I have been on quite the writing kick lately. Do you enjoy the frequent updates? I worry I might forget a detail, so I jot down stuff every morning when I can.

Chapter 10

She was disoriented, hot and restricted because she attempted to move and it didn't work. "I think I'm dead," was her first thought. Then she heard the familiar sound of her ceiling fan. It had a certain rattle that she'd memorized when she fell asleep each night. She was in her room and everything else must have been a dream. She wanted to lift herself up to see the clock or find her phone, it was still pitch dark outside, so it wasn't morning. She still couldn't move, but she finally found feeling in her fingers. She flattened out her hand to feel what was in front of her. She jerked it back, that was a nipple, certainly not hers.

"Stop squirming, Bells," a voice spoke out.

She panicked, how much had she missed out on? Did she have a blackout or something. "Jake, what are you doing in my bed?"

"Saving your life, we'll talk about it in the morning, so go back to sleep."

"Let go of me."

He instantly released her, but as she started to pull back she felt the air on her chest, she was topless. She started grabbing for the sheet to cover herself. "Where are my pajamas?"

"You got them wet and dirty when you went out to the woods. I needed you out of them so I could warm you back up."

"You took off my clothes?"

"Yep, so you can stop trying so hard to cover up, I already saw. I'm not that noble, Bells...I looked."

She couldn't believe what he said. He saw her boobs and she was totally out of it. She wondered what position she had been in. What if he saw them at a bad angle? Ugh, he probably thought she too flat chested compared to what Nadia had under her blouse.

"I'm not sure what happened tonight, Jake, but you can go now," she informed him.

"Like hell I am. I'm staying, you can't be left alone. You were in the woods freezing to death with a large knife."

She pulled her arm out of the covers and felt.

"It's fine, you didn't do anything to it before I found you, but you cut your leg up."

"My leg?" she questioned. She ran her hand down her thigh and felt a large bandage there. Once she moved it, the soreness hit her. Her feet also ached.

"There's a lot we need to talk about, but seriously it's only 3 in the morning, go back to sleep and we'll talk in the morning."

"I'm not sleeping naked with you, Jake," she said with a huff.

He jerked down the covers to reveal his body, "I'm not naked, see and neither are you. You still have on blue panties."

She pulled the covers back up, after seeing they did have certain parts covered, but she still wanted a shirt. "I need a shirt."

He leaned over the side of the bed and threw her his. "Here,"

"No, I want one of my own," she pushed the shirt back to him.

"Fine, climb out of bed and get one, I'll lie back and enjoy the show. My night vision is quite good."

She reluctantly grabbed his shirt and slipped it on without revealing herself again.

"If you're going to stay then no more touching; stay on your side and I'll stay on mine," she instructed.

"Whatever it takes to go back to sleep...fine."

He rolled to his back, and she turned over til she was at the edge of the bed.

"Is that is far as you can go?"

"If I go any further, I'm going to roll off the bed. What's your problem, I'm not touching you."

"I feel like I can still feel you,"

He laughed at her.

She flopped around a few more times moving from her side to her back and then to her stomach. She was trying to get comfortable, but it wasn't easy. She started rubbing her feet up and down the covers. It was a habit she had as a child when she couldn't sleep or if she was upset. She happened to be both. She knew what Jacob had told her was true, she had slipped or regressed. The details were fuzzy, but she knew there was a huge problem. Her feet continued to move.

"Bells, what the hell are you doing?"

"I'm rubbing the covers," she admitted.

"Well, stop."

"I can't," as soon as she said that, his large leg crossed over her calves halting her movements.

"Get your hot, big leg off of me, Jake, she complained. "Jake...Jake," but he wouldn't answer her back or move his leg. If she kept squirming, her leg ached, so she finally gave up.

She finally drifted back off to sleep and managed to stay asleep til morning. Even though she had told him "no more touching", she realized her back was pulled against his chest and his arm hung over her waist. She wouldn't admit it to him, but it felt pretty nice. She felt like she was protected in a warm cacoon. She reminded herself she was still mad at him.

"I know your awake," he said.

"How?"

"I just do, you ready to get up? I'll make you some breakfast."

He was still laying there holding her and making small talk like everything was normal between them.

