(Warnings and Disclaimers same as previous chapter)

To Love a Monster (part 11)

~Taking Off~

by: AniDragon and TheLostZelda

Zelgadis needed to talk to Amelia. He had probably jumped to conclusions about the ring. Maybe that hadn't been what she'd been looking for in the first place. Even if it was, he had to find out for sure.

He could hear her crying before he even got to the room. Great. He'd made her cry. Again. Well, the least he could do was try to comfort her.

He knocked on the door, and had to keep himself from cursing out loud when he heard a familiar voice say, "It's alright, Amelia-san, I'll get the door."

He wasn't surprised, after that, to see Xellos open the door. He'd probably planned this entire situation, after all. That still didn't stop him from being mad.

"Could I have a word with you?" Zelgadis asked through gritted teeth.

Xellos raised his eyebrows, "Of course," He turned his head, "I'll be right back, Amelia-san."

It took only seconds after Xellos shut the door for Zelgadis to take a swing at him. The Mazoku dodged easily, dematerializing and then reappearing again in the same spot, "My, what violence!"

"You just can't mind your own business, can you?" Zelgadis accused.

"Your business is technically my business," Xellos countered, "At least, so long as you're searching for Claire Bible manuscripts. I need to keep track of everyone who's interested in them, including you."

"So what does Amelia have to do with that? I'm not searching for the manuscripts now, so shouldn't you just take off?"

Xellos smirked, "Amelia has had enough people take off on her."

Zelgadis's jaw dropped, then clenched again.

"Oh, did I hit a sore spot, there?" Xellos teased, vanishing and reappearing behind him, placing his hands on the chimera's shoulders, "After all, you're quite familiar with taking off, aren't you?"

"Shut up!" Zelgadis spun around, his fist meeting only air where Xellos's face had been a moment ago.

"Are you claiming differently?" Xellos was behind him once again, his voice only inches from his ear.

"You know I was planning on coming back, even before I got your note!"

"Well, of course you were planning on coming back for a visit," There was a slight pause as Xellos opened his eyes, "Unless, of course, you found another lead."

"I…" Zelgadis wanted to argue, but he couldn't even convince himself that the damn Mazoku was wrong. Damn it, why couldn't he say anything? He would have followed that lead and then come back to her, unless there was a lead after that. Then he would have just put it off like he'd been doing for the past year. He would have come back eventually, but eventually wasn't good enough.

"Can't think of a comeback, can you?" Xellos smirked, sitting comfortably in the air before Zelgadis.

Zelgadis was mentally cornered, and Xellos knew it. Nothing could be said in defence to his comment, at least nothing that wouldn't make it sound like he was grasping at straws.

"You're right…" He finally admitted, frustrated, "I would have followed the lead, and any one after it. I'd follow any lead that might have brought me to my cure, even though I know there might not be one."

Xellos had not seen this coming and was honestly surprised at this humility.

"I'm stubborn like that, I'll admit it. I can't help but believe that there IS a way to get my body back," Zelgadis looked at his hand and clenched it, "Just like I couldn't help but believe Amelia would wait for me. I guess that's two things I misjudged my time on."

There was silence in the hallway as neither party wished to continue the confrontation. Zelgadis had admitted defeat, and Xellos had lowered himself to the ground to stand before him with nothing to say to it. It was at this point that Amelia's door opened slightly and the princess peeked her head out to investigate. Xellos looked to her, but then returned his gaze to Zelgadis, who made no motion at all to acknowledge her presence.

"I want to leave for a while"

Now both Xellos and Zelgadis looked at Amelia, shocked, and she continued determinedly, "I want to go talk to Lina-san about all this, so I can sort everything out."

Zelgadis lowered his head; this was Xellos's department.

The Mazoku walked over to Amelia and embraced her. They both disappeared, leaving Zelgadis standing alone and defeated in the empty hallway.

~*~

Lina leaned back in her chair and patted her full stomach, "Oh, man, that was some good breakfast!"

"I'll say," Gourry picked at his teeth with a piece of straw, "Your mom sure knows how to cook."

Lina laughed, "She has to! She's had to feed me and my sister while we were growing up, not to mention herself and my dad! All of us have the same appetite," She turned to him and winked, "Adding you to the mix didn't make that big of a difference."

