A/N: My thanks to all for reading, reviewing, favoriting, alerting and plain old, giving this fic a try. I appreciate you more than I can say.

What would I do without katmom? Present you with a frowzy, un-beta'ed mess, that's what. I'd also like to thank contentedtwicow for pre-reading. Any remaining errors are all mine. kzintikiller and corona on Twilight Lexicon helped with consulting on vampire healing, and I thank you as well.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all the characters, I'm just playing in her sandbox. No copyright infringement is intended.

Ch. 10 Exile

My mind was roiling with thoughts and feelings. The realization that loving Edward and being with him did not make everything bearable sent me reeling, and I started to hyperventilate. That seemed odd to me since I didn't need the air. I did need some time to get my feet back under me.

I took several deep breaths. While I was still very unhappy, the moping was not getting me anywhere. All of this was just too unfamiliar – living in a new room with a house full of people, all the myriad sensations whizzing through my brain and my mental processes splintering off to follow them – it all served to unnerve me and added to my emotional distress. Maybe doing something mindless and mundane, but familiar, might ground me and give my mind a chance to process.

"Edward." I picked a piece of lint from his collar. "Thanks for trying to cheer me up. I feel a little better now." I hated lying to him but I needed some time by myself to think.

Edward looked at me with a hint of surprise on his face. Then a hesitant smile touched his lips and he stroked my hair. "You feel better?"

I nodded, glad he couldn't hear my thoughts. "I'm not one-hundred percent, but I'm a little better."

"I'm so glad," he said with real relief in his voice.

I had been too distracted after my shower to properly deal with my hair, and tried futilely to smooth it with my hands, finally just pulling it all to one side and down my shoulder. Crying used to leave my face blotchy but that wouldn't be the case anymore. "So, what was the original plan going to be? If I hadn't…you know…" my voice trailed off.

Edward shushed me. "Try not to think about it, love." He gave me a reassuring squeeze. "It depended on how wild you were."

"What do you mean?"

"If we could take care of you here, we would stay. We still had a few years planned here. But if you proved to be too wild, we would leave."

"Oh." I thought for a moment. "So am I too wild?"

Edward kept his expression neutral. "Not too wild," he answered carefully. "But we can't leave just now. If we leave suddenly, this close to an accident, that alone could raise suspicion."

"So we wait."

"We watch and we wait," Edward agreed.

I sat up and took in the state of Edward's clothes. His slacks were soiled with dirt and grass from our hunting trip. His shirt was stained with some of the venom-fluid that had seeped from his injury. I plucked at the stained area.

"I told you to change into something sturdier," I commented.

Edward's lip turned in a sardonic smile. "I don't usually wrestle with my food. I leave that to Emmett."

"Well, I'll have to take your clothes to the cleaners."

"No, I think I should do that for now," Edward said softly, trying not to offend me.

I shook my head. "Actually, if we're going to be waiting around, I kinda need something normal to do. I thought I'd help Esme around the house. Did you do your laundry from the trip yet?

"Not yet," Edward replied. "It's still in the hamper in the closet. We were a little busy the last couple days."

"Right. Well, I feel…okay enough." I looked over at Jasper.

Jasper took my measure, shrugged and nodded. "Not too bad."

"Okay, I'm going to do some laundry. I don't think I'll get in too much trouble doing that."

Edward and Jasper traded a look. "You don't need to do my laundry, Bella." Edward said, the cautious concern still in his eyes.

"Yes, I do. I can't just sit around while we wait to find out what's going to happen. I need something to do or I'll go nuts thinking about what I've done and want to run off again. Besides, you need to rest your ribs." I rose from the sofa and walked into the closet, where I found the laundry hamper. "Sorry about your shelves," I called.

Edward followed me into the closet. "It's no big deal," he said. "Can you help me with my shirt, love?"

I turned to him, a little hesitantly. He had the buttons undone, and was unbuttoning the cuffs. I drew in a breath involuntarily. "Um, sure."

I helped Edward shrug out of his shirt and he gritted his teeth as his torso flexed. His chiseled muscles rippled under his translucent skin, just as beautiful as always. But then I saw the bandages swathing his chest and winced. My hand rose, then stopped, my fingers hovering an inch away from the injured area.

