Chapter 11: Heaven and Hell

The doors to the cabin opened with a blast, flooding the room with power that sparked like electricity in dry heat. The angels followed in its wake.

"Please tell me you're here to help," Dean said, his voice hoarse with exhaustion. He was pale, the edges of his mouth tight, the delicate skin at the corner of his eyes pinched and lined. "We've been having demon issues all day."

"I can see that." Uriel stared coldly at Ruby. "Your company just keeps getting worse and worse, doesn't it?" he asked, his gaze drifting to Eli.

Eli stared him down. She knew angels, better than anyone, and all the little details—Uriel's aggressive stance, the almost invisible slump of Castiel's shoulders, the grand entrance—were warning signs that something very, very bad was about to happen. "They're not here to help," she said in a low voice. She shifted her eyes to Castiel, trying to force him to look at her, but he refused.

"We're here for Anna," Castiel said, his face carefully blank.

"Are you gonna help her?" Sam asked. Eli shook her head.

"No, they're not," she repeated, dropping her stance lower, ready to spring.

"Elijah is right," Castiel intoned, still not looking at her, his voice solemn and hard. "Anna has to die."

"Why?" Sam asked. Eli shot him a look.

"Does it matter?" she countered, her hands inches away from her guns.

Uriel walked towards Dean with a slow menacing gate, his dark eyes brimming with barely-contained anticipation. Dean held up his hands, trying to reason with him, and Eli took the opportunity to edge to the door that guarded Anna, stationing herself in front of it, guns out. It felt wrong, facing an angel with a gun. She didn't know if her power would even work against the Host, but it was the only weapon she had.

Still, what if it did work? Unbidden, the thought of her white bullets piercing through Castiel's chest came to mind, blood blossoming across his white shirt, his mouth slack with pain and surprise as he staggered back into a wall and… she violently shoved the thought away, feeling sick. No. That would never happen.

"You're some heartless sons of bitches, you know that?" Dean snarled.

"As a matter of fact, we are. And?" Castiel's voice was calm, but his eyes had finally found Eli's, and there was something almost… pleading reflected in their blue depths. Like he was asking forgiveness. Eli turned away. Her hands were shaking.

"Anna's an innocent girl," Sam said, in that sad-puppy voice of his. Castiel shook his head, his trench coat lifting in a nonexistent breeze.

"She is far from innocent," he rasped.

Sam glared at him. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means she's worse than this monster you've been screwing, even worse than the half-human freak, who, by the way, is supposed to be helping us, and whose disobedience and obstinence will be noted. Now give us the girl." Uriel took another step forward, his solid bulk like a threatening wall. Dean stood his ground.

"Sorry. Get yourself another one." He put on the fake-light tone he only used when he was really scared. "Try JDate."

Uriel smirked, the look of a man who knows he has the absolute upper hand. Eli felt sudden pity for his vessel, who must have agreed to be inhabited because he thought it would be by something holy, and instead he got this douchebag using up his body like an old condom. "Who's gonna stop us?" he asked scornfully. "You two? The Abomination? Or this demon bitch?" As a show of strength he threw Ruby against the wall by barely twitching a finger. Dean lunged at him, only to be swatted away like a fly.

Sam began begging fruitlessly— "Cas, stop...please"—only to crumple to the ground like a broken doll at the lightest touch of Castiel's fingers to his forehead.

Castiel turned to face Eli; she had dropped her guns and stood as a human blockade, her fists and jaw clenched. "Eli, move," he said, almost pleadingly. "I don't want to have to do this."

She shook her head. "No."

On the other side of the room, Uriel was pummeling Dean into the ground.

Castiel sighed, lifting two fingers to her forehead. "I am sorry," he said. She flinched back, squeezing her eyes shut, but he was too fast. He touched her skin.

Nothing happened.

Eli cracked her eyes open. Castiel was standing there, fingers still pressed to her forehead, clearly confused. She took the opportunity to knock his hand out of the way and then, flaring her fist with white fire, punched him in the face.

