A/N: Sooooo last chapter was kind of hard to follow, so I'm not really happy with this chapter, I feel like I can't match up to last chapter and everything's downhill from here! But I hope you enjoy it anyway! This is a reaaaallllyyy long chapter like I probably should have split it but I couldn't find a decent place so...yeah. Definitely had a lot more to write for this week's ep than last weeks!
Thank you to all the guest reviewers whose names I unfortunately do not know but who consistently have incredible things to say to me, it always makes me smile reading your reviews, thank you!
Caleb had finally cracked. He'd been determined to stay at the apartment. Mona already thought he was acting crazy…over protective, and he knew he should reign it back but he couldn't take it anymore. It was late. He had no idea where Hanna was and he was worried. No-one was answering his calls. He'd paced. He'd freaked out. He'd paced some more. He'd imagined every possible bad scenario that Hanna could have been involved in. He'd paced a little bit more. Had his calls rejected again. And then he'd reached a level of worry like he'd never felt before. He felt like something was wrong and he couldn't get images of Hanna alone and scared out of his head. So he'd finally left the apartment and driven over to Spencer's. He figured he'd check there first. That's where all the girls would be if there'd been some sort of clue or break through. He drove careless of the speed limit, it wasn't like anyone was around at this time of night anyway. He pulled up in front of Spencer's house, the car barely stopped before he was jumping out and slamming the door. He rushed over to the barn as fast as he could, he still had a key thanks to Spencer. He really should give it back but he just…he hadn't gotten around to it. Hanna had been his main focus. He was about to put the key in the lock when he heard a raised voice, "NO. Okay, NO." That's Hanna's voice. Then he heard his name and he knew he shouldn't….but he very slowly and carefully put the key in to the lock, waited until he heard the murmur of voices again…and then slowly opened the door a crack. Not very wide, but wide enough that he could hear them clearly. They must have been close to the door, Hanna sounded like she was in the armchair close by.
Caleb had a pretty good idea what was going on with Hanna, he knew her like the back of his hand, but he figured a little extra insight couldn't hurt at this stage. It was what he already knew. Hanna wanted to keep him safe, keep him out of A's crosshairs, and it made him smile because it meant that she cared. She'd said she loved him but she'd made it sound like a throwaway comment, but she was so determined to keep him safe. She's adorable when she's all protective of me. Caleb smiled to himself. She was so damn determined to cling on to her reasoning though, even though they both knew it was pretty weak. He listened as Hanna couldn't bring her self to say what she'd do if he got hurt because of her. Aria was quick to reassure Hanna. Damn right I'll involve myself. Hanna was getting more distressed. He could hear it in her voice. He wanted to go in there and wrap his arms around her and tell her he'd be fine. To stop worrying, that he can take care of himself. To end this all and just…be Hanna and Caleb. But he stopped himself because Hanna started to say something, something about a dead body and he actually thought he'd heard wrong but Hanna was getting worked up and her voice was loud and clear.
"And now…now I killed someone and Caleb can't know, he can't, because if he found out he'd never look at me the same way again, I can't even look at me the same way again…I'm a murderer" Caleb heard Hanna start to cry, but he was too shocked to react. She killed someone? What the hell? I fall asleep for like…five minutes..okay maybe longer, and she goes out and kills someone? Oh Hanna, what did you do? He felt his heart break a little bit at Hanna's insistence that he'd not see her the same way. She'd always be Hanna to him. His Hanna. Whoever she killed…he was sure she had a reason. Hanna may have been going through a lot but she wasn't a stone cold killer. He was torn. Part of him wanted to charge in there, but….if he stayed still and listened…he might find out what the hell was going on. Sure Hanna would probably tell him…in her own time. But it wouldn't be anytime soon and Caleb needed to know what was going on so he could help her. Protect her. So he stayed rooted to the spot and listened, no matter how wrong he knew it was.
