I wanted nothing more than to sleep. But I was afraid of what would happen if I did. I didn't want to face Seikatsu. Though I knew Hiei would be watching over my dreams, and that did make me feel a little better, I still didn't want to. I was beginning to trust these people. Though I knew they could kill me easily, they were becoming my friends. I didn't want Seikatsu to do something to mess everything up. I didn't want him to try and smooth me over again, trying to get me to trust him. I was on shaky ground with everyone. I wasn't sure if my trust in them was going to hold.

I stood from the bed. I needed a glass of water. Something to preoccupy my mind for a moment. Something to snap me awake for a while longer before I found something else to do the trick. I quietly made my way to the hall, closing my door behind me as quietly as possible. The hallway was dark and silent. I made my way to the kitchen, almost sliding my feet across the floor in my socks trying to not disturb anyone. I didn't know where anyone else rooms were, but I knew that demon ears were a lot more sensitive than human ears. I just didn't know how sensitive.

Flicking the kitchen light on, I let out a breath that I hadn't realized I had been holding. I smiled in satisfaction after I listened for a moment to hear if I had disturbed anyone and didn't hear anyone stirring. I trotted over to the cabinet and reached for a glass. As I turned, my eyes fell on a figure standing in the door way. I jumped, the glass slipping from my hands and a scream started to form.

But it never came. I froze in shock staring up at Hiei's ruby colored eyes as he narrowed his gaze down at me. I tried to open my mouth to speak, but realized his hand was pressed firmly against it. I felt the cabinet behind me pinching into my lower back. I hadn't realized how tall he was before. He stood over a head taller than me. His frame engulfed mine. I shivered as the heat from his body surrounded me. The smell of burning wood and fire assaulted my senses as I held his gaze.

My heart was pounding in my chest. His eyes darkened. I watched as black flames flickered across the dark ruby in his eyes. I forgot how to breathe as his gaze flickered across my face, darkening even further. His eyes snapped back up to mine when I let out a whimper. The cabinet was getting painful from the force he had pushing me into the table. I saw a strange look on his face as he clenched his jaw. I felt a new sensation wash over me that I was pretty much unfamiliar with. It caused something in my lower abdomen to clench uncomfortably, but burned at my insides. I felt my knees quiver as the warmth spread lower. The sound that tried to leave me but was muffled by his hand was another whimper. But it was from something other than pain.

Then suddenly, he was a few paces away. My lung fought for air as I shivered at the lack of his warmth.

"What is on your chest?" he asked, his voice low.

"W-what?" I stammered. I glanced down. A dried green paste was spread over my four scars. One long line, disappearing in between my breasts and into my shirt and three spots around it. "O-oh. Um. Kurama made it for me. T-to help..um. To help my scars." Quit stuttering! I screamed at myself.

He didn't say anything for a long moment. "Go to sleep," he said finally. When I blinked, he was gone.

No longer thirsty, I put the cup that Hiei had saved from being shattered on the ground back in the cabinet and rushed back to my room. Safely back in my room, I hung my head in my hands. What the hell just happened? I had to teach myself to breathe again. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. I told myself sternly. Why had he snuck up on me like that? And why was he looking at me the way he was? Did I make him angry somehow?

I flicked off the light in my room and laid down on my bed. I pulled the blankets over me and tucked them over my head. Suddenly, I was more willing to deal with Seikatsu than I was Hiei.

He glared down at the dragon on his arm. Now in his room that had been provided for him in the temple that he rarely used, the dragon was even more restless than before. He had been awake when he heard the girl leave her room and had gone to see what she was doing so late at night. It was her own fault that she didn't feel him approaching.

He reacted before he could think, catching the cup and clamping his hand over her mouth to keep her from screaming. He didn't want her to wake the others in the temple, especially that damned fox and his twenty questions. But when he had sat the cup down behind her, he locked eyes with hers. He had felt his dragon stir, and before he could push it back and pull away from the girl, he felt her lips quiver against his hand, and her body shiver, pressing further into his own. Then his dragon roared in his head. He almost couldn't fight the urge that had almost taken over him, especially when she stared up at him with the innocent fear that made him-

No, he wouldn't think about it. He refused. This was ridiculous. It was simply his body going through it's damn changes. Changes that he had tried to sate on multiple occasions, but his own body refused him. He let out a growl as the dragon turned under his skin. Then he felt her energy lower and smooth out. She was a sleep.

Dammit, he cursed to himself. He yanked the cloth off covering his Jagan and focused his mind on the last person he wanted to. Her.

