Hey guys!

I'm back from a really extended leave and with me comes season 2 of the Flash. I've decided I'm going to continue the story with prompts from season 2 because this season has been giving the SnowBarry shippers a lot to work with. Here's my take on episode 1.

Barry doesn't go to STAR Labs anymore, none of them do. The place holds to many memories that now just seem to be one big lie. The place is partially deserted now. It has lost all its warmth and familiarity. It is devoid of all the constructive bickering and friendly banter. There aren't any break through discoveries being achieved and no fun toys being discovered.

It's like when the particle accelerator exploded all over again but this time, there's nothing keeping them together.

Everyone has dispersed.

The dynamic has been broken. They aren't a team anymore. Barry works on his own now. He listens in on the police radios to hear any news of potential crimes or meta human sightings. He has his suit in a duffel bag he's stashed in his locker at the precinct. He doesn't have it in his heart to return to STAR Labs every time he has to get it. He does his best to continue being the Flash even though he doesn't have his support team behind him.

Joe and Iris have been understanding throughout everything. Barry still can't look Iris in the eyes. Eddie's blood is still stained on his hands. Not matter how many times Iris tells him that it was Eddie's choice Barry can't help but feel responsible, a horrible trait of the hero, so much self-blame.

Barry tried to ignore it by keeping his mind busy rebuilding the city. He needs to be in constant motion to keep his mind from stalling and going to dark places. Every time he enters the precinct he sees Eddie's picture and it makes his gut clench in the most unpleasant manner. It doesn't help that Iris is always coming into the precinct and Barry sees the way her eyes linger on Eddie's picture and a sadness washes over her countenance for a brief moment before she masks it beautifully.

There's so much dismay in his life now. There's so much self-doubt and self-pity clouding his life right now that Barry can't see through it.

But life always gives us that one silver lining to make things seem a miniscule better. Cisco has been a marvelous addition to the CCPD. He brings a new exuberance to the precinct that no one knew was missing, It reminds Barry of the better times at STAR Labs. The guy is walking cheerfulness and Barry feels the whole in his heart close a little more every time he sees Cisco sprint across the floor. It amuses him to finally see that Captain Singh find someone who annoys him more that Barry does.

It's a small mercy, this little piece of bliss here at the precinct, one that Barry is very grateful for but it still isn't the same. He doesn't have his whole anymore, he only has half.

After Barry closed the singularity and the city had been restored to a state of calm Caitlin had left. Barry really couldn't blame her. This world has dealt a doozy on her. Caitlin had been through more than one person deserved. She had lost Ronnie again mere hours after they had finally tied the knot. Barry remembers the brilliant smile that adorned Caitlin's face as she looked at Ronnie down their makeshift aisle. It hadn't been the most extravagant wedding by a long shot but it was so much more for the two them. But it seems that it was all in vain in the end.

Barry knew he hadn't been strong enough or fast enough to close the singularity by himself and it was his fault that Ronnie had died. The image of Caitlin's face the moment she saw that Ronnie wasn't with Barry and Dr. Stein would forever he ingrained in his memory. There was no resurrection for Ronnie this time and both he and Caitlin knew it. There was pure sadness on her face and there was nothing Barry could do to remove it. He had at the time enveloped Caitlin in a tight hug, if only not to see her tears. He may not have seen those tears but had felt them soaking through his suit and burn on his heart.

He had held her tightly as she sobbed but she soon broke away from him and rushed over to Cisco. The younger man also had tears streaking down his face. He clung to Caitlin as she broke down further. Barry tried to move towards them to offer some kind of solace but Joie had stopped him with a firm hand on his shoulder. Barry has looked over his shoulder at Joe in disbelief but his foster father just shook his head and with a slight tug pulled Barry away.

"Give them their time and space Barry." was all Joe had said. That was the last day Barry saw Caitlin. She took a job at Mercury labs soon after.