He listened as Hanna told Aria and Spencer that she knew Rollins was 'the one' he'd known it since that look as well, but he wasn't sure if Hanna had known, or if he'd even been right. Caleb had to brace both hands on the doorway and hold on to stop himself from rushing in to the room as Hanna spoke about her time in the barn. Hearing her sobs chipped away pieces of his heart. I should be in there with her…but she needs to talk to someone about this and if I go charging in there she'll clam up. He told himself. She talked about how dark it was, how scared she was and Hanna's episode in her room had a new meaning added to it. He couldn't imagine being in Hanna's place. How scared she must have been…she'd looked scared in that photo..but hearing her say she was scared..that was another thing entirely. He didn't like the way she said she could 'never get away' it was sending unpleasant images to his brain, and he had to shake his head to dislodge them.
"Maybe….maybe he…he….maybe when I was unconscious he…"
Caleb's knuckles went white where he grasped the doorframe. If he ever found out that bastard had done anything to her while she was unconscious…he would beat him until he was a bloody mess. Just the thought of him striking Hanna was enough to make him see red, let alone…anything else.
"I kept crying for help…crying for….you guys and for….for…for Caleb" Caleb felt his heart crack. She'd been…she'd been crying for him. And he had let her down. Hanna kept saying she was too screwed up and broken for him…and he didn't care. He'd told her he didn't care. But it was his fault that she was. He'd been the one encouraging her with the plan. He'd been the one that had lost her. He couldn't get the image of Hanna, alone and scared, and crying for him to help her, out of his head. He surfaced from his thoughts when he heard his name. He actually hadn't thought twice about Hanna's lack of clothing, he'd been too concerned for her and too occupied with getting her warm and safe. It was probably a good thing that he hadn't fully thought about it or he would have been…well….Rage was one word to describe it.
He could hear in Hanna's voice how far away she was from the room she was currently occupied, she was miles away. Back in the Barn. He wanted to shake Spencer when she started to press Hanna about what happened. He wasn't sure he wanted her to carry on. Not when he wasn't in there with her. Helping her. But he needed to know. Needed to know because every time he thought about it too hard, his imagination ran wild and his made up images haunted him. He just needed to know and Hanna needed to talk to someone about it. As Hanna started to describe the barn door opening, Caleb got a bad feeling and he swallowed hard. When she moved on to describe being sprayed by water…he felt his stomach drop. Ezra had said…explained. And Caleb knew. But hearing Hanna describe it in her wavering voice, hearing the tears in her voice…the sobs. Caleb felt himself getting choked up. He'd done this to her. This was his fault. He hadn't protected her and this had happened. His brain started to play a vision of Hanna, exactly as she described, crying out…begging Rollins to stop, but being hurt over and over again. He clenched his fists around the doorframe and gritted his teeth.
"He wouldn't stop and I…I…." Caleb leaned closer to the gap.
"What Hanna? You can tell us anything" Spencer reassured her. Silence. He held his breath.
"I wanted Caleb" Hanna sobbed. Caleb felt the air leave his lungs, felt like he'd been stabbed in the heart. A tear slowly started to slide down his cheek. He thought Spencer said something but he wasn't paying attention. Not until Hanna spoke again and his ears practically perked up.
"No matter how much I cried, or pleaded or begged he wouldn't stop and I kept….I kept wishing Caleb would come and…and…and save me but he didn't and Rollins he kept…" Caleb felt another tear make its way down his face. Hanna had wanted him. She'd been crying out for him. Wishing he was there. Wishing he'd saved her but he hadn't. He hadn't until right at the last minute. He hadn't been there. He hadn't saved her in time. He…he'd let her down so much. If he hadn't…he shouldn't have gone along with the plan. He shouldn't have let Hanna…..I didn't let Hanna do anything. She didn't really give me much choice. I still should have stopped her. Should have done something. Caleb's heart just broke. All he could see was Hanna, calling his name as she was shocked again and again. His hold on the doorframe was the only thing keeping him upright.