I was pleasantly surprised to find that I was actually dreaming. No sunflowers or oceans. Just memories. They flashed across my eyes flooding my senses with sounds and smells.

The first memory was of my mom cooking breakfast one morning before school. I had to have been no older than seven or eight. I watched as my younger self crawled out of bed in kitty pajamas. I skipped down the hall, smelling pancakes, something that we didn't get very often. Mom always tried to make us the traditional Japanese food instead of American food. Especially with me being so young. She didn't want me to hate the food that all the other kids at school ate. I already had a hard enough time in school just being a foreigner and looking different.

David stepped out of his room. He had to have been thirteen or fourteen at the time. He was dressed in a mauve school uniform. He grabbed me as I tired to rush by, drawing an elated squeal from my younger self. He laughed, and carried me into the kitchen as I tried my hardest to pound my small fists into his back, laughing loudly.

Mom turned to us, and I paid no mind to what she said. Only the sound of her voice. Warm and nurturing. She was beautiful. A few inches taller than I was, and blonde curls cut to her shoulders that she tamed into waves that framed her squarish face. Her bright hazel eyes were filled with mirth as she watched us. I could feel her now. Even in my dream, I could feel the love that poured from her like a waterfall. She loved us. She loved us so much. I felt my chest clench painfully as she ushered David away from me and insisted that a growing girl needed breakfast to grow big and strong. I chuckled at that. Yeah. Big and strong.

That memory melted into a new one. My younger self was sitting on the couch, clutching a stuffed cat to me. I had a thing with cats growing up. I loved them. Well, still do. But my younger self wanted nothing to do with anything unless it involved a cat. I was watching the TV screen with wide eyes. I looked up as a large figure appeared in the doorway. I felt my chest give another clench as my dad entered the room with a bowl of popcorn and a grin. He loved "corrupting my mind" with horror movies so my mom once put it. David was a spitting image of him. Tall, large but almost lanky. The deepest of black hair that shone even in darkness. Stone colored blue eyes that were always smiling. I could remember this memory vividly. David was in science club when he was in middle school. They had a competition a few hours away and my mom had volunteered as a chaperone. She was always doing that. Coming on field trips, and always showing up to any school function no matter how unimportant it was. So that left my dad and I alone for the night. That meant horror movies.

My younger self curled into his side, seeking his protection. And I could feel every bit of it. Feeling like nothing could hurt me because Dad was there. He would fight away any monster that sat in the shadows of my room or hid under my bed. It felt like he could protect me from Seikatsu, and any other demon. Because, guess what? Surprise Dad! All the stuff you showed me in horror movies are real. But it was okay. I wasn't scared. Daddy was here. He was here and I was safe. That's all that mattered.

That memory melded into another. I stood in my junior high uniform as my mom fretted over my hair. It was my first day at the school, and she was trying her best to make me look presentable for first impressions with my teachers. My hair wasn't quite as long as it is now, falling only to my mid back, but it was just as curly. I watched as my mom smiled brightly at me as she ran her fingers through my curls, pulling it to one side of my head over my shoulder. She braided it with quick precision, and secured it with a hair tie. She watched my face in the mirror as she placed the curls that sprang free from the braid gently across my head so they didn't frizz. I returned her bright smile. That was the first time I remembered actually feeling pretty with my curls. I had always wanted the pin straight hair the other girls seemed to have. But that was the first time I remember actually seeing what she saw when she would tell me my curls were beautiful and to embrace them.

I watched as more memories flooded me in my dreams. Happy memories. I didn't re watch the night that the police officer had knocked on our door, or having to call David, who had been at a party that night. How I could smell the alcohol on his clothes when he came to the hospital. I didn't have to watch when the doctor came out and told us that there was nothing they could do. Our parents were gone. We were alone. I didn't have to re-live that night that I curled up to David's side and we cried together. My big brother did his best to soothe me and my pain. But he was hurting to. We cried until the sun came up. And we slept all day.

No, the memories I watched were happy ones. Filled with love and joy. Laughter filled my ears as I watched David and I's antics growing up. Though we had a near seven year age difference, he wasn't like the normal brothers that thought his kid sister was just annoying. He spent time with me, and played with me. Before the accident, when he was just a normal teenaged boy growing into a college student. Even when he was a college student, he made sure to see me on weekends, knowing I would get lonely without any friends. Before the stress and sadness were shackles that held his happiness away from him. I could see now the way the last five years had changed him. Even though I knew it was David I was watching, it was like a whole other man. He didn't hold his shoulders squarely anymore. He was too run down and haggard. Worry marred his face now with lines of stress and sleeplessness.

