Here we go...Sorry for the long delay. Thanks to Spitfire 303 who start this chapter, and a lot of Thanks to Theresa F. Who ends the beta edition for this one!
Also, I have to say Thanks to all of you who read this, I'm really grateful with all! Not only because all of you continous support to my work, all of you are kind with your reviews, and all of your words to me. Thanks to all, because you makes me feel part not only a fandom, you make me feel part of a family, the GAbby family :').
Tissue warning, just in case...
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For Valentine's Day, Gibbs gives Abby a beautiful necklace. It is a golden heart with a dove shape on it. Later, the whole team gathers for a romantic movie session in MTAC and the entire night was stolen by Tony and Ziva and their hilarious fights, making everyone laugh hysterically. That night Abby noticed something was different between her co-workers, but she was unable to ask anyone about it.
When the spring came, Ziva still wasn't speaking with the Goth, and the boys are getting tired and angry because the stubborn Israeli won't change her mind, even if she still is missing her friend. Gibbs tries and tries to help the girls forgive each other... but it was in vain, so one day he simply stops trying and began making a massive efforts to keep the girls apart, it was easier for all of them.
One Monday morning, a few weeks later, Tony sends Ziva to Abby's Lab. There's nothing important in the lab about the case, but he hopes that the girls will talk to each other, if they are alone. So a rather upset Ziva, taking the elevator down to the lab, all the while desperately trying to find any excuse to go back up to the bullpen. Once she left the elevator, the smell of chemicals from Abby's work hits her hard, and soon she feels sick. The only thing she can do is to put her hand over her mouth and run to the closest sink, and just after she reaches it; her breakfast makes a vicious re-appearance.
Abby terrified; not knowing if she should call Ducky or Tony or do something to help. She wants to help, but what if Ziva rejects her help, Abby thinks? Once Ziva has finished, Abby moves closer, noting that she looks weak and pale. Ziva turns at the sound of her footsteps, almost falling down. Abby runs to her side and lowers her friend down onto the cool floor. She sits by Ziva's side, waiting until she begins to feel better.
A few minutes later, Ziva opens her eyes and turns her head to look Abby.
"Are you feeling better?" Abby asks, quietly.
"A little." Ziva whispers back.
"How can I help you?" Abby is concerned, knowing collapsing like that isn't normal.
"Can you make the world, and my head stop spinning for the next hour?" Ziva asks, with a half-smile on her face.
"I'm good, but not that good; sorry." Abby responses, happy knowing that her friend is okay.
"It's Okay, it will pass." Ziva sighs, knowing it not the first time she has vomited like this, as of recent.
"Did you want to call Ducky?" Abby inquires; just wanting to double-check that everything is okay.
"No, just give me two more minutes and I should feel better... once this nasty nausea goes away." Ziva replies, quickly.
Abby asked "Are you still nauseous?"
Ziva nods, regretting it instantly as the next wave of nausea hits her.
"Wait right there, I might have something that can help you, so don't move." Abby jumps up and rushes to the refrigerator next to the wall, opens the door and moves some items aside. Eventually finds an old juice box, hidden behind some donuts. Racing back, she sits down beside Ziva. "Here. Drink this."
Ziva tries to sit up, only to be stopped by Abby. "No, don't get up just roll to your side and drink this slowly."
"What is this?" Ziva asks confused as what the liquid was.
"Apple juice, it will make you feel better." Abby promises.
"Really?" Ziva whisper hoping that it's true.
"Yeap, the glucose in it will make you feel better and apples can calm down unsettled stomachs. So it is always helpful, and it is cheap... but is rather addictive". Abby warns, as she watches her friend take a sip.
"Sorry for the mess." Ziva apologizes, putting her head into her hands.
"No, don't worry, it's okay. I know how it feels to be this sick, and that sink is use to being puked in, believe me." Abby replies smirking, remembering how often she vomited in that poor sink, in the first's months of her...
"What? What is it? Abby why are you so pale?" Ziva asks, concerned about her friends sudden silence.
"I have to call Ducky." Abby states, standing to go call the doctor.
"No!" Ziva screams, grabbing Abby's arm. "Please Abby. Please don't, it's not necessary." She was begging now.
"It is Ziva! You're sick!" Abby argues, worried by Ziva's reaction.
"Yeah but... I'll feel better in a minute." Ziva responds her voice becoming quieter as she seemed unsure of herself.
"Liar, You know what is wrong with you, don't you?" Abby challenges.
"I'm not sure but, maybe..." Ziva trails off uncertain about to finish that sentence.
"Maybe?" Abby confirms, she is positive that she knows what is wrong with Ziva. "Do you want to know?"
"How?" Ziva asks curiously.