"You get up first," she didn't want to prance around him in his t-shirt even though he'd already seen what was under there.

"In a minute," he told her.

"Why not now?"

"Because I'm kinda enjoying myself."

"Well, I'm not."

"Liar," and he pulled her even closer. That's when she felt it. Jacob was enjoying himself a little too much. She started to squirm and move, but he didn't release her.

"Ugh, Bells stop moving, you're making it worse."

"Well let go and go to the bathroom or something."

"Fine, I'm getting up. Close your eyes or don't." He let go and got off the bed. She held her eyes tightly shut, but ended up taking a peak. She saw every detail of his muscular backside as he walked out of her room. He only had on a pair of tight, black boxer briefs. She wanted to shut him out of her room, but it really hurt to move. She shuffled herself to the door and closed it. She had left an array of clothes out from the night before, so she grabbed some loose fitting yoga pants and a long sleeved tee. She didn't want to squeeze in jeans the way her leg felt. She saw Jacob's pants and jacket were still on her floor.

Did he plan on walking back in her room with only his underwear on or worse, maybe a towel? She got the shirt she'd worn half the night and his jeans. He had the shower running. She hobbled to the bathroom and knocked on the door.

"Come in."

"No, that's okay. I have your clothes, I'll just hang them on the door."

She went back to her room and shut the door. She took out her phone. Seth called and so did Charlie. She probably should call Dr. Thompson, but what if she wanted to admit her for observation? Bella did not want that at all. Both Charlie and Seth only said they were calling to check on her. Seth said a few more things like he was sorry and when could they talk. He said he'd been up all night and was going to get some sleep. She no longer heard the water, so she stuck her head out the door. He was downstairs clanging pots around. She took her turn in the bathroom. He'd made himself at home in there, but he'd cleaned up after himself. She noticed he'd even used one of the extra toothbrushes she kept in the drawer. He left it in the cup right next to hers. She wasn't about to leave it out in the open, so she took it back to her room and stuffed in one of her drawers. What the hell was she thinking? Jacob didn't need his own toothbrush at her house, but she still felt like saving it.

After moving around so much, her leg really hurt and she thought it might be bleeding a little. She was going to have to ask Jacob for help, so she called out to him.

He was back in her room in less than a minute and he didn't have his shirt on even though she had left it with his jeans.

"You okay?" She couldn't help but stare like an idiot. Why hadn't he gotten fully dressed?

"Can you bring me the first aid kit? I think I've started my leg bleeding again," she stuttered. He brought back the box and came over to the bed. "You can go now, I'll fix it."

"No, I want to see, if it's bleeding again, maybe you need a few stitches on that deep one."

"But...um, I can't pull up the leg of these pants." She wasn't keen on showing him anymore of her body. He'd seen enough.

He obviously didn't understand her dilemma or think it was a big deal. "Lie back."

He reached for her waistband. "Dammit, Jake...stop, I'll do it." She squirmed and pulled down the pants just enough to expose her bandage.

He was grinning like a fool and she was beet red. She reached behind her and grabbed a pillow to cover up because her shirt wasn't long enough. He started to unwrap the outer bandage. She noticed he'd turned serious and he was very focused on taking proper care of her.

"Yes, it's bleeding, but not a lot. I think if you stay off of it and keep it rested, it'll be okay without stitches. I'll redress all of it and then I'll carry you down the stairs. I made you some scrambled eggs. I have coffee on as well."

Once Jacob announced his work was done, he pulled her pants back up and lifted her off the bed. She was pressed against his naked chest as he walked them both down the stairs.

"Jacob, where's your shirt?"

"I want you to keep that one, I've got an extra one stored on my bike."

"I don't need your shirt."

"Well, I still want you to keep it. I can't wear it anymore," was all he said, which didn't make any sense.

Jacob sat next to her at the table. He had two plates of cheesy scrambled eggs and toast. "I didn't know you cooked, this looks nice," she complimented him.

"Thanks, I don't know how to do too much, but I've perfected these."

She finished her plate, and Jacob was right, his eggs were really good. They didn't talk while they ate. She knew they had a lot to say to one another, but she didn't know where to start.