Normal human attacks did nothing to angels, but this one actually landed, her light cutting through his barrier. He stumbled backward, holding his cheek, surprised. Then his eyes hardened and he straightened, shook out his trench coat, and strode toward her purposefully.

It was at that moment that everything went white. The angels disappeared in a screaming flash. Something inside of Eli was blown away, and she collapsed into unconsciousness.

The next thing Eli knew she was on Bobby's couch and someone was hovering over her. She felt the brush of long hair against her skin and smelled a familiar, angelic sunshine-and-summer-breeze scent, though this one was unmistakably feminine.

"Nghhh," she muttered, cracking her eyes open to see Anna smiling down at her. "Whha…" She couldn't get her jaw muscles to work. She swallowed and tried again. "Wha…happened?"

"Hi, Eli," Anna said, sitting back, her fingers warm against Eli's cheek. "Good to see you back in the land of the living. How do you feel?"

Eli struggled to sit up but it was like every muscle in her body had turned to jelly. Bobby appeared behind her, lifting her gently and propping her back against pillows. Sam pressed a glass into her hand. "Like I just got hit by a truck," she groaned, pausing to drink deeply through a straw. "What the hell happened?"

"That was my fault, I'm afraid," Anna said, looking sheepish. "I didn't understand who I was, what I was doing. I wrote the blood-spell to send away the angels, and you're half-angel. So your body stayed here, but it sort of…sent away your mind."

Eli stared at her. She knew that Anna was different, but she couldn't put her finger on how. "You're…it's strange, you feel like an angel, but I can't sense…"

"I have no grace," Anna finished. "When I ripped mine out I was reborn mostly human. Very few powers." Her lips curled upward, but it only made her look rueful. "You were sent so very far away; it was extremely difficult for me to bring you back."

"Well…thanks, I guess," Eli said lamely, sipping at her drink.

"Don't mention it."

"All right, are we done with the explanations and crap?" Dean asked, emerging from the kitchen, mouth half-full of sandwich. He swallowed and looked over at Eli. "You okay, kid?"

"Just peachy," she said, with the hint of a smile. He nodded brusquely, but Eli could see by the tense set of his mouth and brow how worried he had been, and it touched her.

"Good. Would've sucked to have a comatose bodyguard on our hands, especially now."

"Where are we going?" Eli asked, pulling herself straighter. Bobby put a hand on her shoulder.

"You're not going anywhere," he said sternly. She batted him away and got to her feet, trying not to wobble.

"I'm fine. It'll just take me a couple hours to recharge. If we're gonna have some kind of final big battle, you'll need me. I was the only one of you losers able to get a punch in. Now, where are we going?"

The two brothers looked at each other, then Sam shrugged and turned back to Eli. "To find Anna's grace."

Eli crammed herself into the backseat next to Anna, her cheek pressed against the window, her eyes immediately dropping closed. The last thing she heard was Dean's laughter and Ruby's annoyed voice asking: "What?"

"Nothing," he said, grinning. "It's just… two angels and a demon riding in the backseat. It's like the setup to a bad joke... or a penthouse forum letter."

"Dude," Sam said, his tone patronizing. "There's reality... and then there's porn."

Dean snorted. "You call this reality?"

Darkness took her, and for the first time in a long time, Eli slept peacefully.

The next time she awoke, it was night and Sam was shaking her.

"Eli, hey, you in there?" he asked, sounding a little worried. Blearily she opened her eyes to stare at him.

"Whaddawant?" she grumbled, only then noticing that the other seats were empty and that Sam was crouching outside of the open passenger-side door. She sat up. "Where is everyone? Where are we? How long have I been asleep?"

