A/N: Hey guys, I'm sorry for updating a couple of days later than usual; I had a busy week last week. Anyway, thank you to everyone who reviewed and those who were not impressed by my killing of Severus, I do hope that you continue to read my fic. One reviewer mentioned that not many people have written fanfics where Severus survives Nagini's attack… I am sorry, I was not aware that so many of you were hoping that this fic will be one of those; I was certain that it would have been done… So I completely understand your anger at me But as I mentioned in the A/N of my last chapter, in another fanfic of mine 'It is our choices' Severus does survive Nagini's attack. I know that this offer cannot make up for killing Severus in this one, but please try to think of this fanfic as a 'what should have happened in canon after Severus died'. But of course like many of you and like 'It is our choices' shows, I wanted Severus to survive the canon too (he is my favourite character after all). I did not write this fanfic as another Severus survives scenario; I've already done that and I hope you can respect my choice But anyway, here is chapter 11 which includes Severus' funeral and portrait. Perhaps it would interest you to know that there are three chapters left after this one??? So it's not all over yet
To do what is right
Chapter 11
The world was buzzing around Harry as he walked through the school towards the place he dreaded most- the Shrieking Shack. With Hermione on his left and Ron on his right, Harry could hear a lot of talk around him, however little of it made sense; Harry only had one thing on his mind: Professor Snape…
"Congratulations Potter!"
"You-Know-Who is dead!"
"Did you hear? Harry Potter is giving Snape a funeral!?"
"But he hated Snape… didn't he?"
Harry did his best to block out the voices that followed him everywhere and Ron and Hermione did their best to support their friend, however silently as the three of them made their way to the Shrieking Shack. Harry had suggested to Ron that he should stay with his family while they decided when to have Fred's funeral. However, Ron insisted that he could not bear anymore sadness and even though where they were going could be no more uplifting, Ron wanted to get away for a while.
Using magic to levitate a stick to prod the knot on the tree, Hermione then led her friends into the Whomping Willow. Harry usually would have done all of this, but his fear of what they would find in the shack was tormenting him. Although Voldemort's downfall was something definitely worth celebrating, Harry felt he could not truly be happy until he had laid Severus' body to rest. The image of seeing Severus when he used the Resurrection Stone, which now lay abandoned in the forest, was fresh in his mind and he wanted to make sure he did Severus' memory justice by giving him a proper burial.
Now that they were only feet from the main bedroom of the Shrieking Shack, Hermione halted to let Harry enter first. It was dark by this time, so Harry lit his wand, having repaired it with the Elder wand in the headmaster's office and shone the light in the direction where he knew Severus' body should be. Sure enough, Harry immediately found Severus with the light and upon seeing the body, a sense of horror and shock filled him as he moved his wand away and turned from the scene; he couldn't do this.
"Harry?" Hermione said gently, lighting her own wand and approaching her friend. "Are you okay?"
"I- I can't look at him," Harry admitted, saddened that he couldn't at least bring himself to do THAT for Professor Snape.
"You- you won't have to mate," Ron said, trying to sound reassuring. "I'm sure Hermione could levitate him out of here, couldn't you?" Ron asked, turning to his girlfriend who nodded.
At this, Hermione moved closer to Severus' body, her own wand light passing over the corpse from head to toe to make sure nothing abnormal had happened to the body since they were last there- heaven forbid someone like Greyback had found Severus… the thought was too horrifying to comprehend. Concluding that all was as she expected, Hermione wondered whether she should conceal Professor Snape's injuries but then decided against it- they were not too bloody and she felt that people should know what Severus suffered in his last moments- how much he had sacrificed for all of them…
"Harry, I am ready when you are," Hermione said, standing up again and walking back to her friends.
"Does he look really bad?" Harry asked, not quite able to keep the fear and childish tone out of his voice.
"He is very pale, but I have left everything the way it is, I think it would be a crime to try and cover up his injuries."
Harry nodded; he completely agreed.
"Please tell me the incantation Hermione, I want to do this," Harry said in a tone that implied more determination than he actually felt.
"Locomotor corpus," Hermione replied and then stepped aside so Harry could get closer to Severus.
Taking a deep breath, Harry pointed his wand at the body and shakily said: "Locomotor corpus!"
At this, Harry watched, slightly horrified, but also transfixed by what he saw as Severus' body rose off the ground to the same level as Harry's wand. Just by thinking about where he wanted the body to go was enough to direct the floating mass out of the shack, Severus' body leaving first in a small procession as they escaped that terrible place.
Harry was relieved to get back into the fresh air and while he did have Severus' body dangling eerily before him he tried not to think about it as he carefully directed the body to the opposite side of the grounds where a white tomb was waiting for Severus. Harry had thought long and hard about where to bury Professor Snape. When he went to the Headmaster's office to tell Dumbledore about the fate of the Deathly Hallows and to repair his wand, he also asked the man if Severus had any living relatives, to which the answer was 'no'. So, Harry realised it was his responsibility as well as an honour to be the one to decide what to do with Severus' body, where to bury him and who should be invited to the funeral. It was eventually decided, after he had consulted Hermione and Ron as well, that Severus should be buried at Hogwarts in a white tomb, much like Dumbledore but less grand; just a simple, though equally emotional farewell to a man who now had the freedom he deserved.