"What did Carlisle do?" I wondered.

Looking down at his chest, Edward explained. "It's a venom poultice. Gauze soaked in venom, to bathe the wound. Given time, the venom in my body would heal the injury; this just helps speed the process."

"Oh."

His hands began to reach for me, and his foot started to shift forward. I knew what he wanted, but on some impulse, I turned away quickly and stuffed the shirt into the hamper, picking it up in one motion. I gave him a wan smile. "Do you need help with the pants, too?"

A look of surprise fell over Edward's face. "N-no, I can manage," he stuttered.

"Be done soon." I quickly left with the hamper.

The laundry room was on the lowest level of the house, down some stairs from the kitchen and next to the rec room. The washer and dryer stood along the wall to the left of the door, and a folding table was built into the wall opposite the door. Even in this room, a large window opened onto the verdant forest. The equipment was larger, more modern than what I was used to, and it took a moment for me to figure out how to operate them. I separated the darks from the whites and started one load of whites. As I worked, my thoughts ran wildly around my head.

What was wrong with me? Why did I feel this way? As unhappy as I was, I still felt the connection with Edward. I knew it as surely as the day he'd saved me at Port Angeles. But for once, I didn't want to touch him. Edward taking his shirt off had been, for him, an open invitation, and I had turned away! What changed? Ever since that day in biology class, after he said he cared for me, the touch of his hand was like a drug. During the entire class it had taken all my strength not to reach out, to cross the void between us and touch his arm or caress his face. I yearned for his touch, as he had yearned for my blood. Once we had crossed that threshold, his physical presence, his tactile communication was something I craved daily.

As I examined it, there seemed to be more than one reason. Part of it was the fear that I would hurt him. Being stronger than he was, and not completely able to control myself, that was a real risk. I tried to remember what I could about attacking him, but the images I recalled were rather detached, like my mind was no longer in control, but along for the ride. They were also hazy, like some of my human memories. Until I could understand what triggered the attacks and how to control it, I couldn't trust myself around him.

But there was a part that had nothing to do with the physical risk. Was it because of my new vampire body? When I had traded in my fragile, hormone-laden body, had I also given up the overwhelming, physical passion I felt for him? A brief panic flared up in me and I had to stop and think logically. The way the other family members acted with their partners; they seemed to be just as affectionate with each other as Edward and I once were. And the way my new body was even more sensitive to touch, smell and the other senses, lack of feeling couldn't explain it either. The cause seemed more ephemeral, and escaped my attempts to pin it down. No matter how hard I tried to figure it out, it slipped away.

"Ugh!" I groaned in frustration. Then lest frustration should lead to anger, I closed my eyes and started taking deep, slow breaths. It wouldn't do to destroy Esme's laundry room. I gave my head a shake and gave up. Maybe it would come later after I had more time to chew on it.

I checked the dryer, found a load of clothes already finished, so pulled them out and started folding them. From the size they might have been Edward's, Jasper's or Carlisle's. When I saw the "CC" monogram on one of the shirts I knew they were Carlisle's. I set the shirts aside for ironing later.

A light step on the laundry room stairs announced someone's arrival. I took several deep breaths to relax myself, then looked up to see Esme watching me from the doorway.

"Hi, Esme." I wasn't sure if I should refer to her as "mom" yet, so stuck with what I knew.

"I was wondering who was working down here," she replied, as she approached the pile of clean clothes I was sorting.

"I hope you don't mind. I needed to get back to something familiar. I don't need to cook anymore, so I thought I'd get our laundry done."

"That's quite all right, dear. Let me help you." Esme carried some of the shirts over to the ironing board and switched on the iron. "Are you feeling better?"

"A little," I hedged.

Esme searched my face for a moment. She took a shirt, shook it out and started spreading it on the board. "But you're still having trouble, aren't you?"

I nodded. She could read me so easily, it reminded me of Renee. I felt a little pang at the thought of my mother.

"Give yourself some time." Esme's gentle voice reached out soothingly. "You're only really a day-old in this life. It will take time for you to gain control over your new mind and body."

"I'm not sure if it's a matter of having enough time," I spoke sadly. "I…I killed…" I couldn't go on.