"Well…" Gourry glanced over to the sink with a wince, "It apparently made enough of a difference for her to put us on dishes duty…"

Lina sighed, "Yeah, we should get started on those…"

Gourry stood up first, grabbing a mound of plates from the table as he did so, and brought them to the already-full sink. Lina opted to stay in her chair for a few more minutes. She always let Gourry start ahead of her, since she preferred to dry dishes over washing them.

Well, actually she preferred to not do dishes at all, since she was used to eating at inns and restaurants by now, but hey, if it got her a free meal…

Just as Gourry got the water ready, there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it!" Lina chimed cutely, hoping to get even more time off dishes duty.

She got up to answer the door, and was surprised to see Amelia there.

"A… Amelia?" She asked.

"Um… Hello, Lina-san," Amelia laughed nervously, "Sorry to drop in on you unannounced like this… again…"

"That's alright, come on in," She glanced outside, looking for the likely method of travel she took, "Xellos isn't with you?"

"No, I asked him to leave after he dropped me off. I need to speak to you and Gourry-san alone."

"Is something wrong?" Lina asked, closing the door behind her.

Amelia shrugged, "It's… everything's a bit of a mess right now. I need some advice, is all."

Lina lead Amelia over the kitchen counter, handing her a drying cloth, "That's no problem at all. Why don't you help Gourry with the dishes while you tell me all about it?"

"Lina!" Gourry exclaimed, his arms now elbow-deep in soapy water, "That's not very fair! You're supposed to help me with the dishes!"

"It's alright, Gourry-san," Amelia smiled and grabbed the cloth, "Actually, It's nice to have a bit of a distraction."

"So what's up?" Lina asked, sitting back down into her chair and leaning it back onto the two back legs.

"Zelgadis-san is back in Seyruun," Amelia began.

"Isn't that a good thing?" Gourry interrupted.

"I thought so too, because I wanted to see him so much, but... He's only there because of Xellos-san."

"What's up with you and Xellos, anyway?" Lina demanded, "I mean, you two seemed pretty close last time you visited."

Amelia blushed, "He's… well… He's been courting me."

Lina's chair nearly fell backwards,"Xellos has been… Amelia, you know he's just plotting something, you can't trust him!"

"I know that!" She shook her head, "I… He told me what he's plotting already. It has nothing to do with Seyruun. In fact, he's… he's been helping me with some things…"

Lina settled her chair back down to the floor, "A Mazoku's help usually comes at a price…"

"I've thought of all that," Amelia reassured her, "I'm not too worried about it, since I know what he wants. But anyway, he told Zelgadis-san that he's been courting me, which is what prompted him to come back."

"Well of course Zelgadis would come back knowing that," Lina rolled her eyes, "He'd be worried, and would want to protect you, after all."

"Well, yes… But how long is he going to stay? I'm afraid that if I cancel the wedding, he'll just leave again."

Lina nodded, "Seems like something he'd do... Wait, what wedding?!"

"Oh right," Amelia laughed nervously, "Xellos-san and I are sort of engaged to be married…"

"Sort of?!" Lina exclaimed, "How can you be sort of engaged?!"

"Well... It's not official yet, but… I thought it might prompt Zelgadis-san to… to tell me how he feels about me."

"So you agreed," Lina pressed.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time…"

"So you're getting married?" Gourry asked, "Congratulations!"

Lina face-palmed, "Gourry, shut up. Amelia, I think you might have pushed things a bit too far. There are other ways to get Zelgadis to open up. Have you considered, you know, talking to him about it?"

"How could I?" She asked bitterly, "Before Xellos-san stepped in, Zelgadis-san never even visited! If I'm going to wait for him, I want to at least know what he feels about me! If he can't even admit that, then why shouldn't I marry someone else?"

"Marrying someone else is one thing," Lina admitted, "If you'd had to get married for political reasons or something, I'd understand your decision a bit more. But I can't see any political reason for you to marry Xellos, and it's not like you love him, right?"

"I… I don't know…"

"You don't know?" Lina's eyes widened, "You mean there's a possibility you might?"

Amelia sighed and leaned onto the counter, "I know that his goals are less than noble, but… I can talk to him. And though he has to leave occasionally to do his duties as a Mazoku, he always comes back, and it doesn't take weeks or months or years before he does! I don't have to sit there and wonder if he's even alive, or if he's lying dead in a ditch out in the middle of nowhere!"

