Hard To Get Back
Chapter 11
Somewhere We're Still Friends

AN: Thanks for the reviews I own nothing. Glad you all enjoyed the last two chapters, and this is the next to last chapter in NY then it is back to VA.

JJ had gone to the surveillance place to be with Penelope instead of going back to the office; before she'd left she'd heard that Derek had taken off to see where the ambulance was. When she got the the building Pen was coming out of it, "Where you going?" JJ asked her.

"I gotta get Derek, he sorta had what he was driving blow up on him," Pen said, "He's okay, probably got few scraps from jumping out the thing, but…"

"Get in, I'll drive, I got nothing else to do and neither one you need to be driving right now," JJ said knowing by the tears on her friend's face that she was emotional thinking that Derek could have died.

"Thanks, Jayje," Penelope said going to the passenger side to get in the SUV before they took off to the open field where Pen had told Derek to go with the ambulance.

Morgan was leaning against one the trees, he knew if he sat down he wasn't going to be getting back up right now the way he felt. His body was aching all over, the earlier fight with Hotch and then jumping out the ambulance going almost ninety miles per hour. The gash on his upper arm had stopped pouring the blood, it was still bleeding, but only slightly now he'd taken his shirt off after he tossed his vest down on the ground and wiped the blood way using his shirt.

His knee was on fire at the moment and he was putting more weight on the other leg. When he'd jumped out he'd hit the ground hard tucking and rolling away sitting up, but the impact had jammed his knee and it was throbbing, he was glad they had one those whorl pool tubs in the bathroom at their hotel, he was going to be in that soon as he got checked out. Pen was going to make him get checked out so might as well face that now.

Derek looked up with smile seeing one the FBI's Black SUV's coming towards him stopping before the door opened. He was going to say something but before he could Penelope hugged him wrapping her arms around his neck holding him to her.

"Please never do that again," she said holding onto him like he was going to disappear other wise.

"I will do my best to never scare you like that again," Derek said knowing he couldn't promise her that even with their line of work they never knew and it was possible for it to have gone the other way.

"I'll take that," Pen said pulling back with tears on her face before she kissed him showing him in that kiss what words could never tell him.

Derek kissed her back with just as much love he knew that he could have died, but he hadn't thought, he'd wanted to protect his family and half of that family had been in the hospital with him. "I love you, baby girl and I'm here, I'm not going anywhere," he said holding her to him when he'd pulled away for air.

"Not to interrupt you two, but can we get back to the field office and away from here?" JJ asked them looking toward where the ambulance was still on fire the flames rising to the sky from how hot it was burning.

"Yeah, but I think I'm in need couple stitches so maybe the hospital to get checked out," Derek said.

Pen pulled away just now noticing that he had wasn't wearing a shirt now, she had been desperate to feel him close and to know that he was standing there that she hadn't notice the lack of a shirt.

"You're bleeding," she said looking at his arm which had blood running down it again.

"I'm fine, I scrapped it on the side the door when I jumped out, but I'm fine baby girl, I'm still in once piece," Derek said.

"Still you're going to get checked out," JJ said, "Come on, everybody is still there anyway," she replied as they went to the SUV.

"You're limping," Pen said.

"You try hitting the ground when you jump out of a moving vehicle going almost ninety and see what hurts on you, princess," Derek said with smile to her not wanting her to know how much it really hurt at the moment.

"The damn fight Hotch started today really didn't help either," JJ said, "Need some help?" she asked.

"I can do this, and you are not about to try and help me with you being pregnant don't give a damn if you get pissed at me for that, but no way," Derek said.

"Yeah he wouldn't let me lift anything when I was pregnant with the twins, he refused to let me carry my own damn bag, now that was just pushing it," Penelope said, "But I loved it just the same," she replied.

"You had left already and you weren't there Pen, but Will is flying back tonight to New Orleans, he's quieting his job and moving here," JJ said.

"That's wonderful JJ," Penelope said before she slid in the back seat with Derek. He'd pulled himself up without help using the handles instead.

"I should have known he wouldn't stay that far away from you," Derek said, "He ever hurts you, you'd better tell me, I'll kick his ass for you, I'm not letting you and my future nephew or niece get hurt," he said.

"Well thank you, but I think I can handle myself," JJ said.

"I know you can after yesterday, but still, I find out he's hurt you I will kick his ass, gotta look out for my little sister," Derek said with smile.