Esme pursed her lips. "Hush, dear," she said quietly, and patted me on the shoulder. "It will be all right."

I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath. Then another, pushing the unpleasant thoughts away and thinking of a blank wall. "I'm okay, Esme, really. I need to learn how to handle this sometime."

Esme watched while my breathing returned to normal. She checked the iron, picked it up and began to run it over Carlisle's shirt. "As I said, give yourself some time. It's not as if you have some kind of deadline to meet. I know you're still quite upset now. But there is one thing you can do to help with the adjustment."

"What's that?" I wondered. Anything that might help would be welcome.

"Right now, you're still thinking too human. While that is all you know, you're not human anymore, and that comes with some new realities."

"But, they were my friends–" I stammered.

"I know, and I sympathize. But at the risk of sounding callous, would it have been any better if they had been perfect strangers?"

I thought about it for a while. What if the faces were unknown to me? It could have been anybody that fate had thrown in front of my path. I vaguely remembered Jacob telling me of the hikers who had disappeared, killed by Victoria during her hunt for me. Though I didn't know their names, they still didn't deserve to die. I shook my head. "No, it wouldn't."

"If you had been born into another coven, the hunting of humans would be normal. Expected even. Nobody would fault you for it there, and while I know it saddens Carlisle, we understand how hard it is to resist. There have been accidents before, and there may be more accidents later. It truly is part of this life you've chosen. You may not wish to be a hunter of humans, but it is part of you."

"But we don't do that," I objected.

"No, we don't. We choose to deny that behavior, but it's part of our nature nonetheless. You will need to let go of some of that human thinking before you can adjust completely to this life."

I searched Esme's eyes of liquid gold. "Is that what helped you?"

Esme nodded, thoughtfully. "Do you believe I'm capable of killing?"

I shook my head. "You're so gentle, and you care so much for people, it just doesn't seem possible."

She smiled at my naïve assumption. "You're still thinking human. I'll be the first to tell you that I didn't have Carlisle or Edward's strength of will when I was newborn." Esme paused to shake out a pair of slacks, before continuing.

"It was one of the neighbors, near where we were living at the time. I didn't know who it was because I was still new to living in Carlisle's household. Once the madness and the thirst subsided, I felt remorse just like you do now. It took some time, and Carlisle's patient care, for me to realize that this was part of who I was now; this is what we must do to survive. I could no more blame myself than blame a wolf for killing and eating a lamb. It's still part of the natural way of things, only a part that I had never seen before. But now, because of Carlisle's way, I have no reason to feel remorse over the way I live."

Think of myself as a predator? Right off, that didn't sound right to me. All my human life, I'd tried to blend in. I never got in fights, never was the aggressor even in social situations. But obviously, my new body had other ideas.

"How do we stop from attacking somebody?" I wondered.

Esme sighed. "I didn't say it's easy. When we scent blood, the hunting instinct takes over. It's like the most delectable meal you've ever smelled is waiting for you on the table, but you must not give in – you must keep yourself from reaching out and taking it. Time helps because your body will settle down and not need to drink so much. I dare say you've probably never felt anything this intense in your human life, and until you're used to that feeling it will be hard to control.

"It also helps if you think about who they are; they're people, with families and friends, brothers and sisters. If you strike, someone's father does not come home. If you give in, a family loses a child. They're not simply cattle sitting in a feedlot.

"All of us have struggled with this, and except for Carlisle, continue to struggle. One day, you too, will be able to resist. It will take time, and you won't be able to go among humans for a while. But for now, for your own well-being, you have to be able to forgive yourself, and that means letting go of some of those human sentiments."

I felt dejected at the thought of it. Eighteen years of thinking and habits wasn't something that could be discarded overnight. Since those sentiments were part of what I considered my humanity, I didn't even know if I wanted to lose any of it. "It's not going to be easy."

Esme put down the iron, approached me slowly, and wrapped me in a hug. Not trusting my control, I kept my arms at my sides and let myself be gathered in. "Be patient. Give your mind and body time to adjust to each other. That's the best you can do for yourself. Remember, we'll be here to help you."