SNAP!

Amelia blinked as she looked down at the plate she'd been drying. It had snapped in two due to the force she was clinging to it with.

And suddenly, her mask was back up, as she frantically apologized, offered to pay for the plate, and searched for a broom and dustpan to clean up any little bits of ceramic that might have fallen to the ground unnoticed.

When she'd finished, Lina put a hand on her shoulder to calm her down, "Alright then. Here's what I think you should do."

~*~

Zelgadis laid back on his bed exhausted, both mentally and physically. He wouldn't admit to himself that it was good for him. The fight with Xellos really did relieve a lot of stress, especially while attempting to punch him, but now he was stuck repeating everything that was said in his head over and over again. Why did he keep doing this?

He let one of the books on the bed fall to the floor without care. He had brought many back to his room from the library and set them on his desk so he would not need to continuously visit the library for more. He had started reading one while sitting on his bed, but his own thoughts interrupted him so that he only managed to get through one paragraph before giving up.

Every time he started thinking he'd changed, someone would point out that it was only temporary. That he really couldn't just leave anything in the past. Not Rezo, not his human self, not even his own weaknesses that he became a chimera to get rid of.

Xellos, on the other hand, was able to take her anywhere to her heart's content. Be anywhere she needed him to be. All without ever interfering with what duties a Mazoku could have. Zelgadis was a chimera but he was still part human after all, and being in two places at once was still impossible for him.

He raised his hand into the air and cast a lighting spell. Holding the small orb of light, he could feel the little bit of heat radiate off of it. He stared at it in his hand. A small light in the darkness of his room.

If he could just let things go he'd be able to be happy. He'd be able to be with Amelia. This body, it didn't matter to her. His issues with Rezo, she understood them and helped him deal with them. And as for his weaknesses… He clenched his fist and let the light go out… she had been a victim to them.

She had once died in his arms by Phibrizzo's hand, and he had been powerless to stop it. The sparkle of life in her eyes had gone out the same way that the orb had. Taking with it the light and warmth that had kept him out of the darkness.

Now he lay there, cold and alone. A cool breeze came through his window. It was almost cold enough that he could see his breath in the pale moonlight that shone in.

The cold didn't bother him. It was the wetness that came with the snow melting and soaking his robes that made him not like travelling in the winter. He learned to put up with it until he could get to an inn for the night, if he hadn't he'd end up with icicles hanging from the rocks on his face, which made it all the harder to blend in the next town he got to.

But there was no snow yet, and it would still be a while before there would be any. He'd at least have enough time to get to the desert region before winter hit full force if he left now. So why did he stay?

Xellos, although he was a manipulative bastard, still made her happy from his point of view. He was also more then able to protect her. She didn't need him there; he had been replaced.

So what kept him from just leaving? He rolled over and looked over the edge of his bed at his belongings, still in his travel bags. Everything was ready for him, all he had to do was pick them up and go. He didn't even need to return the books he had borrowed from the library. The maids would find them and bring them back.

He reached over and grabbed the top of the bag and could feel the ring box on the top of the pile inside. He hadn't had the right chance to give it to her yet, and with things the way they were, odds are, he never would.

He raised himself to his feet with the bag in hand and suddenly felt light headed. Setting the bag down and sitting on the bed, he laid sideways. Perhaps his confrontation had taken more out of him then he had thought, or maybe his body was telling him to stay. Whatever the reason, Zelgadis couldn't resist shutting his eyes and slipping into unconsciousness.

Xellos phased into the room. His hand was outstretched towards Zelgadis from the sleeping spell he'd just cast, and he lowered it back down with a smirk.

"Poor predictable Zelgadis," Xellos shook his head, "Just because Amelia-san isn't here doesn't mean it's alright to leave without saying 'goodbye'. Perhaps a goodnight's rest will help you rethink your decision."

~End of Chapter 11~

(A/N: AniDragon is off on vacation for this update so the responsibility of updating was passed to the one who never updates. Hope everything is in order for this one, cause things are gonna get hectic mid-August, with the buffer becoming dangerously small and my vacation to an area without wifi just around the corner. But, rest assured, this WILL NOT DIE!!!)