Chapter 11: Waiting

Kagami ran in with a stretcher and rushed Joselyn to to hospital ward with Jared running behind. As the minutes passed, the dread was knotting up in his stomach, so he had to be sure Joselyn would live.

As Kagami fixed Joselyn's throat, Jared's thoughts were running rampant. Joselyn had tried to commit suicide. She did it to kill Iku. Why though? Was it because of what happened to him? He clenched his fist a little. He had missed so much, so there wasn't anywhere for him to start this puzzle.

He held Joselyn just a little tighter as Kagami worked, as if doing so could reverse everything that had happened. He would do anything if it meant that...that Joselyn hadn't done… this. This wasn't... it shouldn't have happened. How could Joselyn have been that unhappy?

Jared watched as Gizmo gently cleaned the rest of the dried blood from Joselyn's throat and then changed her shirt, and felt his heart stutter when he realized there was a word carved into the skin. The word MONSTER.

"What is that!?" His voice was strangled, as if he didn't have enough air left to say those words. And maybe he didn't. Nothing was right anymore. He was vaguely aware of Kelly leaving the room, hands clenched in his brown-black hair, as if suddenly unable to take any more. Jared might have joined him, but Joselyn's dead—no, just weight—but Joselyn's weight was resting against him, and he couldn't bear the thought of letting go.

"Kagami?" Tears obscured Jared's vision, and he couldn't wipe them away without moving his arms from where they held Joselyn against him. The tears fell down his cheeks. "Gizmo... why? What does this mean?" His voice cracked, but he couldn't care less about that.

Gizmo shook her head, and Jared saw, with some shock, tears glimmering in the apathetic girl's eyes. Sure, he knew Joselyn was Gizmo's first friend other than MurderBot, but he'd never seen the girl cry before. Jared looked up towards where Camille was still standing against the door frame, as if the wood was all that was keeping her upright. Joselyn had affected so many lives, not just his life, so seeing her like this was painful on all of them, whether she knew it or not.

"Jared?" Kagami's voice brought Jared out of his thoughts, and, looking down, he noticed that she was done treating the wound, which looked a lot more manageable when covered in white cloth. "We should move her."

Jared nodded and stood, slipping a hand under Joselyn's knees and arms, hoisting the her up so as to carry her back to her own room. He placed Joselyn on her bed, and noticed Kelly standing in the corner, arms resolutely folded and jaw locked so as not to cry. But it seemed Jared wasn't the only one unable to hold back tears. There were still bloodstains on the floor and glass shards from the once again broken mirror. They really needed to remove the mirrors in there.

Kagami and Gizmo followed Jared, and once Joselyn was on the bed, they busied about their younger friend, checking her pulse and hooking her up to various machines. There was relative silence for a few moments, Jared's mind too exhausted to do much more thinking. Zoe would have a field day with that. Kelly and Camille were still standing silently, either lost in their own thoughts, or in the struggle to hold back tears. Jared wasn't sure which. They probably would have stayed that way for a while, had a knock not come at the door then, the sound making Kelly jump a little, startled.

Jared watched the older mage open the door a little ways, speaking with whoever was outside briefly before letting them through. It was Zoe. The Worldbender's face was set in apprehension, leading Jared to guess that Kelly had told her something bad had happened. When she saw Joselyn, saw the bandages all along Joselyn's throat, the pale skin, the blood that still soaked the girl's old clothes, her eyes widened and Jared knew she knew what had happened. Zoe clamped a hand to her mouth, but still a strangled sound escaped her. She closed her eyes tightly, shaking her head slightly before forcing words from a locked jaw.

"Gina's looking for you. You might want to go find her before she finds this…" She trailed off and leaned heavily against the wall. Kelly clapped Zoe on the shoulder, then moving to put a hand on Jared's shoulder, steering him out the door.

As soon as the door closed, both men leaned against the wall, letting out long breaths. "What...?" Jared croaked.

"Best not to dwell on any of that now," Kelly said. "Think of this as a mission. A quest to tell Gina and not… well... scare her."

"That seems as good a plan as any," Jared agreed, and pushed himself off the wall to walk down the hall, hopefully in the direction of Gina.