"All day," Sam said, helping her out of the car. Eli shivered and pulled on her leather jacket; the moon was high, bathing the barn in front of them with an eerie glow. "We tried to wake you earlier, when we checked out the oak tree where Anna's grace landed, but you were out. Nothing could rouse you." A smile quirked his mouth. "You drooled all over Anna's shoulder. Muttered some interesting things in your sleep, too."

Eli's face went beet red as she suddenly remembered some of the dreams she had had. "Oh, ah…so… did you find the grace?" she asked, changing the subject. Sam's face fell.

"No," he said moodily, shoving his hands into his pockets as they walked toward the barn. "It wasn't there. Someone took it."

Inside, they could hear arguing. Ruby's voice was especially heated. "Anna's grace is gone," she was near-yelling, her voice getting louder as they approached. "You understand? She can't angel up. She can't protect us. We can't fight heaven and hell. One side maybe, but not both. Not at once." She stopped abruptly as Sam and Eli came into view. "Oh thank god, the bodyguard is here," she said sarcastically. "Enjoy your nap?"

"Bite me, bitch," Eli snapped.

"Um...guys?" Anna said tentatively. They turned to look at her, sitting on an old wooden table and swinging her feet, her long red hair falling back from her face as she stared at the ceiling. "The angels are talking again."

Sam moved closer to her. "What are they saying?"

"It's weird..." she said slowly, tilting her head. Eli closed her eyes and concentrated, feeling a headache coming on. "Like a recording... a loop. It says: 'Dean Winchester gives us Anna by midnight, or...'"

"Or what?" Dean asked.

"Or we hurl him back to damnation," Eli finished, opening her eyes. "I can hear it too. Looks like they're sending the message out on general public radio."

After that, the emotion in the room delved into utter helplessness.

Eli couldn't sleep that night, probably because she had slept all day. She was sitting outside and staring at the moon when Anna plunked down next to her, her clothing freshly mussed.

"Hey," she said. Eli said nothing, just continued to stare at the dark sky, freckled with stars and the dim shadows of clouds.

"That's okay," Anna said, sounding wiser than her years. "We can just sit here quietly."

They sat like that for about five minutes.

"Was it really so bad?" Eli asked, wrapping her arms around her dirty pants and shivering in her jacket. The nighttime breeze smelled like hay and the faint scent of horses and grass and rotting wood. "Being an angel, I mean."

"Ah," Anna said. "Is that what they are offering you? I'm not surprised." She paused. "It's not a good life. You have it tough, don't you? Between a rock and a hard place. I can understand why you want acceptance, especially since angels are – technically—your family."

Eli said nothing.

"I can't tell you what to do," Anna continued. "But you would be giving up so much, so many beautiful things about this life."

"I already have," Eli bit out, almost regretfully. "I gave up everything I had for this, to be a hunter, a warrior. And they hate me, they all hate me. But they wouldn't if I was… perhaps… maybe I'm meant be an angel. Maybe that's where I belong."

"Maybe," Anna said, but she didn't sound convinced. "You should also be aware that angels don't always tell the whole truth."

"What do you mean?" Eli looked at her. In the moonlight the fallen angel's face was silver, glowing and strangely beautiful.

"I mean that if they are offering you something like this – something they would never offer anyone – there has to be a catch, and a big one, too."

"Do you have any idea what that catch is?" Eli asked, pulling the sleeves of her jacket over her numb fingers.

"I couldn't say," she said. "All I know is that if they want you to be an angel, it's because they have a problem with you the way you are. For angels to offer someone a grace means that they are really, really scared."

"Scared?"

Anna stared at her calmly. "Of what you could become."

"I don't understand," Eli complained.

Anna leaned her head against the wall and stared at the moon. "No," she murmured. "You wouldn't."

Suddenly Eli noticed that Anna's blouse was inside out and her red hair was unusually mussed. "Anna, you didn't…" She looked the fallen angel in the face. Anna flushed and looked away. "You did, didn't you?" she asked slowly. "Wow. Not that I blame you. Last night on earth and all. How was it?"

"What can I say?" Anna said, smiling her secret smile. "I really, really, really like being human."

