A/N

Holy hell in a hand basket how long has it been since I updated? The world outside my computer has gone to hell and I have not been able to type at all! Also typing two stories at once does things to you . Well now I have considered to either update one story a week or stop typing one story all together. What do you think? Comment!

-Slinky762

I suppressed a yawn as the lady with huge boobs on the baseball field finished the last line of the national anthem. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for the patriotic crap that we Americans have, but baseball really isn't my thing if you know what I mean. Beside me Edward, Jacob, and Jasper were sitting expectantly on the edges of their seats waiting for the game to start. I was sitting expectantly on the edge of my seat waiting for it to end. The announcer guy came on the intercom.

"Um there seems to be some uh not so technical problems here. Uh some fat chick wearing all black just kidnapped both baseball teams." My jaw dropped and eyes widened. I think I know where this is gonna go.

"Bella, Bella! Watching a baseball game is cool but saving baseball players is like a triple rainbow of awesomeness!" Jasper gasped, pleading like a 4 year old. I was sunk when 6 pleading eyes met mine. I resisted the urge to give in with all my will power.

"Ok fine." Obviously I didn't have much will power, huh? So off to the announcer room we go, to get info on the kidnapping.

We didn't get much out of the announcer dude. For lack of a better word he was quite the ass hole. Can't tell much over an intercom, can you? Also his sexy voice threw you off from the "Dirty Hill-Billy" look.

"What do you brats want?" He barked as soon as we entered the room.

"Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the lawn chair this morning." Jasper commented as the rest of us glared holes in his head.

"Do I need to make my question more hostile?" The announcer dude growled as he covered the microphone sitting in front of him.

"Hi um Mr.…?" Edward began trying to kiss ass.

"Black." Mr. Black grunted. " Billy Black." He finished eyeing Jacob.

"Uncle Billy?" Jacob said wide eyed and whimpering.

"Jacob?" Billy said back with just as much enthusiasm. And I swear seeing two men run in slow motion towards each other in a field of shiny flowers is by far the strangest thing I have ever seen. And trust me, I have seen some pretty strange things in my time. You know being half bird, half kid. After the emotional reunion my eyes were still burning.

"So um you two know each other?" Jasper said. No duh Sherlock, and the moon orbits the Earth too.

"He's my nephew." Billy said tearing up slightly. " His mom and dad thought they lost him back in California. They were swimming along the beach when the tide came and swept him away." Billy continued squeezing the crap out of Jacob again. Hmmm so Jacob has parents that actually want him, that crazy doctor must have picked him up off the beach figuring he was homeless.

"So not to be a kill joy or anything but, what about the kidnappings?"

~Hollister, California~

Dr. Grant (Hey haven't seen him around lately huh?) stepped out of the hall into a room with 7 other scientists in white lab coats. He sat in a huge chair and cast an icy stare at everyone in the room.

"You all know why you are here right?" Dr Grant's voice boomed around the room.

The scientists nodded and one sad SOB raised his hand in wonder. Dr Grant's eyes locked on his and stared him down.

"Yes Dr Carlisle?" Everyone in the room turned towards him.

"I was wondering what we are doing actually, I just don't get it." He said keeping a low voice.

"Well you incompetent fool, we are killing everyone in the world with defects slowly by mutation, if I have to spell it out for you." Dr Grant sneered at the thought of what he would do with this poor soul for screwing up.

"What?" Carlisle stuttered just realizing what he got into. They advertised this job as many different things. Surviving 2012, creating better life for people, and making science breakthroughs. Not murder and mutation.

"We are creating and army of mutated beings right now and going to use them to go out in the world and seek the sick and elderly and either killing them on the spot or injecting a needle of animal genes that will take over the body and try to turn it into that animal, while I will sit back and watch, hopefully it will be entertaining." He smiled so cold bloodedly all his teeth were showing once more.

" Bertha my greatest achievement has been following around our greatest threat, and it seems they have been seeking me out. Well let them come, come to meet their doom. No one knows how much information they hold on my institute and what they could do with it, like go to the police for example. I will have none of this. Which is why Bertha is keeping them in line for me." He continued smiling until spots began forming on his face and his hair began growing thick. "Run little piggy run." Dr Grant managed out in a growl.

Carlisle took off towards the exit adrenaline pumping through his veins. But he was too late.

~Somewhere in New York~

We were all staring up at a pink-ish looking building with a sense of misplacement.

"It just screams Bertha." Jasper said fighting the urge to shiver.

"I know what you mean, before I only met her once and this defiantly tells that story." Edward said.

"That must have been crazy." Jacob whispered forgetting the fact that he hated Edward's guts for maybe a millisecond.

"You have no idea." Edward answered back.

"Into the valley of death stumbled the thoughtless and stupid." I mumbled as I stepped forward and grabbed a cold door handle. Inside it was, well like an abandoned building. The pink exterior kind of threw you off, kind of like Billy Black. How in God's name is Jacob related to THAT? I don't know but the world works in mysterious ways. Jasper walked over to the elevator and pressed the button. Nothing happened, so like any child would he continued pounding the button until it popped of in a mess of springs.

"Oops." He mumbled and backed away looking at the ceiling. I motioned for us to go to the stairs. Edward, like the gentleman he is, held open the door for us as we all walked in. Jacob stood at by the railing and looked up.

"How many floors did this building look?" He said cringing a bit.

"30 maybe 40." Edward said sighing heavily." Just a guess."

"Here we go." I grunted and started up the stairs of death.

~Floor 10~

"Find anything?" I shouted drearily down a corridor.

"Nope just an old record player and a chicken in the men's restroom." Jasper yelled back as I heard clucking in the background. Great.

~Floor 23~

Did you know if you throw a chicken out the window of the 20th floor window, that it won't fly? It will just flap around for a few seconds, then drop like a rock onto a pedestrians head. Don't look at me all those animal cruelty eyes and what not. If you had to go 10 floors listening to all that clucking you would have thrown both the chicken and the guys out the window. At least I had the compassion not to throw them out the window with the chicken. Then again they would have laughed at me and flown off, well except for Jacob. He would have been a sidewalk pancake.

~Floor 27~

Did you know the average office building has 30 cubicles in one room?

~Floor 30~

I can't feel my legs and my heels are killing me!

~Floor 40~

Hahahahah what do you know only 40 floors. I stood at the top of the stairs and looked down at them in triumph.

"You know I should have mentioned this on Floor 15 but you know we could have just flown from the 1st floor up to the 40th floor. It would have been much easier." Edward gasped and collapsed on the floor. I smacked my hand to my forehead. Of course! Why didn't I think of that?