One of the things that Gabrielle had to adjust to in her role as the Conqueror's personal slave was the keeping of secrets. There seemed to be so many of them. Whispered conversations, private conferences in the queen's quarters, quick words passed in corridors - Gabrielle was witness to many of them. Most of the time, the queen would inform her about what wasn't to be repeated. Some things, though, Gabrielle just knew instinctively not to spread around.
Like this, for example. Gabrielle rested her back against the headboard and gazed down at the dark head that rested in her lap. Outside of this room, Xena very seldom showed signs of real affection toward her slave, and never gave any hints of weakness. Gabrielle looked in wonder at the relaxed features of the Conqueror. Xena would never let her guard down like this anywhere or with anyone else. As her body slave, Gabrielle had a unique insight into what little vulnerability the Conqueror had.
Xena had abruptly changed Gabrielle's schedule that morning. Instead of going down to the kitchens right after their morning bath, the slave would now begin to accompany the queen to her morning court sessions. Gabrielle wasn't quite sure why Xena had decided to do this, but she hadn't questioned it. She was excited to see what it was like. She really didn't know anything about it, other than the fact that nobles would be asking favors, and that Xena might preside over some legal matters. It would be interesting, Gabrielle thought. She resumed her examination of the regal head that was pillowed on her thighs.
Even now, of course, Gabrielle knew that Xena's reflexes and awareness were sharp. If she, Gabrielle, were to move her arm, she knew that a powerful hand would clamp around her wrist in an instant, and those pale blue eyes would be fixed on her with unnerving steadiness. The blond girl stayed still. It was rare that she was really able to study her owner like this in such close quarters. When Xena was awake, she was constantly moving and shifting. It was hard to really observe her. It was interesting to have this chance now...Gabrielle could actually notice things about her.
For instance, the lack of wrinkles around her eyes and mouth. Gabrielle frowned as she studied the smooth, tanned skin. She'd always assumed that Xena must at least be in her mid-forties, if not older, because of how long she'd ruled over Thrace. After all, the woman had been made queen before Gabrielle had turned six years old. But now, gazing at Xena's relaxed face, the slave girl wondered. Just how old was Xena?
Abruptly, the queen's eyes opened and gazed up into hers. Gabrielle's breath caught involuntarily. Xena lifted a hand to clasp one of the slave's and rub it absently. "You bored sitting here yet?"
"No, Mistress," Gabrielle said softly. "This is all right."
"Think so, do you?" The Conqueror looked vaguely amused. "You're thinking again. I can tell by the look. What are you puzzling about, little goat girl?"
The slave wondered if Xena would be offended, but she didn't consider lying. "I was wondering how old you are," she admitted. "I thought you were forty-five or fifty, but you look a lot younger than that."
A brow arched. "Oh, really?' Xena's tone was dry.
"Well, yes." Gabrielle gazed down at her innocently. "I was really little when you became queen, and I figured you must have been fighting a long time to get there. So I guess I just assumed you must be older."
Xena smiled slowly. "I'd been fighting a little over five years when I was crowned," she said succinctly. "I was seventeen years old."
The blond girl's eyes widened as she did the math. "You...wait, you're...you're not even thirty years old yet?" she blurted, astonished. "And...and you started fighting when you were thirteen?"
"Twelve." Xena closed her eyes placidly. "Actually, I first picked up my sword when I was more like nine. I didn't join with an army until I was twelve, though. Up until then, I was scraping out a living as a bandit."
"Did your family get killed when you were nine, then?" Gabrielle was still amazed.
"Yep. I was just a little bit of nothing, but I was scrappy as hell." The Conqueror smiled grimly. "Got hold of an axe handle and started bashing those thugs instead of just letting them spit me. Managed to kill one somehow. The other villagers saw that and fought back, too. We won." She leaned her head back and hummed in pleasure as the slave began to thread her fingers through her dark hair. "I ran away after that. Learned to steal and fight."
Gabrielle lightly massaged her owner's scalp. "What made you join an army?" she asked. "I mean, if you were doing all right on your own up until then."