As Harry, Ron and Hermione were appoaching the tomb, people were leaving the castle eager to see whether Voldemort had really gone (for the students who were evacuated had returned and wanted to see if the rumours were true) whereas others wanted to see it for their own eyes that Harry Potter was actually going to hold a funeral for Professor Snape the next day. Most didn't believe it and Harry understood why, but to him, it seemed like no other option would do; Harry knew he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he didn't give Severus a burial because he wanted to have the opportunity to tell people who Professor Snape truly was.
When Harry, his friends and Severus' body reached the awaiting tomb, Harry wasn't sure how to direct the body into it; he didn't want to knock Severus' head and even though he knew it was a body in which Severus no longer resided, symbolically he didn't want the man to suffer anything more from his hands. After much hesitation, Hermione suggested quietly that she take over and although Harry regretted letting Severus out of his hands, he knew that there were none more capable than Hermione's.
Hermione, with great patience and skill managed to levitate Severus' body gracefully into his tomb and even used her wand to make it so that he was facing upward, his black hair was away from his face and his hands were placed carefully in front of his chest. He looked so peaceful that Harry moved a little closer so that he could see the man's face close up for the first time since his death. Hermione was right, his skin was extremely pale, but his face was calm and peaceful. Ron and Hermione waited for Harry until he was ready to close and seal the tomb. They had considered keeping it open like it was done for Dumbledore's funeral, but Harry thought that perhaps Severus would not have liked heaps of people looking at him- he deserved to rest in peace, freedom from the judgment of others.
Harry didn't quite know why he couldn't walk away from Severus' body; he knew the man was okay for he had seen him a few hours ago smiling and looking happier than he had ever seen him and yet, the fact that the man was no longer a part of his living life was painful for Harry. The following day Harry would say a eulogy for Professor Snape and although he hadn't written one, he hoped that the right words would come to him. As he looked at Severus' face, he tried to gain some inspiration for his speech, but it didn't work. He couldn't believe that after everything that had happened, Professor Snape still died, for something so ridiculous- because Voldemort was so certain- so arrogant in his belief- so mistaken as to think that Professor Snape was the master of the Elder wand. It greatly upset Harry to think that the man died for nothing, that if it wasn't for Voldemort, the man would still be alive, but then again, that is what Voldemort did: destroyed the lives of the people we love.
As Harry continued to stand over the tomb, he could feel multiple eyes watching him. Without really knowing, he could sense that other students and perhaps teachers too had left the castle and were watching Harry from a distance. A gust of wind blew and Harry watched as three leaves fell onto Severus' body. Harry bravely reached in and pulled each leaf off one by one and then bent forward so that his mouth was uncomfortably close to Severus' cold flesh and whispered: "I will always remember you, Professor Snape."
Pulling slowly away, Harry stood upright once more, raised his wand and lowered the lid of the coffin, sealing Severus permanently in his peaceful tomb and in Harry's heart forever.
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Harry hardly slept that night; all he could think about was Severus' funeral the following day and now that that day had arrived, Harry was looking forward for it to be over. Last night while Harry, Ron and Hermione were with Severus, the Weasleys had transported Fred, Tonks and Remus' bodies back to the Burrow where, after Severus' funeral, they would return and deliver Tonks to Andromeda and discuss with her about funeral arrangements for the couple. As for Fred, his funeral would take place in two days time. Harry hardly knew how he was going to cope with so many funerals, so much sorrow, but first thing's first: he needed to get through today.
After getting dressed into his black dress robes (he had stayed at Hogwarts for the night along with Ron and Neville- Seamus and Dean had gone home to their respective families to sleep), Harry slowly dragged himself out of the dormitory to face whatever he would find on his way to the Great Hall. He was not hungry and even though the House Elves cooking was as good as ever, the black drapes that filled the Great Hall now signified not only Severus' funeral but the many who died in battle the previous night, caused Harry to lose his appetite.
So Harry found a place next to Hermione and picked at his food. Harry was surprised to see that a few of the Slytherins had stayed behind, undoubtedly to farewell their head of house and Headmaster for the last seven or so years. But Harry realised that even they did not know Severus as he did and wondered how they would react upon hearing Harry's eulogy about Professor Snape's past. Professor McGonagall, who had taken over the role of Head for now, was found to be sitting where Severus presumably sat while he was Headmaster and where Albus used to sit prior to that. Minerva looked very solemn as she ate and conversed in a restrained manner with Professor Flitwick. Perhaps she was afraid of what she would hear about Severus' past? Harry even wondered how much he should tell- he would have to decide once he was there and once he saw who had come. He suspected that the staff would be extremely curious to hear what Harry had to say, for it was now widely known that Harry had known of Professor Snape's true allegiance prior to arriving at Hogwarts the previous night.
20 minutes later, Ron and Neville joined Harry and Hermione at the Gryffindor table, none of them saying very much; apparently they could sense that Harry was distracted so left him to his thoughts. After what felt like an eternity of silence, lost deep in his thoughts, Harry looked at his watch to find that it was only 15 minutes until Severus' funeral was due to start. Some of the students had already started heading towards the grounds and Harry wondered how many of them would show up to honour their Headmaster for the last year. Deciding that he had better leave too, he stood up without saying anything to anyone and made his way to the Entrance Hall. Before he could reach it however, he was stopped by a girl's voice saying his name: "Harry."
Harry lifted his eyes, for he had been staring at the floor, to find himself locked into a captivating stare with Ginny. Harry was shocked, though he didn't really know why for the Weasley's said they would come to Severus' funeral before departing, but given that Harry had been so lost in thought the last few hours, he hardly noticed anyone except Ron and Hermione who had been with him through it all.
