Tali didn't wake up until late that night, long after the light of Tikkun had said its goodbyes to the skies and deserts of Rannoch, promising its return the next morning. It was a promise most of the galactic community had taken for granted before the reaper wars, though it wasn't the promise that would have been broken; the reapers were never out to destroy stars and planets. Nevertheless, most galactic civilizations had a newfound appreciation for such small facts of life.
The girl stirred a bit under Shepard's arm. The rhythmic thumping of his heart had held steady through her dreams and had kept watch over Tali as she transitioned slowly back into reality. She sighed and pressed her ear closer to his chest.
"I dreamed of this," Tali said softly.
"Sleep well?" Shepard replied, his tone soft and gentle, but alert.
"I haven't slept like that since I was a child… for a couple weeks before I left for my pilgrimage, I practically lived in the rec room on the Rayya. I drove myself to exhaustion just about every day… I slept very well every night."
"It seems like exhausting yourself wouldn't be the best idea before you venture off alone into the galaxy."
"No, it wasn't," Tali replied behind a soft laugh. "I figured that one out very quickly. Even before the geth and Saren came into the picture. But I wasn't really trying to condition myself… more just trying to distract myself from the fact that it was actually about to happen."
"Were you afraid?"
"Yes. Most quarians return successfully. Of those that don't, most of them simply didn't want to. Very few actually die or are injured to the point where they can't complete their pilgrimage. But yes, I was still afraid."
"Well, I would say things worked out for you."
"Yes," Tali replied behind more laughter. "I got caught up in a fight against a scheme to destroy the universe. Those did not seem to be in short supply when I needed them most." The comment even made Shepard laugh. The girl lifted herself up and scooted up towards Shepard's head, wincing slightly at the pain that still bit at her ribcage. She pressed her lips up against his cheek and buried her face in his neck. "How about you?" She asked softly. "You don't seem like you slept."
"Sleep still doesn't come easy," Shepard replied, his eyes trained on a slight imperfection in the paint on the low ceiling.
"Still the catalyst?" She asked. His chest rose and fell emphatically before he responded.
"I don't know that it will ever not be the catalyst. But, for the longest time, it was that, and it was you. The thought of never seeing you again. The thought of being alone in this world. But, I found you, and now we're here. It seems like that freed some of the thought processes in my mind to find other things to keep me awake."
"Like what?"
"I guess, right now? Good people this galaxy lost."
"Ashley… Thane… Mordin… Anderson," Tali said softly, reminding Shepard that she had experienced it all as well.
"Yeah. All people I could have saved."
"Mordin made his own choice, Shepard. I won't let you blame yourself for him. The rest of them, though? I bet if you could ask, they wouldn't blame you either. Ashley? Think of the turmoil this galaxy has gone through since Virmire. All the pain and suffering she didn't have to witness. I bet you she watched on the sidelines, her father right there with her. They were probably sharing a case of beer or a bottle of scotch, cheering you on the entire way, never losing faith in you, never once doubting that you would pull through. They would have had a cookout planned for when it was all over. I bet you she went out of her way to find Thane. I bet you she put her personal feelings aside to track down Mordin. Anderson would be there as well. They weren't sure whether or not to expect you, but they were all still there, celebrating anyway." Shepard smiled at the girl's thoughts.
"Yeah. You're right. I don't know whether I'm upset that I missed it."
"Hah. I'm sure there will be another when the time comes."
"Hopefully no sooner than it has to."
"Shepard, if there is a god—or gods, supernatural beings, whatever—I'm pretty sure they are exhausted of resources to throw at you." He laughed at the comment.
"Seriously, though," Tali said, propping herself up on her elbow. "Our doctors can help. There are physical techniques we could look into. I guess you can't take our medicine, but there are other things we can try. I don't like that you aren't sleeping."
"I spent more time in hospitals than I ever wanted to," Shepard replied as he sat up on the edge of the bed. "I was taking ten different medications that screwed with me in a hundred different ways. I'd rather not get back into that. I can deal with the insomnia."
"It wouldn't necessarily need to be medication, though," Tali said as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "Relaxation techniques. Therapies. Aroma treatments. Some of it silly, maybe, but if it can help, then I want us to try it."
"You think you might catch it, too?"
"No. We aren't at war anymore, but we're still in this together."
"Alright," Shepard replied behind a sigh. "If your doctors have the resources. Injured and unhealthy quarians are worse than my inability to sleep."
