The next morning was hazy.
Dean woke up in his side of the bed, but he knew he wasn't alone. It took one look to his left to find Castiel's sleeping face right beside him. Somehow, they'd both manage to stay on their side of the bed, but their legs weren't that careful. Dean lifted up the blanket that covered both of their bodies, and noticed the way their legs were tied together. He thought of pulling away from the entangled mess, but Castiel was already waking up by the time Dean tried to move.
"My head," Castiel said, sitting up and cradling his head in his hands.
Dean rushed out of bed. He came back with two Advil and a cold glass of water. "Take this."
Cas barely registered what Dean gave him before he swallowed down the pills and chugged the full glass of water. Dean sat on the edge of the bed. "It isn't fair that you have such a high tolerance for alcohol."
"I've had a lot of practice," Dean said, smiling.
Castiel was having a hard time meeting Dean's eyes, which made it harder for Dean to look away. He thought maybe Cas didn't remember what he'd done the night before. Dean had a slight suspicion that he wouldn't have done it if he hadn't been drunk.
"I do remember," Cas said suddenly, shaking his head. "I stepped over the line."
"It's not a big deal," Dean said. It wasn't like the thought of kissing Castiel hadn't occurred to him before. He just never acted on it.
Cas looked at him, and his ears got red. "Really? Are we okay?"
"Dude, we're great."
Cas hesitated before he went on. "We are—Dean, we're friends, and we're roommates, and coworkers, and you're the alleged father of Bela's unborn baby. This…this has no chance of ever happening, does it?"
Dean let out a long breath. "I know. And I get it." But I don't like it.
"For whatever it's worth, I love waking up to you, even with a hangover." Castiel flashed a tiny smile before he hopped out of bed.
Dean watched his friend disappear out of his room with longing. He felt like a coward. He was prepared to let him go.
Dean made pancakes for breakfast. Sam decided to sleep in. He knew that Sam adored spring break for the sole reason of sleeping in every single day. It was a rare privilege. So Dean was forced to sit at the table alone with Cas.
"We should wait for Sam to eat," Castiel suggested.
"We could be waiting for hours," Dean said.
Castiel nodded, digging into his breakfast.
Dean swung his foot under the table and smiled as it bumped against Castiel's leg. Cas glanced at him as he chewed and rolled his eyes. Dean rubbed his toe against Castiel's leg and watched as he squirmed under his touch.
"Dean," Cas said warningly as he took a sip of his coffee.
"Aren't you just a little bit curious?" Dean asked, swallowing.
"Curious about what?" Castiel tilted his head.
Dean willed himself to continue. "About us."
"As in, you and me?" Castiel raised his eyebrows.
Dean nodded slowly.
"What exactly are you implying, Dean?"
Dean shrugged. "We should try this. We should finish what we started last night. If it doesn't work, we'll go back to the way it used to be. It'll be like nothing ever happened. But at least we'll know we're not missing out on something great."
Castiel beamed at him. "I'm in."
Dean chewed his lip to contain his grin. He continued rubbing his foot against Castiel's leg.
"Are we going to hide this from everyone?" Castiel asked.
Dean looked up. "I don't know."
Castiel pondered. "Perhaps we should, at least while we decide what to do."
"Alright." Dean nodded. He wasn't sure how many secrets he could keep, but he would keep this one. For Cas. Dean stretched his arm on the table, continuing with his breakfast. Then, Castiel touched his fingertips to Dean's. The touch was thrilling. Castiel continued tracing patterns on Dean's hand as they finished their pancakes.
"Guys, why didn't you wake me up?" Sam asked, entering the room.
Dean quickly removed his arm and buried his hands under the table, knocking his knee against the table in the process. "Crap."
"What's wrong with you?" Sam asked, but it felt more like a rhetorical question, so Dean ignored it.
"I thought I'd let you rejoice in the glory of sleep," Dean said, pushing the plate of pancakes toward his brother. "Dig in."
Sam pulled up a chair and joined them. "I talked to Jess last night. She'll be here a couple nights visiting some friends. She asked me if I wanted to go with her."
Dean locked eyes with Cas and smirked. "Sounds like my baby brother has game with the ladies."
"Jess will be here tonight, so please don't embarrass me," Sam begged, drowning his pancakes in syrup.
"When have I ever—"
"Do you really want me to go over this?" Sam stared at him.
Dean made a face. "Whatever, Sammy. I'm going to have to interview this girl. I need to know if she's smart enough to put up with you."
"She's smarter than me." Sam wolfed down his pancakes.
"She sounds like a lovely person," Cas said.
Sam grinned at him. "Yeah, she is. I can't wait for you to meet her, Cas. Can I count on you to keep Dean in check?"