Upon seeing the kind and concerned look Ginny gave him, Harry felt like letting his guard down and talking to her, like he hadn't been able to with anyone else. Harry would love to be able to release some of the pain, guilt, sorrow and regret he had locked up inside of him, but he couldn't bring himself to do it- not yet. Seeing that Harry was lost for words, Ginny placed her hand gently in Harry's, squeezing it lightly as she encouraged Harry to take one step closer to where many were waiting for him to tell them exactly who Severus was: my friend.
XXXXXXXXXXXX
Harry couldn't quite believe just how many people had turned up for Severus' funeral. Harry had said last night, in a message he hoped reached everyone, that anyone who wished to come were invited to attend, but he had not expected so many or such a variety of people. Given Severus' reputation prior to his death, Harry expected that most were there to hear Harry's side of the story for he doubted that so many people actually cared that Severus was dead. However, Harry knew that Professor McGonagall was definitely one who was truly mourning for Severus and Harry didn't really understand why for none of the other teachers seemed similarly affected. Did something happen between her and Severus that Harry was unaware of?
One thing that Harry knew for certain was that the sum of their sorrow could not surpass what he himself felt as he stood on the podium facing about one hundred people, most of them being students and staff of Hogwarts. It was five minutes before they were due to start and Harry almost exclaimed out loud when he saw none other than the Malfoys, who arrived rather sneakily and sat at the back. Harry stared at them for a moment and when Draco noticed this, he turned pale and whispered hurriedly to his father who also looked up. But Harry was surprised to see that not even Lucius had given him a sneer, but simply stared at him as if waiting to see whether Harry was going to do anything about them being present. Of course, Harry was not about to eradicate them from the place; he knew that Lucius was a friend of Professor Snape's, though how good of a friend, Harry didn't know. But more importantly, he would never forget what Narcissa did- if she had not loved her son so much, Harry probably would be dead by now.
Soon after Voldemort's downfall, his Death Eaters were captured and sent to Azkaban which was now being monitored by witches and wizards, rather than Dementors. However, before the Malfoys could be taken, Harry vouched for them, explaining to Kingsley, who was filling in as the Minister for Magic, what had occurred between himself and Narcissa in the forest as well as his belief that Draco and Mr. Malfoy had learnt their lesson after the rough couple of years they had had at the hand of the Dark Lord himself. Kingley hesitantly agreed, much to the surprise of the Malfoys, who had witnessed the entire conversation. Soon after this moment, Harry's attention was drawn elsewhere so he did not have the opportunity to speak with the Malfoys, but now, he was glad to see that he had been right in his assertions: the Malfoys had come to pay their respects.
Harry knew it was time to start. Taking a deep breath and whispering: This is for you, Professor Snape, Harry began.
"Good morning everybody. We are here today to celebrate the life and mourn the death of Professor Severus Snape." Harry paused and suddenly felt the urgent need to say: "I admit that I am actually quite surprised to see so many people here; I was expecting much fewer and while I would like to think that you are here to mourn his death, I imagine most of you are more interested in his life, am I right?" Harry asked with a small smile on his face and almost laughed at a few people who couldn't help but nod with eagerness.
"Many of you may also be wondering why I am the one to give Professor Snape's eulogy for I think it was widely known that when I was at Hogwarts, he and I did not get along very well. Perhaps you think I have gone a bit crazy?" Harry suggested humorously. The joke probably stemmed from the deep sorrow he was feeling for Harry didn't know much longer he could go onto without laughing a little. Harry was glad to see a few people smile, including Ron and Hermione, both of them relieved that Harry was getting back to his old self again.
"Well I hope you will not mind if I do tell you the very little bit I did learn about Professor Snape before he died," Harry continued. "For I am sure it will be as much of a shock to you as it was to me."
It was in this moment that Harry wondered where he should start, eventually concluding that the beginning would be easiest and while he didn't know much of Severus' childhood, he knew about his relationship with Lily and that was a start.
"Severus Snape, for much of his life was a spy for Albus Dumbledore, who lied and tricked Voldemort and many of his Death Eaters into thinking that he was on their side and a spy for Voldemort. Consequently, Professor Snape had the very difficult job of protecting his true identity from either party. Therefore, it is no surprise that very few of us know anything about Professor Snape other than what we saw: glimpses of him being on our side, whichever side that may have been," Harry added, nodding towards the Malfoys in acknowledgment of their being on the opposing side until two nights ago.
"For Professor Snape to reveal anything about his personal life or his feelings, he would risk revealing whose side he was on, which would make what made his role as spy so effective, useless. The fact that no one knew anything about him made him successful in fooling Voldemort until the very end. The biggest secret Professor Snape managed to keep and one that would have alerted all of us to his true loyalties is the part of Severus' life where all of this began- his being a spy- and his desire to turn on the Death Eaters and Lord Voldemort himself."
By now, everyone was holding onto Harry's every word and Harry couldn't help being slightly amused, for that was exactly how he felt when he was in the Headmaster's office roughly a year ago, dying to know what it is that Severus was refusing point blank to tell him.
"Professor Snape loved my mother," Harry said simply, but then paused with a small smile on his face as he witnessed the many reactions he received. Professor McGonagall gasped and covered her mouth with her hands, staring wide eyed at Harry. Lucius was glaring at Harry in disbelief, but the most humorous reaction by far was Draco's for his mouth was hanging open for a ridiculous length of time and Harry wondered how long it would take for Professor Snape's 'favourite' student to get over the shock.
