Illusions

After getting out of my ruined dress, I washed up and threw on a pair of faded navy-blue pajama shorts and a black camisole tank top. I went into the cabinet behind the mirror over the sink to find a small first-aid kit. With the flesh wound on my arm clean and free of dirt and blood, I took a thin bit of bandages and wrapped it around a few times to secure it. I put the kit back, and then went out into the living room in the center of the suite. Again, I found Kurtis sitting on the couch, and he didn't seem to notice my presence.

"So, what were you and Angela talking about?" I asked, sitting down on the opposite side of the sofa.

He shrugged, his eyes roaming and not really looking anywhere in particular. "We just…talked."

"Alright then…" I said after waiting for something else that never came. I kept thinking to myself that nothing was wrong; he was probably just tired from everything that had happened, and it was getting late. I changed the brief topic when neither of us spoke. "Did you happen to notice something strange about Callegar?"

He looked sideways at me. "No?" It sounded more like a question than an answer.

"What do you mean 'no'? Did you even see his eyes?"

"Uh…I guess. What about them?"

I stared at him, my mouth gaping. "Are you saying you didn't see?"

"See what?"

"His eyes! They changed."

Kurtis's brows furrowed, showing that he probably thought I must be crazy. "No, they didn't." He said slowly.

"Yes, they did." I sputtered. "And you didn't notice he looked different before?"

"…Lara, are you okay? Did that explosion get you in the head or something?"

"Kurtis, I'm not crazy! I know what I saw!" I said, getting louder. "His eyes were green before, and they changed. Don't tell me you couldn't see something so clear like that right in front of you."

"I mean it when I say this, Lara. They—he didn't change. I was right behind you the whole time, and his eyes were definitely the same colour the entire way through. And I'm more than sure that they were never green."

I shook my head. "That's not possible." I breathed. "He shot Angela. And when he did, he didn't look anything like Callegar. But it was him, and I know that I wasn't delusional when I saw the visible differences in both him and the shooter."

Kurtis's deep, intense eyes filled with confusion, and something of concern. "He looked exactly the same to me. Same height, same hair, same everything. I didn't recognize him as Callegar from behind, but when we met with him, I already knew that he'd been the one who tried to kill Angie." He put a hand to my forehead, perhaps checking for a temperature, and I could tell he was beginning to think there was something wrong with me. "Are you sure you're okay?"

He pulled his hand away from me, and I rubbed my eyes. "I don't know. Maybe I was just imagining it all…"

"Just go to bed. You need to chill for a while. You're overwhelmed, you're weak, and not to mention you've been completely sleep-deprived for the last few nights." Kurtis reminded me. "I don't think I have ever seen someone fall asleep in a car or airplane so many freaking times in only three days." His last comment was meant to be humorous, I guessed, but he was still serious about the fact behind it.

"Well," I started. "I suppose you've got a point." I got up from the couch, about to leave for my room. "What about you? I haven't seen you at rest since we met up again in the first place, either."

Another shrug. "I'll go to sleep in a bit. I just need to…think through some things."

"Like?"

There was a pause of an almost eerie silence as my short question hung in the air. Then I sighed, sitting back down. "Like…what happened today?"

Kurtis didn't answer. Hmm, so that's why you're being so quiet then, I thought quizzically to myself.

Knowing no good would come out of a nonexistent conversation, I began again. "I'm sorry, Kurtis; I know I shouldn't have done that. And if you feel bad about it, then don't. It was my idea in the first place. And if it weren't for that, we could have made it to your sister in time, and she wouldn't be in the hospital right now." I apologized. "I'm sorry for that, too."

"Well, don't be." Kurtis said instantly. "I'm not upset over some…some plan you devised to get into a locked room. And it's not your fault; Angela would've gotten hurt anyway. There was nothing we could do. Besides…" I could swear I saw that slight half-smile come onto his face again. "…it was a pretty good plan." There was a small glint of mischief in his eyes as they met mine. That did it.

