A/N: thankyou to those who reviewed the last chapter! This story's almost at the halfway point now, there's roughly 23/24 chapters in all. Once again please please review! They help alot more than you'd think. Here we are then, chapter eleven. Enjoy!
The first six words were the hardest: 'I have to tell you something,' Draco said, not looking at her but not looking away either. 'There was more than one reason Pansy was sent to impersonate you.'
Luna waited patiently lest she disturb his fleeting moment of honesty and knock him back into the tense state she'd grown used to seeing him in.
'Pansy was in danger. He wanted her dead.' He knew she'd know who he meant. 'My mother devised the plan that it would be her who would switch. It would have been Astoria before she went and got herself killed.' When he next spoke his voice sounded robotic, it reminded Luna of when she'd spoken to Harry just after his godfather had been killed. 'Pansy was a good enough alternative, she had the knowledge she would need to blend in. What with knowing pretty much everyone in the order from school or from seeing them fight in battles. So we convinced him to let her live, now that he had a good reason to keep her alive he was easily persuaded by my mother and Severus.'
Luna thought he looked sad, but it could have just been a trick of the light, for when she blinked a second later he had become a robot once again.
'I understand.' She kind of did. 'But why would Voldemort want to kill her?' Draco flinched at the name and Luna noticed, but let it go unmentioned. She knew he still feared his name and could not judge him when it seemed to be the most 'normal' thing to do.
Draco sighed. 'I don't know, and if I'm honest I don't want to. There isn't even one reason that could justify it from where I'm standing.'
It was difficult not to sympathise with Draco at that point. Luna leaned her head a touch closer to were he sat, using his knees as a cushion. 'You care for her a lot don't you?'
His words went unspoken for there was no need to give an answer. They both knew he cared for Pansy. Luna nodded, confirming her own question. 'Yes you seemed to be around each other a lot at school. Did you go out?'
'No. Never.'
It sounded improbable when you'd seen Pansy practically fawn over the boy, and Luna had. As it was she took his word for it.
'So, is that why you won't let me go?' Won't, not can't. Luna thought, for she knew he could if he wanted to. 'Will Pansy still be in danger if she comes back now?'
'Yes.' He replied in answer to both. As the long and tired sun made it's way steadily up into the sky it gave the illusion of a weary animal, using every ounce of strength it had to make the last few steps to the summit of a mountain. It glowed, making their surroundings comes to life slowly but beautifully, like a flower blossoming late.
Draco's face remained turned from her, making it difficult to guess at his thoughts.
He stood and with a swish of his long cloak his back was turned to her as well.
'I'm, sorry.' Luna said quickly, while she still meant it. 'I lied to you back there and I shouldn't have.' She wasn't trying to appeal to his good side in the hopes of gaining his pity, she meant it.
Draco laughed. 'You can hardly be blamed for wanting freedom Luna.' Then he turned to her and added, 'I'd have done the same.'
They looked upon each other: her hair wild, tattered, her clothes torn in places with the edges scuffed and blackened. Him with his hair still neatly ruffled despite the minor explosion he'd just been a part of, and his clothes clean and tidy. They looked at complete opposite sides of the spectrum, but inside Luna's mind was as peaceful as a calmly running stream while Draco's raged with the ferociousness of a tidal wave. His thoughts seemed to crash against Luna as their eyes met. Grey and silver: a discoloured winter moon that couldn't quite shine as white as normal.
Human instinct took over Luna, and she rose to stand behind Draco, the wind gushing about her feet making her dress look wavy and alive. She knew what it felt like to have a manic mind and it seemed to bounce out of Draco, whether he knew it or not: radiating around him making him seem completely under and out of control at the same time. He looked at her with the same expression, even as she lifted her hand to touch his shoulder. It didn't change, and it made her wonder whether he was awake at all. The only reason she knew he was, was that he closed his eyes and placed his own hand on top of hers, which startled her a little.
'We need to go back now.' he said simply, not in a friendly tone, but it was better than coldness. 'We're expected.'
It seemed he had forgotten so Luna spoke up instead, 'We didn't find the papers.' Draco nodded but didn't say anything to show he was worried about the matter.
