So here it is, some much needed answers to questions in your mind. I hope this chapter gives you a little of what you have been asking for.

Now I know I have no beta and I make a lot of mistakes and I want to apologize for that. Often times I am writing late at night and trying to type as quickly as possible to get the words running through my brain out on paper as fast as I can. I have three daughter and have to make time to write since the 2 year old is extremely bossy. She is continuously giving the 15 and 11 year detailed orders. I swear she's 2 going on 20 and if you have ever had a 2 year old around you would understand. You would think since she's the third one I'd have this down pat, but nope, they all throw a curve and are different in their own way.

So back to what I was saying, not only am I on the run with the kids, but I work full time in customer service. Listening to complaints for 8 hours a day can get to you especially since some of the whining is from other co-workers as well. Needless to say by the end of the day I have to let it roll off my back or I will go nuts. Probably why I insist that in the house we have a dance party while cooking dinner and after while doing the dishes. Part of my stress relief. We all have one right?

Lastly I have a husband that is 6'4 and was a professional wrestler. He is the only male in the house other than the cat and dog, (both snipped so do they really count), we are testosterone deficient in the family as it is. Yes I have taken a bump in the ring and been put in a figure four leg lock just to prove that I could take it. The stipulation was that I could hit him with a steel chair (it was awesome) just so he could let out a little steam. Yes he is my 4th child. What I'm getting at is I am trying to keep the mistakes to a minimum and obviously not doing well at it. Sorry peeps. I'll use spell check more often. I promise. Ok I promise to try.

Oh yeas and one other thing. There is a reference to a miscarriage in here so if anyone is sensitive to it I do apologize for it. It's not an easy thing and I have lived it a few times so if it stirs up memories for you than just know we can cry together.

So just so we're clear I can only dream of owning Arrow, but I do own all the mistakes I made writing this. Love to you all and thank you for reading and taking the time to comment. Xxoo

Chapter 11

Broken

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Laurel and Tommy had picked the Starling Plaza for their wedding. In truth, they didn't have much of a choice since it was the only place large enough to hold all the guests. The press had labeled this as the event of the year and Malcolm Merlin was sparing no expense. He had booked the entire top floor for the bridal party, making it easier for them to prepare for the wedding.

Laurel and Tommy agreed to pose for some photos after the wedding that would be exclusively for the press providing they did not interfere with any of the proceedings that day. It was a small price to pay when you are one of the wealthiest families in the world and it insured their guests would be comfortable and not have to worry about paparazzi snapping photos.

The rehearsal dinner was over and Oliver was restless, his mind racing. Not tired enough to sleep he decided a walk might clear his head. He slipped a lite jacket on and headed outside.

It was almost 11 pm, still early for a Friday night in the city. He passed several bars contemplating whether or not to go in and have a few drinks, but never stopped. He crossed the street to where a small coffee shop was.

As he walked past the front window and headed for the door he saw her. Stopping dead in his tracks he watched her, her fingers tapping the screen of her tablet to scroll down the page she was reading. She didn't look away from the page she was reading as she sipped her coffee and put the mug back down on the table next to her.

Oliver took a deep breath and entered the shop. He watched to see if she would look up as he walked by. He was hoping she would, but she never flinched from what she was reading. He ordered his coffee and waited for the girl to call his name telling him it was ready.

"Oliver." The barista called placing his cup on the counter.

That was when he saw her look up and around to see the face match the name. She turned to see him take the coffee. Oliver lifted the cup to give a hello salute with it. He smiled. She smiled back and then motioned for him wordlessly asking he wanted to join her at her table. He accepted.

Oliver walked over and pulled out a chair. Felicity slid her tablet to the side. "Hi. How are you?" She asked putting her hands around the cup.

"Good. How are you?" He asked adjusting his chair.

"Good." Her red nails tapped the mug. "So what are you doing out? I meant that well, with the wedding being tomorrow I'm surprised Tommy let you leave the hotel. Laurel says he a nervous wreck."

Oliver chuckled. "Yeah well, he was too busy to see me sneak out. You should have seen him at the rehearsal dinner."

Felicity smiled. "That bad huh."

"Yeah. I don't know who is going to cry harder tomorrow. They need his and her tissue boxes." He laughed as he shook his head.