"Thanks, Esme," I said with a sigh. I was so lucky. In some stories I had read, some brides had to wait for years before they were finally accepted by their mother-in-law, or were never accepted at all. Apparently Esme was sincere when she had said she already considered me part of the family when I was human.

Esme kissed me on the forehead. "Let's see about this laundry now, shall we?"

= = CR = = CR = = CR = =

We chatted easily as we folded and ironed the rest of the laundry. It was a good exercise in controlling my strength, and fortunately it was only an old pair of Edward's jeans that suffered from my lack of control. Esme laughed and said she had done the same thing herself. Once I began paying attention to what I was doing, I did much better.

I wondered where I would fit in the household. It was only a loose household in the traditional sense. All of the 'children' were essentially grown-up, and moved out on occasion. When they were all together, Esme fell easily into the role of mother for all of them. Housekeeping and chores were only necessary as far as keeping up appearances for the humans required. Technically, clothes were also for the sake of appearance since the weather didn't affect us, but a naked vampire was sure to draw attention.

I also didn't need to cook anymore, and while no master chef, I figured I was a half-decent cook. Part of me, a more human part, was disappointed that I'd never be able to make Edward happy in the same way I'd done for Charlie.

While we worked, night fell. We didn't need extra light to see, but the dim, ambient light made the colors look odd, so sorting socks was a challenge. As I turned on the lights we were interrupted by a call from Alice. "We have company coming!" she called to everyone in the house.

"Who is it?" I asked, not loudly as I knew she would hear. Edward and Carlisle's voices echoed my question.

"It's the wolf pack," Alice replied.

A shock ran through me. Would Jacob be with them? I hadn't thought about what I would say to him the next time I saw him, especially after my change. The first time he had found out I wanted to become a vampire, he reacted very badly. I couldn't imagine this would go any better.

I looked at Esme. "I don't know what to say to Jacob," I confessed.

Esme raised her eyebrows and shrugged. "Maybe you won't have to say anything."

Not likely, knowing Jacob. I didn't answer, and we put down our work and left the laundry room, walking upstairs. Looking down at myself, I realized I was still wearing a t-shirt and sweats. Breaking into a run, I dashed up to our room, passing the others on their way down the stairs. Edward raised an eyebrow as I passed him, and I blurted that I was going up to change. Once in the closet, I quickly undressed, then pulled on jeans and a light-grey, chambray shirt. I grabbed a hair tie and hurried downstairs to the main landing, where the rest of the family was congregating. Working quickly, I pulled my hair into a low pony-tail as I descended.

"What did you see?" Carlisle asked Alice.

Alice's brow was furrowed with worry. "Everybody in the family just disappeared. That could only mean one thing. The wolves are coming."

Carlisle's expression was not happy. "The last time everybody disappeared for you, we were coordinating to fight together. There's been no warning this time. Let's start shutting down the house and get ready to go. Can you see how long before we disappear?"

Alice scrunched her eyes closed, concentrating. "It's hard to say. Maybe about twenty minutes?"

"We don't have much time. Let's get started everybody!" he called.

Everybody separated for different parts of the house. Confused as to what I should be doing, I hesitated. Edward touched my shoulder. "Come with me, Bella," he said, then rushed up the stairs at vampire speed. I hurried to follow him. He didn't stop at our room, and continued upstairs to the attic.

I hadn't been up to the attic before; it was the one place in the house I hadn't entered while I was human. Now that I was here I stopped in surprise. It looked like some kind of command center. A number of computers and monitors stood on one table, and an array of radio equipment stood on another. A sophisticated looking printer and scanner stood on a stand in the corner. Emmett was already there.

Edward and Emmett began shutting down the equipment. While the computers were powering down, Edward handed me a file crate of papers. "We have to take the computers with personal information on them," he explained. "Anything that would have a trace of who we are, we can't leave behind. Take this out to the garage and come back for more."

"Okay." I turned to go. As I hurried down the stairs, I couldn't help but wonder at the way my body worked. I did get distracted and stumble on one flight of stairs, at a speed that would have guaranteed an accident once before, but my body took over and righted me again. When I got back to the attic, Edward handed me six flat screen computer monitors and followed me to the garage carrying two of the computers. The load was light and I could have carried much more, but that's all that could fit in my arms.

