Fictionnaire: Crockettsgirl told me not to say this but I must say I have to thank crockettsgirl for this chapter. She's really good and talented and has many great ideas. I love this chapter and mainly because of… She's standing right behind me isn't she?
Crockettsgirl headslaps fictionnaire: Told you not to say anything
Fictionnaire: Ow! Hey! What are you doing here?
Crockettsgirl: I'm here to kill me some bunnies
Fictionnaire: The hell you are
Fictionnaire chases Crockettsgirl around.
Tony: Now there's something you don't see everyday.
Tony open and closed his hands. Who was he trying to kid? Who were they trying to kid? He'd never been able to bring people back. How can people have such faith in him when he had so little? Tony leaned forward again and watched a nurse do a routine check up. Of course Steve Borden said he had told the Nurses not to react anyway. Still he felt ashamed to show he was weak.
"I know this is terrible," Tony swallowed. "Please come back to us Boss. This worked for me when I was at death's door. So… You will not die, you got that? After what you said to me I won't let you die on me," he thought about it for a moment as he watched the machines. There was no change… No miracle. No response. "I knew it," he said in a defeated tone.
Ah the hell with this he thought. "I can't do it… I'm not you. When you said I was always your son, I never said that you were always my dad. My real father treated me like a pair of shoes or something not as a person. Just an object that can be tossed around if needed. But you, you showed me I was worth the effort. You cared for me Boss. You were the first one to show me I was a person. I know you're a marine and all and tough and all that… But I love you Gibbs," Tony felt his voice breaking. He needed time to compose himself. How pathetic did it sound? It was difficult to keep the tears from flowing.
Gibbs was still playing the game of Pictionary when he studied his hand. Something felt funny. It felt as if someone had grasped his left hand. "Daddy," Kelly laughed. "Did you forget what you're going to draw?" Shannon and Kelly giggled. Gibbs gave a fake dejected look.
"No it's just," Gibbs voice was interrupted by a distant voice. The voice's heart cried out and tore him in two. He knew it was Tony's voice and it sounded so broken. He could see that Shannon and Kelly had heard it to.
Tony's breathing hitched as he sniffled. He doubted that any of it was helping. There was no change. "I know you're not one for apologies Boss. But I'm sorry I screwed up. I allowed you to go in without the vest. I didn't make you wear it," Tony lowered his head. That'd be a move he'd be kicking himself over and over. "I got someone else killed. That was my fault. I should've done better. I wanted to make you proud. That's all," he was losing the fight to hold his emotions in check.
Shannon saw the torment in Gibbs' eyes as he listened to the voice calling him. She hugged him as they both listened to the sadness in his voice. She wanted Gibbs to stay with Kelly and her. But this proved that Gibbs' heart will always be somewhere else. Shannon rested her head on his shoulder and massaged his back. "Go to him Jethro," she said sadly. "Go back to him," she wanted him with her so much but not like this.
"But," Gibbs managed to find his voice again.
"He needs you," Shannon told him. "Listen to him, he's feeling so guilty. We love you and do want you here with us but it's obvious you still belong there… Not here," she told him trying to swallow the tears. "Go to him my love," she said.
"I don't want to lose you two again," Gibbs responded. He was clearly torn between his two families. "I don't want to abandon you," he couldn't believe that he was even considering it.
"You're not… We'll be here when it is your time," Shannon told him. She held Gibbs' face to face her. "I know you're not good with words Jethro. But tell him again. Tell him you think of him as a son. Make him believe it Jethro," she instilled the words to him. "You need him like he needs you. I think you know you two have saved each other," she said.
There was a tug at his arm and he bent down to face his daughter. Kelly looked at him. "I understand Daddy. I really do. You have to help him. He's such a nice man, he's like a brother and you have to help him," she said trying to put up a brave face.
Gibbs had lowered his head. Kelly was smart and articulate and trying to be brave. "I can't," he raised his head and felt the tears streaming down his face. It was so hard to have to decide.
"It's the right thing to do Jethro and you've always done the right thing," Shannon said. "And there's so much good you still can do," she told him. "Just remember what we've said. "I love you."
"I love you to Shannon," Gibbs told her.
"I love you too daddy," Shannon held him tightly in a hug.
"I love you as well princess," Gibbs hugged her back. He still felt heartbroken about leaving them once again. But damn it, they were right. They were always right.
