A/N: Here's chapter 11, the last real chapter in this story. There will be one more short chapter after this one. I hope you guys enjoy this chapter of Our Childhood Our Home.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything you might recognize from either Star Wars or Doctor Who.
Chapter 11
-Jessica-
''Do you think this will work?'' Cyana came up to me, after we told the Jedi what had happened.
''I honestly don't know.'' I replied.
''Hmmm... I hope we can free both of them.'' Cyana said.
I sighed. ''I hope so too, Cyana. I hope so too.'' I waited for a second, but decided that I would say it anyway. ''But there is a possibility that people die in this effort. You realize that, don't you?''
''I will not lose any of you. Nobody will die.'' She said with a stern voice.
I grabbed her two hands in mine. ''Cyana, I know that you don't want people to die, but there's always a risk involved. Especially with these sorts of attacks. The Separatists are merciless. They won't hesitate to kill any of the Rebels if necessary and they won't mourn over civilian casualties.''
''Why are they so cruel?''
''I don't know. I wish I knew.'' I looked her in the eyes. ''You're not going to lose me, Cyana. I'm not leaving you.''
Her eyes began to liven up. ''You mean that you're going to stay here? Stay here with me on Onderon after all of this is done?'' She asked hopefully.
''Well...'' I hesitated. ''It's a difficult decision, but I can't leave you like that. You're my sister.''
''But... What about your family on Earth?'' I saw she was struggling to not be too excited. She knew that I was having trouble with this decision, but she also desperately wanted me to stay. She had lost me once, and she didn't want to lose me again, knowing that she could have prevented it.
''You are my family, Cyana. This is my home.'' I said and I hoped that I sounded unafraid. But, in truth, I was absolutely terrified.
I saw she couldn't hold back her excitement any longer. She hugged me. ''Oh. Thank you, Ri. I know this must have been hard.'' She smiled, and I tried to hold back my tears. ''I didn't know what I would have done, if you had decided to go away. I only just found you, I just couldn't bear the thought of you leaving...''
''I know, Cy. I know.'' I just said and I patted her back. I pinked away a tear and sniffed once.
''Ri? What's wrong?" She pulled back and looked at me with concerned eyes.
''Nothing, Cyana. There's nothing to worry about.'' I reassured her. Trying to sound strong.
She sighed. ''You don't have to shield your feelings from me, Ri. I know you're having a hard time with this.''
''I assure you nothing is wrong. I'm fine.'' I shrugged of her hands and turned around.
''You know you can tell me anything, right?'' She called after me. I looked over my shoulder and nodded. But I still walked away. Slowly, the tears began running down my cheeks.
The Doctor came walking towards me. I tried to hide my tears, but I knew that he had already seen them.
''Jessica, why are you crying?'' He asked.
''It's just… It's just so hard to make a decision on whether I want to stay here or not. I have promised Cyana that I will stay here because she's here, but I'm torn on the inside. I miss home.'' I tried to explain.
The Doctor stayed silent for a moment, clearly contemplating what I had just said. ''I understand that you miss home. And I understand that you want to stay with Cyana. I understand more than you can imagine. And I understand that you're torn. I wish I could help you, but I can't.'' He looked very sad.
''How can you understand, Doctor? You have a home, right? Gallifrey?'' I asked him.
He sighed. ''I don't want to talk about it.''
''You never want to talk about it. I have seen you looking, Doctor. Your eyes are sometimes so full of sadness and anger at the same time. What happened?''
''Gallifrey burned.'' That was the only thing he said.
I became confused. ''What do you mean?'' I asked him.
''Never mind. Forget about it.'' He said to me.
''No. I won't forget about it, Doctor. I want to know.'' I grabbed his hand and he looked me in my eyes.
''You don't understand, Jessica.'' He said harshly. ''I'm the man without a home.''
''But your planet, what happened to it?'' His eyes were burning with sadness.
''I was the only one who could stop it. The only one who could stop the war. I still hear their screaming. Every time I close my eyes I see them. My family. My people. It all burned. I'm the only one left. All alone.''
''I don't understand, Doctor. What war?''
He stared ahead of him, in the emptiness. ''The last great Time War. The Time Lords fought against an alien race called the Daleks. I was the only one who could stop the fighting, stop the pain and screaming. It all burned.'' I just looked at him. I couldn't bring myself to say anything.
There was melancholy in his eyes and he continued his story. ''If you could have seen it, Jessica. It was so beautiful. The orange skies. The capital city, shining in the sun. Children playing. And it all burned. Everyone I loved, all gone. I'm the only one still alive. They called me the Doctor. I was supposed to save them and I couldn't.''
I slowly started to understand. ''That's why you don't want me to train with the rebels. You don't want me to be involved in a war.''
''The Time War was greater than any war you can possible imagine. I fought in it. I killed people. I was the only one who could stop it all and I did. It burned.'' Tears started to roll down his cheeks. We sat down. Just sat there in silence. What was there to say? I couldn't begin to understand what he had been through. How it had felt. The man with no home. No place to go to and all he does is run. The man who survived everything and lost everything.
