A/N: I wanna play a game. No, not like that. Heheh... Try and find all the Brandon Rogers references in this chapter. I'm convinced Adam and Brandon are the same person. Also, two tumblr text posts. I'll link them all at the end. Short chapter but I felt like cracking some jokes with Brandon/Adam.
Chapter 11
Before he was in this honeymoon phase of their relationship, Adam would of gagged at seeing someone giddily invested in romance. He was awfully hypocritical now, considering the way he practically skipped into the hospital about a week and a half later, plastic bag in hand.
The staff at the hospital recognized him now and hardly questioned him when he walked in the front doors. He made a beeline to Lawrence's office, humming under his breath along with the song playing on his headphones. Once he arrived at the familiar door, he tugged a headphone from his ear and stepped inside.
"Larry, I brought your favorite-"
Adam paused, staring wide-eyed at the woman leaning towards him, eyes shimmering and smile beaming. Lawrence was smiling back, but it fell instantly when he turned to the door only to be lifted again, brighter than before.
"Adam!" He greeted cheerfully, and the woman glared at Adam harshly.
Well, well.
Adam glared right back at her, walking over to Lawrence and handing him the bag. "Lunch for you. 6 inches, toasted, Spicy Italian," Adam recalled, all with his eyes on the woman standing by his desk.
The desk Lawrence fucked me on just last week, but I bet you don't know that, skank.
Adam quirked a smile at her. "Since Larry is on break now, I'm sure any discussions about work can wait, can't they?" Lawrence seemed not to notice the tension, and he looked between Adam and his coworker.
"Ah, yeah, if you wouldn't mind, Lisa," Lawrence flashed a polite smile at her. "We can continue our discussion shortly."
"Of course, Dr. Gordon," Lisa nodded curtly, then shot a glare at Adam once again, tossing her black hair over her shoulder as she strut out of the office.
"What a bitch," Adam hissed, and Lawrence looked at him with surprise in his eyes. "She was giving you this look and I wanted to throw her off a building."
"You catch on quickly," Lawrence said, and Adam looked at him with slight shock and confusion. Lawrence cleared his throat. "We had a one-night stand before. She keeps trying to have us hook up again."
"I see," Adam narrowed his eyes slightly. He didn't think much on Lawrence cheating on his wife, but he didn't trust the woman at all. "She better keep her distance."
"Unfortunately, it's hard when I have to work with her daily," Lawrence sighed, moving to sit down and eat his sandwich. "I have to be friendly and professional, but it's annoying to have to deal with her advances…"
Adam didn't respond to that. Instead, he sat down and pulled out his own sandwich, listening to Lawrence talk about his work day so far.
—
"Welcome to Chance in Counter!"
Amanda welcomed a customer, and then continued cleaning the table tops. She always did the welcome, since Adam couldn't be relied on, since he would rather shoot himself in the foot than sound so painfully cheerful.
Adam handed another customer their drink, then turned to the person approaching the counter. "May I take your order?" Adam asked, the looked up at their face. Immediately, he gagged. "Oh, it's you."
The woman from Lawrence's office gave him a confused face, then narrowed her eyes. "Excuse me?"
Adam smiled a bit. This just got incredibly interesting. "What would you like to drink, ma'am?" He asked tensely. She gave him another look, but seemed too tired to argue. She must be on her way to work, too.
"Americano, 12 ounces," she said curtly. Adam tapped the order in the register and took her payment, then went to make the drink.
It wasn't going to be good. He screwed up the order on purpose and gave it to her, watching as she took a sip. Her eyes bugged and she pulled it away instantly, gagging slightly, to Adam's delight.
"How did you get this coffee to taste like piss?" She snapped, narrowing her eyes angrily at him, probably furious that she wasted her money on it.
"I used your panties as a goddamn filter," Adam retorted back at her, and her jaw dropped, looking down at the coffee before she threw it in the trash and stormed out. Adam grinned triumphantly, and he could physically feel Amanda's glare into the side of his head.
He didn't regret his comment in the slightest.
—
"So this guy ordered a hazelnut latte, right," Adam explained to his best friend Scott, nearing the end of his shift.
"Right," Scott nodded.
"He came back a few minutes later, nearly in tears, asking if this drink would make his date think he's gay," Adam continued with a deadpan expression. "I mean, what the fuck does that even mean? Since when are drinks gay?" Scott shrugged, and Adam continued to rant. "People tell me all the time that coffee has gender. 'That's a Lady coffee,' people try to say. It's fucking bean water."
"I can't believe I'm actually considering that statement, but," Scott tapped his fingers on the counter. "Maybe they're actually telling you that their coffee has an important status. It's like calling someone 'Lady Smith' rather than Ms. Smith. 'Lady Coffee.'"
"Oh shit," Adam rolled his eyes, "I was in the presence of bean water royalty. Oh fuck, I must have looked like such a rube. Such a fool…"
Scott snorted at his comments and sipped at his iced house brew. "You're more sour than usual," he observed Adam's exasperated movements. A customer came in before Adam could answer him, ordering an espresso frantically and digging through his bag.
"That'll be $3.76, please," Adam read out flatly, and the customer quite literally threw a handful of change onto the counter. Adam looked down at the coins, unimpressed, and glared at the customer. "Are you trying to give me a fucking seizure?"