She shook her head. "Oh boy. This is going to be interesting to say the least." She slid her cup so the handle was on the other side. There was an awkward silence. Oliver looked at her hands encircling her cup. He wanted to take her hands in his and tell her how he felt. How beautiful that pink blouse looked on her and how he loved that damn pink lipstick.

Oliver sipped his coffee. "So, you saw we are supplying Palmer tech with the funding it needs for nano tech expansion? The proposal you made up for Palmer was fantastic, by the way. You won the board over without a second thought."

Felicity sat up proudly. "Yes. Ray told me you made the offer. It's a good thing. It's really going to help a lot of people." Felicity looked down at her mug. "Oliver, I…" She looked up at him. Their eyes locked.

Oliver got lost in her eyes. They looked at each other silently as if they were having a conversation without words. He waited for her to speak again, but no words came out of her mouth until she broke eye contact.

"I have to go." She quickly got up grabbing her tablet and purse, her opened wallet flipping out on to the floor.

Oliver leaned over to pick it up seeing the exposed photo where he license should be. It was a picture of them together. She was sitting on his lap, his arms around her, smiling as he kissed her cheek. Across from it was the slightly faded ultrasound photo that had the word baby typed out near the image. He ran his thumb over them gently. He looked at her with pain in his eyes as he handed it to her. Her lips quivered and she slowly took it from him squeezing her eyes tight as she folded it to put it back in her purse.

"Felicity." He whispered. "I…"

"Don't Oliver." She said turning to him. "I know it's been a year. I guess I should take it out of my wallet, but I just haven't been able to. " She held her purse to her chest protecting its contents. "I really have to go Oliver." She quickly headed towards the door stopping and turning to him. "I'll see you tomorrow Oliver." She turned and left the shop.

She still had it. He pulled his wallet out and opened it as he fell back into his seat. The edges were tattered, but the image was still there. Baby…..

Felicity sat on the exam table of the doctor's office, Oliver bounced his leg nervously as he sat in the chair both too anxious to speak. A knock at the door just before it opened broke the silence.

The doctor entered holding her tablet. "Hello Felicity." The doctor smiled walking over to the table next to her.

"Hi doctor Robins." Felicity smiled back.

"And you are?" Doctor Robins asked looking at Oliver.

He quickly stood up wiping the sweat off of his hands on his pant legs.

"Oh that's my father, not my father, my boyfriend, I mean the father of the baby and my boyfriend." She sighed trying to stop the spew of words coming out of her mouth. "This is my boyfriend Oliver."

Doctor Robins chuckled. "Nice to meet you Oliver." She shook his hand. "So now, tell me what's going on?"

"She's pregnant." Oliver blurted out.

The doctor turned to him and smiled. "I saw that in the file. Thank you Oliver." She turned to Felicity. "Can you lay back for me?" She helped Felicity lay on her back. "So you took the pregnancy test when?"

"Saturday." Felicity said as the doctor felt her abdomen. Oliver stood near her head holding her hand.

"When was your last period?" She asked pressing gently.

"May 6th." Felicity licked her lips nervously.

"So that makes you about seven weeks pregnant." The doctor smiled. "Your blood work looks good. I'm going to have the technician come in and we can do an ultrasound so you can see your baby."

Felicity squeezed Oliver's hand. "Are you ok?"

Oliver sighed nervously. "Yeah, I'm just a little nervous."

The ultrasound tech knocked and wheeled the equipment in. She smiled at them. "I'm Tracy and I'm going to take some pictures of your baby. Is your bladder full?"

Felicity nodded yes. "Yeah, a bathroom would be great right now."

The technician laughed. "Soon." She smiled powering up the machine. "Now pull your shirt up and undo the top button of your pants please. I'm going to take some measurements. I heated this up, but it might still be a bit cold." She put a towel in the front of Felicity's pants and squirted the jelly on her abdomen.

The technician pressed the wand to where she put the gel. They watched her nervously as she clicked away at the keyboard. "Ok. Looks good." She turned the screen towards them so they could see. "Ok, here's your baby."

Oliver lifted her hand as they watched the screen. He had no idea what he was looking at. It looked blurry and alien like. He could see Felicity examining the image. "Here." The tech pushed a button. "This is your baby." The screen labeled the image pointing out where the baby was displayed.

He looked down seeing the smile on her face widen. He leaned and kissed her gently on the cheek. "It's beautiful." He whispered and turned back to the screen.