"Hanna I think you should stop, okay?" Caleb agreed with Aria. He wanted to know so he could help Hanna, but all he knew was how badly he screwed up. How do I make this up to her? Caleb didn't have long to dwell on his thoughts because as he listened he realised who it was Hanna had killed. She killed Rollins. Typical Hanna, the guy tortures her and she kills him and she feels bad about. Sometimes I think she has too good a heart. What Caleb heard next had him so angry, so full of rage that he wished he'd been the one to kill Rollins. Wished he'd gotten to do to him what he did to Hanna, right before he beat the ever loving crap out of him. Hanna had thought she was going to die…wanted to die. His Hanna…..had wanted to die to make it end.
"He pinned me and he…he…he pressed the rod to my back and he-he-he-he held it there. He held it there and he kept asking the same question over and over again…shouting…over and over again." Caleb wasn't sure if he'd just accidentally cracked the doorframe or not. He really didn't care either way. He'd seen the marks on Hanna, gotten a good look at them. He hadn't wanted to dwell on the specifics, but he knew exactly which mark Hanna was referring to. There where a few on her back but only one looked….deep. Angry. Like it had been inflicted over and over again….or like someone had held a cattle prod to her wet back. If Rollins were still alive, Caleb would have hunted him down then and there and…
"I said….that it was a good thing we didn't know who killed Charlotte because…because….I'd tell if I did. To make it stop…I just wanted it to stop. Even if it had been you….or….or you Aria or….or….or Caleb" Caleb hated hearing that pain in Hanna's voice. He wished she'd lied and said it was him. He'd have taken her place gladly to stop her from experiencing so much pain….suffering.
Caleb listened as Hanna gave voice to one of his biggest fears. He'd spent a lot of time picturing what could have happened if she hadn't gotten out…if he hadn't handed over Ali. It was enough to make sure he wouldn't sleep again if Hanna wasn't near him. Enough to make him never want to let her out of his sight. He listened, barely breathing as Hanna described killing Rollins. It was an accident. She'd braked. It didn't matter if there was a moment of hesitation. She'd braked. It wasn't her fault. But Hanna…his kind, big hearted Hanna….would still beat herself up, still lose sleep, still feel awful for killing him. Feel awful for feeling any little shred of satisfaction. Because that was who she is. No matter what he did to her. Caleb couldn't allow it. He should have burst in to that room way before now. Shouldn't have let Hanna sit there, reliving all of this without him by her side. Crying. He hated it when she cried.
"His blood was all over me and it feels like it still is, I feel like I'll never be clean again, like I'm tainted and if Caleb found out…if he found out he'd never look at me the same way again…he'd….he'd look at me like I'm a murderer like he doesn't even know me….he wouldn't look at me like I was Hanna anymore" Caleb was shaking his head and he heard Hanna started to sob harder. It was the final straw.
"How am I supposed to go back to my apartment….I….I…I don't even want him near me because I feel like….like if he touches me he'll be tainted too". Oh hell no. He and Hanna had been starting to get to a good place, he wasn't about to let some creepy ass doctor who deserved what he got come between them. Caleb didn't care if it was an accident or not. He couldn't believe Hanna would think so little of him but then after everything that had happened between them….New York for instance, he couldn't really blame her. He'd let her down again and again. Don't want me near you? Tough luck Hanna because I'm not letting you push me away. Caleb needed to get to Hanna. He shouldn't have stayed out here as long as he had, Hanna needed him. He shoved the door expecting it to fly open, but it didn't. It stopped and no matter how hard he shoved it wouldn't open. Then he remembered…the chain. Dammit.
"Hanna…it's me, open the door" Hanna calmed down as she registered Caleb's voice. As if it could have been Rollins, I hit him with my car and then buried him six feet under. Then she started to panic again. How long had be been out there…what had he heard? Hanna turned to Aria.
"You didn't…" Aria held her hands up.
"I really didn't. He must have decided to come looking, let's be honest, this isn't exactly a secret hide out" Hanna nodded, conceding the point. She swallowed, trying to make her voice sound normal.