'I don't want to get you in trouble-', she wondered how would be the right way to settle it. 'What exactly does he want him for, the man I mean?' She would help Draco, which would consequently mean helping Voldemort, but she was willing to so long as she knew what she was helping with. If it was something that could guarantee the victory of dark over light then there was no way Luna would even consider it. Not even if it did save both their skins that day.
'I don't know. No one does. I thought my aunt might, since she's as close to him as any of them probably will get. But if she does she's not talking.'
She had been expecting something to go on, and she needed more information before she made a decision either way. 'Draco do you not know anything at all.'
'No. All I know of the man is that he made one of the most complicated necklaces in the world, it's said to be magical. The last I heard some woman in London bought it, but I wouldn't be surprised if Borgin had got his mitts on it by now. It's the kind of thing he'd go for.' Draco, upon seeing Luna's face light up with the thought of an answer, muttered, 'But the dark lord wouldn't have any use for the necklace. It's the man he really wants to find, and I don't know why.
Perhaps Voldemort simple wanted to go window shopping for rare jewellery. It was a naive thought at best, but it gave Luna the justification she needed. From inside her pocket she pulled out a wrinkled sheet of parchment she'd grabbed just before rescuing Draco from the house, and handed it to him. 'It was in the pile of sheets you summoned. Figured I'd take it with me to the order, if it was important to the dark lord.' Draco looked shocked.
'You don't have to do this you know,' a small part of his voice, the unused part she'd heard once before, sounded as though he didn't really want her too. There was hope for Draco. She could tell he hadn't turned completely, well not yet anyway. He smiled at her.
'It's okay. I don't want you to get in trouble.' Luna took the gentle squeeze he gave her hand as he claimed the parchment as his way of saying 'Thankyou'.
'Can I ask a favour in return?' While he was in a good mood, she would make the moment last.
'Can we walk for a little while longer before you take me back, I don't want to say goodbye to the day yet. It's very dark in that dungeon.'
Draco looked at her, and then at the sun, as if reading her thoughts. After nodding once they set off together Luna's smile matching the content bobbing motion of her walk as she bounced ever so slightly alongside Draco. The overall image was one of childlike innocence, and it didn't matter that she no loner was a child because she was happy, and she was innocent. Lost inside the wide expanse of the world but completely certain of who she was and where she was going. Draco both admired this about her and envied her for it. He would never tell her though.
There was a slope to the field and they began to walk upwards. It was like walking towards heaven as the sun shone right before them, their shadows short behind them as it reached midday.
Luna felt happy. And it was with less heartache than she expected that herself and Draco reached the end of their walk and he turned to her, holding his arm out. There was still no free will in the matter, but the fact that he let her take his arm and not snatch it from her, was respectful. Luna was grateful to him for that small allowance of freedom.
When they arrived at the manor Draco did not remove his arm from Luna's hold straight away, he let her adjust herself for a moment and then slowly began the walk down his garden path. Luna followed close behind. She couldn't keep her eyes from flicking back and forth between the parchment (her father's research) and Draco's back. There was a nagging feeling warning her of something she would regret, but at the time it felt like the right thing to do, and therefore it was. Luna would not judge herself. She'd done the right thing and would face whatever that brought her way. Draco's mother was sat in an armchair as they entered the front hall. Draco gave Luna a nudge over to her and Luna couldn't quite make out what he'd mouthed to Narcissa before he walked down the corridor with a strong and determined stride: he would no doubt be going to tell the dark lord of his success.
'Come with me Luna.' Narcissa spoke whilst she gestured to a door off the right of where they had entered. 'It's okay.'
Together they ascended a dark, spiralling staircase, whose only light source was the tiny porthole shaped windows that followed them up to what felt like the second floor of the manor. Narcissa's hair shone brightly in the rare moment of light and the fine material of her dress practically sparkled. For a death eater's wife Narcissa was really quite beautiful.
She opened a door leading away from the staircase and led Luna through it into brightness.
There were so many doors, each identical and Luna supposed this was the servants quarters, or spare guest rooms as the space between each door suggested there wasn't all that much room in each room. The contradiction made her laugh, but Narcissa didn't seem to notice.
'Thank you Luna.' It was a strange thing to hear to say the least, and Luna wasn't expecting it. She had assumed it was an order that she helped and so it felt strange to be thanked for doing so. Then again so far Narcissa had given Luna the impression she was not like the majority of the people that lived in the house anyway.