He hadn't asked Cisco about her since and Cisco didn't really make mention of Caitlin but Barry knew they still kept in touch. Barry hated to admit it but he missed Caitlin dearly. He missed the way she would lord over him and constantly nag him to take care of himself. He missed the exasperated eye rolls she used to shoot as him and Cisco when they were behaving childish. He missed the way she would give him a warm smile when he returned from a mission unscathed. But most of all he missed their friendship.

Barry loved Cisco like a younger brother but his bond with Caitlin had been something special. It went to a deeper level for the both of them. They understood a lot of the pain and suffering the other had been going through. Their friendship had been something that Barry had treasured more that he cared to admit and now that he didn't have it he felt a profound loss in his life.

So Barry threw himself into the only thing he could think of. He focused his life around being the Flash and trying to fix all the damage that had been done when the singularity opened up.

Central City saw his as a hero. They were even giving him the key to the city but Barry never felt more unworthy than he did at that time. He wasn't the one to save the city. It had been Ronnie and Dr. Stein that had closed the singularity and the City would never know of their bravery.

He had been convinced that he wasn't going to accept the honor. In his mind he didn't deserve it. He had told Iris as much when she had tried to convince him but something had stirred in him on the day of the ceremony.

He wasn't accepting the honor for himself. It would be for all of them, for everyone on team Flash. Those that weren't in the spot light and who the city would never know as their silent protector. He would collect this honor in memory of Eddie and Ronnie, who were the real heroes that day. The ones who had more to lose than he ever had. He would collect the key to the city but it would be for him, it would be for them and Caitlin and Cisco and Joe.

Barry hadn't expected for the day to go so wrong.

He had gotten his ass handed to him by a man who could grow ten times his size. It wasn't one of Barry's finest moment. He didn't have any guiding voice in his ear telling him what to do or the best way to their newest threat and it finally hit him how alone he was. And it was through his own bullheadedness that he was in this predicament. He had pushed everyone way.

The next time around Barry still hadn't learned from his mistakes. He ran off to face Atom Smasher without so much as a passing glance to anyone else in the room. Joe and Cisco had offered their help but Barry had down right refused. It was only due to Cisco and Dr. Stein's quick thinking that Barry managed to make out alive after face Atom Smasher a second time around.

When he returned to S.T.A.R. Labs Barry could barely stand on his own two feet. He was beaten and bruised all over. His current situation heightened his awareness of Caitlin's absence. She would usually be the first face he saw when he returned to S.T.A.R. Labs after a mission, hovering over him and making sure he was okay. She wasn't here today. There was no one the hover over him and stitch up his cuts and threat his bruises while simultaneously scolding his for his apparent disregard for his own safety. That in itself caused an aching in his heart.

It's Joe that comes and finally talks some sense into Barry.

"Bear you can't keep doing this by yourself." Joe's reasons but Barry will not hear a word of it.

"I can't keeping putting people's lives in danger Joe."

And Barry sounds so broken that Joe thinks to just let him be but he knows what he has to say is in Barry's best interest. Barry sometimes get so lost in his self righteousness that he losses track of what's really af stake. Joe know this all to well from having raised the boy himself. He knows when Barry needs a knock in the head. Caitlin was usually the one to do it when Joe wasn't around but she's not in the picture anymore and maybe that was the root of all the problems they were having. Their family was incomplete.

"You may mot realize this but everyone here chose to be here of their own free will Bear. You're not forcing anyone to be here," Joe explains calmly, "Everyone here knows or knew the risks of getting involved in this life Barry. No ones blaming you for anything that's happened."

Barry can't look Joe in the eyes because he knows the older man is right. Every single person, Ronnie, Eddies, Caitlin, Cisco, everyone knew the risked involved with being associated with the Flash. Both Cisco and Caitlin had been kidnapped because of their association with yet they still came back. Even so everytime Barry thought of the danger they could be in or the heart break and disappointment they could sure because of him, it tore a new hole in his heart. If pushing them away was the only way to safeguard their existence then that was what Barry would do.