Five minutes later

They found Gina leaving Jared's room, a look of annoyance on her face. Kelly didn't want to tell her what had happened, because really, he was still processing it himself. Not only would telling her scare her, but it would make it real. A large part of him was still hoping feverishly that this was some messed-up dream that he'd wake up from momentarily.

"Jared! Where've you been?" Gina asked. "Dinner's getting cold." Then she asked a question that made Kelly's blood run cold. "Where's Joselyn?"

Jared makes a kind of choking noise, like the words were stuck halfway up his throat, but Kelly makes no noise because he didn't have the air to support it. He felt like he'd just hit a brick wall.

"What happened?" Gina asked quietly, her voice low, almost pleading.

Something in Kelly's mind must have been working, because he got them all into Jared's room. Better to say this kind of thing in private. "Something... happened Gina," Jared said, and Gina sat in a strait-backed chair. Jared walked over to her, sinking into a chair himself. Kelly leaned against one of the bedposts.

"What is it?" She asked.

"Joselyn's been hurt... she lost a lot of blood. Kagami and Gizmo are treating her now..." he trailed off, running his hand over his eyes. "It's bad, Gina. Really bad."

"How was she hurt?" Gina asked, but she didn't seem worried whatsoever—Kelly actually noticed she sounded a little giddy. Jared looks to Kelly now, a slight panic in his features. How were they going to tell Gina what their friend had done to herself?

"Jared," Gina's voice held a grain of warning, and Jared's hand twitched toward his throat. Gina's eyes widened, and she smiled. Jared glared,

"What did you do?"

Cue the loudest argument fucking ever. Kelly was busy trying to keep Jared's powers in check lest someone—or everyone—died a horrible death.

Turned out Gina didn't feel bad about Joselyn's suicide attempt at all, and was even a little excited. And while Kelly knew the real reason why that not even Gina herself knew, he was still furious.

Jared stormed off, followed by Kelly. And they both ran back to Joselyn's room.

When they reached Joselyn's room, Jared let out a pained cry. Joselyn lay, pale as she had been when the two young men had left a few minutes ago. Camille had Zoe in a hug, and Kelly watched as Jared pulled up a chair to sit beside Joselyn. "How is she?" Jared asked Kagami, voice rough.

"There's not much more I can do for her," Kagami said quietly. "She's lost a lot of blood, and if she doesn't... if she doesn't fight to live, there's nothing anyone can do for her."

Kelly felt the air leave him again. He turned to look at Zoe, who was white as a ghost. Still, despite the shock on his elder daughter's face, Kelly also noticed that she was thinking. No doubt trying to find a way to make Joselyn live, to force her to fight. And why shouldn't she? Joselyn was family. She really wasn't allowed to just give up. So when Zoe left, Kelly went with her, Jared's quiet sobs still echoing in his mind.

OoOoO

It was a long night. Jared stayed up with Joselyn, encouraging Gizmo to get some sleep when the young girl with the prehensile hair started yawning more frequently. Gizmo had given him a bowl of cold water and a washcloth, along with instructions to wake her if Joselyn got any worse. Which, if he was honest with himself, Jared didn't see as possible. Joselyn's fever had only risen since the others had left, the girl was drenched in sweat, her chest barely rising. The bandages had been changed, and the new dressings were slowly becoming stained with red. Her face flushed red with fever, except where it was almost white from blood loss.

Jared quietly sponged Joselyn's brow, trying to cool her down. She whimpered quietly, and Jared stopped for a moment, hoping for her eyes to open, for just a sliver of blue-violet surrounded by the red eyelids. But nothing happened, and Jared re-soaked the washcloth, wrung it out, and placed it again on Joselyn's sweaty forehead. Taking another cold, wet washcloth, Jared dabbed along his friend's neck. Jared could feel the heat of the skin through the washcloth, the fever rising a little more. A little too much.

Joselyn began gasping, as though she couldn't get enough air, and Jared quickly shook Gizmo awake. The mechanic hurried to her friend's side, instructing Jared to roll her onto her side. Gizmo checked Joselyn's pulse, frowning as she pressed fingers to Joselyn's neck. Jared felt fear flow through him, filling him and obscuring his vision.

"What's wrong?" He choked out once he could talk.