"I hardly believed it myself," Harry continued smiling. "I reacted like most of you have now. And even if I did refuse right there and then to believe him, all he would have had to show me is his Patronus for me to comprehend exactly what my mother meant to him. Professor Snape's Patronus is a doe, the same Patronus my mum had before she died. Clearly my mother remained a part of him, a constant reminder of what he lost and what he was working for. His Patronus was something you had to see to believe and I wish you all could have had the chance to see it, but I suppose that was not meant to be…" Harry looked up and saw once again that Professor McGongall, Lucius and Draco were all in a state of complete shock: especially Minerva for she had always wondered why Severus never communicated via his Patronus like the rest of the Order and now, she had her answer.
"But before I continue, please allow me to explain how it was that professor Snape came to the side of the Order. Many of you probably know that Professor Snape was in fact a Death Eater and while he was working for Voldemort, he was given the responsibility to secure a teaching position at Hogwarts. Severus was to meet Professor Dumbledore at the Hog's breath where he was to pretend he had reformed and wished to teach. Before he could even meet Dumbledore however, Severus was waiting outside the room in which Dumbledore was interviewing Professor Trelawney," Harry suddenly looked up, fearing that the woman was present; if she was, he knew that this eulogy would have greater implications for her than he had realised; when people found out that she was the one to make the prophecy about himself and Voldemort, she would be badgered and god knew what else. But thankfully, Harry couldn't see her and hoped that perhaps she was up in the castle.
"Severus did not know it, but in that moment he would be privy to information that changed my life forever, even though I was only very very young at that time. Professor Snape overheard Professor Trelawney make the prophecy that concerned myself and Voldemort."
Harry was expecting outcries at this information, but was amused to find that all of his listeners seemed to be shocked into silence, so Harry continued.
"Not knowing to whom the prophecy referred, Severus left the Hog's head but not before he was caught by Dumbledore, who for reasons I am still unsure about, let Severus leave the place."
"It took Voldemort a while to determine who it was that the prophecy referred to, but when he concluded it meant me, he set out multiple plans to plot my demise. When Severus realised how Voldemort had interpreted the prophecy, he knew my mother Lily, my father James and myself were in grave danger. He sought a meeting with Professor Dumbledore who eventually believed him and ensured Severus that he would protect me and my family from Voldemort as best he knew how. As we know, however," Harry said in a tone of sadness, though his smile showed that such feelings were not about to get him down. "Dumbledore's protection, though far from his fault, did not work forever. My father and my mother, of whom Severus still loved, were murdered and Professor Snape was, to say the least, deeply grieved and extremely remorseful for he knew that if he hadn't heard the prophecy and told Voldemort what it said, Lily, the woman he loved, may have lived. Soon after, Severus went to Dumbledore and in seeing how sorry Professor Snape was for the mistake he made, Dumbledore agreed to give him a job as a teacher at Hogwarts so that he would be close by to Dumbledore to feed him information about what the Death Eaters were doing without their master. In making this arrangement, Dumbledore, who was sure Voldemort would one day return, suggested that Professor Snape dedicate himself to protect me, if that day should come. In honour of Liily's sacrifice, Severus agreed and so, for my first six years at Hogwarts, Professor Snape did just that: he protected me and I even remember myself thinking that he was following me to catch me doing something wrong, when in fact, he was watching out for me. Given the relationship we had however, the last thing I expected was that he was there to protect me. And yet, he did until his dying moments, keep his word to Professor Dumbledore to ensure that my mother's death and her sacrifice was not in vain."
The audience was staring up at Harry in awe of what they were hearing; clearly they were not expecting this.
"And so I will finish this story by telling you how it was that I know all of this. After Dumbledore's death last year, I was determined to return to Hogwarts in order to speak to his portrait. However, when I did return, it was to find that Professor Snape had been made Headmaster of Hogwarts and that he had just settled into his quarters in the Headmaster's office which is, of course, where Professor Dumbledore's portrait is. Despite much persuasion from Dumbledore's portrait, Severus refused to tell me about his past and why he should be trusted, so in order to ensure that Severus got his wand back, for I had disarmed him, Dumbledore revealed to me the secret that Professor Snape made him swear not to tell a soul when he turned spy: that Severus loved my mother. But not only was I to discover this, but I also found out that Professors Dumbledore and Snape had planned Dumbledore's death together; believe it or not, Dumbledore wanted to Professor Snape to kill him that night for Dumbledore was going to die anyway due to an injury he had sustained earlier that year. Anyway, that story is for another time and besides, I think I had better get to the proper part of this funeral incase you all fall asleep!" Harry joked and saw that Ron was the only one to laugh; everyone else, it was evident to Harry were not even close to falling asleep and Harry couldn't blame them, not because he thought he was particularly good a public speaking, but because it seemed they were eager to hear who Severus truly was and how much he must have meant to Harry Potter for him to now be giving his eulogy.
"Professor Snape is more than I or perhaps any of us could have ever imagined. Not only was he capable of undying love for my mother which never wavered even when faced with lying to Voldemort and enduring multiple Cruciatus curses, a price you pay for being a servant to the Dark Lord. But I believe that the most difficult thing he has ever had to do as a spy is take the role of Headmaster this year."
At this, many of the students and staff looked at each other, as if wondering how that was possible.