"Lucky Dean," Eli muttered bitterly before she could stop herself. "We're all gonna die, at least he got to sleep with his angel." She stopped abruptly, her fingers flying to her mouth. "Shit, oh, fuck, I mean…"

"Oh honey," Anna said, looking at her with nothing but compassion. "It's okay. I already knew. I'm pretty good at reading people." She grinned cheekily. "Plus you mumbled some interesting things in the car."

Then her smile faded. "But it's a bad idea, Eli. He's wrapped up in a pretty package, but he's a cold fish. All angels are. Wouldn't know passion if it bit them on the ass."

"I know," Eli grumbled, embarrassed. "Do…ah… the guys know?"

"They thought you talking in your sleep was pretty funny, but no, they have no idea what any of it meant. I'm a little more...intuitive. Comes from observing humans for over two thousand years. Plus, Sam and Dean are idiots."

Eli cracked a smile, then groaned and buried her head in her knees. "God, I'm so embarrassed. Especially now that he's trying to kill you!"

"Believe me, you having a crush on our resident angel is the least of our worries. It'll pass with time." Anna rubbed her back soothingly. "And hey, if we all die tomorrow, you won't have to worry about it anymore."

"Thanks, Anna," Eli muttered sarcastically into her pants. Anna smiled.

"No problem, sweetie. Just here to help."

Morning came too quickly.

Ruby was gone, suspiciously. Dean was drinking whisky straight from the bottle and snarking at everyone. Anna looked exhausted, the skin around her eyes blue and shadowed. Sam's hair was sticking up in all directions from running his hands through it all night. Eli just felt like shit.

Then, the angels showed up with a bang.

The barn doors flew open in a whirl of strangely hot wind. Castiel and Uriel walked through them calmly, Castiel's trench coat swirling around him like it had a life of its own. Once they were inside the doors slammed with a ringing crack, leaving all of them trapped.

"Hello, Anna," Castiel said, his gravel voice almost too emotionless, like he had been practicing it in front of a mirror. "It is good to see you."

"How?" Sam burst out, looking wildly around the room. "How did you find us?" His gaze landed on his brother, who was looking down, clearly fascinated by something on his shoe. "Dean?"

Dean looked up but refused to meet anyone's eyes. "I'm sorry," he said brokenly.

Sam took a step toward his brother as if he couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Why?"

"Because they gave him a choice." Anna's voice was amazingly calm and centered. "They either kill me... or kill you. I know how their minds work."

She walked over to Dean and kissed him lingeringly on the mouth. "You did the best you could," she said, looking him in the eyes. Her tone was infinitely compassionate. "I forgive you."

Then she stepped away and turned to the angels. "Okay," she said with finality. "No more tricks. No more running. I'm ready."

"I'm sorry," Castiel said, and for a moment something flickered in his tone.

"No, you're not." Anna said with quiet conviction. "Not really. You don't know the feeling." She caught Eli's gaze for a moment, as if to say, see? Eli nodded.

Castiel shifted awkwardly on his feet, noticing the silent communication between the two women. "Still, we have a history. It's just –"

"Orders are orders." Anna pulled herself straight, as if she was about to mock-salute. She didn't, though, just stood there looking resigned. "I know. Just make it quick."

Eli felt like she was about five seconds from screaming. She hated feeling this helpless, hated it, but most of all she hated that it was Castiel. He couldn't want this—no matter his flaws he wasn't like Uriel, reveling in pain and death. She had known him for six years, damnit, he had to do something, he had to feel something. He had fought for her, hadn't he? He had trained her to keep her alive. He couldn't just slaughter one of his own. He couldn't!

Castiel took a deep breath. Uriel looked as gleeful as his carved-in-stone face would allow. Anna faced them both with cool bravery.

