11

Indecisive

Choosing between two things is not easy, especially if you don't know what you want.

Chapter 11:

I know that I hate her. I am certain of it. However, opening my eyes, just to wake up to the sweet comfort of lying my head on her shoulder on the couch, wasn't a bad feeling. If it had been a few days before, I'm sure I'd push her away as soon as possible, but I wasn't doing a thing now. Why? Probably because I'm comfortable. Yeah, that's it. It has nothing to do with her. This could be any other girl that I'd rest my head upon, it doesn't have to be her. Yes. It's like that.

Why isn't she awake yet? What would she think if she saw me like this? She'd probably be mad. But I'm too tired to deal with things like that right now. After all, I'd just woken up in the middle of the night, and it didn't look like she was going to wake up anytime soon. I'm bored, but I don't want to go get the laptop and move from my spot. I'm thirsty, but I'll endure it till the morning. I feel like doing anything, but moving from this spot was impossible. I wonder why…

And then, cutting away my random thoughts, was the thing I almost forgot.

My departure.

I'd have to leave this house tomorrow, and go back to my original home, with my mother, father, and Wendy—in case she's returned. But I don't think so. Anyhow, I'll have to leave this place behind, and continue my previous lifestyle. I'm afraid to say it, but I've grown accustomed to this kind of life. I've grown used to not having any strict rules like I do at home. It's cool to be your own boss, and I really like it. So, tomorrow everything goes back to normal I guess. Yeah.

It's not like I'll miss her. I'll just miss this house. Yeah, this has nothing to do with Lucy. It's just because I like living the free life.

But, I've been pushing all the finances to her, and she's been paying for everything we ever ate since I came to live here, and when I think about my appetite, she must've paid a lot of money. How did she even have so much? Was she secretly a billionaire?

I just decided that I would pay her back someday, somehow.

"mm…" I turned to look at her, and she stirred in her sleep. Maybe I woke her up? But she calmed down, and smiled. I wonder what nerds like her dream about. Maybe she's dreaming about how awesome I am. Yeah, I'm totally sure that's what she's dreaming about. Oh well, it's not like I can blame her. I mean, come on, I'm irresistible.

"hmm, 3 months…" she mumbled, and I curiously stared at her. Three months? What's going to happen in three months? Oh well, we'd probably stop talking until then. It's not like we're friends. Are we? Yeah, I guess so.

I suddenly heard something ring from my right side, and it turned out to be her phone. She'd just gotten a new message. Well, peeking is not nice, but I don't really care. I didn't know the number, but it was saved as "Bff :3". So, I opened it, to read the message.

[ Hey girl! Sorry I'm writing so late, but I can't sleep! Eek, I can't wait till Wednesday! It's going to be a blast! Remember, I'll wait for you at the Sakura Resort at 12 o'clock sharp! Don't be late! ]

Ah, so they're meeting there at twelve.

Wait a minute, what am I saying? It's not like I'll be going there! Of course not!

I clicked 'mark as unread', and left her phone on the table.

Finally feeling tired after all that, I let my head fall to the support of Lucy's shoulder. I can go sleep on her bed, which is probably a lot more comfortable than this, but I guess this is good too. Staring out her living room window, I nuzzled my head on her shoulder, liking the feeling. I wonder what it would feel like if this wasn't Lucy. What if it was some other girl? Would I do this with my future girlfriend? Or maybe—no. I laughed loudly, but stopped as soon as I realized that I might wake her up.

She looked peaceful like this, so I decided on not pranking her for the night.

"Hey idiot," I whispered quietly, "you fell asleep without seeing the stars…"

"Natsu!" I heard her yell for the hundredth time that morning, as I rolled around on the couch in agony, "I'm serious Natsu! Get up! It's 1:30 and the house is not going to clean itself!" I just groaned loudly, not wanting to move an inch. I fell asleep late last night, and now she wanted me to get up this early? Well, it might be noon or something, but it's not morning until I say it is!

"NATSU!"

"OKAY! I'M UP!"

I sprang up from the couch, ready to leap into action and… take a nap.

"I'll bake you a cake if you help me tidy up!"

"DEAL!"

So, I helped Lucy around the house (not really, I just trailed after her, and told her 'you missed a spot'), completely forgetting about having to leave. She even made me the cake she promised even though I didn't do a thing, and it was soon 5 o'clock. Time to leave.

I packed my backpack with everything I needed, and she led me out the door. We stood in front of her house, enveloped in utter silence.

"So uh," I cleared my throat, "This is the time where you need to say something, right?"

"Yeah," she replied, even though she didn't say a thing after that.

"So uh, it was okay I guess," I scratched my head, "even though I thought for sure that I'd get some chronic nerd disease and die"

Even though I didn't expect her to, she actually laughed. I laughed as well, and the situation became awkward as we quieted down.

"So, um, yeah," she nodded her head, "Try not to get hit by a car on your way back."

"Wish I could say the same to you!" I yelled, already walking away from her.

This was like one of those scenes where girls sleep over, and then tomorrow they're all groggy as they go back home.

To be honest this was the first time I've ever slept over at someone's place. And I'd never imagined it would be anything like this.

And yet somehow, walking along the street, already a good distance away from her house, I get the urge to turn around.

I don't know why, I just do. And when I turn around, I see her, still standing there, watching me walk away from her.

I would've yelled something like "Ooh are you waiting for me to come back? Too bad!" but I didn't.

