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Brooklyn, New York
Bucky opened the mailbox outside of his apartment, it had been a few days since he had heard from Béatrice and he silently hoped today would be the day he would get another letter. He made good on his promise to write to her often. Every night he would lay in bed for about an hour, with sleep never taking him. Eventually, he would force himself out of bed and pen another letter to her.
To some it may have seemed silly and desperate, but to him it was the only thing keeping him sane with all the random dates he was going on. It also felt like they only way to keep her as close to him as possible.
He dug into the mailbox and pulled out a single envelope addressed to him. He flipped it over and sure enough a rabbit was drawn on the back of it. It was from her; his wish had come true.
Tearing it open with a wide smile on his face, he began to read it.
Dear Bucky,
By the time you get this, I'll probably be long gone. We're headed back to London before we go to Norway, so it might take a little longer to receive your letters and to respond, but don't fear. I promise you, I will respond to each and every one. Know that you're on my mind often and I hope you're well.
I'm sorry to hear that your date didn't go well. To be frank, she sounded dreadful. I think you're smart by not going on a second date with her. You can do much better than someone like her. I'm sure you'll be able to find someone nice enough to date before you get your orders. You're a very charming and wonderful person to be around, so I don't see why it would be a problem. You are a ladies man after all.
I'm a little nervous about returning to Europe I must admit. I'm unsure of how to feel about this mission to Norway. It's a bit out of the ordinary for me. There are others far more qualified for a mission such as this, but instead they are sending Alexander and I. I just wish they were sending me home instead. One day perhaps.
I'm sorry this letter may seem short, but I only had a few minutes to write it before we left. I miss you and I can't wait to hear from you.
Béatrice
P.S. And before you ask, of course I'll stay safe. I'll make sure to always stay safe for you.
He felt a number of things as he finished the letter. First and foremost was sadness. She was on her way back to Europe and the fact that she was no longer in the country tugged at his heartstrings greatly. She was now even further away, from him.
The second thing he felt was worry. Bucky knew she wouldn't want him to worry about her, but he couldn't help it. What she did was dangerous and while he was immensely proud of how much courage she had to be a spy, there would always be a part of him that would wonder if this was the mission where something would go wrong. The fact that they were sending her on a mission she was not used to doing deeply concerned him. He wondered what she would be doing and why her superiors felt the need to send her and McPherson as opposed to someone else. He silently prayed that she would be okay. At least she had old grumpy pants with her and Bucky knew he'd do anything to protect her.
The last thing he felt was a small shred of happiness. She missed him and had been thinking about him often. Above all else that is what he took away from the letter. She was thinking about him just like he was thinking about her, that's what did it. It gave him hope that maybe things would work out between them after all. It was a small chance, but he was not willing to let it go.
S.S.R. Headquarters London, England
"Captain McPherson, Agent Faust, welcome back" an agent spoke to the pair as they walked down the hallway.
She was finally back in Europe, well…London at least. It wasn't as close to home as what Béatrice wanted, but then again it was better than being stuck doing nothing for weeks on end.
As she and Alexander walked to the main operations room, her mind drifted to Evelyn. The redhead had not been happy to say goodbye to either of them. There was a moment where she even thought that Evelyn wouldn't let go of her or Alexander when she hugged them goodbye. She was determined to keep those closest to her near. Her eyes had said it all. She was sad, angry, and frustrated, but there was always a price to pay in war, it was the cost for the possibility of peace.
It was a price that Béatrice hoped many of them would not have to continue to pay.
She and Alexander walked to her desk, discussing some last minute preparations for their trip to Norway. They still had not been told much. Only that they were supposed go to the local church in Tønsberg and talk to the church keeper. From there, the information did not exist. The lack of information continued to make her nervous.
Walking over to her desk, the two stopped, noticing a pile of letters on top of it. "Jeez, you have a lot of mail" the blonde commented.