The Conqueror shrugged. "I decided it was better with force of numbers," she said. "Besides, I'd already decided I wanted to be in charge, and for that I'd need an army. And for that, I'd need to join one." She turned her head slightly so that Gabrielle's fingers could reach different parts of her scalp. "Logic."
"How long did it take before you were leading that army, Mistress?" the slave wondered.
"Little less than two years. Needed the skills first. Once I had 'em, I challenged the leader to a fight. He cut me twice, I took off his head." Xena lifted up her right hand and flexed it casually, as if inspecting the results of the fight. "They were mine after that. Been mine ever since."
Gabrielle was silent for a while after that. She tried to picture Xena as a nine-year-old girl, a small and lanky little thing with unruly black hair who had probably already had a petulant scowl. Then she thought back to when she'd been nine herself, back on the farm in Potadeia, just her and Mama and Da, and the little tot Lila had been. What had life been like back then? Daily chores, taking care of baby goats in the spring, helping Mama with the cooking and cleaning, and playing with Lila. The worst fear she'd had was of her father's volatile temper. She thought of the raiders who had destroyed her village. What if that had happened when she was nine? Gabrielle was sure that she'd never have thought to grab a stick and defend herself. She'd probably have run, if she'd had enough presence of mind. Xena must have been a remarkable nine-year-old.
Slowly, Gabrielle moved her gaze to her owner's face, and found those piercing blue eyes gazing back at her. "May I ask a question, Your Majesty?"
"You can ask." Xena's lips curved with faint amusement.
"I've heard...talk," the slave girl faltered. "Rumors, I mean. About you, and how strong you are, and...and some of the things you've done." The Conqueror arched a brow, but said nothing. "Some people say you can do the things you do because...well, because you belong to Ares," Gabrielle said. "Is that true?"
Xena snorted in disgust. "He'd love that," she muttered. Then, seeing the shock and confusion on Gabrielle's face, the queen smirked. "Ares and I have an understanding," she explained. "I rape, burn, loot and pillage, and he stays out of my way for the most part." The slave opened her mouth to speak, found herself without words, and shut her mouth again. Xena chuckled softly. "We talk every now and then. He offers me the world if I worship him, I tell him to get lost because I can take the world for myself. That's it, more or less. I've done him a favor or two over the years, and he's done me a few. But no, kid. I don't belong to anyone, god or man, and I never will."
Awed, Gabrielle let her hands still. "You've talked with the god of war?" she whispered. "Face to face? For real?"
"Yep." The queen lightly swatted one of Gabrielle's knees. "Hey, who told you to stop with the massage?" The slave quickly resumed her work. There was a pause. Then Xena glanced up at the slave and narrowed her eyes. "You want stories, don't you?" she asked suspiciously.
The girl blushed, but nodded shyly. "Please," she said. "I've never met anyone who really talked to gods before. And...and I love stories, Your Majesty. Please will you tell me about it?"
A cunning look crept over Xena's face. "Tell you what," she said. "I'll trade. I'll tell you about one time Ares talked to me, but then you have to tell me a story, too."
Gabrielle blinked. "Tell you a story, Mistress?" she echoed. "But I was never out of Potadeia before I was captured. I don't think I've ever had anything exciting happen to me in my life."
"Then make one up." Xena smirked and closed her eyes. "Now - my turn first," she said. "First time I met Ares was a couple of months before I joined my army. I was a scruffy little twelve-year-old kid, and I was running like hell from a group of bandits I'd just robbed. There were about twenty of 'em. I'd sneaked in and grabbed some of their bread, and they'd caught me. I knifed one of 'em and ran, but I'd lost my dagger in the fight, so I was looking for a weapon." Gabrielle's eyes widened. "Found a little temple in the middle of the woods," Xena went on. "Headed inside. There was a guy there, sitting on the altar as if it was a bench in a tavern. He was in armor, and had black hair and a beard. I asked him if he'd lend me a knife or something, and he laughed and told me he'd give me more than that. Made some speech about how scrappy I was, or something, and how he was the god of war, and if I'd worship him, he'd make me great, and blah blah blah. I told him to kiss my ass."
The blond girl groaned in dismay. "What did he do to you?"
