Disclaimer: I do not own the turtles and I am making no money off this story.

Okay, here is another chapter, sorry it took so long but I got a bit distracted. I am going to try and get two more parts up this weekend to make up for my slacking. In this chapter I don't know if I am all that happy with Raph, he seems a little off but I am not sure why. I wanted to portray the shift in his character but I don't know if I am all that happy with the results…oh well.

As always, if you have any comments or suggestions on my writing please let me know in a review. Comments are always desired and appreciated. I wanted to give a big thank you to Alora05 and Polly for your continual reviews. (-; You both keep me inspired and I appreciate your input!! Anyway, on with the story…

Chapter 11

A Life Broken A Life Saved

Raphael was alone for the first time in days. It was a miracle that he was able to shoo off both an obsessive little brother as well as his over protective older brother. Part of him enjoyed their company but there was another side that just wanted a little peace and quiet. Mikey had been the one who really noticed that he needed the time to himself and had dragged Leo out of the infirmary. It was a relief; Leo had turned into some insane mother hen that watched everything that he did to make sure he didn't push himself too hard during his recovery. Raph understood his brothers concern but if he didn't get a break from Leo he was going to snap.

After his brothers had left he had headed out himself, asking one of the nurses for the best escape rout which they smiled and pointed to a far set of stairs. He was sick of looking at blank white walls and he itched for a soft breeze or the warm touch of the sun on his neglected skin. Anything would be better than that room. This of course led to his currant position. He now stood alone on the roof of the building. The freedom did wonders for his spirit and he felt as if a large weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He almost felt giddy, not that he would let his brothers ever see it but it was a relief to feel so free and it didn't all have to do with that white room. For the first time in over a year Raphael felt more like his old self.

With a deep breath he brought his hands together in front of him, slowly stretching his leg out in a kick. What he really wanted was to hit his punching bag but there was none to be had. So instead he had settled for doing some simple katas. The wound in his side was almost healed but he could still feel a deep pain where he had been stabbed when he moved too fast. The healer had told him to take it easy; his body would tell him when it was healed completely.

Leonardo was bound and determined to keep Raphael in bed which of course was a battle Leo was quickly losing. He needed to move, needed to keep pushing himself. Raphael wasn't a fool; he knew when he pushed himself too far but he understood that Leo's obsession with him was not completely due to his injuries. His brother was desperate. He was in a constant need to have something to do. Something to focus on that he could control so that he didn't drive himself crazy thinking about the things that he couldn't control. However, Leo was driving everyone else crazy in the process.

Raph shook his head to clear it. He was supposed to be focused on his exercise but it seemed that while his body enjoyed the simple act of moving, his mind was focused on nothing and everything at the same time. If Master Splinter had been there Raphael knew that he would have felt the bite of his cane by now. Thinking of Splinter did make him smile, he remembered his dream. Well, to some extent he remembered it. More like he remembered the feeling he had, the warmth of his Father's words, the encompassing love of his presence. He no longer could recall the exact words that had been said just the meaning behind them. It was really hard to describe.

Raphael wanted to tell his brothers about his journey back but he wasn't ready. Perhaps he was being a bit selfish but he wanted to hold his father close to him for a little longer. That and he felt he needed the time to sort through his own feelings. The day that Splinter died was still fresh in his mind, the expanse of time sense his death doing nothing to dull it, but the sharp edges about the memory seemed smoother. They didn't cut him so deeply when he reached out for it. Not like it had once done. The memory had been so painful to look upon that he had found himself avoiding it all together. Now it was different, it still hurt but he could now look upon the memory and see the life lessons and love that Splinter had left behind for all of them. Splinter had always been the dedicated Father to them all and he shuddered to think what their lives would have been without him.

He had been so angry. A part of him was even mad at Splinter for dying as illogical as that sounded. They had all been there that night as the old rat drifted off in his sleep. It was so quiet and so quick that the brothers had simply looked to one another none wanting to believe the old rat was gone. Splinter hadn't even really been that sick, just weak and old. Leo kept checking for a pulse even after he knew there wasn't one but he couldn't stop. Donatello was the one who finally had to pull Leo away, whispering that he was gone, nothing more any of them could do.

Mikey was the one who stepped forward placing a shaking hand on Splinter's cooling forehead. With his other hand he pulled the old tattered sheet up and over their Masters body. As he let go and the sheet drifted down framing Splinter's body and at that dreadful moment Raphael had felt something break inside of him. Like the concrete wall of a dam, he felt the structure of his life cracking from its very foundation. Confusion, fear, anger all seeped from him but as the crack grew in size so did his lack of control over his feelings.