"Her powers should be healing her," Gizmo said, moving quickly to the table still covered in various machines. "But it isn't."

"Meaning?" Jared asked, sitting back down on the chair by the patient bed.

"From what I've observed in the last year, she doesn't know her own powers and relies on Iku's," Gizmo said sadly.

"So Iku won't heal her?" Jared asked, watching as Gizmo flitted around the table, gathering things that... Jared was pretty sure he didn't want to know.

"She will heal Joselyn," Gizmo said absently. "But we need to unlock her. The last time Joselyn was really able to do magic like this while... unconscious, was when she asked to be poisoned, before you woke up."

"You let her poison herself?!"

"She asked," Gizmo replied quietly, slipping into her "depression" mood, "And she is my first friend. She wanted to find a way to wake you up." Jared's mind powers told him there was more to the story, but that was at least part of the truth.

He nodded to himself, turning back to Joselyn, whose breathing had eased slightly with the transition to her side. "Why didn't you do this before now?" He asked, going back to his job of sponging the sweaty skin as Gizmo pulled out a vial Zoe had brought a few hours back.

"I'm not sure how Iku will react," Gizmo said quietly, "This is a kind of last resort. Zoe and Eli made it with Eden's healing powers. Either Iku will heal her, or it will be too much for her to handle." Jared heard what Gizmo was not saying. Either the magic would save Joselyn, or it will kill her.

"Is there nothing else we can do?"

Gizmo shook her head. "There's no time for other things, and if Joselyn has lost the will to live, she's not going to be helping us. We have to encourage Iku to help her."

The half-moon outside the window bathed the windowsill in a mystical light, but the lamps inside the room chased it away, kept the cold light outside. Joselyn's face was cast into sharp relief, her cheekbones sharper and her eyes sunken. She looked almost ghostly, as though she had died and come back. Jared shook that thought from his head. His mind was slow with sleep deprivation and the stress of the day, and it was making him see things. That was all. It was not some crazy premonition. This had nothing to do with his newfound powers.

Gizmo came over, stirring the mixture in a small bowl. She directed Jared to get behind Joselyn, and he did so, propping her up in front of him so his friend's head fell back against his muscular shoulder. Gizmo came forward with the mixture, putting it to Joselyn's lips and tilting it to poor it her mouth. Gizmo gently massaged Joselyn's throat with one hand to get her to swallow, making sure to avoid the stitches, breathing a sigh of relief as the elixir went down.

"This could take a while to take effect," Gizmo said quietly, moving to clean the table, hands shaking with delayed stress.

Jared stayed put for a while, feeling Joselyn's fever through both their shirts. He grabbed a cloth, sponging the back of Joselyn's neck, cold drops chasing the sweat down her neck and under the collar of her soft yet oversized pajama shirt. He winced, remembering how that shirt had been just her size before a growth spurt, yet it was oversized now.

Exhaustion washed over him, and he carefully extricated himself from behind her. Lowering Joselyn slowly back down to the mattress, Jared almost missed the first spark. It was a bright white-blue, and skittered across the bandages before sinking into a sliver of visible pale skin.

"Gizmo," Jared said, and the mechanic turned back towards the bed. "It's working."

Gizmo watched with a critical eye as a few more sparks skittered past the bandages. "We need to remove the bandages," she said. "Iku needs to be able to reach her bare skin." Quickly, Jared helped Gizmo undo the strips of cloth from around Joselyn's throat. The wounds were still leaking beads of bright red blood, and Jared had to look away at the word MONSTER, feeling the need to vomit, or punch something. Hard. He decided he would choose that option later.

The sparks came more freely now, streaming from pale, slender fingers and sinking into her throat, stitching the skin together. The skin was regenerating as Gizmo and Jared watched with baited breath. It would scar, and Jared knew if he decided to spar the next day, he'd be rather hard on the person that went against him at the thought of the word MONSTER permanently carved into little sister's arm.

But all of that was pushed to the back of his mind about an hour later as the sun began to rise, and Joselyn's chest was still rising and falling.

It was morning, and Joselyn was still alive.

OoOoO

Kelly was woken in the morning by Zoe. He groaned, turning over as his daughter started shaking him. For a moment, Kelly wondered where Joselyn was. Then it hit him. "Oh God, Zoe, Joselyn," he gasped. And suddenly he could barely breathe. He had no idea how he had fallen asleep last night, because the fear was squeezing his heart so hard it hurt.