"Nothing." Xena crossed her legs at the ankles and grinned. "Oh, he was mad, and he made a bunch of threats, but I think we understood each other. He gave me a gift and told me it'd get me out of trouble, but it'd draw me to him, or some bullshit like that. I took it and used it to beat the crap out of the guys who were chasing me until they decided it'd be easier to just cut their losses and take off."
Gabrielle was intrigued. "What did Ares give you?"
"I'll show it to you sometime," Xena said airily. "Now it's your turn. Tell me a story, goatherd."
The slave girl blushed and bit her lips as she thought. "Okay," she said softly. She hesitated before ploughing ahead. "All right. Once there was a garden, and there was a rose and an amaranth growing in it, side by side. The amaranth said to the rose..."
"A talking flower?" Xena lifted a brow.
"Um...yes..." Gabrielle paused, flustered. "Anyway, the amaranth said to the rose, 'I'm so envious of your beauty and your sweet scent! No wonder you're so famous.' But the rose shook its head and said, 'Don't envy me. I bloom beautifully, but my beauty fades quickly, and then I die. But your blooms never fade, even when they're cut, because yours are everlasting.' And the moral of that story is that greatness carries its own penalties."
There was a pause as Xena evidently mulled this over. Gabrielle continued to rub the woman's scalp and comb her fingers through her dark hair as she waited. She rather liked the queen's hair, she decided. It was thick and strong, but still soft enough to feel good against her hands. "Why's that the moral?" Xena asked suddenly. "I'd think the moral would be more like permanent stuff's more useful than temporary, or that prettier isn't always better. What the hell does greatness have to do with it?"
Gabrielle blinked. "Uh...I...well, I guess I don't know. That was the m-moral the bard said it had when he told it...I mean, he s-said that's the moral Aesop himself gave it..."
"Then Aesop's a moron," Xena said flatly. "He either gave that moral to the wrong story, or he doesn't know what he's doing."
The slave's mouth fell open. "Aesop's one of the greatest philosophers in Greece!" she protested in astonished outrage. "He's one of the most brilliant storytellers we have. He's up there with...with Plato, and...well, and Aristotle!"
"Doesn't change anything. If that's the best brilliance we can come up with, we're lucky we haven't been invaded and stomped to the ground already." Xena sat up and leaned over so that their faces were very close together. Gabrielle's protest died on her lips as she suddenly lost herself in the depths of those expressive blue eyes. The queen smiled slowly and laid the tip of one long finger against the end of the slave's nose. "Think for yourself, Gabrielle," she said. "Don't just take everything people say at face value. It might save your life someday. It's sure as hell saved mine." They stayed like that for a long moment. Then Xena winked, tapped Gabrielle's nose once more, and moved away. "Time for court. Don't wanna be late and tie all the nobles' silk hose in knots," she said, moving to the wardrobe. She exchanged her regular cloak for one trimmed in black fur, and set a simple golden circlet on her head. "Come on, goatherd," she said lightly. "I'll show you the cutthroat world of high politics." Nervously, Gabrielle followed her mistress from the room.
They went right at the foot of the stairs, the same way they'd have gone to head for the harem, but took a left before they reached its doors. The decorations in this hall were bigger and fancier than any Gabrielle had seen until now. There were sculptures and tapestries, and she even saw a huge, beautifully painted amphora that was nearly as tall as she was. Her green eyes were round with wonder as Xena led her through a guarded door and up a long, narrow corridor that led to an intricately carved door. The queen stopped there and looked down at her. "You ready to sit by me and look pretty while I run the kingdom for a while?" she asked, her lips curving upward.
Gabrielle blushed and lowered her head at the compliment. The queen had dressed her in a burgundy silk toga and slippers earlier, and had clasped ruby bracelets around her wrists. Gabrielle still felt somehow underdressed next to the beautiful queen in her black cloak and highly polished armor. "I think so, Your Majesty," she murmured.
Xena smirked and squeezed the slave's shoulders briefly. "You'll be fine," she said. "Just walk in with me, sit at my feet during court, and walk out with me afterward. You don't have to say or do anything." She twitched Gabrielle's leather collar with her fingers. "Come on, goatherd. Let's go terrorize some nobles." Turning, Xena flung open the door and stalked through it, her cloak swooping magnificently behind her. Gabrielle followed with some trepidation.