"Joe I know they all chose to do what they did but I'm not going to be the reason their lives continue to be one big heart ache." Barry pleaded.

"And you think you pushing them away is going to be any better?" Joe questioned with a raised eye brow.

Barry still does look Joe in the eye. He turns away and mumbles out a feint yes. Joe's dealt with grumpy children before and this situation is no different. Barry refuses to budge.

"Barry, you getting I injured or even dying is hurt everyone more than anything else. How do you think Cisco and Caitlin will feel if you die and they knew they could have done something to prevent it." Joe explained.

Barry had be never looked at it like that. From the Joe's point of view everything seemed so different. Barry couldn't imagine leaving Cisco and Caitlin in a situation like that, especially knowing he would be leaving them heartbroken once again. It physically hurt to think about it.

"Can you really put them, all of us through something like that?"

Barry felt so stupid then. He had been trying to be selfless but had ended up being selfish in the process. He had never thought about how his wellbeing would affect the rest of his group.

"Everyone of knew what we were doing that day Barry,' Joe continued, "Eddie, Ronnie, they both knew what they were doing. So stop carrying all the blame on your shoulders."

Barry finally turned to Joe, his face crest fallen. He looked defeated.

"What do I do know?" he asked.

For the first time during the entire conversation Joe smile. "You fix what's really broken."

Barry stood at the entrance to the small lab in silence. Gaining entrance to Mercury Labs had been easier than anticipated and he didn't even have to use his powers. Tina McGee remembered him well and had given Barry the okay to go to Caitlin's lab.

He had entered the lab as silent as a church mouse. Something in him didn't want to disturb Caitlin as she worked. Barry had never gotten the opportunity to see Caitlin in her true element. For the majority if their friendship she had been his person physician, when in reality Caitlin's special was biological and genetic engineering. As he stood to the side, Barry took a moment to admire Caitlin work. For once she looked completely at ease. Her posture was relaxed and her spine wasn't in its ram rod position.

A feeling of guilt washed over Barry in that moment. He was being to have self- doubts about coming to see Caitlin. What if she had moved on? What if she was finally happy with her situation in life? Was Barry just stirring up old demons by coming here?

Barry didn't get much time to analyse all the questions plaguing his mind because as if sensing his presence Caitlin had turned around to see him standing by her doorway. He gave her warm smile when he saw her expression soften and her eyes light up with a warm familiar glow.

"What are you doing here?" she asked quietly as if not believing that Barry was actually there. He pushed himself off the door frame and took a step into the lab. He felt a fluttering in his stomach at the prospect of having Caitlin back at S.T.A.R. Labs again and he knew his mind was made up. He wasn't leaving until Caitlin agreed to return to S.T.A.R. Labs with him or she had him forcibly removed from the premises.

"Sorry…. I should of called or something." Barry stammered. His confidence was slightly boosted when Caitlin gave him another one of her warm inviting smiles. Barry found himself moving further into the lab, hoping to bridge the gap between them.

"I…I ah wanted to see you."

The confused look that flashed across Caitlin's face after Barry spoke made his heart stutter. Did she not think he misses her, because Barry missed Caitlin more than he could fathom. Her absence had been a physical ache for him.

"It's been a while." she reasoned.

Barry took another step forward so that he was now standing directly in front of Caitlin. He could smell her lavender body wash even above all the chemical scents that mingled in the air. It was like a wave of familiarity washed over him in that moment.

"Yea…." Barry said shaking his head slightly to get her intoxicating scent out of his head, "Cisco said he saw you at the Flash Day celebration. I was surprised."

Barry saw the exact moment the hurt appeared on Caitlin's face. She tilted head the side and her mouth open to form a perfect oh. She looked like she wanted to say something in reply but the words couldn't come. Either way Barry had to say what he came here to say before he could let Caitlin speak

"You better than anyone know that I wasn't the hero that day Cait." Barry explained. The hurt looked slipped from Caitlin's face and was replaced by a look of confusion. She shook her head at his statement, "Of course you were…."