"Hey," Dean interjected.
"Of course," Cas said, nodding.
"I was thinking we could go to dinner together," Sam said, chewing on his pancakes. He pointed his fork at Dean. "I'm staying with her and her friends tonight, so don't wait up for me."
"Just be careful, Sammy," Dean said.
"I hate to leave you and Cas alone again," Sam said.
"We'll find a way to pass the time," Dean said, sending a wink to Castiel across the table. Cas flushed, fixing his eyes on his plate.
Sam hummed. "These are really good, Dean. I missed your food."
"Did you get all those care packages I've sent you?" Dean mumbled.
"Oh yeah, ate everything," Sam said, looking at Dean with a wide smile. "But this is better."
Dean nodded. "I know." He waited a beat. "And you're still leaving me for that girl."
Sam laughed. "I'm not leaving you. I'm coming to see you on the set tomorrow. Is it okay if I bring Jess along?"
"Sure," Dean said. "I guess you want to meet Bela?"
"If she's really having my future niece or nephew, then yes," Sam said, looking from Dean to Cas. "You guys are being too secretive. I know you're hiding something."
"I'm going to get in the shower," Cas said, rising from his seat. "Sam, I'm glad you're here." Cas picked up his plate and put it in the sink before he left.
Sam pushed his empty plate forward. "Is there anything you want to say to me, Dean?"
The way Sam looked at him made Dean shrink half his size. He knew he wouldn't be able to keep up this lie for much longer.
"Well…" Dean said. Was he really going to do this? Was he going to risk losing the peace that he had with his brother over some stupid lie?
"You're scared to be a dad," Sam said. "That's why you're avoiding all things Bela, right?"
Dean rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, that's exactly why."
"Well, I think you'll be a great dad." Sam gave him a crooked smile. It was coy. "Sometimes I think you'll be better than Dad."
Dean didn't know what to say to that.
They picked an Italian restaurant named Achille's. The plan was for Dean and Cas to head there first to grab a table while Sam met up with Jess and brought her along.
Dean had dressed up for the occasion, and so had Castiel. They stopped at the entrance. The place was packed. Dean asked for a table for four and waited with Cas at the bar.
"Two beers," Dean said to the barkeeper. Dean took a sip of his beer, and then his hand roamed mysteriously to Castiel's back and settled there. He didn't realize he'd wanted to touch him until he already was.
Castiel glanced at him with a smile. "Careful, Dean. Someone might capture our inappropriate touching in public and start other rumors."
Dean rolled his eyes, although Cas was right in his assumption. "Who's going to care if I kiss you right now?"
Cas raised an eyebrow. "My guess is everyone in this room."
"Yeah, right."
Cas took a sip of his beer. "Public displays of affection don't suit actors very well, especially when they are kissing a person of the same gender."
Dean scoffed. "I'll kiss you right here, I don't give a damn."
"I don't believe you," Cas said.
"Is that a challenge?" Dean asked. He put down his beer and tilted Castiel's chin forward. "I'll do it."
Castiel grinned. "So much for keeping it secret."
Dean leaned closer, but he stopped himself when he heard his name. He dropped his hand and looked up.
A woman he'd never seen before stepped up to him. She was holding out her cell phone in request for a picture. "I loved Supernaturally," she told him. "I only watched it for you."
He got that a lot.
Castiel seemed ready to move away, but Dean didn't want that. Dean snaked an arm around Castiel's shoulders.
"Stay with me," Dean whispered in his ear before smiling to the woman. She told him her name was Tessa. "It's very nice to meet you, Tessa."
"Would it be okay to take a picture?" she asked. It finally seemed to hit her that Dean was with Cas. "Excuse me, are you Castiel Novak?"
Castiel cleared his throat, freeing himself from Dean's hold. He nodded his head before he mumbled a quick assertion.
"You're the guy in Patched up Promises, aren't you?" Tessa asked. "I almost didn't recognize you without the blond hair. I love that movie."
The disheveled look in Castiel's face had turned into confusion. "You saw that?"
"Yes, and it was wonderful," Tessa said. "I can't believe I'm standing in front of you."
Castiel made an awkward noise and disguised it as laughter.
Dean smiled at him. "His baby blues tend to have that effect."
Tessa asked a random passerby to take a picture, and then she stood at Castiel's side. Once the picture was taken, she hugged both of them and she was gone.
"Are you alright?" Dean asked Cas, who looked like he was about to pass out.
"I wasn't expecting that," Cas said, downing the rest of his beer.
"I couldn't let you leave."
Cas took a deep breath. "That wasn't terrifying."
"No, it wasn't," Dean said, rubbing Castiel's back. "You handled it really well."
"If you say so."
