-1Chapter Nine: Fight
Quistis could feel it more than anything, the tension that signaled trouble was coming. The feeling was heavy in the air; it was actually a little hard to breathe. She rolled out of bed to see beautiful rays of sunlight spilling into her room. It actually wasn't as cold as it could have been (in Trabia standards) and everything seemed calm. It was always too perfect before something went horribly wrong. She quickly made her way to the bathroom and changed into a black dress, one of the few things she could still fit into comfortably.
She could feel Ultimecia in the back of her mind, excited for bloodlust. She pushed her as far away as she could, not wanting to think about the woman. Quistis moved as quickly as she could down the hallway, wanting to call out but afraid to do so. Relief flooded through her tired body when she saw Seifer seated on the couch, leaning back and looking like a well-disguised wreck. He smiled easily at her, as if it were just any other day. She tried to return it, but she felt a grimace tug at her face instead.
"I've been scanning," He told her, standing just as she sunk onto the couch. "but you know my limit's only about two miles." She nodded as he wandered into the kitchen.
It would have been nice to just sit together for a bit. She thought, but understood why it couldn't be like that at the moment. She took a breath, shoving both her mother and images of a dead Rinoa from her mind as she cast a scan spell throughout the lands. She glimpsed through the rocky terrain, and gasped when she made out the figures of Squall, Irvine, Selphie and Zell making their way in. She dissolved the spell, and when she opened her eyes she found Seifer standing in front of her with a couple of pieces of toast. She held her hand out, and he gave them to her.
"They're about five miles south." She said, nervously ripping a piece in half. "Coming our way." He heaved a great sigh, putting a gloved hand to his temple.
"Eat your toast."
"Seifer, I can't-"
"Eat your toast, then we're gonna head out." He told her. "I'd prefer it if they didn't know where we were hidden." She stood up.
"I'll eat on the way." she said. Seifer knew better than to argue, and he made his way to the door. Quistis followed, using various home-made magic to ease the pains in her body. She was feeling much better, as fit as she was before she was pregnant, and could easily keep up with Seifer.
"Been saving that?" He asked her, noticing her ease. They stepped out of the door and into the cool morning.
"Yeah. I didn't want to waste it and not have anything when it mattered." She shrugged.
"Is it safe?" He asked, glancing at her. Quistis started a slow jog, but Seifer held her back. They set off on a brisk walk.
"Of course." She replied. "It's all cure based magic."
"And you're sure it's stable, safe for my boy?" He asked.
"Our little girl is just fine." She answered, and managed to give him a weak smile. They walked on in silence for a few moments, and Quistis was even able to lie to herself; she let herself believe that she and Seifer were a normal couple, living together in a perfect little house and out for a nice hike. Something or another would have ruined the delusion, so she wasn't too upset when Seifer did.
"Are you going to give me the magic?" He asked quietly, and for the first time his eyes didn't meet hers. Quistis stared straight ahead, watching a bird fly overhead.
"So you really think it has to come down to that?" She wanted to know.
"I do, I really do." He answered, following her gaze to the bird. She sighed.
"Only if you promise me you'll use it as a last resort. If there's a way around this…"
"Of course." He nodded, finally looking at her. "I don't like to kill, Quistis. Especially not former allies." She stopped, and he stopped beside her.
"I really hope we don't have to." She whispered before calling upon the magic. It glowed on her fingertips, and she beckoned Seifer's gunblade closer. He held it up, and she slid her thin fingers across its blade. They both watched as it sunk into the metal. The Hyperion looked the same, but Quistis could feel a coldness lurking inside of it, and she shuddered away from it. Seifer looked at it with a renewed respect, and Quistis started walking again. He fell into step beside her.
Quistis kept scanning the area around her, watched as slowly, the miles passed. She knew she had to say it to him, she knew she did, but saying so was practically admitting defeat.
"They're coming up, huh?" He said with that over-confident grin that she loved.
"Yes." She said in a small voice. "Seifer?" He looked at her, but didn't stop walking. "I just want to say, in case we don't make it-"
"Don't." He cut her off. "Quistis, don't talk like that."
"No, Seifer, you need to hear it-"
"We're not going to die!" He yelled out of nowhere, and she could feel the vibrations from his voice resonating in her bones. "You understand, Quistis, I will do anything to make sure we get out of this alive, we're not going to die!" He stood right where he was, shoulders heaving and panting wildly. She felt small and helpless next to him.