Béatrice frowned at the small pile on her desk. They couldn't all be from her father could they? Surely someone would have alerted her to it. However, picking up the envelopes she looked at them. Her heart stopped, "They're all from Bucky" she looked up at him, smiling.
"Three letters?" Alexander looked at her desk in disbelief. "Does he not have a life outside of writing to you now?"
The brunette only shrugged at him and sat down, laughing. "I told him to live his life. I can't help that he's not doing what I said. I have no control over him." She then shot him a smirk as she began to look at the files that were on her desk.
Her friend picked up the envelopes and looked at them closer. "Oh I would argue you have more control over him than you think. Can I read them?"
Béatrice glared at him and snatched the letters from his possession. "Absolutely not" she huffed. "They're not addressed to you."
"But you let Evelyn read them" Alexander protested, pouting.
She raised an eyebrow at him. "Well we both know how difficult it is to say no to Evelyn."
"Touché" he nodded his head in agreement. "I'm going to check on the preparations for us leaving tomorrow. Do you need anything?"
"No" she shook her head. "Thank you though. I'll be here if you need anything."
"Enjoy your letters from your boyfriend" he shot her a smirk before turning to leave.
"Not my boyfriend" she called out and rolled her eyes. She sighed and sat back in her seat, mulling over Alexander's words. She had no control over Bucky. There was no way. He was just writing to her like she had asked.
She opened a drawer and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. Pulling one out, she lit it with a nearby match from a box also on her desk. The letters seemed as though they were yelling at her to be opened. She was anxious to do so. She was curious as to why Bucky had written her so much. She had expected him to write when she had, but she didn't realize he would be writing her even when he had yet to receive a letter. She had only sent him two and now he had sent her four.
Reaching over, she grabbed one that had been post marked first.
Dear Béatrice,
I hope you're well. I still haven't received a letter from you. I guess the military mail is slow or something. Or is it? I'm not complaining, I'm just looking forward to hearing from you that's all.
I hope you're having fun in D.C. There's a lot to do there, so I'm sure you're keeping busy. But I'm sure you're anxious to get back to Europe. I'm feeling somewhat anxious myself to get over there. They said it would be a few weeks before I got orders, but I'm hoping I'll get them sooner rather than later.
Steve and I have been spending time together. He tried to enlist again. His new thing is to start using false names and addresses. He's really desperate to be in the Army and serve his country. I admire him for the resilience, but I'm worried it's only going to end in disappointment for him. I'm worried what's going to happen to him once I get my orders. Since his mom died, I've been the one looking out for him and if I'm gone, he'll have no one.
I went on another date last night. You're probably rolling your eyes as you read that. I continue to live up to your original interpretation of me. This one was a lot better than the one before, but still not great. Her name was Emily. She was a blonde, which I should have taken as the first negative sign. She was nice, but a little too timid and quiet. Not that it was a bad thing, but she unexpectedly brought a friend with her. Which meant that I had to drag Steve along with me for her friend. He wasn't pleased. Her friend really wasn't a fan of Steve and wouldn't even dance with him. I was able to get more out of Emily finally when I took her dancing, but all she did was complain about her ex-boyfriend. After that I couldn't get her to shut up about him. I don't think I'll be taking her out again either.
I seem to be having terrible luck since I got back to Brooklyn with dating. Maybe that's on account of you though. No one's as interesting at you are. I hope you're well. Tell old grumpy pants to keep you safe or I'll come and kick his ass when I'm over there.
Bucky
Béatrice let out a laugh as she finished the letter. Bucky was right, he was having terrible luck with it came to dating. Perhaps he needed to lower his expectations then. She'd be sure to tell him that when she responded. She picked up the second letter and opened it to read it too.
Dear Béatrice,
I still haven't gotten a letter from you yet, but I expect I should get one from you shortly. It has only been two days since I last saw you though. Two days too many if you ask me.
I hope you don't get annoyed with all the letters I'm sending you. I haven't been sleeping much since I got back to Brooklyn and the only thing I find myself doing is writing to you. If you're annoyed, I'm sorry, but something tells me that you won't be angry.