He roared, he remembered that but not much else. For the first time that he could remember no one tried to calm him down. No one said anything to him. Leo's face was ashen, Donatello was blank and Mikey still sat by Splinter, hands still gripped the old sheet. Raphael had left and headed for the streets, grabbing his bike he roared off into the night without helmet or disguise. He simply didn't care anymore and he turned to speed for some kind of relief. Whipping down the streets of New York like a red blur Raphael refused to stop. Pushing the bike to top speeds he was relentless. At the time he had felt that somehow, if he could just go fast enough, get enough speed he could out run his life. Out run the pain and confusion that was chasing after him like some dark hungry demon. There were a number of times he felt the bike slip and he was barely able to keep control. Looking back now Raph wondered if some force had been watching out for him that night, protecting and guiding him when he was incapable of doing so for himself.

Raph stayed away from his brothers for almost a week. He came back finally to help bury their father but he wasn't the same. None of them were. Raphael went through the motions of living but really he wasn't, he was still on that bike running away from something he would never be able to escape from. He had been running and would still be running if he hadn't been forced to make a choice. Raphael had a new lease on life and he would be damned if he was going to waste it.

With a final sweeping motion Raphael ended his kata and exhaled softly. The tight feeling in his muscles was gone and he felt refreshed again. It was a beautiful day, the sun shone above him warming his skin and he moved to the ledge of the building looking out on the expanse of greenery. That was the only thing his city didn't have enough of, wide open spaces. Not that he would ever be willing to give up his city for open masses of land, but he could still appreciate it when he saw it.

There was only one shadow that loomed over him still and that was Donatello. The sight of Karai over his brother was enough to bring back the bitter after taste of his anger. He tried to control it to the best of his abilities. Neither Leo nor Mikey brought up Donnie. That isn't to say that he wasn't constantly on their minds it was just that they all knew there was nothing to be done. Nothing they could do, they were completely at the mercy of the Domio and his war staff. So they tried to keep themselves preoccupied but each day was a new challenge and Raph didn't know just how much longer he would be able to keep his cool.

Raphael had always made it his duty to watch out for Donnie. His brother was intelligent but preoccupied most of the time. That and Don was a shity fighter. Out of all of them he hated to cause permanent damage to anyone in a fight, even if they were trying to kill him. Raph had lost count of just how many times he had to bale out his brother, but this time he wasn't fast enough.

A feeling of guilt sliced through him, he should have been faster, stronger, but he wasn't and now Donnie was lost. There was a dark voice at the edge of his consciousness that tried to lure him towards it. It wanted him to feel his guilt and wallow in it. The voice wanted him to pull his weapons out and kill the first thing that crossed his path in a blind and violent rage. He knew that voice; it was the voice that had taken control of him the night his father died.

With a shake of his head he pushed the voice away from him. Raphael had vowed never again to allow that darker side of him free rein. Donatello was a capable fighter, he would be fine. Raph had to have faith in his brother's abilities.

Raph was pulled out of his reprieve by the sight of his two brothers running towards the infirmary. A slight frown played upon his brows as he watched them from his vantage point. Something was going on. He could tell by the way they were moving. Raphael pushed himself away from the ledge he had been leaning on and started down the stairs to meet Leonardo and Michelangelo.

He opened the door to the main entrance hall just as he seen Leo disappear into the room Raph had been placed for his recovery. Before his brothers could shout his name which he knew was coming, Raph called out to them first.

"What's up guys?" his voice was calm but the concern was evident in his eyes as he looked to both Mikey and Leo.

"Raph!" Mikey lunged himself at Raphael catching him momentarily off guard and wrapping an arm around his neck. Before Raph could say or do anything though Mikey had pulled away again, his face radiating excitement. "He found him!"

"What?" was Raph's somewhat unintelligent remark.

"It is the Domio." Leo said, a bit more subdued than Mikey but he was obviously excited as well. "We just came back from his thrown room and he said that he has found Donnie. He is back in New York."

Raph could feel his heart swell in his own chest. Mikey's enthusiasm was infectious. "Well! Then what are we standing around here for! Lets go!"

Leo reached out and grabbed his arm. "Hey, are you sure you are okay Raph?"

With a quick jerk he pulled his arm away from his brother. "Damn it Leo, I am fine and if you ask me that again then I am going to punch you into next week!" He had said it with a growl but the faint smile gave him away.

His brother raised his arms in surrender with a small smile of his own. "Alright! Good to know that your personality didn't get wounded."

"Would you two shut up and come on!" Mikey's voice came from out in the hall.

"What do ya think Fearless? Shall we go and get our brother back?"

"Lets."

They left at a jog, the movement liberating for all of them. There was purpose in their steps as they moved towards the Domio's home. The brothers didn't even have to climb the steps as they were greeted by the Domio and his aid.

"Domio, we want to thank you for all that you have done for us." All three of them followed Leonardo's lead and bowed to the aged man before them.