There was something about the décor up here that struck Luna as odd: whereas the rest of the house followed an elegant pattern of style, either with dark brooding walls or crisp white ceilings, this floor seemed a little more homely, there was nothing fancy about the cream carpet that nuzzled her feet or the pastel shaded lamps hanging from the ceilings. In a way, it reminded her lot of the burrow. It was hardly extravagant but it had a humble feel, unlike everywhere else in the manor in which it seemed the decorator had intended everything to portray just how wealthy the family living there was.
It was one of the last doors on the left that they stopped at, Narcissa laying a hand on the handle while Luna grew curious as to why they were here. 'You've spent enough time down there now. This is my house and I at least like to show welcome; since you've proven you're not going to be trouble for us I feel there's no harm in this.' Narcissa spoke, opening the door. Inside was a clean looking room. It had a bed and a wardrobe, but not much else, as Luna would have thought. However what she saw facing her made her heart spring to attention. A long window crossed the far wall with sheer white hangings on either side. Through it, she could make out a faint curve of a river somewhere in the distance, a lovely green Hazel tree and the sinking sun even further beyond the pair of them. She would never take a view like that for granted again.
'So long as you comply with anything asked of you, and make no trouble for anyone, this room is yours.' The older witch said, Luna noticed a resemblance. Narcissa too could fall into a monotone sort of voice. Luna wondered if someone somewhere was typing out Narcissa's script as she spoke it, leaving stage directions unmentioned so all she could do was read the words wrote. Both of them showed signs of having little control over their lives and it made Luna sad to think it could very well be true.
'Thankyou,' Luna whispered, afraid Narcissa would change her mind at any moment. She did not. She did, however, move closer to Luna and looked upon her like a mother would if their child came in from playing in the mud.
'You've lost more weight.' She said impatiently, as if it was supposed to be Luna's fault.
'It doesn't matter, it's not like I'm entering a beauty competition.' Luna laughed half-heartedly.
'I'll bring you up some lunch,' she smiled as she left Luna alone.
Now left to her own devices Luna wondered what the limits of this newfound independence would be, she didn't have to wonder long. As she heard Narcissa walk away, to where she knew the hidden staircase waited, she heard the unmistakable clunk of a locking door. So much for trust, she thought.
It was like an extension of her former prison though much more comfortable. She decided to lie on the bed for a while, her muscles sensed a chance to relax and the soft mattress seemed to smother them with love. A spider crawled along the ceiling, making circles around himself when he came to the corner. She watched him construct his makeshift indoor home for a while, nodding at him as he displayed his web skills.
'I suppose it must be nice to be you, setting up home whenever you need one.' He paid her no attention, of course she had hardly expected for him to turn around and begin chatting, but continued on for a while in his one little world.
A popping sound to her right made her aware that a plate of cheese and bread had appeared on a small table she hadn't really noticed until then. Another pop and there was a bowl of what looked and smelled like pea soup. Luna's stomach took one quick glance at the food and it rumbled loudly, tickling her into a suppressed giggle.
She ate it hungrily and then, stuck for what to do afterwards, chose to return to her earlier spot by the window. It must be growing near evening for purple dashes were starting to strike across the sky, fading behind the few clouds that had materialised. A black bird, too far away to make out what it was, had taken off for its destination, and Luna watched as it shrunk from looking like a blot of ink of a page to a smallish full-stop and eventually the smallest dot a quill could make.
She wondered then of her friends, of how they were getting along on their quest to destroy Voldemort, and now in addition to her thought's usual agenda she spared a moment for Pansy, wondering if she was as scared as Luna. Did she know she was marked for death? Luna hoped not, otherwise she would be little more than a prisoner herself.
She couldn't help the curiosity she felt. There was more to be told, more to learn, and Luna didn't know whether she could only apply that to herself or Draco as well. Because though she did believe him, the way he had spoken to her earlier had been indifferent, maybe a little too indifferent. Voldemort was not a man she could imagine putting an awful lot of trust into his followers, even those belonging to his most inner circle. She imagined Bellatrix would be his first Lieutenant, as it were. So she was her best chance of finding out more, but also the unlikeliest.