I went on another date last night. It actually started out nice. Her name was Carolyn. She was a secretary and we had a nice conversation. She appreciated the fact that I wanted to serve in the military and found it very brave. We went dancing. That was a mistake. It turned out her boyfriend hadn't been paying much attention to her and she wanted to get back at him. It just so happened that her boyfriend was also the bartender at the club we went to. I barely made it out of there before getting punched.
I think under other circumstances I would have been angry, but instead I was relived. Maybe I should just swear off dating for a bit. What do you think?
Hope D.C. is well and that you're getting along with Evelyn. I can't imagine why you wouldn't. Sure you were infuriating to me and stubborn when we first met, but that was completely different. You're not a hard person to get along with. Easy to like too. Really easy.
Miss you.
Bucky
She shook her head once she was done and picked up the final letter.
Dear Béatrice,
I finally received a letter from you today. Took you long enough.
I'm happy to hear you're having fun and getting along with Evelyn. She sounds like quite a dame. How did old grumpy pants manage to get someone like her? She sounds like the complete opposite of him. What's their secret? Find out and let me know. She must see something I don't, but she did say she liked me, so she must have good taste in men. I look forward to meeting her in the future.
Norway? That doesn't sound like a typical mission for you at all. Why are they sending you? Can't someone else go in your place? Have they even told you what you're supposed to be
looking for? What could possibly be in Norway that Hitler would want? You've got me worried now too. Just do me a favor, please be careful and write to me as soon as you get back so I don't go out of my mind. I really don't like this at all. However, I know whatever they are making you do, you can handle it. You're strong.
I am sorry though that they aren't sending you back to where you want to. I know you're probably frustrated about not being able to get your family out and about the lack of information regarding Rifka. Keep faith though. There's always hope that tomorrow could be the day where you're sent back to Germany or you get the news that you seek. Everything will be alright. One day all of this will just be a distant memory. With us coming into the war, a lot of people say it won't last much longer. Let's hope everyone is right. Know I'm here for you whenever you need it.
I know I keep saying this, but I really do miss you. I wish I could see you as well. Steve thinks something is off with me because I don't seem interested in dates and according to him I've been different since I got back from training. I think I owe that to you. You really changed my perspective on life. Opened my eyes to a world that was really just staring in front of me. God, I miss you so much.
Be safe when you go to Norway and if you can, send me a letter before you have to leave. I'll be thinking about you constantly.
Bucky
P.S. When this is all over, I'll take you on that date. I promise and rarely do I break those promises.
Béatrice felt her eyes welling up with tears. She took a deep puff of her cigarette and inhaled, trying to pull herself together. She missed Bucky. She really missed him. In that moment, she wished that he was there with her and could hold her for a few minutes. Writing to him and reading his letters was going to become very difficult. With each letter she felt herself falling harder and harder. She knew she shouldn't, but she couldn't help what her heart wanted.
She smiled softly thinking about how badly his dates were going. She may have been overthinking it, but she believed it was because of her. He didn't want to date anyone. He didn't want to be with anyone else.
However, something pulled her back to reality. She told him to move on with his life. That's what he should have been doing. Her smile fell. He shouldn't be waiting on her. He deserved someone who would be there when he needed them to. Deep down, she knew she wasn't what he needed in life.
She extinguished the cigarette and hit her head on the table, groaning. How did she get herself into this mess? She was so confused. What was the right thing to do? The only thing she needed to do in that moment was respond to his letter. Let him know that she was alright and about to leave. However, it was going to take days for the letter to even get to him. She could leave and come back by the time it even got to him. Or worse….
She shook the negative thoughts from her head and a figure caught her eye. A tall, blonde female was walking past her desk with a stack of files in her hand.
"Private Lorraine" she called out causing the blonde to stop and turn to her.
The blonde's head perked up and she walked over to the desk. "Agent Faust, what can I do for you?"