After we deposited our load in the garage and returned to the house, Edward froze on the front porch, his attitude one of listening.

"What is it?" I asked.

He looked at me, but called out, "Carlisle! Jacob Black is coming!" Then he flicked his head up the stairs indicating that I should follow. We rushed back inside and were met by Carlisle, Jasper, Emmett and Esme.

"Jacob is coming, alone it seems," Edward said, his expression grave. "The wolves know."

Carlisle shook his head. "Esme, take the girls and keep getting things ready to go. Edward, Jasper, come with me. Emmett, stay out of sight. We don't want to antagonize him. But stay close." Emmett and Jasper nodded.

Edward turned to me and asked, "Bella, do you think it's a good idea for him to see you?"

I considered it for a moment, then shook my head. But I had to hear what he came to say, so I went into the living room, where I could see the driveway from an overlooking window. Emmett followed me in. Although night had fallen, the faint moonlight glowing through the patchy clouds gave more than enough light for us to see.

Edward opened the door. The men filed out onto the front porch in time to see Jacob's car pull up. They spread out loosely at the bottom of the stairs. Jake shut off his headlights and killed the ignition.

"Hello, Jacob," Carlisle called as Jacob got out of the Rabbit. "To what do we owe the pleasure?"

I gripped the window sill and stared. It was the first time I had seen Jacob with vampire eyes. While he was still big, he seemed to have stopped growing. The same strong jaw, full lips, honest brow and animated eyes were still there, although drawn into a scowl now. But how could I have missed the almost feral cast that came from his face? He had not changed physically since his last visit, but there was nothing in him that I found attractive now. I suppose the others took no notice of this because they had always seen him this way.

"It's not good news, Doc," he said in a hard voice. "We found some fishermen."

"Fishermen?" The confusion in Carlisle's voice was flawless.

"Dead fishermen," Jacob folded his arms across his chest. "Two of Bella's friends. We think the big guy did it."

"Emmett didn't kill anybody," Edward said quietly. "What makes you think it was him?"

"We know all your scents, remember?" Jacob retorted. "We memorized all of you so we wouldn't make any mistakes when we fought the newborn army. Quil was on patrol today, and he found them. They looked like they'd been mauled by a bear and their gear was all torn up. But there were two vampire scents on them. One was his, and one we didn't recognize. Even your scents were in the area." Jacob pointed at Edward and Jasper. "If it was one of your crazy friends that did it, maybe Sam will let you slide. But the killer's got to go."

"If you already think one of us is guilty, why are you here telling us this, Jacob?" Carlisle asked.

"Because Bella is with you. The pack isn't too far behind me, and they're coming for blood. I came to get her out of here."

"I can take care of her." Edward's voice grew suddenly frosty.

Jacob shook his head. "If she's with you, she still could get mixed up in it. If she's with me, they won't touch her. Can't you do what's right for a change, bloodsucker?"

Edward's voice came in a low, deadly hiss. "Everything I've done has been for her sake. If you think for one minute I haven't tried to do what was right for Bella, you're blind as well as stupid, even for a dog. And to think I was starting to respect you for honoring her wishes!" He turned his head slightly toward Carlisle. "He's thinking if the pack kills me, it doesn't matter that we're married, and it clears the way for him! This is just another attempt to steal Bella away from me!"

"Is the pack really coming?" Carlisle asked Edward.

"He seems to think so," Edward said. "The last thing Jacob remembers Sam doing was to call the pack together after Quil told them that Emmett's scent was on the bodies."

Jacob's eyes narrowed, but he didn't start quivering. "I don't need my brothers' help to kill you. But I am thinking of Bella's safety. No matter what you say, the treaty's broken. When the pack gets here, they might not be able to stop if she's too close. I'm doing you a favor. Maybe you should get a head start, but let me get Bella out of here."

It wasn't right. I had brought this down on my family. Nobody should pay for my crimes but me. Maybe I could run down to La Push, and throw myself on Sam's mercies. If I was gone, then the pack wouldn't have any reason to attack the family. But if I was gone, Edward would… I couldn't finish the thought and sucked in several deep breaths to calm myself.