"Oh. Well, I'll just be…going to bed now, then." I stammered in delayed reaction, getting up again. I was feeling an awkward mood building between us. "We'll talk in the morning. Good night, Kurtis."

I immediately walked back towards my division of the suite, and closed my door behind me. I collapsed on the bed, doing nothing but simply breathing for a few minutes in the dark. I pulled the covers over me, and then soon found it was too hot for all of them. I took off the bedspread, which caused most of the heat, leaving just the thin, white sheets left over on the bed.

I went to the tall door of the small balcony and opened it just a bit to let in the air. Before going back, I stayed there for a moment, admiring the night sky. It was deep and unfathomable, and perfectly clear- everything around me was illuminated by the mesmerizing light of the perfect moon. The black canvas was dotted with the sparkling, white flecks of stars across it. I'd never really taken time to marvel such beauty- and when I did, it was so many times more gorgeous than I would have ever thought it could be. I closed my eyes, the light almost feeling like warmth touching my face.

Taking in the last of it, I stepped out from the balcony and into the room once more, still keeping the door open a crack. I returned to the bed, and with the soft, bluish light beaming down onto me through the darkness, I finally, for once in what felt to be a very long time, fell into a deep sleep.

-x-

When I awoke, it was still dark. I looked at the electric clock on the dresser. It was about four in the morning. I moved the sheets off of me, and stepped onto the carpeted floor. The doors of the balcony were still open- it was a bit more chilled in the room now, but still humid. The sky was just barely lighter- instead of jet-black, it was a dark violet-blue. Finding that I couldn't make myself go back to sleep, I opened the door to my room and quietly stepped out.

I strolled down the short hall into the living room again- and stopped short when I saw that Kurtis had fallen asleep on the couch where I'd left him. I smiled; he looked so at peace when not awake. Taking my chances, I carefully crept around to the other side of the room, not wanting to disturb him.

I went over to my bags that were still lying on the table in the corner, and took out my MP3 player. Then I tiptoed back towards the center of the room, then sat down on the small, cushioned bench in the alcove beneath the window that partially encircled it, hoisting my legs up onto it. Leaning against the bit of wall on either side of the small niche, I put in the earbuds, and set the music on a low volume. After about five minutes of the tranquil peacefulness, I slowly started becoming tired again, and I drifted off into a light slumber, yet still somewhat awake.

I wasn't aware of anything, except for the faint sound of Evanescence's "Lacrymosa" humming in my ears. And I wasn't aware of time, either; my eyes slowly fluttered open, and I saw the morning light beginning to stream through the glass beside me. I yawned, rubbing the inner corners of my eyes. But I shut them once more, still too sleepy to get up. I was surprisingly comfortable on the soft seat. I began dozing off once more, but then was brought back by a sound.

I turned my head, and saw Kurtis squinting, shielding his eyes from the abrupt light in the window. As soon as he could clearly see, he grinned at me.

"Morning." He greeted me upon his wake, sitting up straight on the couch and stretching. "Hmm, so I guess you woke up before me then?"

I smirked. "Since when were we competing to see who'd get up first?"

He shrugged goofily. "I dunno. About two seconds ago."

That earned a full smile from me. I guess he's a morning person, then, I thought. What a rare trait. I got up from the bench, pulling out my earbuds as I joined him on the sofa.

"I thought you went to your room last night." He said questioningly as I sat down.

"I did, for a few hours. But I woke up."

"…And you came in here?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

I shook my head in amusement after I processed his words for a minute. "Oh, do shut up. It's not like I was spying on you or anything."

"Or were you?"

I laughed, and so did Kurtis. Everything felt so…normal. Like there were no worries, like nothing was going on outside at all. It was just like that morning at the café in Japan.

Getting over our last laughs, Kurtis looked at me considerately, as if he were about to comment on something. His tone of voice changed somehow as he spoke. "Anyone ever tell you that you have a great laugh?"

I gazed at him, surprised, yet still flattered at the compliment deep inside. "Er…excuse me?"

