One - Kate Fleming
It's quiet and she feels out of place, sitting at the glass with no one on the other side - though she isn't quite sure why. There's no one else in the room to judge her, so why does she feel so uncomfortable?
Kate sighs, flicking open her notebook and glancing through the pages. She's tired and as she reads, the words start to go fuzzy and meld into one. She closes her eyes, screwing them up, and rubs her forehead, wishing that she took some paracetamol before she left for this visit when she felt this headache coming on. She hadn't and now her head is pounding.
She leans back in her chair, just as the door at the back of the room through the glass swings open and Lindsay appears. Kate watches carefully as the other woman approaches the glass - knowing that the last time she was here, the visit didn't end very well. It's been two years since she was last here, but it doesn't seem like a lot has changed for Lindsay.
The opposite is true for Kate, as she feels the other woman's eyes fix on her stomach. She feels a little self-conscious, with Lindsay staring at her through the glass, but Kate just stares back, matching her intensity exactly.
Lindsay sits down, and to Kate's surprise, is the first to speak. "You're pregnant." She's stating the obvious, but Kate doesn't mind - at least they are talking at all. She had considered the fact that Lindsay might not have wanted to see her at all, let alone speak to her if she did come.
"Yeah," Kate replies, softly. "six months gone." She can feel Lindsay's cool gaze move away from her stomach and onto the floor.
"Boy or a girl?" Kate is wrong-footed by Lindsay's genial tone. The Lindsay she knew didn't do genial.
She clears her throat. "Rich and I, we decided not to find out until the birth." Silence follows her words, and she can hear the unasked question that must be on Lindsay's lips; does that mean she and Rich Akers are a couple? The answer to that question would be yes, but it's not something Kate wants to divulge to a near stranger. Her personal life is personal for a reason and she's already admitted too much.
"That's what I wanted to do..." Lindsay's words are soft, and quiet, and Kate gets the feeling she didn't mean to say them at all, the other woman's eyes flicking straight up to Kate's face after she says them, and she can see the sadness there, the weariness.
"Did you want kids?" She's not sure what posses her to ask Lindsay the question - it might have something to do with the fact that Kate feels like if they talk about what she's here to talk about, the meeting could be over very quickly.
"Did you ask me that question out of kindness or because you want to know why someone who wanted kids would have an abortion?" Lindsay's words are cold and cool, and they shock Kate. She knows about the abortion - everyone who reads the news knows about it, but she didn't think Lindsay would mention it. After the story broke, now a little under four years ago, she and Steve had discussed it and he'd revealed he already knew about Lindsay's pregnancy and subsequent termination. Steve had confessed that he'd asked Lindsay about it and she'd told him it was the worst thing she'd ever done and he'd had believed her. Even if Steve hadn't believed another damn thing that Lindsay had said, he believed her then.
That was why now, Kate didn't think the topic would come up - but she should have considered that it might. Lindsay was never that easy to predict.
"I'm sorry, I didn't-" She doesn't get any further, because Lindsay cuts her off.
"Why are you here?"
Kate coughs, gazing down at the notebook again, before speaking up. "Carly Kirk has been found."
Lindsay's eyes are suddenly alive and alert, fixing on Kate with surprising intensity. "She's been found?"
Kate nods, resting a hand on her swollen stomach as her baby gives a little kick. She sighs, as Lindsay nods in reply on the other side of the glass, her eyes moving away, as she computes the knowledge Kate has just given her.
She uses the lull to consider why she is here. Kate is using it as an escape from her life, from everything that's going on.
She got with Rich after her previous relationship had broken down so badly they'd got to the slamming doors and throwing plates territory, turned into screaming and shouting and angry recriminations and blame. There had been so much blame and all on her. And as a result, she hasn't seen her son in nearly a year.
Because it was her fault. Always her fault.
She doesn't blame him, not really. How would she have reacted if she'd discovered that he had been sleeping with someone else for months? Probably in exactly the same way he had reacted. They always had been quite similar - it was one of the things that had attracted her to him in the first place. Kate probably would have limited contact between him and their son, angry and betrayed, just like he had.
So, no, she doesn't really blame him.
That is why she is here - she might be happy with Rich, she might love him – but she'd loved the father of her son too, maybe a long time ago now - but she had loved him, once, more than the whole entire world and more than anyone she'd loved before and, Rich aside, since. Kate misses him and their son too, more than she would every say. More than she'd ever admit. And she can't really deal with that.
She'd been brought up thinking that love was simple and that when you fell in love you'd know. Kate had also been brought up to think that there would only be one man for her - the love of her life.
But now she knows that that is just a load of crap. She loves both of them, far too much for her own good. She'd never intended to have an affair, never intended to betray two people she cared about, had never intended for anyone to get hurt. She'd just been naive, thought, and people had been hurt.
She includes herself on the list. Rich too.
She doesn't know how long their relationship is going to last, for the shadows of their affair will always hang over them, as will the ghost of Jayne, and the wreckage that once was Kate's family.
She loves Rich and he loves her, of that she is certain. And yet, Kate doesn't know whether they'll last the years. Too much had to be destroyed to get to now.
She might be happy now, but it has come at a great cost - at great regret. And Kate hasn't quite worked out yet if it was worth all the heartache.
Damn, when did her life get so complicated?
But looking through the glass, Kate realises her life is wonderful compared to that of Lindsay. There's a pensive look on the other woman's face and her eyes are full of weariness. Kate feels pity rise up in her at the defeated woman sitting across from her, and for the first time, does not stop herself.
Things could be worse for her - her life is not bad. It's not perfect, or easy - but she still has her freedom, something Lindsay Denton won't have for a good eleven years now, and she still has something to live for.
Judging by the emptiness Kate saw in Lindsay's eyes the last time she was here; she has nothing.
"Where did you find her?" Lindsay's words snap her out of her reverie and she glances down at her notebook again.
"Carly was sighted at Leeds Railway station on the 8th. Two days later, after an extensive search of the area, she was discovered living in an abandoned warehouse with an eight month old girl assumed to be her daughter." Kate pauses, allowing Lindsay to absorb the information - knowing that sadly, the fate of Carly Kirk is worse than either of them could have imagined.
"Is she okay?"
"I'm not at-"
"Kate," Lindsay interrupts, her voice calm, but underneath, Kate can hear strains of anger, of desperation. "is Carly okay?"
"No, Lindsay, she's not." Kate's voice is flat and tired - she knows Lindsay's going to want details, details Kate doesn't want to talk about but knows she will. She can feel Lindsay's piercing gaze on her, beseeching her to answer. "Her boyfriend used her as a punching bag for two years. I don't think anyone would be okay after that, do you?" Her words are snapped, because she's angry -not at Lindsay, not at all - no, Kate's angry at the bastard who kicked Carly around for two years.
She doesn't want to think about Carly Kirk and the dreadful hand life has handed her. She doesn't want to think about it, but she can't stop herself.
A solemn silence descends on the pair of them, both privately outraged over the way a teenage girl has been treated by someone whom she trusted. Kate can see the sadness and the anger in Lindsay's eyes as the other woman looks back at her.
"At least she safe now." Lindsay concedes, a moment or two later, her voice quiet.
"Yeah. At least she's safe."
They slip back into silence, and Kate has no inclination to break it - she's said all she needs to say.
Lindsay only speaks once more, her voice far too quiet and Kate nearly misses her words. "Thank you."
No matter what Lindsay has done wrong in her life, caring too much about Carly Kirk is not one of them, Kate thinks to herself, as she stands and leaves the prison, leaving Lindsay Denton far behind.
...