"I love you, Seifer." She told him, hoping it wouldn't be for the last time. His shoulders drooped, and he looked both scared and ashamed.
"I know that." He told the ground. "I know." Before she could say anything he scooped her up in his arms and hugged her gently.
"I promise, Quistis, we will get through this, some way or another." He spoke softly into her hair, and she took deep breaths to keep the tears from spilling over. Just as suddenly as he'd grabbed her, he put her down, and she began to walk. They both continued in silence. She grabbed his hand.
"They're about half a mile away." She said, feeling nauseated. Half a mile away was her worst fears. Half a mile away was were she'd have to face her sins. Half a mile away was where she could lose everything. He didn't say anything, didn't even nod, but she saw his throat twitch as he swallowed.
She saw them from afar, four figures ranging in size and style, yet all united in their goal to tear her world apart. She knew they could see her and Seifer, but no one sped up, no one slowed down. Each group regarded the other with complete emptiness until they were only about five feet apart.
Zell and Irvine were standing at the ends, with Squall and Selphie in the middle. Quistis and Seifer stood right in front of them. Quistis' breath caught in her chest when she saw Squall, and she felt her heart skip a beat. She also felt her mother grow horribly happy when she caught sight of Selphie, but she pushed those out of place emotions away from her. For a while, they all just stared at each other, and Quistis wasn't sure of what to do when Squall began to speak.
"It doesn't have to be like this," He said, his cold eyes unreadable. "If you just come back quietly, there doesn't have to be bloodshed."
"You mean none of your blood has to be shed." Seifer snarled. "We're not stupid, we know what's gonna happen to us if we go with you."
"Why can't you just leave us?" Quistis pleaded, and Selphie dropped her head to the ground, unable to look her in the eyes. "You can just pretend you couldn't find us, we won't do anything-"
"You killed Rinoa!" Zell yelled, and neither Seifer or Quistis tried to deny it. "You think you can just kill her and live the rest of your life pretending it never happened? Like it was all okay?"
"He's right." Squall said evenly, looking from Quistis to Seifer and back to Quistis. "You two can't just walk free with blood on your hands."
"Squall," Selphie gasped, and Quistis saw that Selphie was looking at her large stomach. "Squall, we can't, look." She pointed at Quistis' stomach.
Squall said something, but Quistis couldn't hear it. Her whole world seemed to fade into a fuzzy static.
She's so compassionate. Ultimecia's voice filled her head. She will make a good body, don't you think? It took Quistis only a few seconds to figure out what she was talking about.
No, no, you can't! Don't! It was an awful feeling, like being pushed into a small, dark hole and unable to get out. Just like with Rinoa.
NO! She shrieked, but her mouth curved into a wicked smile.
"You!" Squall yelled, and he and his comrades began pulling out their weapons. Seifer had his gunblade at the ready, but with a lazy flick of her hand, Squall was slammed to the floor, screaming in agony. The screams sounded throughout the snowy wasteland, traveling miles off of the white surface. They were all frozen, watching with horror as blood streamed out from his scar, floating in midair beside Quistis. Squall was becoming paler by the second. His friends tried to cast cures on him, but it had no effect. The blood was becoming more solid, revealing a man with tanned skin, dark, wild hair and cold, amber eyes. Squall lay still in the snow.
"Griever," Quistis heard herself say, and the man smiled a twisted smile. Without so much as shifting her glance from the man, she made a grabbing motion with her right hand, and Selphie's eyes went blank. Zell was casting another cure spell on Squall, but Seifer lunged at him.
"Selphie!" Irvine screamed, pulling out his gun and shooting at Quistis. She snapped, and the bullet dropped in midair. The sorceress yanked her hand away from Selphie, and they saw a wispy vapor escape from her mouth. Selphie remained suspended in the air, her face void of any expression.
"No!" Irvine's anguished cries brought Quistis back to the front of her mind, but she felt Ultimecia leaving her body. She was flocking to Selphie…
No, that couldn't happen, she couldn't let that happen. She heard Zell and Seifer clashing to her right, but she couldn't see how they were doing. She reached out with her mind, trying to find Selphie. Everything around her darkened until she was standing in the center of the universe. She ignored the beautiful swirls of color and the serenity of the stars and kept searching for Selphie.
She saw her limp form being dragged off by the Cherubs. And she couldn't be sure, but she thought she saw…Rinoa? Yes, they were both there, too far away to get a hold of, but there all the same. The cherubs were giggling, flying away.