The throne room was massive, nearly as big as the harem, and was built out of the same beautifully-veined white marble. Huge banners hung from the domed ceiling, and a wide crimson carpet led from the magnificent double doors all the way up to the white marble steps of the dais where the throne was. The door they'd come through opened directly onto the dais. Gabrielle looked out at the crowd of nobles and uniformed soldiers that filled the place, and felt incredibly tiny and out of place. She followed after her mistress. When Xena seated herself calmly and precisely on the throne, the slave girl quickly knelt down to her right. One of Xena's long hands captured her arm. Gabrielle shuffled forward as she was guided; Xena gently tugged the girl's blond head down against her thigh.
It felt nice. Gabrielle felt better with her head resting in Xena's lap. She'd often sit like this with her owner in the queen's private conference room, and the familiarity of it calmed her. She heard Xena clear her throat. "Well, bring it on," she said, sounding bored. "Which one of you fancy-pants boys has first crack at me today?" The slave's eyes widened. She looked around surreptitiously as a man in livery - it was Gaelan, Gabrielle realized - began to make some long-winded announcement. To Xena's right, a few feet behind the slave girl, Callisto stood in full armor with a blade sheathed at her side. She was the only one Gabrielle could see who was armed. A couple of older men in rich robes stood on the other side of Xena's throne. Gabrielle looked down at the court and searched faces, but she didn't recognize anybody. She supposed that made sense. Courtiers didn't frequent the kitchens or the harem, and those were the only places Gabrielle ever really went, aside from Xena's quarters.
The queen's fingers absently stroked Gabrielle's head as a richly-dressed man bowed before the throne. Gaelan cleared his throat and announced him as Lord Antaeus. Xena rested her chin on her hand, regarding him without much interest. "What can we do for you today, Antaeus?"
"Your Majesty." The lord stood. He was quite handsome, Gabrielle thought - a tall man with the trim waist and broad shoulders that came from a lifetime of physical exercise and good food. His beard was neatly trimmed. The slave thought he had a pleasant face. "You will be pleased to know that the harvest in my holdings was better than expected, and so I have been able to add a tithe to the supplies you requested," he said. "I also brought a gift for the Crown - twin stallions, which I took the liberty of having stabled with the rest of your fine horses."
"Hm." Xena's smile had an edge to it. "That's pretty nice of you, Anteus. I'm sure I'll be predisposed to give you whatever future favor you're angling at."
His brow wrinkled. "Your Majesty! You wound me deeply. I am your loyal subject, and merely wished to express my gratitude to the Crown for the excellent governance that -"
"Yeah, yeah." Xena waved it aside, but smiled. "The Crown thanks you for the gifts. Next!"
Gabrielle lifted her head to look up at the queen in puzzlement as the man retreated. "Mistress?" Xena's eyes found hers. "He...gave you presents. Isn't that good?" she whispered.
The queen's lips curved a bit. "I'll explain things to you later," she said quietly. "Just watch and listen. Be my extra set of eyes and ears, kid."
It was all very well for Xena to say that, Gabrielle thought later. Three nobles were currently standing before the throne. There was evidently some kind of an argument going on about some legal matter relating to Xena's impending assault on Athens. Gabrielle didn't really understand it at all, and she was getting bored. Her legs ached beneath her - she wished she could get up and stretch them. She started looking at random people in the audience, enjoying the feel of the queen's fingers stroking her head. Her mind wandered. Gabrielle began making up stories in her head about the people she saw, and tried to figure out who or what they were by the way they looked.
A boy caught her eye. He looked fairly young, about Gabrielle's age. She studied him, idly wondering what about him had attracted her attention. There was nothing very remarkable about his appearance. He was dressed in a simple toga, like most of the palace servants, and looked very much like many other young men who served here. He did seem rather agitated, though, Gabrielle thought. As she watched, he fumbled in his belt and withdrew what looked like a small, slim stick. Gabrielle lifted her head to try to see it better as he lifted the end of it to his mouth. I wonder what he's doing? she thought curiously.