The next morning I was tired beyond words. Till late in the evening I had been awake. Thinking of my own decision. Thinking of the Doctor. I couldn't leave him alone, could I? What was I to do? I couldn't let him leave and travel alone in his blue box. Her had been alone his entire life. He would always be alone. But at least I could be a companion. I had separated myself from the rest of the group, I didn't want their well-meant help. I had avoided Ahsoka and even the Doctor didn't get to talk to me. I had seen Cyana looking at me, but she didn't make any further attempts to talk with me. She knew that just as she could be very stubborn, I could be very headstrong too. I had cried my heart out, but it still didn't give any relief from the feeling of sadness that kept coming back. I still didn't know how to deal with my own decision, but that wasn't the thing to worry about right now. I needed to focus on the mission. We needed to free Saw and King Dendup, that was our first priority. We arrived at the plaza where the execution would take place. Every Rebel was disguised as a commoner, so as to not attract any unwanted attention. I saw the droids leading King Dendup to the place of the execution. Saw was to the right of him, also heavily guarded. This could be difficult. They were just about to cut the King's head off, when Steela gave the signal. Steela jumped to the front and shot the two droids down, who were about to execute the King. Lux threw two smoke balls to distract the Separatists. Now all of the Rebels started shooting at the droids. Steela and Lux freed both the King and Saw.
''Come on. Let's go.'' Cyana motioned us to follow her and escape. Then something happened that I would never forget in my entire life.
''Aah!'' Cyana let out a small cry and slumped down before my very own eyes.
''No!'' I screamed. I looked at Cyana. She didn't make any noise. There was just this smoking hole in her back. She didn't try to stand up. ''Cyana? Cyana!'' I touched her, but she didn't react. I felt for a pulse and felt nothing. Cyana had been killed. I couldn't believe it. My sister was gone. I had only met her a few days ago, we just started to become close, and now she was gone. I was about to drop to my knees, when I felt a hand pulling me up, right before I could hit the ground. I looked up and I saw that it was Steela who had pulled me up. She gave me a sympathetic look, but she motioned to the droids. I knew I needed to keep my strength, but how could I? My sister just died! This couldn't be happening. Why? Why my sister? I became enraged and the feeling of coldness washed over me again. But before I could do anything, we were surrounded by the Separatists. There was nothing we could do. I was still sobbing, I was too shocked to care about us being captured.
''It's over Rebels.'' The false King, Sanjay Rash, said. He motioned for the droids to put King Dendup on the chopping block again. For the second time that day they were about to chop off his head. Didn't this man have any respect for people? How could he just ignore the dead person lying in front of him? I had told Cyana yesterday that the Separatists were cruel, and that they would kill any person who got in the way, and now I needed to tell myself the same thing. It was just so unbelievable.
''Stop!'' A man yelled. I recognized him as the ex-General of King Dendup, Tandin. The man who had betrayed King Dendup at first, and who had defected to the Separatists. He came running towards us with a couple of men. The men pointed there weapons at the droids. There was nothing left the Separatists could do to stop them.
''Traitor.'' The King Rash spat out.
''I was, not anymore.'' Tandin replied and I saw him looking at Saw. Saw gave him a small nod of approval. We began to walk away from the droids, while the Tandin kept King Rash captive. The people started cheering. We walked back into the crowd. But now only Tandin was left and all the droids were pointing their weapons at him. There was nothing that we could do but watch. Then Ahsoka came jumping through the air. She threw the droids back with the Force.
''Jedi.'' The King gasped. I inwardly smiled at this comment.
''General. I think it's time for us to go.'' Ahsoka said to Tandin.
''I couldn't agree with you more. '' Tandin nodded and they both disappeared into the crowd. The droids were about to follow us when the crowd stepped up and began attacking the droids with their bare hands. The Separatists couldn't do anything against it. If they ordered to go after us anyway, all of the people would stand up against them, and they would be overpowered. We made it out safely. All of us, except Cyana. I had never felt so empty and bitter in my life. The Doctor had tried to talk to me right after it happened, but I had ignored him and walked away.
''Jessica. You need some fresh air, come out of this room.'' Ahsoka stood in the doorway of one of the rooms in our hide-out. The room I had been in for more than a day now. I hadn't come out at all, only to do the necessary things.
''Ahsoka. Just go away.'' I said to her, without looking at her. She didn't need to see the tears that were welling up in my eyes. I hadn't cried since the actual moment of my sister's death. After that moment I had held the tears back. Maybe they would be able to give a little relief of the grieve. I couldn't bring myself to tears. I now desperately wanted to cry, my whole body was drained, but I just couldn't.
She walked a bit further into the room and stopped right in front of me. ''Jess, you need to come out of here. I know what you're going through, but you at least have to eat something.''
''Do you? Do you really know what I'm going through? Did you see your sister drop to the ground right in front of your eyes?'' I raised my voice a little.
''No. I can't say that. But I know what you're dealing with. And I know that you probably don't care about me at the moment, or anybody else for that matter, but we still care about you.'' She pleaded. She squatted in front of me and tried to look me in the eyes, but I turned away my gaze.