"Caleb I can't..I can't talk right now. What do you want?"
"I want you to open the door so I can see you and have a conversation with you without however many inches of wood in the way"
"I'm fine Caleb. I'm sorry I left without telling you, I wanted to…to…to prove to myself I could and there was….the…the girls needed me. You can go now, I'll…I'll see you tomorrow"
"I figured. I was worried. But that's not the point Hanna. You're not fine. I know you're not, Hanna please. I…I need to see you" Caleb said imploringly.
"Go away Caleb" Hanna said, fresh tears starting to fall.
"No. Open the damn door Hanna, now" Caleb gave the door another shove, as Spencer braced it from the other side.
"Please go away Caleb. Please" Hanna couldn't have Caleb here. Not now. Not after she'd just killed someone. She couldn't be around him.
"Hanna please" Hanna could hear the anguish in his voice. "Please let me in, or I'll…I'll break the door down or or…"
"Woah. Okay, no. No damaging Spencer's barn" Spencer snapped at Caleb.
"I don't care about your stupid barn Spencer, I will do whatever it takes to get in there and-" Spencer rolled her eyes.
"We get it. Hold on" Spencer managed to close the door. Hanna stared at her. Caleb hammered on the door.
"Spencer no. You can't let him in…he can't…he can't see me like this…he…he…I can't….I can't be…I can't-" Hanna shot out of her seat and started to panic. Aria stood and rubbed her back.
"Han…I hate to break it to you but I think he…I think he might have heard some stuff" Hanna stared at Aria in horror.
"No..no he can't. He's just upset because I left and-" Spencer took the chain off the door. "Spencer no!" The door flew open and Caleb rushed in.
"Hanna!" Caleb's voice sounded strange…like he'd…like he'd been crying and when she examined his face Hanna could see tear tracks. Aria was right. He'd heard.
"No, no, no, no, no, no" Hanna cried, shaking her head and holding her hands up to keep him back. Caleb rushed to her, he didn't give her a chance to get away. As soon as he reached her he wrapped his arms around her as tightly as he could without hurting her and buried his face in her hair.
"Caleb no, let me go…don't…..don't….don't touch me, CALEB!" Hanna started to cry harder, trying to push at his chest. But Caleb wouldn't let her go. He couldn't. He just kept on holding her, not letting her go, not letting her get away. He ignored Aria and Spencer. He was entirely focused on Hanna.
"I am not going to be tainted Hanna. I don't care if you killed the bastard. I don't care if it was an accident or not. He had it coming. He tortured you and he was chasing down your friend to do God knows what. You saved her." he whispered in to her ear. "There is nothing you could do that would make me look at you differently Hanna, you will always be Hanna to me. My Hanna. I'm sorry that I didn't save you, that you where calling for me and I didn't answer. That will never happen again, I will always come for you, always save you. This is all my fault, I'm the one who let you down…lost you. I shouldn't have left in New York. I shouldn't have left at the resort I should have hidden under the bed or something. This is my fault, all of it." Caleb squeezed her tightly as he felt her sob. "For the record, if that bastard wasn't already dead, I'd kill him myself, you gave him much a quicker end than I would have" he growled. "And how many times do I have to tell you, I don't care if you're broken or damaged or whatever, I love you. Okay. I love you. No matter what. You need to stop pushing me away Hanna. I'm not leaving you again. I promise. You need me and I need you. We will get through this together okay?" He felt Hanna stop fighting, she sagged against him, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist. He sighed at the familiar and missed touch. He didn't know how long he stood there holding Hanna while she cried. But it was long enough for Spencer to disappear and do…whatever she had to do. He assumed she had some sort of plan. Caleb knew things weren't resolved, weren't fixed between he and Hanna. But this was a start. He knew everything, it was all out in the open and he could help Hanna and then….then when the time was right they could be together again. Properly. But for now….he'd be happy with just knowing that Hanna needed him. He kissed her hair.