Two copies were printed out and given to each of them.

Felicity pulled the back of her night shirt back so it was taught across her stomach. "It's huge." She said looking at herself in the mirror.

Oliver sat in bed, his back resting against the headboard. "You are far from huge and it hasn't even been a week since we saw the doctor."

She turned to face him as she walked towards the end of the bed and climbed on her hands and knees to her where her pillow was. "You don't understand. You're the guy and you aren't going to become a human people bus." She flopped on her back head resting on her pillow.

Oliver turned off the light and wrapped his arms around her. He kissed her temple. "You are the most beautiful human bus I have ever seen. I love you." He rested his hand across her abdomen. "Get some rest baby. The doctor says you need it."

Oliver woke the next morning alone in bed. He yawned as he sat up and stretched. "Felicity?" He called as he rolled out of bed. "Honey?" He yelled again still not getting a response. As he walked to the bathroom he saw the door half shut. He furrowed his brow as he pushed the door open.

There she was curled up on the floor arms wrapped around her stomach and tears rolling down her cheeks. He quickly kneeled down next to her. "Baby what's wrong? What happened?" He asked with a panic. Leaning over her.

"Somethings wrong Oliver. It hurts." She cried.

He quickly stood up scooping her into his arms. He carried her to the car and they rushed to the hospital.

On the way home he tried to concentrate on the road. Felicity laid with her forehead pressed against the window. The words rang over and over in his head. "It just wasn't the right time." The doctor had said. "Some things are just not meant to be."

He helped her out of the car and walked her to the bedroom. She lay in bed with a numb look on her face. He gently rubbed her back. "Is there anything I can do for you? Can I get you anything?"

She didn't answer. Her eyes focused on the wall in front of her.

Oliver took a deep breath and walked around the bed. He curled himself around her. "It's going to be ok you know. I can't imagine what you're feeling because I'm on the outside looking in, but no matter what I'm here for you, when you're ready….I'm here."

He breathed in her scent as he held her. He could feel her start to shake as she started to cry. "Shhhhhh…." He cooed. "It's ok."

She turned and curled into him. "I'm sorry." She sobbed. "I'm so sorry."

Oliver's eyes teared up. "You never have to apologize Felicity. You did nothing wrong. This, was not your fault." He squeezed her tighter as she cried harder. "It's ok." He whispered, comforting her gently.

Weeks went by, neither of them mentioning what had happened. They hadn't told anyone about the pregnancy or the miscarriage. It was like life just went on as usual. The only difference was the tenderness and affection had disappeared.

Felicity threw herself into her work, often times not returning home until after Oliver had left to go to Verdant. They were more than distant.

It seemed like an eternity since they had really spent any time together so on that night at dinner when Felicity started telling him about a job opportunity at Wayne Enterprises Oliver was less than enthused.

"It's a huge opportunity and really it would only be like four months tops." She said taking a fork full of vegetables.

Oliver pushed his food with his fork. "I can't leave for that long Felicity. I have Verdant to run and-"

She cut him off before he could finish. "Oliver, this is not some vacation. It's work. I don't expect you to drop everything to follow me to France. This is a major career opportunity for me and well, I think it's best if I go on my own." She held her fork rubbing it along her plate.

Oliver sighed as he looked at her. He didn't want to let her go. In his head this was the worst idea on the planet. If he said no would it put a deeper wedge between them? Would saying no and disagreeing with her make her resent him? Breaking up with her was the last thing he wanted to do. He knew the only way to keep her was to let her go.

He dropped his hand and clutched the box in his pocket. "It sounds like quite an opportunity for you." He looked down. "If you think this is a good thing then you should do it." He lied trying to be as supportive as possible.

Felicity looked up shocked at his agreement. "Really?" She blinked. "Wow, um well, I will let Mr. Wayne know first thing in the morning." She took another bite of food. "Thank you Oliver."

He stood there looking around the house. It looked so empty without her things. She had packed it all up and taken it with her. She left, just like that and he let her go without a fight. They called each daily, but that soon became every other day and then every few days, until it was now once a week or if they had the time.

Four months turned into six then months. He found out she was returning home when he was having dinner with Tommy and Laurel. Finding out she was communicating with friends more than him cut like a knife.