"Joselyn's alive, Dad." Zoe said, kissing him lightly on the forehead as he stood up from the bed. "Cam went to check earlier this morning. Jared said there was a scare at some point during the night, but Joselyn pulled out of it fine." Kelly was only half-listening from behind the changing screen, but froze in the act of tugging his shirt on over his head when Zoe spoke again. "Gizmo says she's not out of danger yet, though. And she still hasn't woken up yet." He pulled the plaid fabric down roughly, walking from behind the screen to look at Zoe.

"What does 'not out of danger' mean?" She shrugged, but Kelly could see the worry in her eyes even without reading her mind. They hadn't told Eden of this yet, because she was already delicate enough.

"I don't know," she said, "But Dad... I'm afraid." Kelly embraced her quickly, pressing her into him, taking some comfort in her closeness, and hopefully offering some in return. His own heart was thudding in his chest, and it was all he could do not to sprint strait to the Joselyn's room.

"Come on dude, let's go check on him," he said quietly, leading her towards the doors.

"Without breakfast?" She asked quietly.

"Not hungry."

As they walked, Kelly's thoughts were running rampant. How the hell hadn't he seen this?! It was just like how he hadn't known the Darkling Maeve was abusing Zoe. He was a fucking mind mage! He should have been the first to know and was actually one of the last.

In the recesses of his mind, he knew it wasn't really his fault for either. Stupid mental shields. Maeve had asked to learn them back when they were first married, when reading her thoughts showed nothing but love for their daughter, so her using mental shields wasn't suspicious. Joselyn, he had assumed, kept them up for the same reason as Adrien: avoiding pranks. And her being tired was a normal thing with grief because Jared had been sleeping for months.

But still…he had been able to stop Zoe when she got too suicidal. She too had learned mental shields, but self-harm was not what she was focused on hiding, so he stopped her more times than one. He gave her all the love he could and even quit jobs so he could spend more time with her, not wanting to come home and hear she was dead.

But why couldn't he have stopped Joselyn?

It would be one thing if nobody had known, and nobody could have stopped it. But people had known, and didn't stop it. Gizmo didn't stop it because she was a scientist at heart, so she allowed the dangerous experiments. But Gina had downright hoped Joselyn would die. That was the difference, Gizmo was willing but would have stopped if Joselyn was dying, while Gina would have simply pushed harder. Having read both their minds, he learned that Gizmo was dangerously apathetic, and most emotions were a facade, but her feeling for Joselyn were genuine and the young girl was just as afraid of them as anyone would be if they felt emotion for the first time.

With Gina, he would under normal circumstances make her life a living hell, but she was heartbroken at how Jared had basically ended their friendship and stormed off. Kelly was sadistic, yeah, all the shit he did to Gabriel was proof of that, but not cruel. There was a fine line, but there was a line.

If Joselyn died, he would gladly cross that line. Nobody hurt his daughters—or worse let them die—and got away with it. The only reason Gabriel was only the victim of many pranks and not suffering was because he had had a chance to kill Zoe, when she was in a coma on life support, he could have pulled the plug, but he didn't.

They arrived in Joselyn's room after a minute or so, and Kelly suddenly found the fear welling up again. What if something bad had happened since Zoe had been told Joselyn was alright? What if she wasn't alright anymore? What if… what if… what if…

It was Camille who opened the door. She looked a little shell-shocked, the skin around her eyes tight and red. Silently, she let them into the room.

Jared was sitting against one wall, looking like he had dozed off there a few moments ago, and Gizmo was looking through some books with MurderBot. Joselyn was still laying on the bed. She looked no different than the day before, and it took Kelly a moment after he had sat down to notice the bandages were gone, the skin crossed in white scars. "What?" he asked quietly, "How did they heal so quickly?"

"Used that elixir Zoe and Eli made." Gizmo replied, without looking up from her books. Zoe ran her fingers across Joselyn's pale arms, tracing the scars that stood out there. One particular pattern stood out to Kelly. "Will these scars ever fade?" He asked, his voice suddenly hoarse and breaking. He was afraid, so very afraid. Please, he thought, please say they will.