"Guys. Hate to interrupt. Mona just texted me. She's done with the car, she's parked it at your apartment and she's about to head back to…." Aria swallowed, "…To the woods and pick up her car. She wants us to meet her at your apartment"
"She said she found something but I…I was too worried about Hanna to question her" Caleb admitted. "Han…not that I don't like the robe but..have you got anything to wear?"
"No. My clothes where….they…I didn't want them anymore" she mumbled in to his chest. Caleb looked up at Aria, "Can you grab a pair of Spencer's sweats or something?" Aria nodded. Caleb tried to step back from Hanna but she wouldn't let go. He allowed himself to enjoy it for a few seconds before gently pulling her off him. "We're gonna go home in a minute Han, but first you need to get dressed otherwise you'll freeze, okay" Hanna shrugged.
"I doubt I'd feel it. I don't think I'll ever be warm again" Caleb smirked. Running his hands down her arms.
"I'm sure I could help you with that…you know I run hot. Like your own personal hot water bottle, but for now…" he paused as he removed his hands from her and pulled his sweater over his head, his t-shirt briefly riding up. His smirk was firmly back in place as he caught Hanna looking. He handed her his sweater, "Here, put this on." He waited but she didn't move.
"Turn around" she mumbled.
"Really? What happened to 'it's nothing I haven't seen before'?" he teased. Apparently it was too soon for teasing because he got no response. He sighed and turned his back. When he turned back around Hanna was swamped in his sweater. He smiled at the sight. It wasn't long before Aria was back with a pair of leggings for Hanna to wear, and as soon as she'd put them on, they where ready to leave.
"Shoes?" Caleb asked. Aria shook her head. "Seriously? Those too? Weren't they like….Choo Miu or something?"
"That's not even a real designer Caleb. And they weren't Jimmy Choos or Miu Miu" Caleb smiled. Pleased to have gotten a reaction. She should know by now that he knew his war around her shoe collection.
"Okay then, I'll just have to do this" He said swinging her up in to his arms. "Ready Aria?" He said over Hanna's protestations. Aria smiled at the two of them and led the way out of Spencer's barn.
When they pulled up at Hanna's apartment, Mona was just arriving and started to pull in behind Caleb. Hanna had her door open and was waiting for Caleb to come and pick her up, as Aria walked past her open door, she made a grab for her arm, and Aria leaned in to hear what Hanna had to say.
"Will you…..will you tell Mona and Emily what I said? I can't….I don't think I can do it all again and I know they have questions and they…they deserve answers but…I can't.." Aria nodded.
"Of course Han" Aria rubbed her arm and gave her a small smile. Hanna just nodded in response as Caleb appeared next to Aria. Mona approached the group casually.
"Han…you okay?" she said, noticing Hanna was still in the car and looking a little worse for wear. "God, why do they keep dressing you in terrible clothes" Caleb rolled his eyes.
"That's my sweater"
"I know" Mona said with fake sympathy.
"I'm fine" Hanna said quietly. Mona decided not to push, and when she looked to Aria she saw the girl mouthing "Tell you later" at her. She nodded and then she happened to glance down at Hanna's feet.
"What happened to her shoes?"
"We got rid of them" Aria said pointedly moving her eyes to the side at Hanna. Mona cottoned on quickly.
"I really hope they weren't the pair I think they where." Mona sighed. "Well you're lucky I always have spares. I can't be fabulous in heels all the time" she said, going back over to her car and then returning with a pair of flats that she handed to Hanna. Once Hanna had them on and was out of the car, Mona led the way up to Hanna's apartment, the others following. Hanna sticking close to Caleb and occasionally knocking in to him as she tried to keep close without being too close.
"You can take my arm if you want. That way we can stop awkwardly bumping in to each other." He winked at her. She hesitated and then wrapped an arm around his. As soon as they made it to Hanna's apartment and through the front door Hanna made a beeline for the couch, grabbing her blanket…that wasn't where she left it…and settling herself back down. Caleb grabbed the spot next to her, making a grab for the blanket, so it was settled over both of them. Hanna looked at him.