Dean leaned closer to whisper again into Cas's ear, "I'm still going to kiss you."
Castiel ran a hand through his hair. "You are making my heart go ballistic."
That was the single greatest thing Dean had ever heard. He resisted the urge to kiss Castiel because now he was sure someone would capture it on camera. He wouldn't do that to Cas.
Dean pressed his nose to Castiel's cheek. Then, he finished the rest of his beer.
Sam and Jess arrived a few minutes after they got their table.
Jess was a beautiful girl, and she had a firm handshake. The first words that came out of her mouth were, "Samuel, please." She was scolding Sam about something as they reached their table. Dean instantly liked her.
After their introduction, Jess went on to talking about how happy she was to finally be meeting Sam's older brother. "All I hear from him is Dean this and Dean that. It was about time we met."
"Oh, you know me, I always gotta be the center of attention," Dean said.
"It helps boost his ego," Castiel said.
"It's amazing how you two ended up working on the same film," Jess said. "Sam and I love your movies, Castiel. Anytime we're in a funk or something, we put them on and digress. They work like a charm."
"I hope Coffee Dates doesn't disappoint you, then," Cas said. "I'm sure you have high expectations."
"I'm not worried," Jess said. Her smile was genuine. Dean caught Sam staring at her, and the look in his eyes spoke a thousand words.
They continued discussing films and the industry as they ate. Jess was very knowledgeable in many areas. In some ways, she reminded Dean of Sam. Ever since Sam started reading, he remembered little random facts, and he never forgot them. His younger brother was a walking encyclopedia. And Jess was a lot like that, spilling facts about every little thing.
Most people found that annoying, but Dean had grown up with Sam. He'd not only gotten used to it, but he also enjoyed it.
Cas seemed to agree with him. His face lit up with all the information he was receiving.
"I've had a great time," Jess said.
"We should get going," Sam said. "Jess and I are meeting up with her friends in twenty minutes."
"Am I still invited to visit the set tomorrow?" Jess wondered.
"Absolutely," Cas said.
"We'll give you a full tour," Dean said.
Sam and Jess left after a long string of goodbyes.
Dean turned to Cas. "We have the place to ourselves again."
"Indeed, we do," Cas said.
"Should we go?"
"Yes, I think we should."
They rushed out of the restaurant, and then hopped into the Impala, breathless. They listened to Elvis Presley on the drive back home, and sang Burning Love together. Who would have thought that a simple car ride could be this incredible?
When they got home, Dean pushed Castiel against the door and kissed him. Castiel circled his arms around Dean's waist and gripped his back. Dean dug his fingers in the waistband of Castiel's pants and pulled him closer. Cas parted his lips and his tongue did wonderful things in Dean's mouth. Dean arched his back and groaned as their erections pressed together.
"Why do you feel so good?" Cas whispered. He bit Dean's lower lip, and it made Dean tremble.
"Why do you sound surprised?" Dean asked. He took his time to kiss the length of Castiel's neck, softly.
Castiel breathed unevenly. "I don't want to ruin what we have."
"Nothing will be ruined," Dean promised. He knew he couldn't assure this, but he couldn't think straight when Castiel's hands were roaming inside his shirt. Just his touch alone was enough to make Dean lose clarity.
"You're my favorite person," Cas said, and suddenly he was holding Dean's face in his hands. "I hope you know that."
Dean smiled and leaned into the touch. "You're mine, too."
Castiel wasn't much shorter than Dean, but he stood on his toes and whispered into Dean's ear, "Take me to your bed."
"Your wish is my command," Dean said. Before he thought better of it, he hefted Cas in his arms. Cas wrapped his legs around Dean and kissed him, hard. Dean walked toward his bedroom, but he bumped into the walls. Cas laughed and pulled back.
"Maybe I should walk," Cas said.
Dean shook his head, gripping his arms tightly around Castiel. He had a good hold of him. "This is harder than it looks."
Castiel kissed the tip of Dean's nose. "Dean Winchester, you're amazing, and strong."
"Okay, Castiel Novak."
Castiel laughed again. "I don't think either one of us know how to take a compliment."
Dean could almost cry out in victory when he made it to his room. He brought Cas down to the bed and crawled over him. Cas pulled up Dean's shirt and tossed it aside. At first, Dean attempted to unbutton Castiel's shirt with his teeth, but when that went totally wrong, he just used his hands. "How did that guy do it in the movie?"
"Don't believe everything you see in television," Cas said, undoing his pants.
"I'm just saying, we're wasting precious time with these buttons," Dean said, and then he finally removed Cas's shirt.
Castiel rolled his eyes. "Why don't you lecture me about my clothing after we do this?"