"I hate to ask this, but I have a small favor if that's all right" the German explained.
Lorraine sat on the edge of her desk and shrugged. "Sure darling. Besides I owe you for helping me with filing that paperwork a few months ago. I'm at your service."
Béatrice gave her a small smile. "It was no trouble at all. Libby was an idiot for not properly teaching you anyway. I was wondering if it was possible to get a letter to the states rushed."
Lorraine bit her lip and squinted her eyes for a moment, clearly deep in thought. "Well to be honest, the only things we can rush are from Phillips directly…." The blonde's voice trailed off and her mouth turned to a smirk. "But if a letter accidently ended up in his pile, I doubt anyone would notice. You need to get something to the states?" She stopped and looked at the letters splashed out across the desk. "Does this have anything to do with the fact that you're constantly getting letters from the states now? Do you have someone special over there now?" she exclaimed excitedly.
Béatrice pursed her lips together in an attempt to hide a smile causing Lorraine to laugh. "I think the less you know the better, just in case."
"Jeez, he must be pretty special for you to be going against regulations to this extent. Figured you'd be more of a rule follower now since Vienna" Lorraine commented.
She shook her head. Everyone was still talking about Vienna. Clearly she would never live it down. "He's special" Béatrice told her nodding her head. "Very special."
Steve sat with Bucky in his friend's living room. The two men were sitting in silence, beers in hand. Silently, Steve looked at his friend. Something was still wrong with him. It was starting to really bother him. Bucky was not himself and there was no logical reason as to the cause.
Unbeknownst, Bucky was currently worrying his mind over the whereabouts of Béatrice in Norway. He continued to write letters to her daily. It was clear that he couldn't bring himself to stop thinking about her. She haunted his every thought and his dreams. Slowly, she was becoming his everything.
"You look exhausted. Still not sleeping much?" his friend asked looking at him.
Bucky shook his head. "Guess all those early mornings really screwed up my sleep schedule" he lied.
"Maybe give it a few weeks and then you'll finally get back on track" Steve suggested shrugging slightly. He took another sip of his beer and sighed deeply. "Got any plans tonight?" he asked changing the subject.
"Nope" Bucky replied taking a sip from his own beer. "Decided to take a break from the pattern of bad dates for a bit."
"I still can't believe that Bucky Barnes of all people is experiencing bad dates. It's like an oxymoron almost" his friend chuckled slightly.
"Shut up punk" Bucky glared at him. "It happens to everyone."
Steve let out huff and shook his head. "Not to you. Buck, are you sure you're okay? You seem a little more…. off than usual. It's almost like you're here physically, but your mind is elsewhere. You know you can tell me anything right?"
Bucky looked over at his friend and nodded. "Of course. I'm fine I promise. Just lack of sleep and I'm just anxious about getting orders that's all."
"You sure that's it?" Steve persisted, seemingly still unconvinced.
"Positive" Bucky told him nodding again. "If anything was wrong, I'd tell you. I'm fine really."
Steve stared at him quietly for a moment and sighed. He got up and put his coat back on. "I got to go, but I'll see you tomorrow. If you need anything or want to talk, I'm here."
"Thanks" Bucky muttered as he watched Steve leave the apartment. As soon as his friend shut the door, he pulled out an envelope from his pant pocket. Another letter from Béatrice. He had received it earlier today, but hadn't gotten a chance to read it. He was nervous to do so. He knew she had to be in Norway by now.
Shakily, he opened the envelope and pulled out the letter, skimming the words on the page.
Dear Bucky,
First off, I am not angry about all of the letters. Surprised, amused, but most certainly not angry. Write to me as often as you like. They always bring a smile to my face. You didn't have to do that, but I appreciate it. It definitely is a treat and gets my mind off of well…. everything.