"Leonardo, son of Splinter, you are most welcomed. Travel well and be safe."

The Domio raised his mighty war staff and the brothers were incased in light and water. The world began to shift and dim as they slipped through the once solid ground. There was a moment of confusion and vertigo as a new world began to take shape about them. As the light dimmed and the bubble disappeared the familiar shapes and sounds of their city came back to them.

"We are close to the old lair, why would Donnie be here?" Leo was more thinking aloud more than anything else as he looked about himself at their surroundings.

There was a soft moan that could be heard coming from the old abandoned garage and Raph and Leo both moved forward at the same time followed closely by Mikey. As they entered the battered building they saw their lost brother tending the wounds on a much smaller figure that was laid out on an old work bench. Raphael recognized the figure and it took every ounce of his restraint to keep himself from lunging forward.

"Donatello!" Raphael all but roared his brother's name as he moved towards him. "What the hell do you think you are doing!?"

Raphael lifted his brother up with a bit more force than he had initially intended and he felt bad when he saw the obvious pain that it caused Donnie. He loosened his grip but didn't let go as he tried to soften his voice somewhat and repeated the question.

"What do you think you are doing? That bitch tried to kill you and here you are trying to patch her up? That bleeding heart of yours is going to get us all into trouble."

"Raph," Donnie started and then stopped. How and where should he begin his story? He was so exhausted by this point he was having a hard time staying focused on anything. "She said she was sorry."

At that Raph's jaw dropped. "She said she was sorry so you thought you would patch her up for fun?"

"No! I mean yes…I mean…" Donnie finally gave up. He wasn't going to try and explain himself to his brother, perhaps latter but not now. With a long suffering sigh Donnie let himself lean forward slightly against his brother. If Raph were to move then Donnie would fall. Raphael noticed the shift in weight and looked at his brother in concern. The anger he felt a moment before was gone.

"Donnie, bro, you okay?" He gently pushed back on Don's shoulder and noticed the open wound and cursed himself. Once again he had jumped without looking; he hadn't even seen the two wounds on Donnie. He probed them both gently causing the turtle leaning against him to hiss softly in pain. Neither looked too bad, they defiantly needed to be cleaned but otherwise they looked as if they had already made an attempt to heal.

Leonardo watched his brothers for a moment before he walked over closer to Karai. The woman was a battered mess with barely recognizable features. She was mumbling something and Leo leaned in closer as he could have sworn she had called his name.

"Leonardo, I am sorry, sorry, so very sorry. Please do not leave me…"

"I haven't left you Karai," he said as he placed a hand on her burning forehead. For a moment her eyes opened and they seemed to focus on him.

"No, you are just a dream." Her eyes closed again and her words lost their coherency again as she fell into fever. He had never seen anyone so broken as Karai was at that moment and it broke his heart.

"Leo!" It was Raph calling to him and he turned only slightly to show that he was listening. "Come on Leo, lets go."

"We can't just leave her Raph!" at least he couldn't. He knew that he should but… "We could take her with us." Even as it was out of his mouth he knew it was a stupid thing to say.

"You have got to be kidding me. Mikey, take Donnie for a sec." Leo heard some shuffling behind him and then Raph was beside him. "You and me, we are gonna have a little talk outside."

Leo looked up but didn't say anything following his brother out the door and across the street to a secluded alley way. When Raph turned to face him his expression unsettled him. Leonardo had never been afraid of his brother but something in his eyes made him hesitate just slightly.

"Leo, I know you don't mean what you just said. I know that you ain't that stupid. That you would put us all at risk just because in a delirious moment Karai apologized to you and Donnie."

Raph's voice came out in a low growl that gave Leo pause. The anger in Raphael was obvious, there was a slight shake in his hands and his body was radiating negative energy so much that it was almost tangible. Yet, he was controlling himself. Leo could see the lion behind his brother's eyes but it had been locked behind iron bars. This control that his brother had displayed was what made Leo actually listen to him so intently. He suddenly felt ashamed for even mentioning taking Karai to their home. It had been a stupid and rash thing to even suggest.

Raphael recognized the pain on Leo's face as he looked down, breaking eye contact.

"Look Leo, I say we call an ambulance. She will be safer going to a hospital than to go to the lair in an underground sewer."

"Your right, I just…" How could he describe what he was feeling?

"You just want to be the one to save her." At that Raph place a hand on Leo's shoulder. "Look, not everyone can be or even wants to be saved."

Leo didn't say anything to that and just silently watched as Raph pulled out his phone dialing for help as he walked across the way to get their brothers. In a matter of moments he was back supporting a very weak Donatello.

Together all four stood in the alley watching as paramedics pulled up in a flurry of sound and movement. Before Leo could count to ten the men in white came out of the old garage bearing precious cargo. Just like that they were gone again and the world fell quiet once more.