Kurtis sighed with something of a chuckle. Then his spellbinding blue eyes met mine again, and this time he didn't look away. There was a long pause of thought before he started again. "You want to know what me and Angela were talking about?"

"What?"

"You."

I held back the urge to blush, but I wasn't sure if I succeeded or not. "And what were you…saying about me, exactly?"

"Well, she already knew about what happened in the security room…"

My jaw dropped. "Oh, God. You're kidding, right?"

"No, unfortunately…" He trailed off, then began again slowly. "But I thought about it after and…God, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think I was actually pretty bummed when that guard came up."

There was no doubt that my cheeks had turned tomato red by then. Had he just admitted that he…liked what had happened between us?

Oh my goodness, Lara, I began thinking again. Just stop it. Nothing 'happened' between us, for the love of God. Get yourself together…

Kurtis was still looking at me, as if he were trying to read something off of me. At that moment, I could have given anything to know his thoughts. And suddenly, I felt awfully insecure, as I wondered if he could read mine like he was able to with Angela. I tried not to think if that had been possible this whole time- actually, I tried not to think at all. But I couldn't be sure if it was working. I figured, that focusing on trying not to think, was turning to make me do the exact opposite, forcing many more thoughts into my head. Maybe that's what everyone keeps telling me, another idea flowed into my mind unwillingly. Have I actually, for once in my life, been worrying too much?

Despite the time that was rapidly going away in seconds, or perhaps minutes, by all my random thinking, I didn't fail to notice that Kurtis's eyes hadn't ceased their curious lock on mine. I sensed him lean in closer to me, gradually only inches from my face- and there, I thought another chance of our lips meeting again was present –but that chance became slim, as I nearly jumped at the sound of my PDA ringing loudly against the defiant silence. Kurtis moved away, somehow seeming a bit disappointed, and I sighed, reaching over to the glass coffee table and grabbing the phone with my timid fingers.

"Zip." I said in a low tone, instantly knowing it was him without checking the ID.

"Morning. So, did you survive the night?"

"Actually, I did. I had a surprisingly wonderful sleep, no mental interruptions whatsoever."

I could almost hear Zip smiling on the other end. "That's good to hear. I thought you might go insane with all those lost hours of sleep."

I think I already have…I pondered, not sure what it meant, but that it was valid in one way or another. "Don't tell me you're going to start calling me every hour when I'm not in the house." I questioned.

"What, was I interrupting something?"

I glimpsed over my shoulder at Kurtis, who didn't take mind of me talking on the phone. He'd gotten up and started to his room.

"No." I half-lied in return shortly afterward with a quiet voice, mindlessly fixing the black straps on one of my shoulders that had probably slipped while I was sleeping.

"Well then why are you complaining?" Zip asked again.

"I'm not complaining. I'm just stating that there's no logical reason for you to keep calling me so often, that's all."

"Fine. I'll take the calls down a notch. Besides, I'm probably wastin' your minutes anyway." Zip gave in.

"Exactly."

I heard a breath of hesitation come from him after a pause. "I'm just kinda worried about you, y'know? I've probably already told you this like a million times before, but you've been acting strange lately. I know you've got tons on your mind, but Lara, I'm asking you again, to please take it easy. I'd hate myself if I lost another friend."

I frowned, wondering why everyone kept telling me the same thing. Was I really acting differently than I always have?

"Zip, I appreciate you being such a caring friend to me, but believe me, I'll be perfectly fine. I've got Kurtis and Angela with me, and we'll be getting home soon…"

"That's not really what I meant, Lara…" He cut me off quietly.

I rolled my eyes, realizing the horrible thing he might have been suspecting. "Zip, you don't think I'm going to turn suicidal or anything like that, do you? It's been months since all of that happened, and I have a life, and people I still care about, why would I take that away from myself, especially when I could have done so all that time back? When I was actually grieving?"