Penelope moved closer to him before JJ turned around going back out the field and towards the hospital. Derek wrapped his arm around her once he'd gotten his seatbelt on pulling her as close as they could get at the moment. He wanted to be closer and at home with the kids at the moment but that would be few more hours probably tomorrow since he wasn't leaving till he got at least few hours of sleep, because he needed it.

Hotch had gone back upstairs after the bomber had slit his throat after Derek had taken off in the ambulance, once the signal had come back up he knew that the ambulance had gone up, he hadn't heard from Penelope or Derek to see if he was okay, he asked Rossi to find out for him, he did care if Derek lived or died and he hoped he'd gotten out the ambulance before it had gone up.

Soon as he got up the stairs he took off to find where Kate was at, now that it was over he could check on her. When he got to the door he didn't expect to see two men cleaning up all the blood on the floor. He'd expected to see surgeons and a closed door.

"What's going on?" he asked looking at the two men that looked up at him hesitant to say anything.

The surgeon looked over at Hotch with a saddened expression, "I'm sorry, we did everything we could," he said, "She didn't feel anything when she went, she never woke up after you got her here," he replied.

Hotch looked over at the table as the doctor and two other men left the room leaving him there with Kate's body. He walked over to the table squeezing her hand which had fallen out from under the sheet before putting it back. He couldn't believe that she was gone, he had hoped that she would pull through she didn't deserve this, to die so young. Hotch closed his eyes before walking out of the room going to where Rossi and them where waiting on him.

"Soon as you have that arm looked at you can go and check on them," Penelope said for the second time to Derek who wanted to go and find Hotch and Kate. She knew that even if they pretty much hated each other right now that Derek still cared and he had to make sure that they were okay for his self.

"I just need to clean it up, it doesn't need stitches," Derek said.

JJ came into the room looking at the both of them, "I just talked to Emily, Kate didn't make it," she said, "I know she was a bitch, but its okay to want to cry right now right?" she asked looking at Derek and Pen.

Derek got off the table he'd been sitting on and went out the room he didn't care how much his knee was hurting or how much hell had happened between him and Hotch in the last few days he had to make sure he was okay for himself.

"Derek," Penelope said.

"Let him go, maybe Hotch and him can work things out," JJ said, "Damn I hate being hormonal," she said.

"If they don't kill each other first over this," Penelope said, but she stayed with JJ instead not wanting to go chasing after Derek, she knew he was okay and still alive. She never wanted to know if something had been between Kate and Hotch, but she did feel bad for her friend he'd lost somebody that even though she'd been horrible to them had been a friend to him.

Hotch was sitting outside on one the benches at the moment he'd needed air, at the moment he couldn't that great out his ear. He was also really messing Haley right now, she could always make things better when he was having a day like today. He was pretty sure that nobody on the team was going to come looking for him, they'd made it clear that they hated him right now.

It had taken getting sent flying halfway across the road by the damn bomb to realize what he'd really been doing in the last few days. He'd been trying to protect Kate from loosing her job, and in that process he'd lost his friends and any friendship or trust that Derek had for him had gone.

"I never wanted it to end like this," Derek said, "I didn't want her to die," he said.

Hotch heard something looking up finding Derek standing there or rather leaning against the columns. "Why the hell are you even talking to me?" he asked.

"I might want to punch the shit out you for kicking my ass earlier, but somewhere between the hell of the last three days I gotta believe we're still friends other wise I got no reason to stay at the BAU any more," Derek said shifting before he sat down on the other bench.

"So now that she's dead you want her job?" Hotch asked.

"Hell no, I fucking said I didn't want her damn job, no matter if she was still alive now, I would never want it, I'd quiet first," Derek said, "Helping you out was enough of a fill for a long time," he said.

"You're not just going to turn down this," Hotch said.

"I came out here to make sure a friend was okay, hoping that maybe we could patch things up, but if you wanna start another fight I'm just going to go back in there, get Penelope and leave go back to the hotel," Derek said.

"I know you didn't want her dead," Hotch said finally after a minute or two, "I just want to be alone," he added.

"Yeah, sure, JJ is inside she said she'd give you ride back when you're ready," Derek said.

"I'm glad you didn't…" Hotch started.

"Yeah, same here, and even if she pushed every damn button, I never wanted to see her die," Derek said before he left going back inside. He knew that this didn't solve all their problems, but for second there they were close again, it wasn't going to last though, and it would be long time before they were really talking like they used to.

TBC

AN: Hope you enjoyed, had to have them talk little bit, and yeah even though couldn't stand her myself, hated her, never wanted her to die, but I wasn't changing the ending.