Leo looked over to his brothers. Donatello looked beyond exhausted and was now being completely supported by Raph. Mikey looked like he was just ready to go home. Raphael and Leonardo met each others gaze, talking without saying a word. Raph broke away first as he bent down slightly and picked up Donatello who started to complained but quickly gave up with one firm frown from his older brother.

"Go on Leo. I'll take care of Donnie." Leo hesitated but when Raph nodded his head again he took the opportunity that was offered him. He didn't have to be the leader right now; Raph would take care of everything.

Leo gave his brother a small bow before he started out for the nearest roof top to chase after the ambulance. There was only one hospital in the area so he knew where he was headed even if he lost sight of the white vehicle as it roared down the streets.

That had been a few hours past, a few hours that he had left his brothers in that alley way and Leo still waited. He had found Karai's room rather easily after she had finally been assigned one after what he was sure was surgery; sometimes it really paid to be a ninja. A number of doctors and nurses hovered about the bed hooking up a number of machines and talking amongst themselves but everything was finally beginning to wind down some and the number of bodies in the small room were decreasing.

At long last the last nurse stepped out of the room turning down the lights and shutting the door behind her. Leo needed no more encouragement than that and he slipped through the open window. As he approached the bed he had to stifle a small gasp. Now that all the blood had been washed away Karai's multiple wounds were far more apparent. In all his years in battle he had not seen a warrior look so beaten both in body and in spirit. He placed one hand on her forehead and she unconsciously leaned into the slight touch which brought a tight smile to his lips.

"What has happened to you Karai?" Leo pulled away from her and even in sleep she tried to reach out to him but he moved to the foot of the bed. He pulled out the medical chart that the doctors had been looking over moments prior to their departure. He started to flip through it not really knowing what he was looking at but doing his best to make it out. Broken arm, ribs and a fractured skull as well as a number of other wounds had left Karai in critical condition.

With a sigh he put the chart away. He was angry at whoever had done this to her but then another part was telling him that she would have done the same to him given the opportunity. Yet, a still larger part of him didn't want to believe that either. He placed his hand over hers as he stared at the wall, not really seeing anything but replaying all the times he had met Karai in battle.

"Karai," Leo whispered her name and turned to look at the beaten and swollen face. "Whenever I am around you I am weak. I don't think clear I just…want to see the best in you."

What was he doing? It wasn't like she could hear him. He turned to leave, Raph was right, he needed to get his act together and stop allowing Karai to distract him.

"Leo," her voice was quite and weak but he heard it all the same. Their eyes met and he couldn't break the connection even if he wanted to. One shaky hand lifted towards him. "Please don't go just yet."

That was all it took and he was beside her once more.

"Am I dreaming?" her small voice asked.

The question took Leo off guard. "No you're not Karai."

"Good." Her eyes closed again and he thought that perhaps she had drifted off into sleep but Leo realized that she hadn't when her eyes fixed on his face once more.

"I want to say I am sorry Leonardo." He went to say something but she cut him off with a slight squeeze on his hand. "No, please hear me out. I wanted to bring back my father but I learned a lot a bout him and you were right. You were always right. I was just too blind to see it. I didn't want to see it." She closed her eyes again. It was obvious that she was in a lot of pain. "He would have killed me. That is how much I really meant to him."

"Karai, look, you didn't want to see his faults because he was your father."

"No Leo listen, because of him I was willing to end the life of a child. I became the monster that he was. I can't do that, I will never do that." The grip on Leo's hand was slipping as she was losing her grip on the waking world. "I am sorry Leonardo, for everything…"

"Your Father did all of this to you?" he really wasn't surprised but it still angered him that Karai was almost killed by the one person who mattered the most to her. It was the ultimate betrayal.

Her hand slipped from his and he felt a momentary panic and reached for her pulse but she was fine, only sleeping again.

"Karai sleep well and know that I forgive you. This is your chance to make things right. This is your opportunity to take back the honor you have lost." With that he leaned forward and placed a ghost of a kiss on her forehead.

"But what if I fall?" was the faint whisper that teased his ears. He answered without hesitation or thought and he knew that he meant it.

"Then I will catch you." His words reached her and he could see her body fall deeper into a healing sleep.

Leonardo turned to the window to leave. He paused half in and half out, chancing a glance back to the sleeping form. A small smile played on his features.

"I will always be here to catch you Karai, whether you want me to or not."

As fast as he had entered the room he was gone again without a trace, his presence nothing more but a fading memory to a battered warrior.

Well, I now only have three more bits to go before the end of this story, kind of sad really. The next part will be 'The Road Less Traveled,' which will feature Raphael once more as he is faced with another difficult choice.