Eli contemplated flinging herself in front of the fallen angel. She contemplated putting a bullet in Uriel's head. She contemplated throwing herself on the ground and pitching a fit until everyone came to their senses. She contemplated—

"Don't you touch a hair on that poor girl's head!"

Eli's increasingly insane thoughts were interrupted by a familiar nasal whine. A thin, wiry man with hollow features appeared, flanked by demonic cronies and a battered-looking Ruby.

Uriel was furious, his power straining at its ropes, dangerously close to escaping his vessel. "How dare you come into this room, you pussing sore!" he boomed with blistering righteousness.

Alastair merely smiled. "Name-calling," he said in his bleating voice. "That hurt my feelings... you sanctimonious, fanatical prick."

"Turn around and walk away now," Castiel rasped authoritatively. Eli could see the change in him immediately—where a moment before he had been empty and cold, now he was blazing, burning, absolutely sizzling with power and grace.

Eli hated that it made her knees a little weak.

Alastair shrugged lazily. "Sure. Just give us the girl. We'll make sure she gets punished good and proper. Actually," he said, his eyes moving to Eli. "We'll take the Halfling, too. Got some things we'd really like to tell her about her… situation." He grinned.

Eli didn't even have time to contemplate what he had just said, because Castiel immediately moved in front of her and growled in a voice more menacing than she thought possible: "You know who we are and what we will do. I won't say it again. Leave now... or we lay you to waste."

Alastair smirked. "I think I'll take my chances."

The battle erupted. Uriel attacked a demon, laying his huge hand on the demon's forehead and watching in satisfaction as it screamed in pain. Castiel lunged at Alastair, and after a moment of grappling, managed to pin him down, hand on his face. Nothing happened. Alastair smiled hugely.

"Sorry, kiddo," he breathed. "Why don't you go run to Daddy?"

He flipped the stunned angel against a pillar and began his own exorcism ritual, muttering blackened words under his breath. Castiel tipped his head back in pain, light beginning to creep out of the corners of his eyes and mouth.

Suddenly Alastair flew to the side and crashed into the wall, something white-hot lodged in his ribs. He looked up, growling, at Eli, who stood there with guns blazing and an absolutely murderous expression on her face. No one touched her angel.

"Guess I can do some damage after all, you evil son of a bitch," she hissed, raising the gun to his head. She was interrupted by Anna's throaty screams and the appearance of a blinding white light.

"Shut your eyes!" Anna howled, her whole body glowing. "Shut your eyes! Shut your eyes!"

Eli turned. Time slowed down.

Anna was being consumed by a white light, one that streamed from her pores like a sun under her skin, brilliant and clean and smelling sharp like ozone. Eli was transfixed by the glow. It shined, more warm than fiery; it called to something deep inside of her. Instead of shielding her eyes she moved towards it, hypnotized, her hand reaching out in wonder.

Castiel knocked her to the ground, covering her body with his and her eyes with his hand, as Anna exploded and the light reached unbearable levels.

When it was over they stayed very still for one long moment. Eli could feel Castiel's heart thrumming in his chest, too fast, like a hummingbird's. His body radiated heat, his hand still shielding her eyes, his head dipped to her neck as he breathed in deeply. Then both seemed to realize what was happening and they leapt quickly off of each other, Castiel tugging at his trench coat as if embarrassed.

Eli looked around. The first thing she noticed was that Alastair was gone. The second thing she noticed was that everyone was too busy yelling at each other to see what had just happened between her and the angel.

"This isn't over," Uriel was promising Dean in a deadly voice.

Dean smirked. "Oh, it looks over to me, junkless."

Uriel glared at him, then disappeared. Castiel stayed for a fraction of a second longer, his pained eyes meeting Eli's, before he too vanished with the sound of beating wings.

Eli stayed stock still, staring at the spot where he had been, until she heard Sam say: "So, I guess she's some big-time angel now, huh? She must be happy... wherever she is."

"I doubt it," Dean said, a tired sadness in his voice. Eli hung her head.

Somehow, she doubted it too.