"The night that I arrived at Hogwarts to talk to Professor Dumbledore's portrait, Professor Snape admitted to me that although he had promised Dumbledore that he would do everything in his power to protect the students and staff at Hogwarts, he had serious doubts about whether he could really do it. With two Death Eaters as fellow members of staff and with the entire school body believing him to be a loyal Death Eater, how was he going to protect them all whilst simultaneously pretending that he wanted them to suffer when around the Carrows? It was in that moment when I realised just how difficult it must have been to be a spy- to know which side you are truly on, but be forced to pretend you are their enemy- to be faced with people you care about and not be able to tell them how you truly feel. Professor Snape's true allegiance needed to be kept a secret and so he was forced to be someone he wasn't for the last sixteen years. At least now, although he is dead, people like yourselves are finally able to hear who he truly was- a man who sacrificed everything and ultimately his life to redeem himself, relieve himself of some of the guilt he felt for being partially responsible for my mother's death and to protect me as well as everyone at Hogwarts. If it was not for Professor Snape, think where we might all be right now- I may have died within the last six years- and if someone other than Professor Snape had been appointed Headmaster of Hogwarts this year, far more of you may have been tortured, injured or possibly even killed. I know we are all indebted to him, for his value as not only a spy but a human being allowed Dumbledore and himself to devise ways of protecting Hogwarts as well as ensure that I was successful in bringing down Voldemort."
Harry looked around and saw that Lucius looked like he had been slapped in the face- completely stunned that all this time, Severus was working for Dumbledore and more amazingly, that the Dark Lord was never able to detect it. Minerva was still staring at Harry; however she occasionally looked away at various moments shaking her head. Harry made a mental note to ask her later what it was that was causing her so much distress. But realizing Harry had paused a bit longer than he intended, he made to continue.
"Being extremely skilled at both Occlumency and Legilimency, even more so than the Dark Lord himself, as well as his ability to remain detached and his skills in potions and defense against the dark arts, made Professor Snape a very valuable ally and spy. After sacrificing so much of his time and energy into fighting along side us, even though few of us actually trusted him, it is only now that he is getting the credit he truly deserves. I unfortunately did not get to see Professor Snape often this year, but I will admit that whenever I did, I smiled when I saw him. It is strange to admit it to all of you, but I looked forward to seeing him because it was a reminder that everything I had heard about Professor Snape's past with regard to my mother and Dumbledore was not a lie- that it was true- underneath his cold and detached exterior, there was a man who was capable of sacrifice, love and hope. Given only the small time I was in his presence this year, I will go as far to say that Professor Snape is no longer my Professor and not even a spy and definitely not simply the man who loved my mother, but my friend and someone who I will never forget. Throughout this year, he was a source of support for me, someone who I could rely on and someone who right up until his death, believed in me- believed I could do what seemed to be impossible. He gave me courage when I had none and understood my suffering more than most others ever could, for he had suffered just like I had- sacrificed and seen horrors just like I had and while I didn't know it for the last six years, all this time he would have been willing to go there with me if it meant he could help me stay alive. When I first came to Hogwarts, I think that his desire to watch over me was for Lily- to ensure I stayed alive for her sake. But last night, towards the very end of his life, I cannot help but hope that he was there to watch over me, to protect me as long as humanly possible, not simply because I was Lily's son, but because he cared for me regardless of who my parents were. Professor Snape and I got to know a lot about one another this year and so, I had no hesitation in volunteering to give a eulogy at his funeral, which he definitely deserves. After all this time, having kept his secret safe, having struggled between telling the truth and keeping his role as spy, Professor Snape finally gets to be acknowledged in your eyes for the man he truly was: a very brave, courageous and skillful wizard who we all should have been glad to have on our side, even though we didn't know for certain at the time, we now know that without him, this world could have been a very different place."
Harry couldn't believe how long he had been talking and although his audience was not tiring, he sure was, so was relieved to realize that he was near the end of the speech he had prepared in his mind.
"I cannot believe that there was a time in my life when I wished Professor Snape was not in it, and now I cannot imagine what my life would have been like without him. A man who loved and made every sacrifice in honour of that love and helped me battle through each and every year to this very moment, Severus Snape has impacted my life in a way I can hardly believe and now I only wish I could have known him sooner and spoken to him without the pressure of Voldemort's incoming attack right behind us. That was our intention, Professor Snape's and mine, to talk once Voldemort had fallen and while we will never have that chance, I only hope that he is happy wherever he is because he deserves to be. I can only hope that one day I will have the opportunity to tell him how much he means to me and to thank him for being more than any of us, even he, could have ever believed. He was the bravest and very best of men and I feel privileged to call him my friend. You are free now," Harry said, looking past all of his audience and to the horizon. "Rest in peace Professor Snape, we will always remember you," Harry finished, struggling to hold back tears. It wasn't that he felt sad, but relieved that he had managed to honour Severus' life and many sacrifices.
Once Harry had finished his eulogy, he was surprised to hear applause. It would seem that some of the students had started the applause and one by one everyone else joined in. Harry smiled as he walked down from the podium; he was flattered that his audience had appreciated his eulogy for he was pretty sure clapping was not common at funerals. But Harry was certain that the applause wasn't really for him, but for Severus.
After the ceremony ended, people were free to walk up to the closed coffin if they wished to pay their respects. Harry was tempted to stand by and watch to see what people said or did once they reached the tomb, but the Weasley's were leaving for it was urgent that they get back to the Burrow and organize the funerals for Fred, Tonks and Remus. Harry walked to the Weasleys who were seated in the third row and farewelled each of them in turn.