"Fair enough." She released her grasp and ran her fingertips gently back and forth across his back. She still enjoyed the feeling of the soft cotton on her skin, a "new" sensation, the realness of which still made her tingle. "We both went through a lot to get here, Shepard. Even after the war. This… this is what we fought for. For ourselves and everyone else out there. For… moments like these. I want to make it count."
"So do I," Shepard said. He leaned back and kissed the girl on the lips. He then stood and headed for the bedroom door. "So, you wanted to see the city?"
"It's… a little late," Tali replied in a questioning tone.
"Yeah, but you've been asleep for twelve hours. Plus, there won't be too many people out right now. Just the few clubs, maybe some at the cafes. It would limit your exposure, and we're supposed to be doing that, aren't we?"
"I guess so. Alright. Let me take a shower," Tali replied, hopping up with a revitalized sense of energy.
"Great. I'll see if Cypher can find us a car."
"Shepard-Commander," came the geth's voice from the living room.
"Just Shepard," he responded, holding up his hands as if to say stop.
"Shepard," Cypher replied. "Rental vehicles are in short supply and may be less sanitary than Tali's contingency for recovery and adaptation will permit. Obtaining a vehicle for VIP transportation would be the safer alternative, but would be difficult to acquire this late at night."
"See what you can do. Perhaps I can add a custom fit vehicle to the list of supplies to ask Kaidan for."
"A vehicle fit with appropriate automated sanitation systems would facilitate ease when transportation is required. I can provide specifications for recommended equipment, should you require them."
"Go ahead and send them to me. I'll put together the request."
"Transmitting data. Done. Shepard, what will be our destination this evening?"
"No specific destination. Just want to take a ride around the city."
"A walking route may facilitate maximum ease in this situation. I can plot a course that will take us past the current major points in Raylin based on number of daily visitors and comments in popular quarian extranet domains."
"Um… alright. That works, too."
"Plotting. Done. Let me know when we are ready to embark."
"I don't suppose you could stay behind…?" Cypher's presence never really bothered Shepard, but the more he was around Tali, the more he wished he could be truly alone with her. During the war, there was the Normandy, and no one was ever truly alone on a war ship. Then there was the hospital, where doctors, Raan, and Cypher were always in an out. Now, they were closer than they had ever been, almost free of all the constraints that kept them from being truly alone, from being able to truly break away from everything the war still held them to.
"I should accompany Tali wherever she goes in order to monitor her condition. This requirement can be eased in a few weeks' time, should she show the resilience we are hoping to see to her surroundings. However, for now, I highly recommend you allow me to accompany you."
"Alright. Tali may not be too thrilled."
"Resistance to constant surveillance is understandable. It is a sacrifice she must make in order to ensure her health, however. Even Admiral Raan advised it. I have judged the Admiral to be among the most significant quarians to Tali."
"I'm not saying you're wrong. I'm just warning you," Shepard said as he started to rummage through cabinets in the kitchen.
"I appreciate the forewarning. Let me know when we are ready to embark."
Back in Saren's days, Shepard would have never thought he'd be having such an involved conversation with a geth. Even after meeting Legion, he couldn't imagine how the communication could advance any further. Now, though, it just seemed like talking to an egotistical scientist who was constantly determined to impress you with his extensive—and superfluous—vocabulary. He couldn't get over how human—or quarian, perhaps—the geth had become since destroying the reaper on Rannoch.
Guess I should be thankful, Shepard thought to himself. We fought for them, too.
"So, where are we headed?" Tali asked after finishing her shower. Shepard's eyes were drawn to her as she entered the living room, and for a moment, all he could do was stare. In the hospital, she only had the simple, white, loose-fitting outfits she was provided with. When the apartment had been arranged, her closet had been stocked with custom-made clothing. This was the first time she had been able to wear any of it. Right now, she wore a close-fitting white top with a few of her signature purple belts around her ribs, and plain black pants, also close-fitting, but not tight. The sleeves on the top came about two-thirds of the way down her arms, and it had a hood, more decorative than functional, that hung freely down her back. All of it was accented with a vibrant new purple shawl—same design as her old one, just with less dirt, shrapnel holes, and scorch marks. Her hair hung freely at her shoulders, though still wet.
"I'm a test line for designers," Tali said after a few moments. "They came and took some measurements while I was in the hospital. The last few weeks or so."
"Like with the houses… buyers' market," Shepard replied, stepping slowly toward her. "I guess there will be more demand for stuff like this, soon."
"Yeah… something I never really thought about. Suit fashion was kind of a thing, but functionality was always the overwhelming priority. Plus, fancy materials required money. Money that was better allocated elsewhere."
"Regardless," Shepard said, running a hand down her arm, "It looks good. You look good."