"What? I'm cold. It's a really cold night and my t-shirt is thin" Hanna didn't look like she believed him but she didn't argue either. Aria perched on the arm of the couch, and Mona sat on the edge of the coffee table.
"What did you find out?" Caleb asked. "I would have asked earlier but.."
"But you where busy freaking out, I know. And I was busy getting a car windshield fixed"
"What?" Caleb asked.
"I was on my way to Hanna when you called the first time, I just didn't know it at the time. I was following the GPS I'd planted on his car when you asked me to look in to him and then Hanna called. The second time you called I knew where she was, I just didn't think Hanna would want me to tell you. I got there and….I was little too busy to answer your calls. Hanna was just sitting there, and then she insisted on helping bury the body and I took Lucas's car to a repair shop that I know and trust. I was a little too busy to take your calls and hold your hand through your little whiny moments. The windshield is fixed, the car is clean, like it never happened, FYI" Mona said conversationally. There was a brief stunned silence and then Caleb exploded.
"You let Hanna bury the body?!" Caleb cried.
"I didn't let her do anything" Mona said holding her hands up.
"I wanted to…needed to do it Caleb" Hanna said from her spot next to him, he looked down at her and then decided to drop it. He wasn't happy about it but now wasn't the time to rehash this. He looked at Mona and made a 'continue' motion with his hand.
"Shouldn't we wait for the others?" Aria interrupted before Mona could start.
"No. They have jobs to do. Besides we'll fill them in tomorrow when we all go for brunch"
"Brunch?" Aria said, confused.
"Yes. We're all going to have brunch, and be caught on camera acting normally as if nothing is wrong" Aria raised her eyebrows. "Can I continue now?" Mona asked. Aria just nodded.
"Thank you." Mona took a breath, "Elliott Rollins is dead" Mona said simply. Hanna flinched and Caleb put his arm around her.
"We know that, thank you Mona" Caleb said acidly.
"No, not that Rollins, the real Rollins. He's been dead for fifteen years"
"Wait….what?" Aria had to ask.
"I hacked the police database and ran his name. Things didn't add up so I did some more digging. The real Dr. Elliott Rollins died fifteen years ago at the ripe old age of 72…of a stroke"
"So the guy Ali married…the guy I…I killed…" Hanna trailed off and Caleb tightened his arm around her, rubbing her arm soothingly.
"He was a fraud. He stole the real Rollins identity and has been masquerading as him for the entire time he's been here…if not longer. I have no idea who he really is." Mona said with a hint of frustration.
"Oh God" Aria went pale.
"What?"
"Emily gave the file on Rollins to Toby to look in to and he…he said he would…if he finds the same thing Mona did…"
"He will" Mona said grimly.
Aria continued, "The police are going to look in to him. He's been masquerading as a doctor…treating people….they'll think he's run like we want everyone to think and they'll…they'll look for him. They'll be determined to track him down. We set Toby and by extension…the police….on the guy we just killed" Aria finished and stared at a spot on the floor.
"I told you. I told you we'd never get away with this" Hanna said quietly. "They won't…they won't stop until they've found him…found what we did…what I did"
"No…no it's fine. We have a plan. They'll never find him. They won't find him right?" Aria asked Mona.
"I think the better question is….who the hell did you bury tonight?" Mona asked. Hanna and Aria looked at each other, brows creased in confusion. The silence was interrupted by the sound of a phone ringing. Aria fished in her bag and pulled out her cell, checking the caller ID.
"It's Ezra" she murmured.
"That reminds me, with…everything last night, I forgot to ask you."
"You forgot something? So you are infallible after all" Caleb said snidely. Mona just gave him a look.
"Did you find his burner phone?"
"What burner phone?" Hanna and Aria said at the same time.