"No, no, 'course not, but…well, I'm just sayin', you may have a life, but it's a tough one." Zip explained with reason. "And I know you say you're over it all, but how can you be? You got hit with it all at once. Your parents, the manor, Alister, Winston…" Another break. "And now you're dealing with your past comin' back for you and everything. It's like the definition of self-apocalypse! How do you deal with all that?"

"Alright, I understand what you meant by the first part, but where on Earth do you get my 'past coming back to get me' from?"

"You're jokin', right? All these random murders that the police came asking you about, bringing up what happened with your mentor? And, Kurtis, he's involved with that too. You had some kinda…thing or affair with him, and it was around the time that all went down, too, right?"

If he had been beside me, I could have smacked him right there and then. "No, I never had a 'thing' with him, Zip. He was just helping me. I didn't even know him well enough all those years ago, so how can you suspect I have an affair with someone I've only been around for hardly two days?" I snapped in defense. "I haven't the slightest clue where everyone keeps getting these absurd ideas from!"

Zip huffed in frustration, and I was surprised that he was actually getting angry with me. He'd always been the one who kept calm. "Okay, whatever you say, Lara. Just go do whatever the hell you need to do, and get back quickly, kay? Talk to you later."

He immediately hung up. I dropped the phone from my ear, staring at it in my hand as the line went dead.

"What was that all about?" I looked up to see that Kurtis had gotten quickly changed and emerged from his bedroom within the past minute or so.

I got up indignantly, going over to my bags and stuffing the PDA in one of the pockets. "It was nothing. Zip just wants us to get back as soon as possible." I answered almost inaudibly through a mumble.

I picked up the bags, whizzing straight past Kurtis, and headed for my room, where I exchanged my shorts for a pair of dark jeans, and I tucked them into my black boots. I brushed out my hair into a long ponytail that hung down past my shoulder blades, and decided it was too hot for a jacket, so I kept the lightweight camisole on by itself. I left my room as soon as I had everything together.

"Kurtis, I advise you to go pack Angela's things. And perhaps get some clean clothing ready for her so we can leave immediately from the hospital."

"Um. Okay then." Kurtis replied, seeming confused by my hastiness, but he did as I told. We departed from the hotel, and headed off to get Angela.

-x-

"You told us she was dead."

Amanda was, undoubtedly, furious out of her mind. The Doppelganger had betrayed her orders, and now she had hell to pay.

The superhuman clone of Lara stood before her and Callegar. "I never stated she was. I only confirmed that I did what you told me to. And that was only to get the Lux Veritatis weapon and return it to you."

"And to kill Lara." Amanda repeated herself.

"I believe Callegar said only to kill her if she appeared." The Doppelganger corrected her once more. "And not necessarily for I myself to kill her, but to lead her into a trap. Those were my only orders, and I chose to follow them. I did only what I was told and nothing otherwise."

Amanda crossed her arms triumphantly over her chest, clenching her jaw. "You're wrong."

"No, Amanda, she isn't." Callegar interrupted. Amanda didn't remove her icy gaze from the Doppelganger. "She's right. That was all I told her to do, and that is exactly what she did. Of course, she didn't have to."

The Doppelganger's head tilted meekly, and she began to faintly wonder why she did choose to follow their orders anyway. She didn't have to; she had a choice. She didn't belong to anyone anymore. 'But I was built to kill,' she thought, reminding herself of what she was. Then again, she remembered that she'd saved lives before, too- and recently. She'd saved her human counterpart two, perhaps even three or four times, some without Lara even noticing it.

Even under Natla's control, she had stopped Lara from being killed by Amanda. And then she had prevented her planned death, beneath the crypt of the Manor only a day or two ago. Last night she'd even brought the life of a dying human to safety in order to help and keep trust with her weaker double. She also wondered, why and how was she was working both sides? Or if she was even working for either side at all. She passed off her unanswered thoughts quickly, and let her mind remain void.

Callegar talked briefly to the Doppelganger for another moment or so, Amanda in too much of a huff to give a damn. The Doppelganger departed once they were finished.

"How do you know she's telling the truth?" Amanda asked in a demanding tone. "How do you know she isn't helping them?"