"We'll be waiting for you," Shannon said.
Gibbs got in one last big hug with them before they faded and he was covered in the mist. As he turned around his foot kicked something hard. He looked down and saw he was dressed in his camouflage fatigues and he reached down and shouldered the rifle and donned the hat. He headed back.
Tony rested his head on Gibbs' hand. He'd managed to regain some composure. His vision had become blurry as it struggled to see past the water that was welling up in his eyes. "I want you, I need you… I love you," Tony said as he held onto his hand as if doing that would stop him from fading.
Gibbs could hear the slight sobbing coming from beside him. He was still lying in darkness. He carefully opened his eyes. Gibbs could hear the sound of the heart monitor beeping. There was something attached to his left hand and he attempted to pull his hand away to see what it was.
Tony sniffled as Gibbs' hand tried to move. Tony's first instinct was to hold it firmly in place, he wasn't going to allow Gibbs to disappear from his touch. He heard someone clear their throat and he raised his head. "Boss?" Tony asked. The eyes looked at him. "Boss can you understand me? Do you know who I am? Do…" he began to say as Tony jumped to his feet.
"I was shot, DiNozzo not hit in the head," Gibbs noted that Tony hadn't let go of his deathgrip of his hand.
"You're awake… You're alive… You're," Tony shouted. He tried to reach the call button from where he was. Tony's mind raced, he had to call the nurses, he had to go and tell Ducky he couldn't let go of Gibbs.
"You can let go now DiNozzo," Gibbs said. He swallowed, his mouth was so dry. "I'm not going anywhere," Gibbs assured the younger man who seemed to be going frantic. Tony looked at him, he looked as if he didn't believe that. "I'm not going anywhere Son. Oh and I love you too son," Gibbs said. He could feel himself getting the nod from Shannon.
Tony pressed the call button. "What? Why? Oh my God!" Tony's face went as white as a sheet. "You heard that? You heard everything? I'm sorry Boss. It was just… Boss, I know but I meant every word of it," he sounded embarrassed. "Ducky told me something about patients on the brink and that. Well something anyway… Where were you?" He asked to change the subject.
"I don't remember," Gibbs said. That was a lie. Of course he remembered it vividly. But Tony didn't need to know the details.
"Oh, I got to tell Ducky… I got to call everybody," Tony looked to the door and back to Gibbs. "I got to," he thought as he slumped to the chair. "I have to notify everybody. I have to close the case. I have to do the reports. You have to be ok," Tony just suddenly felt overwhelmed and began crying into the sheets. He couldn't stop himself from losing it. The shoulders felt like they had everything on them.
Gibbs reached his hand over to Tony and rested his hand on the back of Tony's neck. "Why do you think I've been so good at delegating?" Gibbs said as he noticed Steve Borden walk quietly into the room. "Can you give us a moment?" Gibbs asked and waited for the doctor to leave. "Hey… You did great as team leader," he told him. Gibbs knew that the current outburst was just exhaustion and relief mixing.
"I got Agent Walker killed," Tony didn't look up.
"No… I know he was over at Vance's house with his agents. He was killed in the line of duty by those bastards," he knew that he must've been killed by them at Vance's house. He could safely assume that.
Tony shook his head and went to say something but quickly closed his mouth. "I have to get checked out by the doctors. There's one waiting at the door impatiently," Gibbs said. "Get Ducky to take you home so you can rest," he ordered his senior field agent.
"But there's something else I have to do," Tony said. Truth be told… Tony just didn't dare leave Gibbs' side.
"Nothing that can't wait," Gibbs told him. "Now, go," he ordered.
"On it Boss," Tony responded.
Fictionnaire: Alright this was a short chapter. But I think I needed some relief. Alright… So every doctor in Bethesda has a famous name. Doctor Steve Borden is actually the same name as the Wrestler known as Sting. Hence the bat joke. Hey! Why is everyone crying? It wasn't that bad was it?
(Tony, Gibbs, Abby, Ducky, McGee and Ziva are wiping their eyes)
Fictionnaire: Alright… Hey! Alright who put a padlock on my bunny cage. A digital 9 digit lock? Retinal scanner? Fingerprint scanner? Now isn't this a bit of an overkill crockettsgirl? Oh and you all didn't think I was going to kill Gibbs off did you?