I looked down at Edward again, and his eyes were on Carlisle's face. I wondered what Carlisle was telling him. Then Edward turned toward the house. "Bella, could you come out here for a minute?" he called.

I started in surprise. What could he be up to? He was the one telling me to stay out of Jacob's sight. I glanced at Emmett and he shrugged. Mystified, I walked to the front door and opened it.

Jacob took one look at me and staggered, catching himself on the fender of his car before he could fall. His face went pale, then red, and his mouth worked like he was trying to speak but nothing was coming out.

"B…Bella?" he finally croaked.

"Hi, Jake," I said, and stepped through the doorway.

He had gone pale again. "No…no…no…you didn't…" he grated through clenched teeth.

I started down the steps toward him, walking between Edward and Carlisle. Edward laid a hand on my shoulder as I passed but didn't try to stop me. I halted a few feet from Jacob.

Now that I was closer I could see what the others meant by the smell. Where before he had smelled perfectly human to me – even attractively musky at close quarters – now I caught the odor of a very dirty, matted dog that had been out in the rain for too long. If I were human, it might make my eyes water. I fought back the urge to cover my nose with my hand.

"I'm still me, Jake." I tried to keep my voice level. "Just the outside is different."

"But you're one of them!" he agonized.

I sighed. "You knew I wanted this, Jacob. Why is it so much harder now?"

"Because that's it! You're done! You can't come back anymore!" His face showed his agony. As if I had stabbed him. As if I was holding him in a fire.

I spread my hands out, palms up. "I'm sorry, Jake, but I've wanted this ever since I first met him."

The passing breeze shifted, whiffling through my hair and into Jacob's face. His eyes widened in shock. "You killed them! That scent was you!"

The horror on his face struck me more than the accusation, and the guilt and shame rose up again. I dropped my arms, hugged them around my chest and lowered my eyes, not able to meet his gaze. It was just a matter of time before he figured that out. "Yeah, it was. Emmett had nothing to do with it; he just made it look like a bear attack."

Shock in Jacob's face shifted into anger, until it was snuffed by Jasper. "You see? I told you this was wrong! Now Sam has to kill you!"

"I know," I said, quiet and miserable. "If I hadn't wanted this so much, Mike and Jessica would still be alive. It happened so fast I didn't even recognize them until after I killed them."

Edward spoke in my defense. "She didn't know what she was doing. And she seems to be more sensitive than the rest of the family to blood. Once she caught the scent, the instinct was just too strong to resist."

"And that makes it okay?" Jacob yelled and his face contorted with rage. "You did this to her!" With that shout still echoing in the air he phased and leaped at Edward, brushing past me. Edward twisted aside, making Jacob miss, but he grimaced as the pain in his ribs flared. Jacob recovered and struck again, this time making contact. Edward flew backward and fell to the ground. Jacob closed in, jaws gaping, fangs bared.

The anger roared up instantly in me. "Stop it, Jake!" I screamed and lunged. Someone was in my way and I shoved them aside. Grabbing a hind leg with both hands, I heaved, throwing the horse-sized animal down the driveway. The wolf twisted in midair and landed, scrabbling, on his feet. With a snarl, he charged back. I jumped to meet him, but he was too fast and the giant wolf exploded into my face. Falling onto my back, the wolf's paws landed on either side of my head. It stood over me for a moment, slavering jaws open, but they held there, frozen. I didn't ask why and kicked. My foot caught the beast in the belly, throwing it over my head. I scrambled to my feet, looking around for it. The wolf lay, panting on the ground, close to the porch.

"Stop her!" someone shouted. "She'll hate herself if she kills him! Emmett!"

I heard a rush of air and something tackled me to the ground. Then something else grabbed my legs. I snarled and squirmed around, trying to get at them. But before I could work myself free, the angel's voice began speaking in my head again. And like the outgoing tide, the anger ebbed. Slowly, my vision cleared, and the roaring faded from my ears. Edward sat on the stairs, looking at me intently as he talked me down.

"Why should I stop Bella?" Jasper asked, incredulous. He was holding my legs. "Why not him?"

"He wasn't going to kill her," Edward answered, his expression equally amazed.