Jacob took their dishes to the sink and washed them all quickly. "Why don't you leave Charlie a note? We're going to be awhile."

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"Someplace private."

She wasn't sure why they needed to leave, but she was trusting him.

He told her to sit tight for a second, and he walked outside, so she wrote a short note to her Dad. He was gone maybe 15 minutes, but when he came back in; he had taken the time to slip on that shirt he'd mentioned.

Jacob came up to Bella where she was sitting. "Do you need anything before we leave? I'll grab us some water. Do you want anything else?"

"No, I'll just grab my jacket as we go out."

"I'm going to carry you to the truck, okay?" he asked.

"Alright."

"You ready?"

"Yes."

He slowly lifted her up, but instead of heading for the front door, he took her to the kitchen counter and sat her down. He stepped in closer. "Bells, before we go, I...um I just wanted you to know how sorry I am about everything. You're so special to me," he gently stroked the side of her face with the back of his hand. "I know I have a funny way of showing it and I've made a huge mess of everything, but I swear it wasn't intentional. The most important thing to me is that you're healthy and safe. If that means staying away from you, that's what I'll do."

He looked like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. She responded to him by reaching for his shoulders and pulling him towards her. She wanted to hold him. It wasn't exactly forgiveness or understanding, but they both had a need for the comfort.

Jacob spoke up again, "After what I have to tell you, I'm pretty sure aren't going to want to see me again." He pulled back to look into her eyes. She could feel the intensity of his gaze. He was longing for something. Maybe she was too. "Bells, don't freak out, but can I? Just once to see what it's like..." he didn't say the word, but she knew what he was asking, since both of his hands held her face. She should say "no", but she didn't because she wanted the confirmation that her feelings were real. She put her hands around his neck and he stepped in another step closer. She closed her eyes, and then his lips pressed against hers. They had denied their feelings for too long, so the bottled up emotions poured out. There was nothing timid or hesitant about the kiss. It was immediately passionate. She clung harder to his neck, he pulled at her waist and she wrapped her good leg around him. The fusion of their mouths was like nothing she'd ever experienced. It was confusing and exhilarating all at once. Was this their first kiss, their only kiss, and their last kiss all rolled up into one? She couldn't get enough him. His mouth expertly coaxed hers to conform to whatever he wanted. He was in complete control. That taste of him was exquisite and would forever be burned onto her tongue. Finally, he pulled back to give her the oxygen her body desperately craved, but she would have easily let him smother her with that kiss that never felt like it would end. He then paid attention to her face and neck, giving her more kisses all over them. She rubbed down his back, which caused her regret that she'd insisted he put on a shirt. She wished she'd been touching his hot skin.

They gave each other a couple of more short kisses and Jacob leaned into her forehead and said, "Thank you."

"Jake...

"Hmm?"

"What are we going to do?"

"I don't know, Bells. Come on, lets go. I'd rather not run into Charlie just yet."

He picked her up and she held one arm around his neck. He grabbed the water bottles and she stuck out her free hand to grab her jacket off the hook. They got into her truck and she stayed in the middle next to him, no longer caring about being spotted. She couldn't possibly leave his side after what they'd just shared.

Jacob drove them to a cabin on the northern boundary of the reservation. She knew Charlie and Billy went there occasionally. It was supposedly by some of the best fishing spots. "Wasn't this Harry's?"

"Yeah," he answered as he stopped the truck.

They went inside and Jacob took her straight for the sofa that was covered with a quilt.

He said he wanted to get it over with before he lost his nerve so he started out with a question. "Bella, remember when you were getting to know Edward and you asked me some questions the day you visited La Push with your high school friends?"

She immediately felt uncomfortable. Why would he start their talk off with a question about Edward? "Um, yeah, I guess so."

"I told you some legends, does that refresh your memory?"

She shook her head, she didn't need to be reminded. She remembered every word that was said that night.

"Bella, you and I both know that those weren't really legends, agreed?"

He knew about the Cullen's, but how? She still played dumb.

"Jacob, of course they were. Remember, they were just stories...scary stories," she recounted his words from that night.

He shook his head. "You don't have to pretend any longer. I know what Edward is...I've known for a long time."