Instead, my legs start walking forward, and she gives me a confused look as I approach her.

"Uh," I scratch the back of my neck, coughing out the word "Thanks."

But before she gets the chance to reply, I turn around, and quickly walk away from her.

I didn't turn back this time, because she might've still been standing there. And if she was, I might've gone back again.

I guess I just did that because I needed to thank her. Yeah, that's it. It has nothing to do with Lucy. No matter which girl it might have been standing in her place, I'd still have done the same thing. Totally.

"Natsu honey, would you like to eat something?" I heard my mother yell from downstairs, as I aimlessly threw the darts I had in my room. "No mom." I threw myself on the blue bed, staring up at the ceiling. Black and blue furniture in a room with grey walls, and big windows. Ordinary. I looked around, and nothing seemed to catch my attention, as I desperately searched for a way to cure my boredom. Maybe I would've watched tv or played games, but I wasn't in the mood for something like that. Well, I guess it's time to catch up on my sleep. Since I've been feeling tired all day, drifting to sleep in a matter of seconds wasn't hard for me to do.

Jumping up right and sitting on the bed in confusion, it took me a while to remember that I was back in my room. "Ugh, how many centuries have passed?" I groggily asked myself, wiping away the sleep from my eyes. I took my cell phone, and it looked like it was already 10:34. I guess my nap took longer than expected.

Taking out the now crumpled piece of paper form my jeans' pocket, I was glad to have held on to it. I didn't ever think I would use it though, but I still didn't throw it away. Who knew a time like this would actually come? After I carefully entered the digits into my phone, I pressed 'call'.

"Hello?" I heard the all too familiar voice answer from the other side.

"Hi there, could I order three pizzas?" I said in a much deeper voice than usual.

"H-huh? Um, excuse me but I think you've got the wrong number sir." I heard her answer innocently, and I couldn't help but laugh loudly.

"Natsu!?" she yelled in surprise, my laugher giving me in.

"Yeah, you got me!" I yelled in between laughing, and she sighed.

"Why are you calling? Did you forget something?" she asked sincerely, and I rolled my eyes.

"Can't I just call for no reason?" I asked, somewhat annoyed.

"Well if it's you… then no. You don't seem like a person who would do that." And she was right.

So, why did I call? Do I have any ulterior motives? Or is this one of those friendly conversations? To be honest, I don't know the reason myself. I just felt like it. Do I need a reason? No.

"…Natsu? Are you still there?" her voice brought me back to reality.

"Uh yeah, yeah. Listen, I just wanted to talk about my pet fish."

"Pet fish?" She asked curiously.

"Yeah, haven't I told you about it?"

"No, never!" She seemed eager to know about it.

"Well, I've been watching a lot of anime lately, so I named it Haru. It's a goldfish."

"E-Eh?" She screamed, and I wished I could see her face right now.

"But he can only eat the green special fish food, because he's—"

"—very picky. How do you know this Dragneel?" she said, switching back to calling me by my surname.

"Oh I dunno. A little birdie told me!" I laughed, and I could her heavy breathing through the phone. "Geez calm down! It's your fault for just leaving it like that!"

"It was under my pillow!" She screamed.

"Yeah but, it's your fault for letting me live there for a while."

"Well yeah, but…" since she didn't seem to come up with a good reply, she just sighed, and gave up. "So, is this why you called? To tell me that you peaked at my diary?"

"Nah." I said, looking out of the window. "Hey, what are you doing right now?"

"I'm staring at the stars." She mumbled.

"Me too." I said, as I got up to open the window with my free hand. "Hey, what do you do when the sky is cloudy?"

"I imagine them… but they're never as beautiful as the real ones." She answered, and she sounded somewhat sleepy.

"Did your parents come back?" I asked, out of questions.

"You're just bored so you're asking me anything you can think of." She laughed, and I did as well.

"That's true…" I continued staring out of the window, "Well, it's time to call it a night. You'd better go to bed right away. We wouldn't want you to oversleep and miss your precious study time now, would we?"

"Ugh, you're such a jerk!" She yelled, angrily.

"But I'm a hot jerk."

"Whatever." Her voice was monotone, and I could practically see her rolling her eyes.

"Well, good night." I shouted and clicked 'end call' before she even got the chance to say anything.

It felt like I'd have to say something else after that, so I panicked and ended the call. But thinking back on it now, why did I even call her in the first place? I didn't forget a thing, and it's not like I was thinking about her…

I just probably wanted to tease her some more, because she was fun to tease and make fun of.

I turned off the light, and covered myself with the blankets. But, no matter how much I tried, it looked like I wouldn't be falling asleep so easily. And just in case, I set my alarm clock to 11 am tomorrow, because I felt like going for a swim at the nearest resort… Also... how did she even react when she saw me sleeping like that?

I pulled the blankets over my head, trying to chase away the thoughts of that nerd I hate so much.

What I'm feeling is hatred right? A strong passionate hatred for that stupid herd.

Closing my eyes, and turning away from the starry sky, I tried to fall asleep by force.

What is this?

I think I really got some disease from her.

A/N: oooh Natsu~! It seems like you've got some inner problems with yourself?

Aaah~ Young love ^w^

Sorry for updating this late, but a lot of things turned up, and I promise I'll try to update sooner next time. Please enjoy this chapter I just wrote, and remember to leave a review if you liked it. It means the world to me !

I love all of you guys so much!

~ With Keys, Through Flames! Aye! ~

End of Chapter 11.