"Wait here." Abby goes over to her purse and gives Ziva a blue box. "Go." she orders. Once the other girl was out of the lab, Abby holds her head with her hands, all of the tension coming back. Breathing deeply, in an attempt to calm herself down, despite her reliving all the emotion she felt when she took the first test; the overwhelming fear, the implausible hope. It was the longest three minutes of her life... It evoked all the joy and later the pain she felt. She hopes Ziva that is distracted by the result and doesn't ask why she has a pregnancy test on her? Yeah, the only chance she had was at Christmas... and it didn't work, nature came and so the test stayed in her purse, months after with it all of her hopes.
A crying Ziva come back into the lab minutes later, with the stick in her hand...
Abby ask "So?"
The girl smiles shyly letting her see the result, something inside Abby was broken, but the joy in her friend's eyes melts her heart and she hugged Ziva happily.
"You're the first person who knows this" Ziva says.
"Really?" Abby responds
Ziva nods smiling "Why me?
I'm your worst friend ever!" Abby says
"I'm yours too" Ziva responds
"No Ziva, I was mean, horrible, and very rude with everyone, but I was the worst with you" Abby says
"And I let you, I need to ask you why are you acting like this, I need to force you to talk with me... but, I was distracted, and Gibbs told us one day "You were sick, and to give you some time" and we did... Abby it wasn't your entire fault ok? You needed us and we left you alone."
"No Ziva... I was the one who was acting bad... I was selfish, and stubborn, I hurt everyone, and I hurt my best friends, I hurt you... that day you came here to talk to me and I kicked you out, you had something important to tell me, and I kicked you out! I was wrong Ziva; me not you"
"All of us act wrong Abby, we are a weird family, and when one of us is in pain, the rest react badly, because nobody hurts our family, even if we don't know why they are in pain, all of us acted wrong... but we are here now, and you'll be an auntie Abb's"
"Yeah! Hey... speaking about that... Who's the baby's daddy?" Abby asked
"Oh God!" Ziva said blushing hardly "You want to know that too?"
"Well... Yeah! I discover the sin, tell me who the sinner is" Abby said smiling "Please, pretty please?"
"I will tell you Abby, but with one condition" Ziva says "You can't tell anyone anything about this"
Abby nods and states "Who's going to believe me?"
"Well... first of all Gibbs will" Ziva says
"No he doesn't, Why Gibbs, Why me?" Abby questions
"Oh please! Maybe the others are blind but not me...I saw you two kissing eachother in here a lot of times over the last year... and I know you've been living with him since Christmas" Ziva explains
"How did you know that?" Abby questions
"I called the Boss to wish him Good Christmas" Ziva says
"Merry Christmas" Abby corrects
"What?" Ziva asks
"It's Merry Christmas" Abby say
"Yeah... whatever...I called the Boss, and I can hear you talking with Tony at the same time in the background"
"Oh my God! You were a naughty girl that Christmas!" Abby responds.
"Why?" Ziva ask
"Well, yes you could hear me that night... but how did you know that it Tony I was talking with? You were there with him Ziva..." Abby says
"No..." Ziva firmly denies.
"Oh yes, you were there... and when you call like two in the morning... you're with him, in his bed, you can't deny it... so spit everything girl, you're busted" Abby says
"Ok, but not here, everyone can hear us... Let's go out and get something to eat" Ziva says
"Yeah... let's go" States Abby.
Both girls get up, and start to go out, but the sound of Abby's cellphone stop them in their tracks "Darn work" Abby sighs.
"See you upstairs when you're ready okay?" Ziva says
"Yeap" Abby answer before Ziva goes to the elevator.
In the loneliness of her Lab, Abby start to cry once Ziva was gone. She was scared and desperate... and she doesn't know why... she was happy for her friend, she knows how much Ziva wants to have this baby, she was happy, she really was! But all those stupid tears don't want to stop. One part of her was saying "This is stupid" and that she doesn't have a reason to cry. And the other part was replaying her pregnancy...
Without noticing, she was curled up under her desk with a very bad anxiety attack. And now there was beeping, and she didn't want to answer the video call, but when Karla's face appears on the screen and Abby herd her voice, she was happy, because now, her friend would help her through it.
"Hello You!" Karla says happily
"Hi" Abby answer with a raspy voice
"Bad time my friend? You sound like hell" Karla ask
"Yeah, a little" Abby responds Abby start crying again when she tells the news to her friend... Only Karla will understand all of her pain.
"Abby you know why you crying?" Karla ask
"No, It's stupid but I'm scared...I'm being selfish again?" Abby responds
"No baby... You're not... You're worried for your friend, you're scared thinking that maybe she will have the same experience you had, and you're crying because you love your friend so much, that you'd give everything you have to prevent any pain for her... Am I wrong?" Karla ask
"No... Maybe not... why I'm feeling like this?" Abby questions
"You're healing my friend, you're starting to heal, that's a good thing my friend" Karla said smiling at her.