I watched my parents love grow between them as they watched us get older. I felt their love for us with every hug and kiss on the tops of our heads. I watched my mom brush tears from her eyes as I tottered off on my way to my first day of school. I watched admiration dance across my dad's face as I rode my bike for the first time without training wheels. I listened to my mom try and teach me how to cook when I was twelve and watched my dad and David choke it down and smile like it was delicious. Though the burnt mess told me otherwise. The hot summers spent with melting ice cream cones. The cold winters with steaming hot chocolates with marshmallows. The bruises and scrapes that were fixed with a cat band-aid and a kiss.

And the next thing I knew I was staring at the ceiling of the temple, light beginning to flicker into the room with dawn. I reached up and felt the dampness of my face and tasted the saltiness of my tears. And with the first song of the birds waking for another day, I rolled over and pressed my face into the pillow so no one heard the tears that fell.

It was the afternoon by the time I left my room. I heard the others come back and forth from my room. But I couldn't face them yet. Yukina would knock softly, and I pretended to sleep. Kurama did the same. I'm sure both of them knew I wasn't actually sleeping, but neither bothered me and I was thankful for that. I just needed to be alone and build my walls back around my heart that ached with every breath.

Though my body felt better with my sleep, my mind was twice as exhausted as before. So I had no response to Hiei when I ran directly into his chest walking down the hall.

He startled me, almost causing me to lose my balance, but he quickly caught me by the shoulders, keeping me from toppling to the ground. He stared down at me, his ruby eyes hard. But he wasn't glaring. I mumbled a thanks to him for keeping me from bruising my butt on the wooden floor. I started to pull away from him, but he held tight. I met his eyes full on. There was a strange expression in his eyes, but it was different from the night before. I stared at him until he released me, and with a forced smile I continued to walk passed him.

I entered the dinning room and Yukina greeted me with a bright and warm smile. I tried my best to return her smile. I wasn't sure if I succeeded, but if I failed she was kind enough to not say anything. I helped her with dinner.

Genkai, Kurama and Yukina filled the meal with conversation. I stayed quiet for the most part, only answering when directly spoken to. They didn't press me. I knew that they knew I was dealing with something. I wasn't stupid. I didn't miss the concerned looks from Yukina, the way Genkai watched me through the corner of her eyes, or how Kurama was sending soothing emotions my way. I was just too exhausted to care.

I made my way back to my room after Yukina kindly declined my help with dishes, saying that Kurama would help. I didn't argue with her. I needed to talk to David.

What's wrong? He asked when I gave a less than enthusiastic response to whatever witty comment he had for me when he answered his phone.

"I dreamt of Mom and Dad," was all I had to say, drawing a tired sigh from my brother. We sat in silence on the phone as I listened to him breathe on the other end of the line. He knew there was nothing he could say. If I had dreamt of the accident, I would have said the accident. He knew of these dreams well. He had them himself. He knew that for some reason, the happy dreams were the worst. I closed my eyes, feeling the tears burn away at the corners. I didn't want to cry anymore.

I don't know how long we were on the phone sitting in silence before he spoke again.

Just try and get some sleep, okay? I'll hope for you to have a dreamless sleep.

With our good-byes, I hung up, rolled over, and fell asleep.

I was in the field of sunflowers. Before I could even take in the scene around me, a pair of lilac eyes greeted me.

"Hello, Daelyn," he smiled.

Sexual tension and heart wrenching sorrow all in one chapter? I call this a success.

And don't worry! This isn't going to be one of those stories that they fall helplessly in love and all mushy gushy in just like. Two chapters. I'm a cruel author and like to draw things out. I do quite enjoy putting characters though torment. It's kind of a problem.

Anyways, I wasn't going to update this for a few more days, buuut, I do quite enjoy this chapter. After all the chit chat last chapter, I wanted this one to have close to none.

Aly Goode: Yes, I also understand the pain of the beast called curly hair haha. But, why would you want it any other way, you know? And maybe our little Dae-Dae will;) It's going to be a fun ride to find out if she can.

Thank you for all the follows!

And almost fifty follows and reviews?! Almost forty favorites?! That makes me very happy!

Please leave a review or PM me and let me know what you think! I've gone on a writing escapade and I'm already working on chapter thirteen. I'm a very response driven author and enjoy hearing from my readers. Response's make me happy and make me want to update quicker for you all. I also enjoy talking to you all! So please don't be shy!