"No….." Barry intoned, cutting Caitlin off from saying whatever it was that she was going to say. He looked down at the hands in his pockets. He couldn't face and say the next set of words that had to be uttered. She was a widow because of him. "Cait, Ronnie died saving me and I should have saved him."

Barry finally raised his head to look at Caitlin once more. "I should have saved his Cait…..I'm…I'm so sorry."

Caitlin shook her head again and looked away from Barry for a moment. He could see the tears welling up at the edge of her eyes but he knew she wasn't going to let them fall. Caitlin had done enough crying. She wasn't going to breakdown in front of him. She was going to say strong for him and it broke Barry's heart. He wanted to close the distance between them and wrap her up in his arms. He wanted to tell her it's okay to cry. It was okay for her to hate for what happened. He deserved it; he deserved every piece of her ire because when she needed him most he had abandoned her. Barry couldn't face Caitlin after what had happened. Cisco was the one who had picked up the piece this time.

When Caitlin finally turned to face Barry once more there were no traces if the tears that were present moment ago. Instead there was a fiery determination in her eyes.

"Barry I know you did everything you could." she stated and Barry once again couldn't look her in the eyes as she told him it wasn't his fault when he knew it was. He kept his eyes firmly face his shoes but he listened intently to Caitlin's words. "I don't blame you for Ronnie's death. I blame myself."

Immediately he looked up to face her. Barry couldn't comprehend what Caitlin meant by that. How on earth could she be responsible for Ronnie's death? "Why?" it was the only word that he could muster.

It was now Caitlin's turn to break eye contact. She heaved a heavy sigh and face Barry as she began her explanation. "When Ronnie first became Firestorm, he wanted us to leave Central City. To go somewhere new and start a new life together."

When Barry heard this he felt his heart constrict. The thought of Caitlin leaving stung hard than he thought possible but he couldn't begrudge her. Ronnie was the man she loved, he was her soul mate. His request wasn't that outlandish to consider.

"But I said no."

Here's where Caitlin voice finally broke and Barry heard the sob echo in her voice. He resisted the urge to go to her. She needed to get this out just like he needed to hear it. "I couldn't leave S.T.A.R. Labs, Dr. Wells," and here she shook head as if she couldn't believe she had stayed behind for such an evil man. She raised her head and the tears were falling freely now, "For you." she whispered.

Barry felt guilt engulf him. She had stayed for him, he knew it. The tears continued to stream down Caitlin's face and her cheek had acquired a pink flush. Barry couldn't bear to see her crying anymore. He reached behind to his back pants pocket and extracted a blue handkerchief.

"You carry a handkerchief now? What are you eighty?"

And Barry knew that as Caitlin's attempt at breaking the somber mood and he appreciated her all the more for it. A lot has been aired between them in the brief encounter and Barry still didn't know where they stood. As he handed her the handkerchief something fell out of his pocket. He bent down to pick it up, it was the flash drive.

"What's that?"

Barry showed Caitlin the silver flash drive Dr. Wells, or rather Eobard Thawne had left his containing his living will.

"Ahhh….."Barry began, "In the case of his death Wells had some kind of a living will."

"And you haven't watched it yet." Caitlin summarized. She knew Barry well enough to know he hadn't. It was something she could do form the moment she had meet. He was an open book to her and Barry knew it as well. He looked a bit sheepish at her accusation.

"No….No I haven't. I've been too afraid." he admitted.

Caitlin's expression softened at Barry's admittance. She took a step closer and said softly, "What if we watched it together?"

Barry looked up at Caitlin and realised there was no one he rather watch this with. She understood him better than anyone, even more than Iris. He knew he could finally watch it if she were by his side.

"Yea…sure."

And Barry knew then that everything was good between them once again. He had finally repaired the one thing that was most broken in Central City.

Hey so I know this wasn't all that but read and please review.

Stresses.