"Excellent eulogy Harry," Percy asserted, shaking Harry's hand.
"Yes, it was very good Harry, I still cannot believe the truth of it myself," Mr. Weasley said, also shaking Harry's hand. "Severus was so much more than even Albus let on. All those times in Grimmauld place during our meetings, the way he behaved around us, he always seemed so cold…"
"And who could blame him?" Mrs Weasley added eager to give Harry a hug. "He may have had to go to a Death Eater meeting straight after. You never know… He could hardly be nice to us, it- it was never his way," she continued. "Well done Harry, you did Professor Snape justice. Clearly he meant a lot to you," she added gently.
"He did, Mrs Weasley," Harry said quietly.
"Now take care, Harry and we'll see you at the Burrow soon, okay?" Mr. Weasley said as he made his way towards an empty clearing where he and his family could Apparate. "We will be expecting you some time tomorrow."
"Yep, I'll see you then!" Harry said as he waved goodbye to the Weasley's.
George, who understandably had not spoken much since his twin's death simply waved to Harry as he Apparated out of sight. Only Ron, Hermione and Ginny remained and seeing who was left, Ron and Hermione went off together leaving Harry alone with Ginny.
"You gave a beautiful eulogy, Harry," Ginny said, walking towards him.
"Thanks," Harry said, looking away towards the ground. He didn't really know where he and Ginny were in terms of their relationship and didn't want to look at her in the way he so badly wanted to incase she wasn't ready to resume their relationship just yet.
"Are you going to be okay between now and when I next see you?"
Harry laughed a little. "How much trouble can I get into in one day?"
"Well past experience would suggest that a day is plenty of time for you to get into mischief," Ginny said teasingly. "I am looking forward to the end of all the funerals… It will be nice to not feel so sad," Ginny whispered and for a moment Harry had a tremendous urge to hug her.
"I know what you mean… It will be nice to move on and yet, so hard to leave everything behind," replied Harry.
But Ginny didn't respond; she was looking at Harry with a blazing stare. Harry couldn't help but return the intensity of her gaze. In that moment, Harry knew what Ginny was feeling, but knew better than to do anything about his own feelings now; they both needed to get through these next few days and then they could start their relationship again.
"Goodbye Harry," Ginny said, still staring at him.
"Bye Ginny," Harry replied and then pulled her towards him so he could hug her.
Be strong Ginny, I will be with you again soon.
XXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Professor McGonagall!" Harry called out once Ginny had Apparated with George to the Burrow.
"Yes, Potter?" Minerva replied turning around.
"I noticed, when I was saying Professor Snape's eulogy that you looked… confused at times and other times you looked distressed. What was that all about?" Harry questioned, wondering if he was prying too far, but hoped, given the emotional level of the day that perhaps his professor would be willing to tell him more.
Discomforted slightly by the fact that her thoughts and feelings were so transparent, Minerva soon recovered and said to Harry:
"Before Albus was killed, I always trusted Severus, despite how he appeared I trusted him because Albus did. But once Albus was dead, killed by Severus, of course, I was determined to think ill of him, determined to find him evil and dark as would be expected from a murderer. But when he became Headmaster and I was forced to work withhim, I could not see him completely as a Death Eater… I was furious with myself for defaming Albus' memory by thinking that his killer, though guilty, was not as terrible as everyone else was willing to believe. From the very beginning, I tried to however slyly, find out more and although he never strictly said anything that wasn't as every bit as rude and dark as one would expect from a Death Eater, his expressions and the way he behaved told me different. It puzzled me greatly, Potter and the more I interacted with him the angrier I became because I was so sure there was MORE to him then he was showing me. If there was one thing I knew about Severus it was that he was more than a Death Eater; he was complicated. I tried to test him, challenge him, tried to force the side of him I knew was there but had no proof to show for my suspicions. And just when I had given up on finding any good in him, I saw how he behaved towards you the other night, the way he looked at you and I realised that the evidence was there all along; he never once hurt a student, even though I always suggested he would and he kept all of them safe whenever you could manage it. But the biggest shock for me was when we dueled, he never once aimed to kill or even injure, everything he did was in self defense and after an entire school year, it is only now that I can see what has been there all along. And then, hearing about his past from you this morning, Potter, made me understand why he was hiding and what he was hiding. I understand now and all I can hope is that wherever he is now, he will forgive me for being so harsh to him during his final year of life. It is a shame that it is only in death that the truth about his life is revealed…"
"You could not have known Professor and I am sure he would value your belief in his goodness even though you could find no evidence for it," Harry reassured Minerva.
"I truly hope so- there can be no doubt that the man was brilliant- he played his part exceedingly well."
Harry nodded. "He fooled us all," Harry said with a smile.
"That he did," Minerva reinforced, smiling too. "And now we must thank him for doing such a marvelous job. His skill and bravery does him great credit and I believe I will miss him now… now that he is no longer here," McGonagall admitted.
"Me too," Harry said gently. Oh Professor, I forgot to ask, did you get Professor Snape's portrait so I can put it up in the Headmaster's office?"
"Oh!" Minerva said surprised as if she too had forgotten. "Of course, it came in early this morning. Come with me Potter," she beckoned and Harry followed, signaling to Ron and Hermione that he would be back soon.