He met her at the airport. His heart pounding as he saw her. Why he didn't just grab her and tell her how much he missed her was a mystery to him. She pulled just one carry on behind her as she approached him. "Hi." She said giving him an awkward hug.

"Hi." He responded. "Are there anymore bags?" He asked looking towards the baggage area.

Felicity shook her head. "No. They are being shipped."

He took her bag and they walked to the car. Putting her bag in the trunk he got in the car. "Ready to go home?" Oliver said starting the car.

Felicity bit her lip. "Actually the company booked me a hotel room for a few a couple of days. I hope you don't mind. It's just I'm really tired and the jet lag. I just really need a little rest. You don't mind do you?"

Oliver started the car. "No. Not at all. I'll drop you off there and pick you up later for dinner. Everyone is excited to see you."

Felicity took a deep breath. "I really wanted to talk to you before that. You see Bruce Wayne offered me this executive position. I'd be working directly with Lucious Fox in applied science in Gotham. He's developing some amazing things and he requested to work with me leading his team. It's a huge career jump and well, I mean Laurel says I'm foolish not to take it and your mom and Thea said it's an opportunity like no other."

Oliver sighed. Finding out that she had discussed this with everyone else before him was the nail in the coffin for him. "I guess you have to take it then." He lied.

Felicity turned in the seat towards him. "Thank you Oliver. For being there. For being such a good friend. It means a lot."

When did they become nothing more than friends? He swallowed hard. His left hand dropping to the feel the box that held the engagement ring in his pants pocket.

He dropped her off at the hotel. Returning later that evening to pick her up for the welcome home dinner they had planned at the restaurant nearby.

They entered together. He watched her ponytail sway as she hugged everyone. Oliver stood back feeling like an outsider looking in, feeling alone amongst their friends.

Thea came over and sat next to him. She put her hand on his knee where his hand rested. "You ok Ollie cuz you're sitting over here on your own instead of joining the party."

Oliver gave a small smile as he watched Felicity as she laughed while talking to Moira. "I'm fine Thea." He sighed. "I just….It's been a long day." Why he didn't tell her that in his pocket he held the ring that he wanted to give her changing his future forever. "I'm fine Thea. Go back and have fun." Thea leaned in and gave him a hug then hopped up to rejoin the party.

By the end of the night the party had turned from a welcome home gathering to a farewell and good luck at your new job. Her goodbyes were said and promises were made to visit often. They headed towards the car Felicity looking down holding her sweater in front of her as she made her way to the car.

Oliver opened her door and then headed to the driver side. Her eyes fixed outside the car window as they drove. "I can't wait to get back to my room and get some sleep." She yawned.

"So when do you leave?" He asked trying to concentrate on the road ahead.

Felicity looked down. "Friday."

Oliver pulled into the hotel parking spot. He turned angrily to her. "Wow." He scoffed. "Tell me something Felicity, why did you even bother to come home? Was it to tell me what a "GOOD FRIEND" I am or was it to nicely tell me F-U I'm leaving."

"What the hell are you talking about Oliver? I think we can both agree our relationship has been different ever since." She turned away tears welling in her eyes.

"What's the matter? Can't say it?" He growled. "Here let me help you. Ever since you lost the baby and decided to alienate me and cut me out of your life like I was nothing to you."

"I'm leaving Oliver." She grabbed the handle and got out of the car quickly heading towards the hotel.

Oliver followed her. "That's right Felicity. Walk away." He shouted. "Thank you. Thank you for showing me just how unimportant I was to you. Good luck to the next guy you walk all over!"

She turned tears in her eyes and looked at him. "Goodbye Oliver." And with those words she was gone.

Oliver walked back to his hotel room. His words still rang in his ears. It felt like yesterday when she walked away. He could still remember the night two weeks after that when he went to Verdant and drank himself silly. That was the last time he called her literally professing his love to her, telling her that she belonged with him and that she needed to come home.

She never returned the call. He later found out from Tommy that Laurel had told him her phone had glitches and the message was never received. He never tried again.

Oliver returned to his hotel room. Tomorrow was the wedding and the only thing he could think of was how the hell he would make it through the day. Maybe it's time he started admitting to himself that he wasn't over her and he was a fool for not stopping her.

At this moment Oliver's biggest regret was Letting Felicity Smoak walk out of his life.

So now you know what happened and how. I hope you all feel better ;) Ok not really. Hope you enjoyed it. Drop me a line if you want to.