It's been six months since we've gotten married. It is the worst and the best thing I've ever done. Edward is an amazing father to our Aimee and she adores him. I couldn't have asked for a much better father for my child. He's always attentive to her and they have a really tight bond. I love that they have that relationship. Me and my dad never had that type of bond and I wish we had. On the other hand, our marriage is hanging on by a thread. We never have sex, spontaneity is out of the question, he's moody to all hell, and he's become very emotional. I don't mean it in a condescending way because I do love him, but sometimes he's hard to be around.

I feel bad that his presence annoys me but I'm tired, overworked, sexually frustrated, and lonely. I want my best friend back. I often wonder if this it. If this is what marriage is supposed to be like.

Ever since we've been married, everything has become about Aimee. Look, I get it, she's our child, and needs us. But I feel neglected as a partner. I have needs and wants too. I work long hours to provide for our family. I don't mind it and I love providing, but some nights it would be nice to come home to food and a clean home. I understand staying home with Aimee is tough, but he has time while she is napping, she has quiet time. There are plenty of opportunities for him to put forth effort.

He doesn't know this, but I stay at work longer than necessary so I don't have to come home. Sometimes I can't stand the thought of going home. Besides, I have a good time with my coworker. He's a cool dude. Sometimes we get a little flirty but nothing more. It's tempting because he's a very attractive man, but I want to honor my vows. Like I said, I love Edward, he's the father of my child and my first love. He means the world to me but I feel like our relationship is stagnant.

Tonight I'm going to at least try to do something about our sex life. I'm going crazy here. It's been 5 months and I've been dying for his touch. I miss the intimacy and the love and the passion we shared when we made love. He doesn't know it but when he comes back from putting our daughter down, I'm gonna be dressed sexy for him. I'm going to wear his favorite pice of lingerie for him.

I can hear him singing to Aimee and she's getting tired. She's a lot less fussy and starting to become really quiet. As I'm listening to her settling down, I start lighting candles and setting up the music. I light his favorite scented candles and I'm playing his favorite playlist for love making. I'm hoping to score and I'm hoping he'll be able to unwind a bit. I know he's tresses out trying to run the house.

I hear him close Aimee's bedroom door and I get into a sexy pose on the bed. When he walks in, the look on his face was priceless. I could tell if he was annoyed, surprised, or happy. As he stands near the door shocked, I get up and walk to him slowly. I plant a kiss on his lips and make my way to his neck. He's moaning in pleasure, exactly what I wanted. I start running my hands over the bulge that's beginning to stiffen. That's a very good sign and I'm beginning to get excited. I can feel my panties getting wet.

I bring myself to look him dead in the eye and I start to unbuckle his belt. Once it's unbuckled I free him from his restricting pants. I feel him through his boxers and he let's out a ragged breath. I then free him from his boxers and get down on my knees. I press the tip of his penis against my lips.

"Bella, please." He begs. "Don't make me beg." He pleads once more. I love when he begs for it. So I'm going to make him do it. I stick my tongue out and give him a lick and then slip the head of his penis in my mouth and swirl my tongue around it. He's trying to hold back his moans. It's not working. I hate when he's quiet, I love when he gets loud and super into it. I keep doing that until he's had enough. He puts his hand on the back of my head and pushes down so that more of him is in my mouth. At that point, he's got his head thrown back in pleasure, pushing my head up and down on his penis while thrusting.

After a few moments of this, he grabs a fistful of my hair and pulls me off and pulls me to a standing position. He gives me a a rough, passionate kiss, turns me around, and leads me to the bed. He then proceeds to roughly bend me over our bed with my behind fully exposed.

"Is this what you want, Bella?" He's teasing me by just sticking the tip inside of me and pulling it out, repeatedly. It gets me even more excited with anticipation. I've been waiting months for this.

"Yes, Edward. I want you so bad. Can't you feel me?"

"I do." He inserts all of himself inside me and pulls out. He does that a few times before I'm begging him to stop teasing me and just give me what I want. After my constant pleading, he slams into me. I cry out loudly, I'm really enjoying this. He continues at a furious rate and I can tell he's getting close.

"Not yet. I'm so close." I cry. "Don't you do it."

And right then and there, I could feel him stiffen and grunt. That's when he started emptying himself into me. And then he crawled into bed and went to sleep. Seriously? Im SO sick of this shit! I go into my drawer and grab my vibrator. I was hoping this night would end differently. Sigh.