The russet wolf lay on his side, flanks moving as he panted. Then he got up and shook himself.

Still pinned by Emmett and Jasper, I looked back at Edward. "Edward, are you okay?" He nodded as he got up and brushed himself off. "Jake, are you okay?" I called to him.

The wolf growled, and cast a baleful eye at me.

"It's too late, my brothers are here," Edward said, translating for Jacob's thoughts. We looked up and there they were, ranged along the bank on the other side of the river. Edward's eyes sought out the gigantic black wolf. "Sam's telling Jacob to get back to the pack, he's too exposed here. He'll be dead before they can cross the river to kill us."

Jacob snarled his defiance, an ugly sound that ripped through his fangs. His tone and the surprise on Edward's face needed no translation. Sam answered in kind and the barking and snarling of the two wolves echoed off the side of the house.

"What are they saying?" Carlisle asked Edward.

"They're arguing over Bella. Jacob's refusing to help kill her. He's saying they'll have to kill him first."

"No, Jake!" I shouted. "What are you doing?"

Jacob turned his head and whuffed. "Fighting for you," Edward replied.

Suddenly, a bolt of tawny fur shot across the river and skidded to a stop by Jacob. It was Seth. He growled and barked at the rest of the pack.

"I won't help kill them either!" Edward spoke for Seth.

A horrifying snarl came from Sam. Seth and Jacob's legs folded under them, and they fell to the ground, belly and muzzle on the earth, whimpering in subservience. The command of an alpha could not be disobeyed. I glanced worriedly at Edward, who was closest to Jacob. If Jacob and Seth were about to follow orders and attack, Edward would be the first to fall.

"Edward! Get back!" I yelled.

A low growl seemed to confirm my fears, but Seth was still prostrate on the grass. Jacob's fangs were bared as he strained to raise his head, growling deep in his chest. Then slowly, painfully, legs and body quivering with the strain as if the command held him down with physical weight, he forced his haunches up. His growling grew louder as he gathered his quaking forelegs under him, and laboriously pushed his shoulders up. Only his head and tail remained hanging down, every inch of his body shaking with the effort. Then with a roar, he straightened, stood and glared at Sam, rebellion radiating from every single hair.

From where I stood, I could see Sam's eyes widen in shock. Then he voiced a string of snarls and charged across the river. Jacob's muscles bunched under his pelt and he launched himself to meet Sam's charge. Emmett picked me up and carried me back to the porch, followed by Jasper. Edward ran to join us. We should all have been running, taking advantage of the diversion Jacob had given us, but we were mesmerized by the titanic struggle taking place on the banks of the river.

The two huge wolves spun and reared on their hind legs, paws flailing, jaws wide. The ferocity I had seen when Jacob and Paul fought paled in comparison. Sam was the more powerful wolf, but Jacob was faster. At one point Sam succeeded in pushing Jacob down but Jacob squirmed free before Sam could close on him with slashing fangs. The whirling melee of fur, claws and thrashing tails made it difficult to see if either had been touched, though occasional yelps spoke of blood being drawn. The barking, growling and snarling of the two titans filled the clearing. I looked up for a moment and saw the rest of the pack was standing motionless on the other side of the river, watching. Seth stood well back from the combatants, also watching. None would interfere with a battle for supremacy.

A sudden yelp reclaimed my attention. Blood streamed from a gash on the hindquarters of the black wolf, the leg shaky under his weight. Then the russet wolf charged and the leg collapsed, the black wolf falling back. Jacob pinned the larger wolf to the ground, jaws around his throat. A muffled growl came from Jacob around his mouthful, and Sam answered with a submissive whine. Jacob released his hold, but stood growling over the vanquished former alpha. Both wolves were bleeding from slashes on legs, neck and flanks. Sam got up slowly, and limped backwards, head down, tail between his legs.

"I speak for the pack now," Edward was translating again. "Go back home and we'll talk when I get back."

Sam turned and hobbled back toward the river. Although he limped I could see that the bleeding from his wounds was slowing except for the last one. They would probably be unnoticeable by the time they got back to La Push. One by one, the other wolves withdrew into the forest.