"I'm afraid they will not," Gizmo said sadly, still resolutely facing the books, though Kelly had eyes only for the word carved into Joselyn's arm. He wanted to break down at the thought of that word being there forever, a constant reminder of the suffering he failed to prevent.

Camille had leaned against one wall, eyes trained on Joselyn's pale, unmoving face. "You'll call for me, if anything changes?" He asked hoarsely. Gizmo nodded absently, setting aside the book she had been looking at for a moment, before picking up another.

Kelly didn't know how long he sat there... it was a long time, he supposed, because at some point Zoe had gone to work with a gentle squeeze of his shoulder. Joselyn was alive, which was good. The wounds had healed quickly, which was also good. But she still wasn't awake, and something about that scared him. He didn't want any of this to continue.

He also knew Jared was shirking his duties as Blight General—though really, if not being around for a year hadn't gotten him demoted or fired, nothing would—but he just couldn't bring himself to care. Joselyn would want them both to be responsible, he knew this, but Joselyn couldn't tell them that, could she? Kelly would gladly hear everything she had to say on the matter, if she would just. Wake. Up!

Jared woke sometime after lunch, doing so silently, leaving to go destroy some unsuspecting punching bag. At that point, Kelly was staring fixedly at the wall, thumb idly stroking the back of Joselyn's hand, the only unscarred part of his youngest daughter he could reach easily.

"He'll be alright," Kagami said from behind him, making Kelly jump. He didn't mean to snarl back the way he did, he really didn't. But he just couldn't help it.

"You call this alright?" He growled, gesturing towards Joselyn. Toward the word carved into her arm, the other scars on her body, and the most recent one across her throat. "What made her do this? Not something that has disappeared in the last day!"

"Maybe if you ask, she'll tell you when she wakes up," Kagami said. "You know, I've heard that unconscious people can still sometimes hear people they care about if those people speak to them. Joselyn's really upset, maybe if you spoke to her…"

"There's always been more to her," Kelly said quietly. He didn't even understand why he was being quiet, as if Joselyn might overhear. "I promised that this time would be different. I wouldn't let her get hurt like her sisters were. I would always be there." He gave a bitter laugh. "I'm not really living up to that right now."

"You're giving it your best shot," Kagami said, looking down at Joselyn. "And she asks no more from you than that."

OoOoO

Two days had passed and Jared was restless.

It turned out, not only did he have Kelly's powers, he also had all sorts of psychic abilities, including but not limited to telekineses, force fields and the seer ability. And then there were nightmares of his time being tortured by Iku, and terror for Joselyn, and rage at Gina.

To say the least, the last few days had sucked. Many punching bags had been destroyed.

Right now, he was sitting at Joselyn's bedside. He didn't really want to be anywhere else. He needed answers. If she had been so unhappy, why did she wait until he woke up to attempt suicide? Did Iku take control of Joselyn and fake the whole thing—words did not describe how much he prayed for that to be the case—so they thought Joselyn was suicidal when she wasn't?

He was brought from his worried musings when he noticed the vase of flowers Adrien had brought was floating around the room. It wasn't doing much, just floating there. He wasn't great at controlling that power, so he just left it be. Last time he tried to make something move, it shattered and made a mess.

He jerked to look at the bed when he heard Joselyn making tiny noises. At first, he worried her fever was getting worse or she was dying, but the machines were still working and saying her heartbeat was relatively normal.

"Joselyn?" She was twitching a little. Was it happening. He turned and ran to the door, "Gizmo! I think she's waking up!" Gizmo ran in and both beamed when they were staring into a pair of blue-violet eyes.

…

The first thing Joselyn saw once her eyes adjusted to the light was Jared's worried face. The next was Gizmo. She blinked, more than a little concerned to see the normally emotionless mechanic so concerned.

"I'm dead," Joselyn said with a certainty. Her voice hurt, rasping against her dry throat. "I must be dead, I think I died and went to… somewhere." That was as far as she got before Jared lunged at her. She let out a squeak as Jared's arms encircled her chest. She was so surprised, she almost didn't hear what he was saying frantically into her ear.