"Thank you," she said, mustering a tone of sincerity that Shepard had never heard from her before. They both had hopes for the post-war era—hopes that resided in the back of their minds, as they knew the last fight likely wouldn't end well. Those hopes never included anything like this—Shepard never believed he would be able to stare into the quarian's luminous eyes anytime he wanted, and Tali never believed she would be able to feel her fingertips on Shepard's skin whenever she desired. They both shivered with the happiness that came with realizing their dreams had been more than fulfilled.
Tali pulled Shepard into a hug, the two remaining silent for a moment.
"Sorry," she whispered softly, a hint of emotion in her voice. "I just feel I should do this every chance I get."
"Don't be. I'm always happy to comply," Shepard replied.
"We will begin by heading South down the perimeter of the city," Cypher said as soon as the three of them were out the door.
"Where exactly are we going?" Tali asked.
"First, the Nimesh marketplace, located just East of the city center. It is approximately five blocks South, and seven blocks West."
"Nimesh… like the ship?"
"Yes. The Nimesh was part of the first wave of ships to be converted to materials for rebuilding Raylin. The Conclave wished to transplant the markets to the surface as soon as possible, given the center of quarian culture that they were."
"I see."
"Somewhere you went often?" Shepard asked.
"No. Not as much as I would have liked. My father managed to take me a few times. I haven't been since I left for my pilgrimage… Not even during the time I was back with the fleet." She laughed softly to herself as she wrapped her arm around Shepard's, the two taking strides near perfectly in step with each other. Tali took a deep breath of the fresh evening air, filled with all the scents of the day. The river that defined the western border of Raylin added a subtle, aquatic aroma to the air. Real air—Another aspect of life after the suit that Tali still marveled at.
"My friends would go often. I went with one of them, once—Kalia Teran nar Rayya. It was an all day adventure. Getting our "fancy" suits on, picking our favorite shawls and accessories, making our way through the crowds on the Rayya to the shuttle bays, boarding, riding over, repeating the crowd experience until we got to the markets… It seemed such a big area in such a small ship; I had no idea how they could fit everything in there. I remember running around with Kalia, looking at the fabrics and the jewelry… One of the better days of my childhood."
"I'm sure there will be just as much to look at when we get there today." Shepard felt the girl's arm tighten around his own, perhaps with excitement from the thought.
"What about you?" Tali asked. "You never seemed to talk much about your childhood."
"It's… not really a bright spot in my life," Shepard replied, looking up at the skylines of the passing buildings.
"Can I ask why?" It was a question Shepard struggled with. Almost everyone knew of his past, but that knowledge had never come from his own mouth. Shepard avoided speaking of it like the plague. The few friends he had when he was younger, though long gone, anyway, never even heard a word of the events of his past. He heard the subtle desire in Tali's voice, though—the sincere curiosity, the wanting to know, to understand, as a means of being closer. He would be lying if he were to say it made him any more willing to share.
This is what we fought for, he heard her say. Moments like these.
"I was born on Mindoir," he began, pausing for a moment after. "Early life wasn't bad by any stretch of the word. It was a nice colony, out in the traverse. I loved learning our history… human history. Our path to the stars was fascinating. I really think being born there… living there, gave me the passion I needed to want to explore. To get on a ship and fly around the galaxy."
"Is that why you joined the Alliance?"
"Hell, no," Shepard replied. "I never thought about military. There were a million other ways I could indulge my desires."
"What changed?" At this question, Shepard fell silent. His gaze fell to the ground as the two continued walking.
"Slavers attacked. I was sixteen. I only got away because I heard my mother shrieking as they slit her throat. My dad had a small arms closet, though he was out working. I grabbed a pistol and climbed out of the window on the second story of our house. Messed up my ankle when I hit the ground. I started running through the back yard when I heard a shout from behind me. I turned to see a batarian in the back doorway, rifle up, aimed right at me. My reaction was automatic… I had raised the pistol and put three rounds into him before I even knew what happened. Two in the head, one just below the heart." The two were silent for a moment.
"Was… was that…"
"Yes. The first time I killed something." This time, the silence was longer.
"Shepard…" she said softly. He pulled his arm out from hers and wrapped it around her waist. For a while, the three walked in silence.
"Thank you for asking. Maybe I'll finish that later," Shepard said.
"We… are approaching the markets," Cypher said, its tone indicating it understood the weight of the previous conversation. "Some geth have installed centers for software and other technical assistance in the market. They are lightly traveled at this time of the day, but they are still open. Other geth in the consensus indicate some other shops may be open as well, but not as many as during the day."
"Thank you, Cypher," Tali replied