"Stop!" They glanced back at her, all glee gone from their chubby faces. They stopped, their feathery wings still flapping, but only to suspend them. "I command you to bring them-" Her voice was drowned out by the sound of a gunshot. Burning pain brought her back into reality, and she looked down to see a bullet hole in her shoulder. She gasped sharply in pain.
"You son of a bitch!" Seifer yelled, knocking Zell over with the hilt of his gunblade before charging at Irvine. The fighter lay crumpled on the ground, Selphie was weakly suspended, the blood-made Griever was hovering near her…
"Seifer, don't!" Quistis screamed. Irvine shot at Seifer, but he dodged the lightning fast bullets and ran aggressively towards the cowboy. Irvine was intent at keeping him at a distance, and fire blossomed from his hand to shoot at him. Seifer charged anyways, and neither men noticed the malicious grin that had sprouted on Selphie's face, or Griever's cold satisfaction.
Irvine was just seconds away from calling on a Guardian Force, but Seifer lunged, stabbing him straight through his heart. He kept pushing, driving through until it skewered Selphie's delicate body.
"You…bastard." Selphie said in a sinister voice that was not her own. If there was anything Quistis had wished for at the time, it was that Irvine had not heard Ultimecia speak. However, she saw his usually calm green eyes widen in shock before the glow of life faded from them. Seifer pulled out his gunblade, and the couple fell to the ground, Selphie landing on Irvine. With Ultimecia gone, Griever's form shook, not able to keep himself stable. The blood rained and soaked into the snow, staining it red.
About to breathe a shaky sigh, Quistis looked around and noticed that Squall's body was missing. She glanced around for him, but before she could locate him, she felt a slashing numbness. She screamed, screamed endlessly and looked to see that he'd sliced down her shoulder. He looked down her with disgust, telling her silently that she deserved it.
No…no, I don't. she thought frantically, wanting to tell him everything. She heard Seifer's cry of outrage before his gunblade slashed into Squall's side. He bent, even staggered, but his hold on his gunblade didn't waver, and he thrust it deeper into her chest.
"NOW!" He screamed, and Quistis watched with horror as Zell jumped onto Seifer's back. Seifer tried to pull his gunblade out of Squall, but in a horrifyingly quick movement Zell had snapped his neck. Quistis shrieked as Seifer's body went tumbling to the ground. He landed with an empty thud.
"Seifer, Seifer, no! NO!" She yelled, hardly noticing as Squall savagely pulled his gunblade out before falling to his knees. She let her injured arm dangle as she pulled herself towards Seifer, but Zell blocked her way.
"Just give up already! You lost, face it!" He spat, shaking from the adrenaline and shock. He glanced towards Selphie and Irvine, but couldn't handle the sight of them and went back to glowering at Quistis.
"I don't want to do anything, I just want to hold him." Quistis sobbed. "Please…" But Zell only shook his head.
"…back up." She heard Squall struggle to say into his communicator. Apparently he had someone else coming. He winced before casting a curing spell on himself. He was still many shades too pale. "I don't care, we have four dead and a Sorceress." He said the last word with absolute loathing, but Quistis didn't care. Seifer was gone. She'd murdered her friends. She was about to be frozen for an eternity. She couldn't meet any of their gazes, just kept looking at Seifer's crumpled form. None of them said anything, even when a large ship with Esthar's design flew into view.
So this is it. she thought without any feeling. This is how it ends for me. She saw lots of people flooding from the ship, not all of them soldiers. She was aware of them approaching the dead, rolling them onto stretchers and loading them onto the ship, so mechanical, as if their lives had meant nothing. She watched them take her Seifer away, hiding him from her with a crisp white sheet.
"I thought you said there were four dead?" Quistis turned to see an older man talking to Squall, who was clutching at his wound with his hand. He answered through his teeth.
"There's one more in our ship." He breathed out. Why was he still hurt? It didn't matter. Nothing mattered.
"Squall!" Laguna was running towards him, but before he could reach him, Squall fell over, shaking in silent pain.
Quistis felt herself being pushed, and all of a sudden she was on her back. She stared up at the soldier's cold face, not caring. They strapped her in until it hurt to breathe, all of them towering over her until they lifted her. She didn't care.
Zell watched, terrified as Squall gasped for breath. What had Quistis done to him? He hated her, he hated her more than he'd ever hated anyone. Well, she was tied with Seifer for that spot, actually.