"She is telling the truth." Callegar replied with an ease. "But I do know she is helping them. That's why I'm letting her do her job."

Amanda shook her head in disgust. "You have no idea what you're doing. If you know she's helping them, then why haven't you gotten rid of her yet? She'll just be an easy spy for them, won't she?"

"No, not if they don't know she's helping us as well." Callegar explained. "Amanda, don't try to take matters into your own hands. The only one who doesn't know what they're doing around here is you."

Amanda narrowed her eyes bitterly at the menacing man. "Why do we need to keep Lara alive? I thought you told me I could have revenge. When the hell am I gonna get anything out of this?" She realized she had begun to yell, though she still felt small and useless beside Callegar's powerful presence. "We had a deal, Callegar. I help you, you help me. Now how many times do I have to ask for what I need?"

Callegar looked at the pixie-haired woman with his cold, frightening eyes. Amanda felt an uncomfortable chill down her spine at his stare. "You don't need revenge, Amanda. You want it." He started. "And I've already told you why we need your friend to stay alive, at least for a while to come."

"First off, she's not my friend." Amanda droned. "Secondly, you've barely begun to explain your whole plan to me, or at least not the part where Lara comes in. If you need her to stay alive so badly, then why did you risk the chance of her Doppelganger killing her in the first place?"

"Because I knew she wouldn't let her die. Lara's done too much to help her- being freed from her eternal slavery was the greatest thing that could happen to her. Unfortunately, she isn't putting it to much good use…" Callegar began again.

"And what about the others? Those telepaths or whatever they are. What's so important about them?"

"Kurtis, too, needs to be kept alive. He and Lara both. At least until the time is right." Callegar said in a way that seemed almost as though he were brainstorming. Amanda didn't say anything, she couldn't even begin to comprehend what she was being told, so he continued. "Angela…Angela is a different case, however, which is too complicated for me to explain for you at the moment. Though she as well, is better off alive. For now its best we let things play out, and eventually we'll be able to make use or decoy out of her."

Amanda, for some reason, felt her hands getting slightly cold beneath the long sleeves of her black jacket. She wanted to know what roles all these people played in this twisted, mastermind idea of Callegar's, of which she only knew bits and pieces of. But she couldn't stop the questions from rolling out of her mouth.

"But why? What is so damn important about them? Is it so hard to just go ahead and get rid of them?" She balled her hands into fists, feeling a strange mix of emotions that somehow didn't seem to fit the mood she had in her mind. "If I don't get things done soon, I'll just go right ahead and do it my way."

Callegar darted a furious glare at Amanda, and in seconds clutched her tightly by the arm. He spoke so deep and solemnly, and so direct to Amanda, that she was afraid he might kill her on the spot.

"Mark my words, Miss Evert, if you ever attempt to do any such thing, all will be lost, and you will wish you were never born." His eyes were close to Amanda's, cutting straight into her soul. She felt cold all of a sudden, and his grip on her arm was so strong, she felt as though if he moved even the slightest bit, her entire bone would break in two.

His threatening voice near her ear sent nightmares running through her mind. "Do not in any way try to hurt them; don't even speak of it to the Doppelganger. If she, or anyone else, gets a false hint that you or I want them dead, and if a murder is attempted on any of the three of them, you will never see daylight again. Do you understand, Amanda?"

Amanda's breath came in quiet, short gasps, and she realized her entire body was trembling from a chill. She nodded, pleading for Callegar to let go. He released her, and she stood, feeling weak in all her joints, even though he had only been holding her upper arm. He stared at her for another moment with sharp eyes, and left her in the room alone.

Amanda already knew that he was unlike other people, that he was special in some way, like Angela and Kurtis were. She knew, firsthand, that he played tricks on minds, and that only moments ago, she could have died if he didn't let go of her soon enough. She already felt more than half of her energy drained from her body, as he had started taking the warmth and life right out of her.

'Oh God…' Amanda thought, sinking down to the floor, her knees weak and her hands frail. 'What have I done?'