Authors Note: First of all, a Happy New Year to All of You Readers and Writers out there.
Sorry for the long wait everyone, but I guess you couldn't say we're back in business.
Thank so much for the great comments and support to continue this story.
I'm also currently re-editing some older chapters to make them a tad more enjoyable to read.
And in the mean time I keep up the fantasing on how this story is going to develope.
Hope you enjoyed it thus far, and lets continue our discovery...

Hot & Bothered

Chapter 11
Hot & Bothered
I'm staring at the Mess I made

* What happened last time*
"Do you crave me Rain?" He suddenly asked, his voice deep and husky.
My heart was pounding in my chest, was he asking me what I think he was asking me. 'Say no, Say NO!' my mind screamed in panic, but the words that left my lips were something totally different.

"Yes"I whispered it more or less, but it had been loud enough for Lupin to hear. Seconds later his hands were on either side of my vest, drawing me in.

*Lets continue this shall we*
His lips crashed into mine, hard and urgent, as if he had been waiting to do so for a long time. I felt my body automatically melting into him, lacking the will to resist, and….
Yeah well…. that's what might have happened, if we weren't interrupted by the sound of the dinner bell. Lupin was just about to close the space between us, when suddenly three loud tolls managed to bring us out of our trance. Both our heads turned into the direction from which the sound came from. Which was somewhere beyond the trees to my left, Lupin his right.

It was in that short moment, when we were both distracted, that I realised what the hell I had just been about to do. Or actually, what we had been about to do. There were two parties to blame here.
We almost kissed! Even worse I had asked for him to kiss me, I realised.

'Who am I?'I thought in horror. I, who had let Lupin on, letting him believe that I wanted him. That so wasn't me! But better yet, had I wanted him? The answer to that was; yes, I had wanted him in that moment. I realised to my own horror. But why? I didn't understand. I couldn't get my head around it. "Shit!"The word was but a whisper, falling from my lips, but it sounded like I had screamed it.
Alarmed by the magnetite of it, I took a step back and in doing so managed to graze something with my shoulder. The impact with the tree, caused the back of my head to smack against the rough bark.
A sharp pain took away the little breath I had left, and I crumpled to the floor. Were I stayed, a poor shell of my true self.

Meanwhile Lupin had problems of his own. When he had heard her curse out loud, he knew something had gone terribly wrong. Of course it gone wrong. Nothing could ever go right in his life. Who would want him! He had been foolish to believe she could be at his side. That she had instinctively excepted that she belonged to him. And did so without question. But she had rejected his wolf, her instincts. How? Why?
'Dear Merlin, she must now think I am some kind of paedophile. Praying on young girls.' he thought. He was afraid to look at her, afraid to look her in the eyes, to truly find out what she thought of him.

In front of me I noticed Lupin pacing back and forth with his head in his hands. It would have been a comical sight if I wasn't so damn traumatised. 'What now'?' I wondered. I couldn't look at him, didn't dare to look him in the eye. 'What would he think of me now?' I wondered. Perhaps he thought I was some floozy who like to sleep around. There was also the possibility he thought I was a tease. In that case I would have let him on, on purpose. Or that I liked to toy with his feelings.
I wasn't sure which 'possibility' I hated more.
All made me seem a total bitch, which in all honesty I wasn't.

Merlin could this be anymore uncomfortable?
At long last it was Lupin who managed to get himself together. He cleared his throat a couple of times, before suggesting we might go grab something to eat. I found myself nodding but realising pretty soon he wasn't looking at me, he was facing the other way.

'He hates me now' I realised. 'Can't even stand to look at me' I couldn't blame him though. He was so close to me, and yet seemed so far away.
Being the gentleman he was though he did hold out his hand to me.
'he's still pretending everything is ok. That he doesn't hate me, but that's impossible.' I thought. I didn't take his hand though, even though I struggled to get to my feet. 'I can't have him think I'm just toying with his feelings' I reasoned.

'please take my hand' Lupin thought pleading. 'come on, take it!' he wanted to scream it to her. When she didn't. When he noticed she stood up without accepting his help, he felt something inside his chest shatter. 'She's afraid of me' a bitter feeling seeped into his chest, and lodged itself deep inside. He felt doomed.

On the way back we both said nothing, kept a good four feet between us at all time. Neither of us knew that we were both thinking the same thing. Either one afraid that the other one was going to tell on him/her.
We made sure we did not enter the lodge at the same time, or Lupin did. My brain was still out of commission. I went in alone, because Lupin mentioned he had something else to do first.

"Rain over here!"Kirsten waved franticly. She couldn't be missed in doing so, so I waved back. Signalling I had seen them. It took me a moment to survey the situation. Apparently we had to grab our own plates and stand in line to receive some food. Well that's different from just making it appear in front of you, like it did at school. I went to stand in line. A first for me.
I ate dinner that evening, with Kirsten, Fiach and Jack, who to my surprise had decided to sit with us. The three of them were bantering shamelessly through out dinner, it was fun to watch, and for a moment I forgot my troubles. I found Dumbledore glancing our way, as did many a teacher and student, but they decided to let it slide. To let us have our fun. In fact some even joined in for a short period of time.
At the same time, I kept my eyes open for him, just so I could stay out of his way. But he never showed up. From that observation, I deducted that he couldn't stand be near me, could not even stand to be in the same room as me. Should I be happy about that? I wondered.

We were practically the last ones to leave the mess hall. Two other teams had already started their chores, wiping tables clean, and dragging a broom across the room. From inside the kitchen, sounds of people doing the dishes could be heard. Oh and us laughing.
When we finally set foot outside a lot had changed.
The evening had set in during dinner, and with that came a cooler air. As soon as I stepped outside I felt it. I welcomed it silently, and asked if the other three wanted to go on a little stroll around the camp/forest with me. I had enjoyed their company and apparently so had they for they all accepted gladly.

We talked a bit more about our first assignment, how things went.
"You know tonight we've got a campfire. Apparently muggles sing songs and roast marshmallows around them. Why don't we go too?"Jack opted.

"Yeah! It's so much fun! We can play games around it, or just sit and talk."Kirsten agreed. Being a Muggle she knew all about it. "OWH, and telling scary stories!" All in all we decided to go, even I who wasn't quite sure if it was the right choice in that time. On the other hand, I figured, I could always leave and go to bed early if things turned out to be a disaster.