"Somebody get Odine!" Laguna ordered, and a couple of soldiers rushed past Quistis' stretcher and onto the ship. Just as quickly, some other soldiers were easing Squall onto a stretcher. Zell and Laguna walked alongside him, right behind Quistis' stretcher.
"Come on, Squall, you can't die now." Zell found himself pleading. "Everyone else is gone, not you too man."
The old scientist was waiting in the small room, and Squall was lowered onto a small bed.
"Vere vas he hit?" Odine asked.
"His side, the right." Zell answered, and a medic hastened to remove Squall's jacket and shirt. The skin was healed, but his veins showed black under his pale skin, inky darkness spreading rapidly throughout his body.
"I've never seen anyzing like zis." Odine breathed, fascinated. Zell wanted to punch him in the face.
"Well, do something!" Zell yelled. Laguna was looking down at Squall, his face horrified. Odine looked at Zell, his expression so nonchalant that it took everything Zell had not to strangle him.
"Zere is nothing I can do." He replied simply. "He probably only az an hour to live, at max." Thick tears started running down Laguna's face, and he let out a broken sob. Zell had always thought he'd looked young for his age, but staring at him then, he looked centuries old with grief.
"I…I want to die alone." Squall said, his eyelids fluttering. Laguna shook his head.
"Come on, Squall, don't be like that." Zell was close to crying himself. "You're the last one, I'm your friend-" Squall shook his head.
"It's how…she died." He said quietly, his voice cracking at the end of his sentence. "It's…how I want…to die." A heavy silence descended on the room. Finally, Laguna nodded.
"I understand. I had really wanted to talk to you, but I won't make you bear anything more." He said sadly. Squall only closed his eyes in response. Odine walked out of the room, followed by Laguna. Zell wanted to say something, anything as he walked out, but nothing came to him. The door clicked behind him with a deadly finality.
I should have told him goodbye. He thought. I should have said I'd miss him, that he was the best leader I could have asked for, that for a while I was even jealous of him…Odine continued down the hall to whereabouts unknown, but Laguna turned to the young man.
"I think you should be with Quistis right now." He said quietly, struggling to talk through the tears.
"No. I hate her, she murdered them all." He answered bitterly, but Laguna already had his arm. He was too shocked to resist.
"As soon as this ship lands, you're never going to see her again." He told him as he led Zell down the hall. "You're not going to want to remember her like this."
Before Zell could protest he was pushed into a room, and he heard the door lock behind him. He could see Quistis' weak form in a small bed, looking small and pitiful.
"Great, Squall's dying alone in the other room, and here I am with you." Zell snarled. Quistis didn't so much as glance in his direction. Nothing that he said could possibly matter…but then she felt a kick in her stomach. Coming back to life, she glanced down. Her baby, Seifer's baby was still alive. She couldn't doom her child to the same fate that she had, she needed to save it some way or another. But she didn't have enough strength to do it on her own.
If you're still there, I need your help to save my child. she thought. At first there was no reply, but then she heard Ultimecia's voice answer.
Of course. Was all she said, and she felt a little bit of strength, just enough, flood into her. She cast a special sort of Haste on her child, feeling it rapidly swell beneath her skin. Her body couldn't keep up, and she felt a rib snap.
"Wh-what are you doing!?" Zell yelled, but she couldn't give him any attention yet. She put layer upon layer of protection on her child, and when she was sure it was strong, she cast another customized spell on her hand, making it sharp as a blade. She braced herself with her other hand as she cut through first her clothes, and then her stomach until there was a sizable slit. Zell was completely silent as she lifted her baby out and cut its umbilical cord. She cast a cure spell on herself, just enough to sew the wound together before cradling her baby to her. It was crying.
"Zell, I know I have no right to ask you for anything." She said in a tired, hoarse voice. "But this baby has done nothing to deserve death or a frozen eternity." Blue eyes met blue eyes. "Please, Zell, take care of my child."
"Why the hell should I?" He retorted. "So it can finish off everyone else? You're full of it, Quistis." She swallowed back the hurt before replying.
"Look, Zell, it's a boy." The infant didn't stop crying. "Boys can't inherit sorceress magic, you know that. Please, Zell, he didn't do anything to anyone."
For a few minutes there was only the sound of the baby's scared cries. Zell shook his head, taking a deep breath.
"I'll make sure it lives." He muttered.
