For a while when I woke up I forgot where I was. As I moved I realised I was surrounded by cushions and that someone was led next to me. I rolled over and suddenly I was falling. I landed on the hard surface with a loud thud, followed by a moan on my behalf. I heard a snigger and then some movement above me.

"Did you have a nice fall?" Peeta asked above me. I glanced up and saw his blue eyes peeking at me from the cushions of the red sofa. I glared at him, but didn't move. "I'm surprised you stayed on as long as you did." He said and reached out to comfort me. I took the opportunity and grabbed his hand, pulling him down with me. He also landed with a thud and a low (sort of a growl) noise came from the back of his throat.

"Was there any need for that?" He exclaimed and began to get up. I moved so I was on top of him, not ready to give up this fight. Some of my hair was loose out my braid; it was falling over his face, tickling his skin. He smiled at the game and tried to move me, but I was like a brick wall. When he finally gave up I leaned over him and planted a small kiss on his lips. But as I moved away he gripped my neck and pulled me back down for more. He moved his hand and began undoing my braid, letting each new strand that freed itself fall down to him. He ran his hands through to the end then began traveling down my back, pushing me farther into him. I didn't know if there would be any space left by the time he was done. He began to kiss me faster, more urgently, as though I was the elixir to his curse. He rolled me over so that he was on top, his top bagging over me. I gripped the material, unsure if I was supposed to take it off. I was so confused. This was moving too fast. He took hold of my face and began kissing me harder. I felt smothered in my own skin. I pushed on him and made him moved back.

"Wait, just wait." I stammered, standing up. I tried to remove the urge to lower myself back down and join him on the floor. He calmed himself down slowly, breathing in and out calmly and it began to slow. He sat up, bringing his good knee up to join him. He glanced up at me, like I needed to give a reason. "It's just moving too fast." I said. I mean, we hadn't even had breakfast yet. "I think we should slow it down." I pulled up my trousers as they had strangely slipped down lower than usual and then i trotted into the kitchen. I heard him get to his feet, which was a long process with his artificial leg. I glanced back and saw him following me.

"Is everything ok with us?" He asked solemnly.

I stopped and turned. Staring into his eyes I realised that he was serious, he actually thought something was wrong with us. "No, we're fine, that is unless you have a problem with us?"

"Why are you scared to go farther? Don't you love me enough?"

I stared at him, scared and tired. We were exactly alike Peeta and I. We have seen the same tortures and returned. We always came found each other. Our eyes had seen hell and back and still manage to find happiness in each other's presence.

Did I love him?

Would my heart ache if I ever saw him upset or hurt? Yes.

Do I accept him for all his flaws, just because it makes him the man his now, the man standing in front of me, looking at me with his beautiful eyes like I was his treasure? Yes.

Would I give up my life for him? Of course I would.

"I love you more than the world." I answered truthfully. "Do you love me?" I asked shyly.

He stepped to me, taking my face in his hands, making our foreheads touch.

"What value would there be to life if we're not together?" I held my breath, trying to capture this moment in my memory to bring out on a rainy day. How his voice was soft and husky all in one, the way his hands were warm against my skin. How the sun tickled my flesh, or the way the room sparkled with the floating dust. I smiled content with his answer and kissed him.

I loved him, but this was all too fast. I explained to him how I felt and he understood. "I would wait forever for you." He stated.

"I'm not asking for forever," I paused and took hold of his hand.

I left not long after and headed for the woods. Cyra was there, ready for hunting. We circled the entire area which would usually take 5 hours in less than 3. So I decided to take her to the Lake. She grinned and jumped in. I began to panic, but then remembered.

District 4,

Of course she knew how to swim. She could improve, but she knew the basics. I have never seen anyone swim in the lake bare myself. I stripped off the unnecessary clothes only left with underwear and jumped in. The water was cool over skin, soothing it somehow. Cyra swam over and began splashing me. And so began the splashing war which lasted much longer than expected. She would get some in my eyes, so I would make sure I would get some in hers, kicking the water like a mad woman. I glanced up and saw the unexpected. It was the deer. She was perking her ears and looking at us fool around in the water. Cyra gasped next to me. "It's a deer Katniss," I continued staring. What a beautiful creature. Her ears twitched at sounds, her nose sniffing the unfamiliar scents we brought. I swam to the edge, memorized by her beauty. "I've never seen a deer before." Cyra continued, swimming after me. I couldn't believe I had actually considered killing the deer. She was too gracious and wonderful to become food. I couldn't kill her.

