Sorry for any grammar/spelling mistakes!
First off, I am sorry, this is really short and late, but I had to get something up for you guys!
Disclaimer: All Mortal Instrument characters are owned by Casandra Clare, I just own the plot and the twins
Chapter 11- The Beginning of a Deep Confession
The sun light casting through Maia's windows was fading fast into night while Clary sat on the couch gazing out onto the city, flipping her phone back and forth between each hand. The T.V. was turned to a random channel but Clary wasn't paying attention to the program, she was too lost in memories and thoughts jumbled around in her head. She traced the edge of the skyline, the ups and downs of the skyscrapers and buildings, memorizing the casted shadows as they shifted positions and ultimately took over the whole city. She then focused on the clear night sky, squinting to see if by some magic, stars would appear in her vision, where she could count the little dots and draw lines to each, where she could imagine a mental picture to herself of vivid creations. Where she could place herself back in time with her friends and family, all laid out on the grass at Luke's farm house, she could still recall the wind as it blew over them, the silky grassland underneath her fingertips and the way it tickled the backside of her neck. She could even remember the warm soft breath whispering in her ear, "Beautiful."
"I know right!" She exclaimed, still pointing up to the sky. Turning her head, smiling to the boy that lay by her side. The sound of the others talking and discussing shapes quickly disappeared when her eyes locked with gold. He wasn't looking up at the sky but studying her face instead with a look of adoration and deep affection. Making her heart stop and breath catch, he just smiled bright and shyly in response, showing a hint of his chipped incisor, sparks lighting up his eyes in a way she had never seen before.
"Honey, I'm home!"
The sound of a door slamming in the distance shattered her memory, bringing her back into reality. Soon Maia emerged from behind the hallway walls, bearing gifts.
"Here are some more clothes," Maia lifted the bag she held in her right hand, dropping it by the side table. "I'm going to start dinner; did you have any preferences?"
Clary was still looking out the wide window, shaking her head no in response.
"Okay…" Maia said quietly, she observed Clary for a few more seconds, she noticed the phone she twirled in her hands. Bringing forth her knowledge that Clary missed her children, how much pain it brought her to be separated from them, even if it was just a week. Let alone all the things that came to the surface Clary had building up, she sensed that the girl was holding back her feelings and assembled that notorious wall of hers. It was only Wednesday, they had two more days to go and she hoped that her friend would be able to make it that long, even with out a shoulder to lean on if that's what she choice for herself.
Turning away and heading to the small kitchen, Maia started to prepare what ever scrapes she had in her dingy fridge.
Once she was done, two bowls of rice and baked potatoes later she walked into the living room. Clary was still positioned in the end of the couch. The only sign of movement in the room since Maia had been in the kitchen was the glow of the Christmas lights, draping around the window. She walked to set Clary's portion on the table beside her.
"I haven't plugged those in, in ages." Maia remarked, trying to get some type of reaction from Clary.
The other girl just sat there, still staring out of the window.
About to give up, Maia sat down on the other end of the couch. Picking up the television remote and flickering through the channel, chowing down on her food. The room set into a quite atmosphere, with the only sound coming from the television. When Clary finally did respond, Maia jumped a little in shock.
"They remind me of stars." Was all she said, eyes locked on the window. Maia just looked at Clary in confusion, starting to wonder if all this stress the girl was going through had finally made her go insane. As if sensing Maia's turmoil, Clary elaborated. "The lights…"
Clary finally directed her eyes away from the window to look at Maia. Pointing to the lights that hung over the open curtains. "There reflection off the window… it makes it look like you can see stars in the sky…" turning her head back to the window. Maia just stared at the back of Clary's head puzzled. Then she rose her gaze to look out through the window as well, letting her eyes drift along the skyline. At the edge of her vision small flicks of light bounced off the surface of the glass, indeed giving the illusion of a sparkling twilight.
"I remember the first time I took the twins to Luke's farm house…," a small half chuckle emerged through Clary's lips, "Sophia didn't want to go back inside, I think we stayed out there on the grass just staring at the sky till dawn." Flashes of memories of the three of them came to the forefront of Clary's mind. "They both had the worst mosquito bites for an entire week after that."
"Oh, I bet Jocelyn gave you a tone of crap for that!"