"...Ow!" The cry burst unbidden from Gabrielle's lips as she was suddenly shoved to the ground! Shocked and confused, she saw Xena move, and there was a flash of steel. Then there were screams, and people started shouting and running around. Gabrielle saw Callisto leap from the dais with her sword drawn. Her frightened eyes moved down to the chaotic scene in the audience. She could see, through all the pushing and shoving, that there was someone lying on the ground, and that there was blood - a lot of blood. Gabrielle felt sick.
Then she was tugged to her feet. Gabrielle found herself being half-dragged into the corridor she'd come through before. A moment, and the door closed on the chaos; she was standing in the comparatively quiet hall with her owner. Xena's pale eyes were anxious as she moved her hands over the slave's limbs. "Are you all right, Gabrielle?" she asked sharply. "Are you hurt?"
"N...no. I m-mean, I'm fine." The bewildered girl stared up at her. "What happened?" she blurted. "It was all quiet, and all of the sudden you pushed me, and there was blood..."
"You don't know?" Xena's brow arched. "You should. You're the one who drew my attention to him."
"Huh? Him, who?" Gabrielle was deeply at sea.
"My would-be assassin, of course," the queen said dryly. She lifted her hand to show Gabrielle a wicked-looking dart. "You tensed up, so I looked where you were looking, and I saw him use his blowpipe. If this had hit me, Thrace would've had to find itself a new queen within a couple of hours, I think." Xena gingerly sniffed the point of the tiny weapon and made a face. "Poisoned."
Gabrielle remembered the stick that the boy had put to his mouth. "...Oh." She still felt stunned. "Wh...what happened to him?"
The queen's attention was on the closed door now, and there was a dagger in her hand. "I killed him, of course," Xena said absently. "Got him in the throat with a knife before he could fire again."
A couple of soldiers came jogging up the hall. Xena started giving orders, and there was a good deal of excited conversation, but Gabrielle just stood where she was. She felt sick to her stomach. The picture of that young man was lodged in her mind. He'd been just a boy - probably a servant, like her. One minute he'd been standing there, and the next he'd been lying on the floor in a pool of his own blood. The outburst of violence had been so sudden and deadly and unexpected...! She wondered who he was, and why he'd tried to hurt Xena, and whether he had suffered much before he'd died. Gabrielle's head whirled in confusion and horror.
"Hey." A warm, strong hand rested on the slave girl's shoulder. Gabrielle blinked and looked up to find Xena gazing at her in gentle concern. "You all right, goatherd?"
The blond girl inhaled deeply, and felt the lightheadedness recede. "I'm okay," she said softly. "It's just...I've never seen something like that before, Your Majesty."
"You're doing all right, kid," the queen said, with a touch of dark amusement. "First time I saw someone get his throat cut, I puked all over the place." The door to the throne room opened, and Callisto appeared. Her pale hair was sticking out in every direction - her drawn sword was smeared with blood. Xena met her gaze. "All clear?" Callisto nodded with a smile that made Gabrielle shudder. Footsteps approached them from the other direction, and the slave turned to see Hedia. Xena noticed the new arrival a moment later. "Ah, there you are," she said. Gabrielle felt the Conqueror clap her on the shoulder. "There's been a bit of a dust-up. Take my little goatherd here to get changed, and then to the kitchens; she'll be safe enough there until we figure everything out."
Gabrielle didn't like the idea of leaving Xena when someone had just tried to kill her. Don't be silly, she scolded herself. What could you do to help, anyway - peel carrots? She bowed her head and let Hedia take her by the hand to lead her away.
A firm hand on Gabrielle's arm stopped her for a moment, and Xena bent to murmur into her ear. "Don't tell anyone about this. We'll talk later." The hand squeezed briefly and released. A moment later, the Conqueror was deep in muttered conversation with Callisto and General Bennu, who had seemingly appeared out of nowhere.
The promise made Gabrielle feel a little better, although the warning confused her. What could she possibly tell anyone other than the barest bones of what had happened? She didn't even know what was going on herself. Nevertheless, the bewildered girl decided to obey. She let Hedia lead her from the scene toward the comparative safety of the queen's quarters.