She started to shiver. Jacob grabbed an extra blanket off the chair and threw it over her legs. He went over to the fireplace and started a fire giving her a chance to let that revelation sink in.

"I know you've noticed, Seth and I keep certain things from you."

"Yes, I've said that many times."

"Well, I'm breaking a few rules and I will answer any questions you have."

"Okay, you're some sort of leader. What do you lead, Jacob?" that much she knew.

He took her hands in his. "Look at me, Bells."

"I am ."

"No, I mean really look. You know you can trust me. I'm not going to lie to you. Everything I'm saying is the truth, no matter if it seems impossible."

"Okay."

"I'm the alpha...the alpha of a pack." She inadvertently squeezed his hands. "A wolf pack, we're spirit wolves. A few members of the tribe have a gene enabling them to shift into a wolf at a certain age. We protect the tribe against the threat of cold ones. The Cullen's are cold ones, vampires. Now, do you know I'm telling the truth?"

She looked down at their hands and took deep breaths. Her arm was tingling and she was scared, not of Jacob; but because she knew he was telling her the truth. He let go of one of her hands and ran it through her hair. "You okay?"

She shook her head side to side at first, but then changed and moved it up and down. Her eyes started to burn and she felt tears quickly form there.

"Seth?" She whispered

"Yes, Seth too. Sam, Paul, Jared, Embry, Quil, Collin, Brady and Leah," he revealed

"Leah?" she was surprised.

"Yep, it was a shock when it happened, she's the only female ever as far as we know."

"So how does it happen? Do you have to have a full moon or you only come out at night?"

"Nope, Bells, we aren't the werewolves like you've read about. We're shape-shifters, and we control when we want to change. We call it phasing. The only time we struggle controlling it is in the beginning. New wolves are more unpredictable and volatile. Of course being angry signals the urge to shift and the threat of a leech triggers it in a heartbeat. We're designed to destroy them, they're our mortal enemies. We have speed and agility in order to hunt them down. As well as acute senses of smell and hearing. We can even sense certain emotions. I know you've noticed how hot we are. Our core temp is around 108 degrees. We communicate telepathically as wolves and we heal at a remarkable rate."

"I get that it has to be a secret, but who else knows?"

"Only our pack, the elders on the counsel including my Dad, of course. Also, the imprints are in on the secret."

"Imprint, what's an imprint?"

He dropped his head towards his lap and he told her the story of how certain wolves find an imprint. He told her what the legends stated about the imprints.

Everything he said caused her heart to sink deeper and deeper. That was what Nadia was, that is why he was tied to her. She was his perfect mate, his other half, his soul mate. Bella felt like she was nothing as he explained it.

"Bells, I know it sounds hopeless, but listen to me. You met all of them? There's nothing positive I can say about it. Something isn't right with this generation. We've been screwed over. I swear to you, I'm on a quest to rectify our situation. I've found someone who is helping me, because the counsel is a dead end."

"Why did you get involved with me Jacob? Are you that selfish, it wasn't enough to have a woman that was created just for you? Was I some sort of challenge you sought because you were bored? What was the point of any of this? I can't believe the way you kissed me earlier, when you can't possibly feel anything for me. I'm such an idiot. I let you use me."

"No, you have it all wrong. I'm not using you, but you're right, I'm selfish. I want you, Bells. Please don't turn me away. I don't want her, but it isn't possible to leave her yet. I'm trying, and I've made a little progress. It's slow going, and it isn't fair to ask you to wait, but I'm still going to. We have something, you know we do. It's strong... strong enough to interfere with this supernatural bond that is supposed to be unbreakable. That should mean something, don't you think?"

"You all are whatever they need, correct? They want a lover, so it ends up in a romantic relationship except for Quil. What is that even?"

"He's like a brother to her, for now. She's a handful, as you anyone can see. It pretty much has gone to all their heads, having someone that is utterly devoted to only them. The only one that is not too bad is Kim, but that union is still flawed. Jared is very smart, he was headed to college with a full scholarship. Of course, he lost it after he phased. He and Kim have absolutely nothing in common, but she at least tries to be a decent person. She just rubs most people the wrong way, but she had a difficult life. Her parents were very selfish, they left her after she got with Jared. He's all she has in life."