''You have absolutely no idea what it feels like! Don't say you know how I feel, because you don't.'' I exclaimed. I wiped some tears away.
''You're right. I don't know what it is to lose a sister. But I do know that we can help you. You need help. You can't starve yourself.'' She looked angry.
''I'm not starving myself. I just can't get myself to eat anything right now.''
She sighed in exasperation. ''You can't be serious. I know bloody well what you're doing Jessica. And you also know it.'' She was very angry now. I had never seen Ahsoka so angry.
''What am I doing?'' I asked her, also angry.
''You're blaming yourself for her death. Well, let me give you a newsflash Jessica: It's not your fault. Not it any way. It's the fault of those stupid Separatists. You can't blame yourself, you couldn't have done anything to stop it from happening.''
''Yes I could have. I could have jumped in front of her.'' I persisted.
''What! Then you would have gotten killed. How do you think Cyana would have felt about that? Seeing you dead, because you wanted to save her? How do you think the Doctor would have felt? Your family on Earth?'' Ahsoka asked. ''Besides, you didn't know that this would happen. You didn't know that that droid would shoot.''
''Yes I did! I knew what would happen. I just realized it too late!'' I shouted. Then I realized what I had said. I knew that she would get shot because I had seen the TV series, but the series didn't exist in this universe.
''How could you possibly have known that it would happen? Did you have a vision?'' Ahsoka asked, now becoming suspicious.
I sighed. I knew it was time to tell Ahsoka. She wouldn't stop asking about it. ''Okay. I'll tell you, but promise me you won't tell anybody else. Not even Anakin.'' I looked into her eyes.
''I promise.'' She said sincerely, and I knew that I could trust her.
''I knew that someone would get shot at that very moment. I didn't realize it was my sister, but I knew that it would happen.'' I hesitated, but proceeded anyway. It was time for her to know. ''I knew all of this, because, well... How do I explain this?'' I muttered.
''Please tell me. I will try really hard to understand.'' Ahsoka said.
''The truth is, your lives, or actually the whole Clone Wars is a TV series in my universe. Everyone can watch it.''
''I don't understand.'' Ahsoka interrupted me.
''We know all about you guys. Your stories are told in a TV series called Star Wars the Clone Wars. I know it's hard to comprehend or believe, but please try.''
''So you knew all along about all of this?'' Ahsoka asked unbelievingly.
''Well, yes and no. I knew about the missions on Onderon and Ryloth. I knew that King Dendup would be saved, but I didn't know that I belonged here. That I had a sister. That my sister was the one who would die. That I would get shot on Ryloth. I didn't know the missions would involve me in any way.'' I tried to explain to her.
''Now I know why you feel guilty.'' Ahsoka muttered. ''But that doesn't mean you're right in blaming yourself. You couldn't have prevented it.''
''But, Ahsoka, can't you understand-?'' I started.
She interrupted me. ''No. No buts. I don't want to hear them. It's not your fault, you hear me? Not your fault.'' She looked into my eyes and I realized that she was right. There was nothing I could have done.
''Oh, Ahsoka. Would do I do now?'' I asked her desperately, and finally tears welled up in my eyes. She saw my tears, and she sat down beside me and she put her arm around my shoulders.
''You know that I would like for you to stay here. But I can't force you. And I can fully understand if you want to leave, after all that has happened.''
''There's nothing left here for me now. You guys will be fine without me.'' I said to her, knowing that she wouldn't blame me for leaving. She would understand.
''I know, Jess. I know. I think you need to go back to your old life. Start over.'' A smile came on her face. '''Go back to Ryan.''
I grinned a little. ''Yes. He would be happy to see me.'' Then the smile faded away. ''I will miss you guys so much!'' I exclaimed and I hugged Ahsoka. She hugged me back and when she pulled back, I saw tears shimmering in her eyes.
''Don't cry, Ahsoka. It's already hard enough.'' I punched her slightly and I saw the sparks return in her eyes.
Then she became serious again. ''Do you know what will happen with Onderon?''
''Yes. But I can't tell you.'' I said to her. It pained me to not be able to just blurt everything out, but I knew that I wasn't allowed to say anything about the future.
Ahsoka sighed and she looked disappointed. ''I understand.''
''Ahsoka, honestly, I don't think I can stay here any longer. Every time I see one of the Rebels, I think of her.'' I hadn't said her name, I couldn't get the word out of my mouth. It was too painful.
''I understand, Jessica. If you go now, I'd understand.''
''Thanks, Ahsoka. I'm grateful for that.'' Then I was reminded of something. ''But what about Obi-Wan and Anakin and everyone else in the Temple? What are you going to tell them?'' I asked her.
''The truth.'' Was all she answered. She smiled and grabbed my hand to pull me up. ''Now, come on, you're going home.''
A/N: Thanks for reading this chapter, I hope you enjoyed it.
As for my reaction to one of the guest-reviews: I hope you like the conversation between the Doctor and Jessica. The Doctor and Yoda won't meet again in this story. Maybe I'll write a one-shot or something of a conversation between the two of them. It sounds like it woud be fun to write something like that. Let me know if you like that idea.