"That's not good enough, Zell." Quistis said weakly. "Promise me, promise me you'll raise him."
"Fujin and Raijin will be happy to raise it." He said with a bitter edge."
"You know they wouldn't be allowed to! It's too fishy with Seifer and…" She had choked after saying Seifer's name.
"I can't do that, Quistis, you can't ask me to-"
"Do you remember how lonely the orphanage was, Zell?" She was crying now, tears following the delicate curve of her cheeks. "Don't you remember wishing you had parents, someone that would tell you everything was okay? I don't want that for him, Zell."
"Quistis…"
"Please." She pleaded. Zell could hear the plane beginning to land. He heaved a great sigh. Was Squall dead by now?
"Alright." Zell said.
"Promise me." She said, although she sounded a lot more relieved.
"I promise." She held out the crying baby, and he took it. He cried harder, as if he knew he'd never see his mother again.
"What do I call him?" Zell asked her, but the door opened behind him, and four soldiers came in. Zell moved quickly, dashing around them before they could even glimpse the baby.
"I think you know what his name is." She answered quietly before she was moved onto another stretcher. Zell walked quickly, trying to depart from the ship, but he ran into Laguna. He regarded them with watery eyes.
"And just how are you going to keep him?" Laguna asked, looking only at the wailing baby. Zell turned away from the older man, into a protective stance.
"What, you think he needs to die?" He asked dangerously. Laguna only looked sadder.
"No…no. A child shouldn't have to pay for the mistakes his parents made." He said, looking at the baby with a deep hurt. He paused, looking stuck. "Come on, he's going to need a bath." Zell hesitated.
"You're going to let me keep him?"
"Not only that, I'm going to make sure you can keep him." Laguna gave a very shaky smile before turning. Zell finally followed, looking down at the baby.
"You're all I've got left." He whispered to him. He remembered everyone that he'd lost within the past couple of days, and he finally shuddered, shaking with the uncontrollable sobs. However, he stayed strong for the baby in his arms.
Quistis went back into her numb state as she was lifted off the ship. She glimpsed the back of Zell, and heard her baby crying. He had healthy lungs.
I've done all I can for you. I love you She thought, closing her eyes. Zell will tell you that someday.
Quistis was no longer aware of the harsh bobbing as the soldiers walked from place to place. She was summoning the last of her magic to let her see him, even if it was just an illusion.
She was walking outside of their house, but it wasn't snowing anymore. She looked up, and warm rays of sunshine fell on her porcelain face. She looked forward, and there he was, sitting under the oak tree that they'd never seen in bloom. It was grand and beautiful, its many branches full of green leaves.
He was leaning against the bark, eyes closed. He heard her coming, and he smiled, patting the spot next to him. She returned the smile, walking to where he was. She fell onto the fresh grass, inhaling the clean air. She leaned against him, and she felt his strong arm around her slender shoulders.
"What now?" He asked.
"We wait." She said, looking down the mountains. "We wait for our little boy."
"It's all set." One of the scientists said. A young soldier strapped her into the cold metal, grimacing whenever he touched her bloody skin.
"Should I wake her up?" He asked. One of the scientists shook his head.
"No, I've seen this before." He murmured. "She's just making it a little easier for herself."
"I love you, did I tell you that before we danced our last dance?" Seifer asked her. She shook her head.
"I already knew." She felt his soft lips on hers.
End Chapter
A/N: well, I felt about ten times worse writing this chapter than I did the last. I was so tempted to let Quistis be able to drag Selphie and Rinoa back, and to make everything okay, but it just didn't match with what I'd originally planned. I KNOW there will be a lot of anger/flaming, I expect it by now. There will be one more chapter, an epilogue. You don't have to read, but it will be there if you're interested in Quistis and Seifer's son. Thanks for sticking with this story, and I'll appreciate any comments you might want to leave.
Playlist
(For this story, I was constantly listening to music. Here's what I was inspired me)
Stop and Stare by One Republic- listened to this when writing Squall and Quistis' argument, surprisingly.
When I'm Gone by Eminem- listened to this when I was writing anything that had to do with Seifer. For some reason, Eminem reminds me of Seifer. I told my sister that, and she was like: Eminem is SO not gangster!
3 AM by Eminem- REALLY dark stuff. Inspired me when killing off the characters : (
Numb by Linkin Park- whenever Quistis was conflicted.
Leave Out All the Rest by Linkin Park- Depressing. I listened to this the whole last chapter.