"So, four of you out of ten? You say it's rare, but that's 40%, could more wolves imprint?"

"Yes, Bells. It could still happen to him."

"I came back to Forks to start living my life again and I've managed to get wrapped up with not one, but two men that can never truly be mine?"

"I don't think it's as cut and dry as that."

"Well, there's only one thing to do as far as I'm concerned."

"And what's that?"

"I'm going back to Florida, Charlie's nearly 100% recovered. There's no reason for me to stay any longer," she declared.

"No, running away isn't going to solve anything. Didn't you learn from before?"

"I had to leave, I couldn't stay here," she pulled away from him.

"Bells, you didn't do very well by leaving. You've told me the stories. I wish you would have stayed. Maybe I could've helped you. Everything would have been different."

"How so? You still would've imprinted on Nadia and abandoned me just like..." she didn't say his name, but Jacob knew what she was thinking.

"Do you honestly think I would've been hanging out in bars picking up randoms if I had someone like you in my life? I would've been with you all the time?"

"So now it's my fault you ended up a player and met Nadia in a bar?"

"No, of course not. I'm not blaming you for my fucked up existence. I just wonder sometimes. Everyone has 'what ifs'. Bells, please, don't go. You still need help. Let me help you. We need to talk about how you almost hurt yourself, honey. You have no idea how scared I was when I realized you were out there bleeding. It's time we go to Charlie. He needs to know."

"No, Jacob. You keep asking me to trust you. You know that is a horrible thing to burden him with. I can't," she cried.

"I'm sorry Bells, but if you don't tell him, I will. I know I promised, but I'd rather disappoint you than find you past the point of no return and have to tell Charlie how I knew, but I promised to keep quiet. Why don't you take him with you to your therapist? She could probably help explain. You need to call her and tell her."

"I know, but please, not my dad," she pleaded again even though he wasn't accepting her answer.

She then admitted she wished he'd never found her.

"You don't mean that? Do you really want to die?"

"No, it'd be easier." She rubbed up and down her arm.

Jacob stopped her, "We have to do something about this," he turned her arm over and took a closer look.

"What do you mean?"

"As soon as I saw it, I knew what it was. Explain to me how you weren't changed." Bella told him all about James. He looked disgusted as soon as she started talking. He had a puzzled look hearing how Edward sucked the venom out. He started to touch the scar and area around it. She pulled back, not liking the feeling it produced.

"You really don't like to be touched there, do you?" was his observation.

"Not by you," she admitted.

He raised his eyebrows like he was trying to draw some sort of conclusion.

"What about here?" He brushed across her cheek and down her neck. Her body was a wicked traitor. He'd pretty much informed her there was no way he could be with her, but she still melted into his touch. He trailed his hand down her arm and then brought it to her waist. He leaned in and put his cheek against hers. His hand actually went up the bottom of her shirt to rub the skin above her waist and he placed one gentle kiss on her lips again. "That all feels good to you, doesn't it?"

She pulled back, but didn't answer, because it all felt extremely good. He knew it did, by the way she reacted.

"Something is not right about that scar. I want to take you to someone. Her name is Kelsee, but you can't tell anyone about it. She's not on good terms with the tribe, but I think she needs to examine you."

"Is she a doctor?"

"Not in the traditional sense," he shifted his gaze like he was hiding something.

Bella grimaced.

"Maybe, some people have it in their minds, she's some sort of a witch, but it's not true. People are just afraid of the unknown or things that can't explain."

"I don't know...I don't think I feel comfortable with that."

"Please think about it, Bells. Most of the time you seem very well adjusted, how are we to know what that bite did to you? You shouldn't even be alive after something like that. I've given you a lot to think about, but can we at least stay in touch? What about Seth?"

"I have no idea, it almost felt like we were breaking up last night, but I still have to face him. I want to go back home, Jake, but I don't want to cut all ties to you. I really don't."

He hugged her again and they both held on for a long time. He kissed her forehead, "Alright, let me get you back home."

"I have one more request," she stated.

"Anything, what is it?"

"Can I see you as a wolf?"

Thanks for reading. Always love hearing what you might be thinking...