Minerva led Harry to her office and as they walked inside, Harry spotted immediately a picture frame on the ground, leaning up against the wall. Harry walked over and turned the front towards him to find that there was no portrait inside.
"Um Professor?" Harry started and upon hearing Minerva's reply, he said: "Where is Professor Snape's picture?"
"Oh yes, bring the frame over to me," Minerva indicated, pointing to her desk at which she was now sitting. Harry brought the rather large frame over and watched as McGonagall pulled out her wand, muttering an incantation under her breath.
Then she paused and Harry was waiting with bated breath to find out how Headmaster's portraits were made. Finally, instead of saying whatever it was that needed to be said, Minerva beckoned Harry over to her right side, keeping her finger to her lips indicating that Harry should not talk. Harry did as he was silently told and when he reached her, Minerva quickly wrote on a piece of paper: "Say: Professor Severus Snape."
Harry looked at Minerva with wide eyes, but she nodded her encouragement and so Harry said with confidence and a huge amount of curiosity.
"Professor Severus Snape."
And then suddenly a picture began to materialize in front of Harry and it only took a few seconds before a portrait of Severus was fully formed before him.
"Hi Professor Snape," Harry greeted, clearly happy to see the man again.
"Good afternoon Harry," Severus replied. "Good afternoon Professor McGonagall," Severus continued, turning towards Minerva.
"Hello Severus, how do you like your portrait?" she asked, smiling at the man for the first time she could remember.
Snape looked down at himself and gave a grin of satisfaction.
"Hmm, it seems creative; much different from the other Heads."
It was only then that Harry could fully comprehend the completed portrait in front of him. Instead of seeing him sitting at a desk like all of the other Headmasters, Severus was standing, his wand in his hand, and a determined look on his face, or at least, that's how he appeared before he began moving.
Now that Harry had Severus' portrait in his hands, it was clear to Minerva that the boy wanted to talk to the previous Headmaster, so she suggested that Harry take it up to the Headmaster's office where a space had been made for the new addition. Harry agreed without hesitation, said thank you to Professor McGonagall and left her office, holding Severus' portrait out in front of him.
When they reached the flight of stairs, Severus was the first to speak; it seemed that Harry was still amazed that Professor Snape was right in front of him and although dead, he was able to talk to the man like he had always hoped.
"Thank you for the eulogy Harry."
Harry's eyes widened. "You- you heard?" Harry stuttered, for it had never occurred to him that he would ever discuss his eulogy with Severus.
"Of course," Severus replied smiling. "I concluded many years ago that I would die without so much as a funeral let alone Harry Potter giving my eulogy. I was there in spirit."
Harry laughed a little. "Well I am glad you liked it Professor."
But for the remainder of the walk up to the Headmaster's office neither Harry nor Severus said anything; Harry was lost in thought and Severus did not want to disturb the boy for he knew that there would be plenty of opportunity later to talk to each other.
Finally when they reached the Headmaster's office and Harry placed Severus' portrait in its rightful place, Harry stared at the portrait, hardly knowing what to say.
When he eventually found his voice, he asked:
"Do you know why Professor McGonagall asked me to say your name when we were making your portrait?" Severus thought that perhaps this is what Harry was thinking in those silent moments as they walked up the many staircases.
"I am not entirely sure of her intentions," Severus began. "Usually when someone has been appointed Headmaster by the Ministry, a magical-" Severus paused to find the word, "connection is formed between the Headmaster and Hogwarts so when a Headmaster dies or formally retires, it would seem that the castle itself is aware of the loss and creates a portrait of that Headmaster and sits in this office until someone arrives to place it on the wall. However, given the process involved in my appointment, the connection between Hogwarts and myself was not formed, for it was the Dark Lord, not the Ministry that appointed me my position. Knowing that you wanted my portrait to reside in this office, for which I thank you," Severus added as Harry tilted his head in acknowledgement. "I would imagine Professor McGonagall planned to create the portrait herself. After completing the required enchantment, the name you say immediately following is who the portrait will be of. However, the magic works in such a way that the person who says the name will impart their perception of the person they are trying to remember into the portrait."
Harry gaped.
"So," Severus continued, slightly amused by Harry's expression. "In my case, it would seem that how I appear is how you see me," Severus explained, looking down at himself as if trying to analyse exactly how Harry did perceive him.
"Well- well I guess that is how I perceive you… fighting, defending yourself, powerful…" Harry whispered, trailing off towards the end for he was certain that Severus could hear him.
"Thank you, Harry."
And once again, Harry and Severus stared at one another, Harry wanting to say so much, but given everything that had happened- the grief and the many funerals to come, he didn't feel like talking for the moment.
"I- I wish I could stay but I need to go… funerals to go to-" Harry said awkwardly, afraid that Severus would be offended, but of course Severus understood more than Harry could ever know.
"Take care, Harry."
"Thanks… I'll be back," Harry added quickly, wanting to reassure Severus that he wasn't abandoning the man and still wanted to talk.
"I know you will," Severus said gently.
"Okay, well, bye then," said Harry as he stared briefly at Severus' portrait before leaving the office, an imprint of Severus' portrait etched in his mind.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Welcome, Severus," Albus greeted his former colleague and spy.
"Thank you Albus."
"It seems Harry is rather distracted at the moment," Albus stated, a solemn look on his face.
"I am sure he will be fine," Severus replied, though didn't feel as confident as he sounded; of course, he worried about Harry too.