"Can we talk later?" Abby begs.
"Yeah, I'll go to dinner with my Novio, but when I get back to my house, I'll call you, okay?" Karla responds
"Yeap" Abby ended the video call, and tries to redo her makeup, later she turn off her computer and walks into the bullpen, where her friend was waiting for her.
The panic in Gibbs's eyes when he looked back and forth between the two girls, then they hugged and started to walk out together. To tell Abby the truth he thought... He knows he should have done that, and that's why he stopped his efforts to interrupt their talk.
Abby wanted to kill that man, she want to head slap him to Mexico and back... and by that moment she didn't know if she had to feel so loved or so overprotected...Darn Marines and their instincts... She chooses her friend this time... Ziva needs her right now... later Gibbs will pay for this traition... and it will hurt so much.
By the evening, when Abby makes her way to the bullpen, she wants to hide Gibbs inside the elevator, only to kick his stubborn ass until she was too tired to do it anymore. She can't understand why he acts like this, she already knows he had a need to protect her from all the pain, but it was stupid trying to hide her from the rest of their lives. She's not that weak, and for God's sake, she's a grown woman... She already lost her daughter... what can be worst then that?
As she arrives at the bullpen, and the only thing on her mind was of all her fury against Gibbs, but before reaching her destination Vance meets up with her, talking briefly and then seconds later, he is walking her to his office.
In the bullpen, Gibbs was holding his breath, he was scared as hell when he would see her, but at the end he thanked silently to God for the sudden interruption.
Two hours later, he regrets all his thoughts. The karma kicks him in the ass with no mercy. The last place where he wanted to see Abby was the exact place where he meets up with her... the elevator. She was going home early while he was going down to see Ducky. The awkward silence descends between them, making both of them feel miserable.
"Why?" Abby asks, with pain.
"Why what?" was Gibbs response
"I talk with Ziva... I know you know" Abby whisper
"I don't know... but I was trying to protect you" was Gibbs response
"From what?" Abby asked
Gibbs response "Pain, he signed, I was trying to protect you from the pain."
"Yeah! You did that perfectly!" Abby scream "That's why my friend was so scared to talk to me, that's why I feel isolated all of these months"
"It wasn't my intention" Gibbs tries to interject
"I know, you just are protecting me" Abby says sarcastically "That's why you are ignoring me Gibbs?"
"What are you talking about?" Gibbs questions
"Christmas, you beg me to stay with you, in your house. That night you make love to me, and later on nothing more. You go and hide in your basement for hours after work, and next, you came to sleep next to me, in the morning, we just go to work, eat in silence, and everything starts over the same again. So yes, I'm sorry, but I feel abandoned, ignored and totally alone. You don't desire or want me Gibbs?" Abby states with anger
"Is not like that, let me explain Abby" Gibbs says with passion
"What? You will tell me why you kept me apart from my friend? It was horrible Gibbs, yes, but at some point, I start to need my old life, my routines... my friends and you...You Gibbs, you kept me away from my friend! Tony had to send her to me, he lied to her, and sent her to me, hoping we could talk, because, she is sick Gibbs, she was scared as hell! And that fear was eating her alive!" Abby says with pain in her voice
"How do you know that?" Gibbs questions
"Because I was there once..." Abby states
"I'm sorry Abby; I really am... but, forgive me because I didn't know how you would react!" Gibbs explains
"Then what; you will hide me for the rest of our lives? You will keep me away from everything and everyone? I'm not a darn porcelain doll" Abby yells
"I know, I know!" Gibbs replies
"Why then do you treat me like one? I'm not a little girl you have to protect! I lost my... Our little girl Gibbs" Abby says between tears " I'm a woman, and I need to feel like one, I need to know if the life can go on...I need my life to go on"
"Sorry" Gibbs says with sorrow in his voice
"I know you do. But Gibbs, I don't need a father to protect me... I don't want one" Abby breathes deeply, trying to control all her emotions " " I need a man by my side, I need the man who I'm in love with... but the only thing I can see, is... that man that went away after I lost my baby"
"Abby, please, I'm sorry" Gibbs starts to plead
"Me too", Abby says touching his face "Don't wait for me tonight"
"Why?" questions Gibbs
"I have a plane to catch... see you later, if I come back" Abby states
"Where you go?" Gibbs ask
"Home Gibbs, I'm going home" then, she does the same thing he has done every morning before going to work, Abby kiss him on the forehead, she enters the elevator, she step out when it stops at the lobby, and walk away, without looking back.