"You have no idea!" Clary replied, looking back at Maia with a smile. A sad look formed on her face a second later. "But…" Maia reached out to put a hand on her leg in reassurance. "I think I cried the first two days every time one of them scratched themselves to hard and drew blood." She raised her hand to cover her eyes in embarrassment while Maia just laughed at her reaction.
"That's because they are your babies," Maia soothed to her. Clary just laughed at herself, lowering her hand down to rest in her lap once again. Looking to meet Maia's eyes, Clary studied them questioningly for longer than would be necessary. She searched her eyes for some type of reassurance, what reflected back was understanding.
Opening her mouth about to speak but stopping herself, Clary dropped her eyes back down to the phone in her hands before whispering her fears to Maia. "I… I don't know what I'm doing Maia."
Maia scooted closer to Clary on the couch, setting her hand on her shoulder. "What do you mean?"
The reaction Clary gave from those two words was not one that Maia expected. Clary jumped up from the couch arms stretched out. "This! Everything!" Breathing out heavily she continued, "What if this is all wrong, everything that I have ever done was just wrong?"
Maia stared at Clary as she began to pace opposite of the couch, one hand resting on her forehead. Reaching out for the remote to mute the TV, Maia tried to focus on the girl in the center of the living room.
"Clary,"
Stopping in front of the glass that separated herself from the outside world, Clary took a deep breath in, "Everything," she whispered, "everything that I have done Maia was for the sake of those two kids."
Rising from her spot on the sofa to stand next to her friend, Maia observed her for a moment, wanting to utter words of comfort to Clary. She knew that there were things that Clary hadn't told her, things that where probably breaking the young girl from the inside out. Maia, not wanting to push Clary over her comfort zone, felt the need to state what needed to be said. She knew the girl was hurting and the only people that knew her situation completely, Clary was being forced to keep them at a distance for there own protection and her children's. Before Maia could get anything out, Clary had turned around, continuing her rant.
"Since the day, the moment that I found out that it wasn't just me anymore, that I was carrying another life-", a heavy crack in her voice echoed throughout the apartment, sending a shiver through Maia. "I am a good mother Maia!"
"I know you are Clary." Maia lulled, taking a small step forward. "I see it day to day."
"Then why do I feel like I have failed them?" She cried out, tears starting to fall down her face making Maia rush forward, gathering the small red head in her arms. Sobs so heavy that Maia could feel the hiccups of Clary's sobs vibrate through her chest.
"Hey-hey, you haven't failed anyone Clary."
"I was scared… I was so scared." Clary gushed out in to Maia's shoulder.
Anger started to boil in the pit of Maia's stomach, why was she scared? Was she scared of how the father would react? Did he hurt her? More questioning and thoughts ran wild in Maia's mind as her friend cried in her arms, waiting for her to steady her breath.
"When I heard the first shots- I- I didn't know…"
Shots? What shots? Maia thought, feeling Clary's body tense up even more than it already was, Maia hurried to calm her. "Hey, you don't have to explain anything Clary, your safe here. No one is going to hurt you here, I promise." She could hear the harsh breaths Clary inhaled, finally settling her self down a bit.
"I loved him, but it was to much. You have no idea what it felt like to just stand back, waiting and waiting to find out if everyone you knew and loved was okay… I never wanted to feel that way again, never. It wasn't just me anymore."
Maia slowly moved them back on the couch, waiting for Clary to elaborate more, running her hand down her back in soothing tempos.
"How about you just get some rest and we can talk about it in the morning." Maia spoke through the quite room. Feeling Clary node in approval, Maia stayed there on the couch with her until she fell into a slumber.
She sat there thinking about the long list of questions that had computed into her brain. When morning came Clary had some deep explain to do.
Again I am sorry, holidays have been crazy and so has school… I have just been so busy and when I'm not busy I just sleep because I'm so exhausted, this semester needs to end, and Christmas needs to get her faster!
Hopefully I can get another quick chapter out maybe by Friday? I'll work really hard to, I promise!
But, what did you like best?
Who is your fav, and who do you hate?
What's up with Clary, and what do you think she is going on about?
What are you dying to find out?
Did you like the flash back?
What would you like to see?
Whose ready to see Jace again?
Help me with some motivation, I love hearing from you guys!
Tell me your theories and I'll answer one of your need to know questions/spoiler in the story!
Sorry if you reviewed last time and didn't get a response from me, I was supper supper busy the last 2 weeks but I will be responding to all this time ASAP!
All the love,
~BabyBritt