Albus nodded. "It seems he has not yet received your Will," Albus pointed out as if he were talking about the weather.
Severus stared at him.
Once he found his voice Severus asked furiously: "You knew all this time what I was writing?"
"Yes and although I tried my utmost to determine exactly what you were writing, I did not succeed for you made certain of that. But yes, I was aware that it was your Will and assumed your possessions would have been given to Harry. Was I correct?"
Severus was in such a mood that he was tempted to not dignify Albus' question with an answer. However, he decided to at least correct the man in one respect.
"Yes, I did allocated almost all of my belongings to Harry, however, what I was writing that night was not my Will."
Now it was Albus' turn to stare at the man. "Well my dear man, you must tell me more!" Albus exclaimed positively cheerful.
But at this, Severus simply smiled. "You will have to wait until Harry returns."
And even though he was being refused the information he had been so curious about for so long, Albus being of good humour smiled and changed the topic of conversation onto much more trivial things.
XXXXXXXXXXXX
Harry had only just walked outside in search of Ron and Hermione when Percy ran up to him, huffing and puffing, a parchment envelope in his hand.
"Percy! I thought you had returned to the Burrow!" Harry exclaimed, shocked the see him again so soon.
"I- was-" Percy puffed. "But then I was summoned to the Ministry and was asked to give you this," Percy explained, holding out the envelope for Harry to take.
"What is it?" Harry asked, not sure whether he should open it now or later.
"I am not sure, but I was told that you should open it in a private location and preferably without disturbance. It would seem that this is a serious document," Percy stated, looking at the envelope clenched in Harry's hand.
"Okay," Harry said hesitantly. "I will look at it soon, thanks Percy."
"No problem, see you tomorrow Harry," Percy said, waving as he ran to the clearing and Apparated.
Harry then continued his search for Ron and Hermione and eventually found them near the lake, sitting side by side, Ron's arm around Hermione's waist. Harry smiled a little and began wondering whether Ron and Hermione would go back to the Burrow or stay with him, when his train of thought was interrupted by movement from his right. Looking up he saw three people huddled together, the only three that remained from the original crowd of people who had gathered for Severus' funeral. As Harry approached them, he realised with great surprise that it was the Malfoys. Harry stood and observed them as they slowly walked towards Severus' tomb, speaking quietly to one another, eventually stopping when the reached the white coffin.
"Hey." Harry jumped at the voice behind him, but recognized it immediately to be Ron.
"What are you staring at?" He continued and then, upon following Harry's line of sight, found his answer.
"I thought the Malfoys would have left by now," Hermione whispered.
"Me too," Harry replied. "I wonder what they are doing."
"No idea, but I bet they are up to no good," Ron mumbled.
"Come on Ron! Can't you see they have changed? Mr. Malfoy was good friends with Professor Snape and we cannot forget that Professor Snape protected Draco last year… they owe Professor Snape, they are probably here to pay their respects."
Harry was tempted to agree with Hermione and was about to say so when the Malfoys walked away, Narcissa kissing her finger tips and touching them to the white stone as she left. Realising that the closest location to Apparate was near where they were standing, Harry, Ron and Hermione quickly glanced at one another, each of them not quite sure what to do when the Malfoys eventually spotted them.
Harry was waiting with bated breath as the Malfoys grew closer still talking amongst themselves. Draco was the first to see them however and immediately told his parents, all three of them stopping in their tracks. Harry, Ron and Hermione simply stared, Harry with a small smile on his face; despite everything that had happened between Draco and himself, he would always be grateful to Narcissa for her part in the final battle.
Feeling that it would be safe, the Malfoys continued walking towards the trio pausing a moment to nod in recognition before walking past, Narcissa placing a gentle hand on Harry's shoulder before she too followed her husband and son.
Ron was gobsmacked by Narcissa's gesture and even Harry was shocked as the three of them stared after the Malfoys. While Harry was certain he could never be friends with Draco and his family, he knew that in that moment, they at least understood one another.
After the shock of the Malfoys presence faded, Harry turned to Ron and asked:
"Are you going back to the Burrow?"
"Yeah, I am. I think I should spend some time with my family and help out with the- the funerals… Hermione and me were just talking about it and she is happy to stay with you."
"But only if you want me to Harry," Hermione added a little nervously and Harry thought that perhaps both of his friends were uncertain whether he wanted to be alone or have some company.
"It would be nice to have someone with me," Harry mumbled, grateful to both of his friends for thinking of him given everything that had happened.
"Especially when I read this," Harry continued, holding up the parchment for his friends to see.
"Oh, I did not even notice you had it!" Hermione exclaimed. "What is it?"
"I don't know, Percy delivered it to me, saying it was a serious document and should be read in private."
Hermione was eager to find out what it was, as was Harry of course and after promising they would update him tomorrow, Ron Apparated away leaving Harry and Hermione to lower Severus' coffin into the ground, after which they would return to Grimmauld place and open the envelope Harry continued to hold tightly in his hand.
"Goodbye Professor Snape," Harry whispered as he watched Hermione lower the white coffin into the ground some meters from the funeral site. But of course Harry knew that this wasn't really goodbye, for Severus was not only in the Headmaster's office, but with him in spirit, forever a part of him and Harry would never forget that.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
A/N: I hope you guys liked the chapter! I have not begun to write Chapter 12 yet (though you can probably guess what the next chapter will be about) so it may take me a while to update. But I promise to do it as soon as I can Many thanks for reading! Please don't forget to review!