The customer didn't seem to answer him. Adam rolled his eyes and made the espresso, leaving the change sprawled out on the counter. He handed the drink to the man before even trying to count the money. "Just go," Adam advised, and the man nodded, rushing out of the cafe immediately.
"The fuck…?" Scott raised an eyebrow and Adam shrugged. Such encounters were not uncommon, apparently. Scott continued drinking his coffee when a woman stumbled inside with three toddlers clinging to her legs.
"Thanks for bringing your fucking kids," Adam grumbled, probably loud enough for her to hear. Scott nearly did a spittake, taking a mental note to come and watch Adam bitch more often. The lady ordered a coffee and the kids picked out brownies from the pastry section. Unamused and unfazed, Adam glanced at the brownies in the display case.
"Y'know, you shouldn't eat those," Adam gave the kids a distant look. "They're three months past the date. They'll make you see through time…" The kids looked somehow intrigued, and the mother seemed to not even notice the comment, for she was too busy digging through her overly-sized purse to notice.
"We wanna see through time!" The little girl wailed, so Adam sighed and pulled out the crusty brownies, giving them to the kids on a plate.
"Pretty much any of the food we carry will give you a grand mal seizure," Adam said again, watching as they stuffed their faces with the stale brownies. Disinterested once again, he took the payment from the mother and watched as the kids gagged, trailing after their mother sickly and unevenly as they left the cafe. Adam turned to Scott, death in his eyes.
"Did you know," he started on another story, "That once, a guy called and ordered 12 baked cookies, and we had to put them in the oven separately, because our oven is shitty as hell right? As soon as I got them all packed up, he was like, 'No… no no no… no, absolutely not,' and then he put his phone up to his ear and left. And yet he… he already paid?"
"Why do weird people constantly find this place?" Scott questioned, and Adam ran his hands through his hair in aggravation.
"Swear to god, I'm gonna set myself on fire," Adam yelled out into the cafe, causing a few customers to glance at him and Scott to laugh.
—
"Are… are you alright?" Lawrence asked, concerned when Adam quite literally slammed the door behind him upon arriving at Lawrence's apartment.
"How would you feel," Adam kicked off his shoes, "If you had to deal with people ordering multiple drinks, taking a sip, and then instantly tossing them into the garbage right in front of you?"
"That's wasteful," Lawrence commented, and Adam looked at him with something akin to fire in his eyes.
"I'm going to hang myself," Adam hissed. "I can't fucking deal with the man who keeps coming in and setting up his laptop and speakers in the bathroom. He just- he comes out once in a while to order more food but then he inevitably returns to the bathroom. It's fucking awkward for everyone. And then there's the fucker who comes every day at exactly 11:42 and orders a cup of water with 15 ice cubes in it, specifically."
"Have you ever tried giving him less than that?" Lawrence suggested, setting his bag on the chair by the kitchen table.
"He will literally look at the cup and know, just from looking," Adam snorted. "The guy's a fucking creep. Oh, and then there's that chick who orders a cup of just the flavored cool lime syrup. She does it every Thursday, like it's a ritual. Oh, and did I mention how often people come in and order, all at the same time, while incoherently sobbing? It's extremely common. God knows why."
"Did… something happen, besides all of that?" Lawrence asked uneasily, removing his coat and hanging it by the door. Adam fell silent for a moment, looking at the ground.
"No," he said tensely. Lawrence looked at him expectantly.
"You're a terrible liar, Adam." That earned Lawrence a stubborn glance and a strained sigh.
"Your former side-bitch came in the cafe after you went to work," Adam mumbled. "I made her the shittiest coffee and told her I used her panties as a filter."
"Adam…" Lawrence crossed his arms, and Adam knew he was getting a lecture momentarily. He threw up his hands defensively.
"Sorry, but I don't trust her," Adam huffed. "She keeps looking at you like she's gonna eat you and dammit, only I'm allowed to do that." Lawrence smirked at this, and Adam realized his words. He blushed slightly, but fixed Lawrence with a hard look. "What? I'm being serious, you know."
"Really now?" Lawrence challenged, and it was all the encouragement Adam needed to rush forward, pressing their lips together hungrily. Lawrence groaned as Adam pushed his lips open with his tongue, slipping it inside Lawrence's mouth hotly. He rolled his hips against Lawrence's before pulling himself off teasingly, laughing breathily as Lawrence gave him a slightly disappointed, slightly frustrated look. Adam cocked an eyebrow at him.
"Well, don't just stand there if you want to continue," Adam turned around and began to walk away, then gasped in delight when Lawrence came up behind him, pressing Adam's back to his chest. Adam groaned at the feeling of lips on the back of his neck, and he tilted his head down to encourage the feeling.
"Guess you're hungrier than I am…" Adam remarked, leading them to the bedroom with interlocked fingers.
Text posts used:
vixenfur . tumblr . com post/134138328658/lunch-official-nmqttps-lunch-official-i
vixenfur . tumblr . com post/131520828348/lilstinky-starbucks-tales-a-man-would-come-in
Brandon Rogers video quotes used:
watch?v=U5yAmurhS7U
watch?v=BWNy1gcFK2k