I am so sorry it took that long for my letter to get to you. The military mail can be slow sometimes. However, I called in a favor with a friend for this one to try and get it to you a little faster. I'm leaving for Norway this evening. It's going to take us a few days to get there. Alexander, myself, and a team are posing as photographers for a French newspaper. We'll be smuggled into France under false identities and from there we'll be taking a plane to Norway. I know by the time you read this, you would have been worrying for days, please try not to. I'll be okay. I have old grumpy pants with me after all. It's a little nerve wracking, but I have been on tougher missions. But even that doesn't ease my mind at all. I'll be sure to write the moment I'm back in London. I promise.
I am so sorry about all of your bad dates. You really are having rotten luck aren't you? I don't think you should give up though. You just haven't met the right girl yet. Give it time. I'm sure wherever she is, she's worth the wait. You'll find her. You probably just aren't looking in the right places.
I spoke to Alexander about your dilemma and asked him what his secret was to a successful relationship like the one he had with Evelyn. He rolled his eyes at me and said "I doubt someone like James Barnes really needs advice like that. Obviously, he's not dating who he should be. Maybe he should open his eyes and make a move." I wasn't sure what he meant by that, but after some pestering he made it seem like you would. Take it as you will.
I really appreciated your words about my family and Rikfa. It gave my spirits a much needed lift. Thank you for being so understanding and allowing me to complain about it constantly. I'm sure it gets old to hear about it time and time again, but I'm just so tired of waiting. I'll try to keep faith. Truly I will, but sometimes I wonder if faith ever runs out.
I'm sorry to hear you haven't been sleeping. Have you tried some tea? I sometimes find that a nice cup of it helps me fall right asleep. Try it sometime. Maybe the lack of sleep is why you seem off to Steve. Please try and get some. You'll need your strength when you get your orders.
You are far too kind with your words about me. I'm nothing special I assure you. The most I did was probably just be honest with you. You did everything else yourself. You flatter me too much.
I miss seeing you every day and I still think about you. I'll write when I'm back. Maybe by then you'll have orders. Go try and have a good date for once. Pick a nice girl.
Béatrice
P.S. You won't be able to take me on that date if you meet someone. Remember that.
Bucky groaned and ran his hands through his hair. At least he knew she had gotten his letters before she left. Still, there was a lot in here that he didn't know what to do with. The first was McPherson's comment. He knew exactly what he meant. However, his eyes were open. He knew he wasn't dating the right person. But what was he supposed to do? She kept telling him to go out and date people. She said she missed him constantly, but was it enough? Did that mean she felt the same? The P.S. made him think otherwise.
The second was her mission. This didn't help calm his nerves at all. He was losing sleep over this. He just needed to know she was okay. He prayed she was okay. If he didn't hear from her, where would he go from there? He had found perfection, something that he thought was unattainable. Now that he had found it, how could anyone else compare.
"Please be okay sweetheart" he muttered to himself still looking at her letter.
Tønsberg, Norway March, 1942
The sound of another loud gunshot caused Béatrice to jump and nearly fall into Alexander's arms. They were about two miles outside of the town of Tønsberg. Up until this point, their mission had gone smoothly. A team had been sent with her and Alexander to allow for an easier transition and it had helped. There had been no issues getting into France or Norway. However, it was when they were finally close to Tønsberg when everything went south.
Their intel had said that HYDRA was not going to move into the Norwegian town until the next day, but it had been wrong. They had arrived just as HYDRA did. They had kept their distance from the town and decided to wait until the coast was clear for them to move in. But while they did, they heard the numerous gunshots and bombs go off within the area.
There was another loud crash heard throughout the wooded area they were held up in. "Jesus H. Christ" Alexander muttered looking around. "I thought we had another day."
"Obviously HYDRA decided to change their plans" the brunette quipped watching as another flash of light was seen in the sky. Once the light disappeared into the night, the sounds finally died down. It had become quiet, too quiet.
Suddenly there was a new sound erupting throughout the forest. It sounded mechanical and it was getting closer.
"Get down!" Alexander suddenly demanded and everyone dropped to the ground.