"He had a freaking burner phone and you didn't think to mention this earlier, like…I don't know….first?!" Caleb exclaimed.
"I told you. I forgot"
"You never forget anything" Caleb accused.
'I do when my best friend is practically catatonic and then insists on burying a body" Mona hissed. "I didn't realise until I was halfway to the repair shop, but nobody was answering their damn phones"
"Welcome to my world" Caleb said smugly, Mona shot him a glare.
"He didn't have it…..on him. I…I had to feel around for his badge and I….I didn't feel a second phone" Hanna broke in to their bickering.
"I'd have been surprised if it was on him"
"How…how do you know he had one?" Aria asked.
"I heard him talking on it all the time, but I couldn't hear who was on the other end. It was the only time he used his real accent. British" Mona looked at Caleb.
"The voice on the other end of the line to Mary….you said he had an accent…" Mona nodded. "Okay. tomorrow….we try and ping it, find out where it is, then we go get it and….deal with it." Caleb said decisively.
"It's like you read my mind" Mona purred.
"I'm coming too" Hanna interjected. Caleb looked like he was going to argue but Mona shook her head at him.
"Okay. We do this after your brunch or whatever"
"Agreed" Hanna, who's head had fallen on to Caleb's shoulder, let out a yawn.
"We should go" Aria finally roused herself from her thoughts.
"We'll see you tomorrow morning okay Hanna? Or…in a few hours actually" Mona said, giving Hanna a quick hug, followed by Aria, before the pair made their way out of the apartment.
Caleb moved his head to look down at Hanna.
"You must be exhausted, let's get you to bed okay Han?" Hanna just nodded and he helped her to her feet. She hugged his arm the entire walk through to her bedroom. Caleb threw back the covers on the bed and manoeuvred her on to it, extracting his arm from her grip, then Hanna settled herself back against the pillows. Once she was comfortable, Caleb pulled the blankets over her and tucked her in.
"I don't think I'm going to be able to sleep Caleb" Hanna whispered.
"I'll leave the light on" Caleb reassured, stroking her hair.
"No, it's not that, it's just..every time I close my eyes I see….I see things, and now what happened tonight is going to be added to that, I'll just keep seeing his….he…he went through the windshield right in front of me and I couldn't move…I couldn't look away I just kept staring in to his eyes and he…he…he was…" Hanna started swiping at her face as she started to cry. Caleb sat on the bed next to her.
"Hanna-"
"That's all I'll see when I close my eyes, that and…and the barn.. and the…the only way I feel safe enough to sleep is…if…if….y-" Hanna cut herself off and swallowed. She shouldn't do this…shouldn't ask. But she couldn't help herself. "Will you….will you stay with me? Please?" Hanna asked quietly. Caleb stared at her for a few moments and then nodded.
"Of course" he said gently. "Let me lock up first okay?" Hanna nodded and Caleb did a circuit of the apartment making sure everything was switched off, all the windows where closed and the front door was locked. Then he returned to Hanna's room. He walked around to the other side of the bed, moved the covers back and slid in, making himself comfortable. Hanna rolled over to face him and buried her head in his chest, and Caleb automatically brought his arms around her.
"You can't be comfortable sleeping in that" Hanna murmured.
"Doesn't matter, I'll be fine" he said, Hanna made a sound of disagreement but was too tired to argue.
"Goodnight Caleb" she mumbled in to his chest. He smiled.
"Night Hanna, I love you" Caleb whispered and tightened his arms around her before closing his eyes. He fell asleep with a smile on his face.
Hanna finally felt herself drifting off to sleep. With Caleb there…she felt like she was safe, safe enough to sleep, like he'd keep the nightmares away. She wasn't afraid to close her eyes if he was there with her. It was stupid, Caleb had no control over her brain, but with him there, with his arms around her like a barrier to everything else…she felt like things would be okay. She'd be okay. Like she wouldn't see Rollins face, or wouldn't end up back in the barn. She snuggled in to his arms a little bit more and finally let sleep take her.