I climbed out of the water and tried to keep calm so she wouldn't skip away. I walked to her, my hand out. She edged closer to me, her nose reaching out to my hand. We still had a few feet apart, but this was the closest I have ever been to an animal that was dead with an arrow sticking out of it. I smiled at her. "It's ok, everything is fine." I cooed, trying to coax her closer.

She took a step forward; I held my breath and stayed still.

2 steps,

3 steps,

I let a laugh escape, excited at the progress. An animal trusted me, the girl that killed all animals. I heard a swoosh of a noise coming from my left. I knew that noise all too well, that noise was a long lost friend finding its way back to me. I screamed at the deer, trying to make her run, but it was too late. The arrow pierced her left eye and escaped through the other side, just under the right one. In her right eye, I saw her die. The life faded out of her as she wobbled to the right and finally fell to ground. She made a piercing cry. It was a sound that ended all sounds, and most defiantly one you wouldn't forget.
I fell to my knees and screamed at nothing. What had just happened? Was everything that I cared for dying? I tried to find the reason of her death. In the far distance, behind all the trees I could just make out a silhouette, fogged by my tears. I could just make out the bow and arrow as the figure disappeared into the brush, out of sight forever.

Cyra talked to me all the way back to town, I couldn't think straight. Trust something like this to push me over the edge. I killed animals every day, but witnessing a death was different. A death of an innocent. It was a death that you hadn't planned, that you weren't ready for. I found Peeta inside the bakery. The counters were nearly installed and when I found him I cried and fell into his arms.

When had I become so weak?

Cyra explained what had happened. He tried to calm me down, but there was nothing to be done. I was gone. He picked me up and carried me through the town and to the house. People stared at me like I was an alien in his arms. I didn't care anymore. All I kept seeing was the arrow pierce the deer's eyes, just like Marvel speared Rue in the games.

I cried even harder.

He put me too bed and sat on the edge, pushing some of the hair out of my face. "I wish you would talk me about things." He said, leaning over and kissing me on the forehead. "I'll bring you something to eat later."

Then he was gone, back to the bakery I guessed. The thought of being stuck with my own thoughts scared me. I sat up and tried to stop the tears. Everyone's name passed through my head, everyone that had died. Finnick, Rue, Cinna, Primrose. These were just a handful of people that had died for me. For me! I had killed them all.

I went to the draw and dug out the pin. It felt heavy in my hand, the mockingjay stared me down. "Forgive me." I cried to the golden bird. I hoped everyone heard my plea, I hoped they heard how sorry I was. I led back down and closed the pin in my grip. This was the only thing I had to remember them all by.

I sat on the window ledge, the world outside turning dark ith every second that passed. A light rain had began to fall, making the world and my mind cloud over with nightmares. Nightmares were hard to escape, they were always there every time i closed my eyes. Their faces, swarming around me in the darkness. Faces that once held smiles, but now was grey and cold.

Finnicks cocky yet absolutely gorgeous smile, (though I wouldn't admit that) teasing me about sugar cubes.

Rue. Her brown eyes peaking at me through the trees, giving me hope in the dark night.

Cinna, the way he mimed 'Twirl for me' in the crowd.

Primrose. My loving sister. The saver of so many lives, her death all mine.

And I guess in a way I had killed Peeta. He wasn't the man he used to be before I came into his life. The most import thing I can recall him ever saying to me, the words that made my heart stop and listen. 'She doesn't know the effect she has on people.'

How would any of them forgive me? I was the damned. And I damned them all to death.

-Who do you think shot down the deer? How ill Katniss fix her heart and head from the games? The next chapter will be about Capital, excited? Leview me a review answering my questions and what you want to see happen next! I'm sorry if i don't update as much as i used too, college has started and i am shattered all the time, i will update a quickly as i can, but i wont rush anything as i want you to be happy with what i write :D(P.S. Don't forget to answer the poll on my profile!) Shunice x