Looking up Béatrice squinted her eyes at the sight that was before her on the nearby road. Tanks were rolling through the forest along with numerous HYDRA patrolmen. The numbers were small, but it still seemed to make enough of an impact when it came to the destruction of the town.
After a moment, a car drove through. In it was a very familiar figure to her, Johann Schmidt, the head of HYDRA. He had been here. This changed everything. Clearly whatever the town had was important enough for him to be present.
They were too late. Hopefully they would at least be able to figure out what they took. If not, she wasn't sure where they were supposed to go from there.
The town was destroyed. Buildings were damaged beyond repair. Dead bodies were scattered throughout the main drag of the town. Nothing had survived at all. The air was still thick with smoke from all the discharged ammunition. Just looking at everything caused Béatrice to shudder. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. She had seen the Nazi's destruction first hand throughout various missions, but this was something she had never seen before.
This wasn't destruction. This was annihilation.
"I've never seen weapon damage this severe" Alexander commented looking around the town. "Have you?"
Béatrice took a few small steps and looked around the town. It was unreal. She knew the Nazi's were capable or horrendous acts, but this was entirely new. HYDRA was not like the Nazi's. They were much worse and more dangerous. If this was just a small taste of what they could do, she didn't even want to think about what else they were capable of.
"What the hell is HYDRA?" she breathed, her voice barely a whisper.
"Captain! Agent Faust" the pair turned to see one of the soldiers from their team running towards them. "Sir. Ma'am. The church is up ahead and there's a survivor. You need to come quickly."
Without any hesitation the pair quickly ran behind the solider and headed to the town's church. As the two approached closer and closer, Béatrice frowned at the site. The front of the church where the doors were did not exist. In its place was a rather large hole. Again, she was struck by the magnitude of weapons that HYDRA possessed. Sure they were part of the Nazi's, but it was almost as though HYDRA was much more powerful.
Without any hesitation the pair quickly followed the soldier towards the town's church. As they approached the church Beatrice's frown grew. The entire façade of the church was destroyed leaving only a gaping hole. Once again she was struck by the shear magnitude and destructive capability of the weapons that HYDRA possessed. They existed as a part of Hitler's Nazi regime but somehow they had become so much more powerful.
The soldier led them through the damage and into the church. Two other members of the team were surrounding someone on the floor.
"He's still alive, but barely. I'm not sure how much longer he'll last" the soldier turned to Alexander. As the blonde walked over to the wounded citizen, she stopped, noticing an intricate carving on one of the walls.
It was of a tree. Putting her hands into her pockets, she walked closer to it, admiring the detail of the carving. The carving of the bark ran down the wall and turned into snakes in some areas. Leaves engulfed the top of it. It was like nothing that she had ever seen before. It was quite beautiful.
"It was hidden there" she heard someone gasp out, causing her to turn. She frowned and walked over to the wounded citizen. His head was bleeding profusely and his breathing was broken and weak.
"What was hidden in there?" she asked gently kneeling down beside him.
"They…they took it" the man said weakly, his eyes fluttering open and close. "It's gone. They….they have it…."
"What did they take?" Alexander asked in response.
The man's breath hitched once more. It was clear his time on this Earth was slowly coming to an end. His strength was fading fast. "Something…..something that will destroy us all" he barely gasped out. With that his eyes shut and his breathing stopped.
Both Alexander and Béatrice looked at one another. They didn't know what HYDRA had taken from the church, but whatever it was, it was something that they were willing to decimate an entire city for.
There you have it! Thank you for all the reviews and the feedback. Big thanks as always to inperfection, who has literally become my life saver and an awesome beta. You rock darling and I appreciate you so so much! Next chapter will hopefully be up in a few days and we're getting more into TFA material. It's going to be good, so you won't want to miss it.
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Thank you as always for the review. Like I've said before, Evelyn is one of my favorites to write. She'll be making an appearance….well in letter form soon and she will not lose any spunk in that I assure you. Especially when it comes to the topic of Bucky. She has no filter. Thanks for the kind words as always darling!