Then there was Draco, whom she now seemed to be on relatively okay terms with. He was her best chance to escape, but again now that she knew why he was so careful regarding her, she figured he'd be the unlikeliest to help her.
It was growing near dark when Luna heard the bang. It had come from below as her floorboards appeared to shake a little. Then there was screaming, and if she wiggled her ear as close to the floor as she could then the words were almost audible. It was a woman shrieking painfully loud, and a man: although from his growling, rough accent he sounded more like an animal. Bellatrix and Greyback Luna supposed. She was suddenly thankful for the few inches of wood that separated them.
'NOT THE SAME!' Bellatrix yelled, and Luna pictured her throwing her arms madly around as she huffed and puffed her words out.
The growl retorted something that sounded like 'MAD' but it could have easily been anything that rhymed with it, bad, sad, glad and such, for his voice drawled them out like saliva from the jaw of a beast.
'IT'S NOT RIGHT!' she shrieked, upon which more crashing ensued. Luna's awareness was wild with a passion. She listened, waiting for them to say more but eventually the voices faded away and with them went the bangs that had made Luna think they were fighting.
Not more than a minute later the voices sounded again, this time coming from below her window and as she carefully peeked over the edge of the windowsill, what Luna saw made her breath catch in between her throat and her lungs, waiting.
Out on the patch of lawn that wasn't obscured by trees, she saw Remus Lupin. His entire body convulsed madly while Bellatrix ran for cover behind a nearby tree, where she seemed to be crying or breathing very heavily.
'It's just a bit of sport Bella!' Luna heard Greyback jeer from somewhere out of sight.
'It's not right, if you kill him you'll have the Dark Lord to answer to!' she sounded terrified at the thought.
Remus shook, and from the utmost pain in his screams Luna knew he was being tortured. 'Now then Lupin, are you going to do what you should have done weeks ago.'
From the way he panted, curled on his side, Luna had never seen Remus look so utterly defeated, but there was no mistaking the strength and courage the tore out of him as he roared 'Never!'
'What- A- Pity.' Greyback did not sound disheartened in the slightest. He emphasised every word giving them more meaning than Luna could guess at.
'Our army numbers are dwindling Remus and you refuse to turn those we've asked you to.' He moved into the light of twilight as he blocked Luna's view of Lupin, standing over him with power; a wolf ready to pounce.
Luna couldn't stop the whimper that escaped her throat as she watched powerless. Bellatrix too looked beyond fearful now, as she pressed her body so tightly into the tree it was like she was trying to melt herself in with it.
Greyback lowered his wand, tucking it into his robes. He bent down to Remus, so close that Luna didn't stand a chance of hearing what he said.
Remus cried in agony, though it seemed no spell had been used.
Luna wanted to cry out, to tell him she was there, to tell him she wanted to help. But the thoughts of Pansy overruled her judgement, leaving her with no more options; she merely bit her tongue and waited.
'Let him go Greyback.' Bellatrix seemed to have gained some composure back. 'He knows the consequences of disobeying orders twice.' She walked out from behind her safe spot, holding her head high in an attempt to show she was not afraid.
'I want that lot turned Remus.' He then sighed, rolling his head downwards. 'I know you. You wouldn't want me turning your precious fiancé now, would you?'
Remus said nothing back.
Greyback dragged him to his feet, putting a mocking arm on his shoulder. 'You bring us the last of the order as wolves, with the exception of Potter, or I'll bite your precious Nyphadora's neck in half.'
Luna could have cried. She could hardly believe it.
'Go on Remus.' He said, motioning him over to the gate. 'I'll be seeing you soon.'
Remus walked away, stumbling along beyond the front gate and out into the quickly descending night.
She heard the other two enter the manor and waited, though no more sound was to be heard that night.
Sitting back down on the bed, half shaking from shock and half from fear for her dear friend, Luna let the tears roll down her cheeks. She felt as helpless as a person watching an execution, knowing deep down there wasn't anything she could do. She trusted Remus to do the right thing, and wondered what that would mean. Probably that she might never see him and Tonks again. It was like being lost in a battle where no one even knew she existed.
The night that followed was long and mostly sleepless. And as the moon handed over to the dawn, the trace of newly shed tears still shone on the cheeks of Luna's face.