Seth ambled up to Edward, who raised a closed fist. Seth bumped his nose to it and woofed.

"Good to see you, too," Edward said. "And thanks for sticking up for us."

Seth shook himself, almost like a human shrug, then turned to follow the rest of the pack.

"See you later."

Jacob waited until Seth disappeared from view across the river. Then he also limped into some bushes out of sight. When he returned he had phased back into human form. The bleeding from his injuries was also lessening.

"Why, Jacob?" I asked.

A weary look crossed Jacob's face. Bloody and disheveled, he looked like he might be forty right now. "I can't kill you, Bells. I hate that you chose this life. You stink and your eyes creep me out, but I still can't do it. If I can't, I'm not going to let them do it either."

"But you never wanted to be the chief," I said, marveling at what he had done for me.

The bitter, ironic mask was on his face again. "I know. Life's a bitch, isn't it?" The mask fell for a moment. "Only you could make me do this, Bella."

"I'm sorry," I said, softly. "And thank you."

"Huh, don't thank me," Jacob rumbled. "This isn't over yet. That's what Sam was thinking as they left; I shouldn't be defending a murderer. If I can't convince them to lay off, they'll be back. And if they do, then I won't be able to stop them again."

"Can't you order them not to?"

"I could, but if I can break free from the pack, maybe Sam could, since he's been alpha, too. Then all the orders in the world won't do any good." Jacob scratched his head for a moment. "You know, maybe it would be a good idea for you all to skip town for a while."

"No, Jake!" I exclaimed. "I'm the one who broke the rules. I should be the only one who has to pay, not the family."

Carlisle spoke. "At the risk of asking for favors, we do need to keep a low profile. For the whole family to leave on the heels of a mysterious death would raise suspicion. If possible, we'd like to let things die down before we leave. Once it's safe we'll go. We were planning to leave in a few years anyway."

"Yeah, but think of Charlie," Jacob said. "Bella, if you couldn't recognize your friends, would you be able to stop if you came across him when he was fishing?"

I shuddered as I considered that. The speed at which I had shifted into hunting mode had left no time for rational thought. "How about if I leave?" I proposed. "The rest of the family are still the same ones that kept the treaty with you all these years. Once I'm gone then you can convince the pack that it's still safe."

"Maybe," Jacob said dubiously.

Edward touched my shoulder. "Are you sure this is what you want?" he asked. Edward's golden eyes held no censure, only gentle concern.

I nodded. "It's the only way for the family to live in peace."

"I'll come with you, then." Before I could protest, Edward faced Jacob. "Is she allowed to return once she has control of herself?" he asked.

Jacob looked doubtful. "I guess. But she'd have to prove it somehow, in case the tribe doesn't take my word."

"That would be fair," Edward agreed.

Jacob turned back to me. "So, what are you going to tell Charlie?"

I grimaced. "I don't know yet. I would have had a few years away at school. I should be able to come up with something."

Jacob grunted and shook his head in disapproval. "Anyway, I better get going. I'll need to tell them what's going on."

"Thank you, Jacob." Carlisle raised his right hand in gratitude.

"I didn't do it for you," Jacob growled. He sighed and turned a sad face to me. "Bye, Bells. It's been fun."

I was going to go into exile, and didn't know if I would ever see him again. My first impulse was to hug him goodbye, but I held back. For one thing, Edward was standing right next to me. And now that I stank to Jacob, he wouldn't like that very much. I asked him a different question. "Were you really going to take me away?" I asked.

His lips twisted at the thought. "Yeah, well, it doesn't matter anymore." He looked into my eyes. It seemed the depths of pain in his eyes went on forever. "Hope you're happy, Bella."

At this moment, I wasn't sure how to answer that. But the best I could do was to wish him well. "Hope you'll be happy, too."

"Sure, sure." He unwillingly slid his eyes away from me, turned and got stiffly into his Rabbit.

"Bye, Jake." I waved.

He didn't answer, and gazed at me through the windshield as he started the car. The look on his face brought back the yearning to comfort him, to erase the haunted pain in his eyes. But now that I was beyond his reach, that was something I could never do again. I was only vaguely aware of Edward's comforting arms around me as I watched Jacob drive away.

To be continued...

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