Dean reached his nightstand and grabbed his condoms and lube. By that time, Castiel was completely naked, while Dean still wore his pants. "How did you do that?"
"Television magic," Cas said.
Dean laughed. He kissed Castiel chastely, now that the rush was over. He held Castiel's hard cock in his hand and stroked it as he continued kissing him. Dean dug his fingers in Castiel's hair with his free hand.
Castiel moaned and Dean echoed the sound. His pants were really tight, but he wanted to taste more of Castiel before he could take care of himself. He kissed Castiel's chest, and he sucked on a nipple. Castiel panted and his fingernails dug into Dean's shoulders. "Dean," he breathed.
Dean moved lower. He removed his hand and took Castiel's leaking cock into his mouth. He looked up in time to witness the way Castiel's face crumbled, and his eyes shut. Cas licked his lips, savoring the moment. Dean would have smiled if he could.
"Dean, Dean, I want—" Castiel gasped.
Dean pulled back, releasing Castiel's throbbing cock. "Tell me."
"I want you in me," Cas rasped.
Dean was more than happy to obey. His last two layers of clothing were gone in record time. His cock was painfully hard. Dean nearly yelped when Castiel's hands enveloped him. Dean spread lube on his fingers and leaned over Cas again. He kissed him and looked into his eyes.
Castiel nodded before kissing him again.
Dean placed his index finger into Castiel's opening. Castiel's body tensed under him, but them he relaxed, allowing Dean to move his finger. "How you doing, baby?" Dean didn't even blink at the sudden nickname. He was too preoccupied by other things.
"I want more," Cas said. His voice was deep and commanding. It sent chills up Dean's spine. Castiel's hand continued stroking Dean to the point that he was worried he would come before he could even be inside him. Dean pushed another finger in, trying to loosen the entrance. Another moment passed before Castiel said, "I want you, Dean. Come inside me."
"Dear lord," Dean gasped. This whole commanding thing was very suiting on Castiel. "I'm getting hard just by the sound of your voice."
Cas smirked. "Now, Dean."
Dean put a condom on, slithered it with lube and settled once more atop Castiel. The moment he entered, just barely, Dean bit his lip. He watched Castiel's expression, making sure he wasn't hurting him. Cas closed his eyes. Dean buried himself in deeper until he was completely inside him. Cas winced.
"Cas, are you okay?"
"I'm okay," Cas said, opening his eyes. "I want you to move."
Dean wrapped a hand under Castiel's waist and started to thrust. Dean exhaled in relief, and Castiel moaned. "You should see your hair right now," Dean whispered.
Castiel touched a hand to Dean's cheek. "I'd rather see you."
Dean kissed Cas's hand, closing his eyes. He moved slowly at first, and then—at Castiel's request—he moved faster. Dean nuzzled his face in Castiel's neck while Cas wrapped his arms tightly around him.
Don't ever let me go, Dean thought. That thought alone should have terrified Dean, but up until this moment, it hadn't occurred to Dean that he might actually want something serious with Castiel. This wouldn't be enough. Dean didn't just want one night with Castiel. He wanted every night with him. He wanted to continue sharing every meal with him. Dean wanted to kiss him in public without worrying about anyone taking a picture.
Dean wanted Cas. It was plain and simple.
"Dean," Cas groaned as he came all over Dean's abdomen. Dean bent down to kiss him again, but instead they bumped heads with each other. They shared a long, glorious laugh.
Dean hit his climax soon after that. He bit into Castiel's shoulder to keep from yelling.
Cas was the brave one who decided to grab a towel to clean up after themselves. He disposed of the towel and returned to bed. They both lied on their side and shared the same blanket.
Dean looked at him with heavy-lidded eyes. "You are so beautiful. I hope you're not a mirage in the desert."
Castiel scooted closer to Dean and draped an arm over Dean's waist. "If I am, then you are, too. Perhaps we're both roaming the desert right this second."
"I'll stick it out if I get to keep you," Dean said. He was so sleepy, and he could tell Cas was too. But they were both too stubborn to fall asleep yet. Dean wanted to talk to him. He wanted to just lie beside Cas and talk to him all night long.
"Dean?"
"Hmm?"
"In the morning, I'll be cleaning your room."
Dean chuckled, and then yawned. "It's not that bad."
"Are you kidding? I'm afraid there are living things crawling under the piles of clothes."
"Nonsense," Dean mumbled.
Castiel traced Dean's lips with his fingertips. "Aren't you worried?"
"About what?" Dean blinked, trying to stay awake.
"That we can't go back to what we were before," Cas said. He was frowning.
"We won't have to," Dean said. I don't want to.
Cas was quiet, and then he said, "Goodnight, Dean."
"'Night." Dean closed his eyes with a smile.