"Never again, Joselyn. Don't do that ever again. I couldn't take it. Never again," he repeated the words, and Joselyn awkwardly patted his back. There was something comforting though, in being held like this. Like she mattered. Like someone cared.

Almost as if Jared had heard her thoughts, he pulled back, holding Joselyn at arm's length to search her face with his now dark-blue eyes—the same color her Dad's eyes became when sad. "Why?" he asked, "Why did you do it, Joselyn?" tears fell slowly down Jared's face, and his voice broke at the end of his question. Wait…tears? Jared was crying!? Then the question itself registered in Joselyn's over-active brain.

Shrinking back, she shook her head vigorously. She couldn't tell Jared. She couldn't! He would hate her forever. He would kill her. Joselyn knew she couldn't stand that; she wouldn't mind dying—as long as she took Iku with her—but she would sooner do just about anything than have Jared hate her.

The worry visible on Jared's face skyrocketed. Zoe put a hand on Jared's shoulder, tugging him gently back as another face near-filled Joselyn's vision. Gizmo.

She wanted to ask why she was here, why she wasn't dead. But her mouth was dry as a reed, as if she'd eaten sand. Gizmo's hand felt at her forehead and her neck, blessedly cool against skin she hadn't noticed was sweating. "He'll understand." She murmured, so quietly that Joselyn barely heard her, despite the fact her mouth couldn't have been four inches from her ear as she lowered her so she was laying on her back again. Wordlessly, because she didn't trust herself to speak, Joselyn shook her head. Gizmo sighed.

"Now's the best time of any," she said quietly. "Jared would do anything in this moment to keep you safe. No matter what." Joselyn doubted this. Jared should be hating her guts for what Iku had done to him, like how Gina hated her. Why should this have changed in the amount of time she'd been unconscious? Well, you seem to have almost bled to death, came a voice, unbidden, from the back of her mind.

"He's gonna find out eventually, whether you tell him or not," Gizmo said quietly. "Actually, your note told a lot of the story. Depression and desire to kill the demon inside you. That same demon that saved your life." She had a damp washcloth and was wiping the sweat from her face. She motioned for something, taking a cup from someone just out of Joselyn's line of sight.

Jared's face was suddenly next to Gizmo's, taking the washcloth from her as she helped Joselyn drink. The water felt wonderful sliding down her sore throat.

"Hey, Jos, don't worry," Jared said, pressing the washcloth to her forehead, above her terrified eyes. "Killing Iku…that makes sense. Just wish you had told me there were other things bothering you rather than, well, this." Jared gestured to Joselyn's throat and left arm, and, with shaking fingers, Joselyn tugged her sleeve up to expose the scars. The word MONSTER was etched by a shaky hand into the pale skin. Then Kelly joined the others in sitting on the bed.

"You knew you could have come to me," he said quietly as Gizmo took the washcloth back from Jared, dropping it back into a bowl of water and wringing it out. The splashing water permeated the silence following Kelly's plea. "Why didn't you come to me?"

"There was no reason to burden you with my problems," Joselyn said, just as quietly. The tired slump of his father's shoulders told Joselyn that the man had not slept for at least two days. Or at least not well.

"If it was reason enough to do this, it was reason enough to talk with me," Kelly said. Joselyn looked away. She hated disappointing people, but all the same, that seemed to be what she did on a daily basis.

"We're not blaming you Joselyn," Gizmo said quietly, sponging Joselyn's brow again. "We're simply telling you we're here." She sighed, "Your fever is getting worse. I'll wait until Kagami gets back, I think, before I try anything."

"I'll go find her. I think she's in the library," Kelly said, stepping away from the bed. Joselyn watched the her father lay a hand on Jared's shoulder before leaving. The door shut heavily behind him. Gizmo sighed, looking after Kelly.

Zoe came over from where she was leaning in the doorway, "Joselyn, we're going to help you get Iku out, but you have to promise to not pull anything like this again."

Joselyn cracked a reluctant smile, "I promise." But she had to fight back tears when she heard Iku in her head.

"You should have gone for the head."

A/N: Joselyn lives! And Iku is being extra evil. Next chapter goes over reasonable methods of getting Iku out, and Kelly giving Jared lessons on how to use his powers. Hilarity will ensue.

And as usual, remember to review.