Chapter 11
It had been weeks since Yuri was released thanks to Estelle's efforts, and now, he owed her his freedom. That was not something very pleasant to think about, but each passing day reminded Yuri that he should be grateful towards her, and that made him feel uneasy, to an extent that he didn't know how to behave when she was near anymore. On top of that, it was not as if he had somewhere to live since he had been expelled from his former dwelling because of his debts – debts that Estelle paid for him. So for the time being, he was staying at Estelle's place and it didn't help him to feel better when she was around... That was why he was trying his best to avoid her whenever he could, pretending to have some chore to do. And the chores, that was the least he could do to redeem. Estelle seemed to appreciate it a lot, but she obviously didn't understand that Yuri wasn't doing it out of kindness, for it was not his type to handle the housework willingly. Actually he was rather laid back and only cared about tidy or clean his place when it was becoming urgent to.
It didn't annoy Yuri to help her that way though, given that he would never be able to repay her.
And the time kept flowing little by little, with Yuri still being ill-at-ease with Estelle who wasn't aware of it and wanted them to be close friends. The idea sounded weird to Yuri, but she said it was necessary for them if they wanted to go on living together. He could perfectly remember the dinner when she told him that they should try to know each other better. That had been quite the scene.
On that night, Yuri was making a tasty rabbit stew with rice when she entered the kitchen with a nervous face. That was so unusual that he began to fear that she would tell him a bad news or something. He dried his hands and walked to her to see what was wrong and that's when she told him this with a serious look:
"Yuri, I think we'd better talk."
His heart started to beat madly. Why was she fidgeting and all?
"Y... yeah, what is it? Are you alright?"
"Well... actually, I've thought a lot about some things lately, about us to be more accurate..."
These words had been enough to make him become as white as a ghost within a second. Was he imagining things?
"Huh, what do you mean?" He said, his heartbeat becoming faster.
"Hmmm... you see, we've lived together for a few weeks now, and I like it very much, it's much nicer to have someone to talk to at home and all!" She blurted out, putting two hands on her rosy cheeks out of embarrassment.
"... Yeah, and so?" Yuri hazarded, not very sure if he wanted to hear more.
"And so, I was thinking about you and I having a friend therapy so that we could understand each other better!" She answered, dead serious. Yuri looked at her with bewildered eyes. "I... I mean... you're not easy to read! I don't even know what you think about me!" She added, lowering her eyes and nibbled her lip. Silence settled between them. Worried, she lifted her eyes again to look at Yuri who was staring at her with an undecipherable expression. "Wh... what?" She asked, starting to feel very awkward.
And Yuri burst out laughing. He was laughing so hard that tears began to appear in the corner of his eyes, and that his ribs hurt. Estelle watched him, uncomprehending what was happening.
"Why are you laughing?!" She asked genuinely.
It took Yuri several seconds to calm down and be able to utter a proper answer.
"Sorry! It's just that you looked so serious and all, I thought you'd have something bad to say, but a 'friend therapy'? Ha ha, that's too much!" He ended, starting to laugh again.
"... Did I say something funny?" She went on, entangling her fingers with nervousness.
Yuri stopped and looked at her. Was she really serious? No way!
"Eer... Estelle? Don't tell me you actually believe we need a therapy?!" Yuri said, now rather anxious than amused.
"But... I've read that there exists a therapy to understand your friends better, and I thought that it might be a good idea for us! You always seem so broody, but you never tell me what's going on, so I started to think that I didn't get you at all! That's why I..."
Yuri interrupted her.
"That's enough Estelle, I don't need to hear more. Honestly, look at me... do you think I would be one to go on a therapy?" He replied, questioning her with his gaze.
"Well, I... It's just that I've never been friend with a man before, so I don't know what to do..." She said, blushing.
Yuri laughed even harder.
"Sheesh, Estelle! You've made my day! Men wouldn't even think about a therapy! And frankly, we don't need that kind of stuff! I'm sorry if I made you worry, but I'm fine, really... and you've done nothing wrong, okay?" He said, trying to sound reassuring.
"Really? So, are we friends?" She inquired.
"Sure we are. You didn't need to ask." He answered.
He was relieved when she made her beautiful smile. At least, she believed him. Or rather, she believed in him. That's how he became aware that living with Estelle wasn't that bad after all, as she never thought ill of him or expected something in return of her hospitality. He even began to like her personality. They could get on well in the end, but Yuri couldn't forget how much he owed her.
After this event, things went smoother for them, yet it still could be awkward sometimes. However, the more the days passed by, the more Estelle wanted to be in Yuri's company, which didn't make his situation easier. It was as though his freshly acquired freedom belonged to her, and Yuri couldn't refuse her anything, as he was in her debt. But she was completely oblivious to that fact and only thought that he was staying with her and helping her because they were friends. Maybe being close to her hadn't been a good idea after all? Yuri feared the worst...
And as a matter of fact, the worst happened...
It was a Saturday afternoon, and Yuri was sweeping the house. Estelle was following him suit, talking and talking and talking, while Repede was yawning in his basket. Yuri brushed off one of his long locks behind his ear, and turned towards Estelle. She really seemed in a good mood, but he would soon get a headache if she kept talking like that.
"Hey, Estelle, what about you quit speaking and we sit on the doorstep to watch the snow falling?" He suggested to shut her up.
She nodded and went to sit on the entrance stair. So did Yuri, happy that she was quiet.
But that was not the smartest thing to do and it didn't take long before he noticed his mistake, as Estelle moved closer to him, letting her head rest on his shoulder.
Fuck. He should have seen it coming. He cursed himself for his carelessness. What to do now?
"Yuri?" She finally asked, closing her eyes.
"What is it?" He said, not sure that he should allow her to be that close.
"Do you remember when I said that I hadn't befriend with a man before I met you?"
"Yeah, why?"
"It's because I've always been a bit shy and that I mostly stayed with my family, so I used to hang out in fancy parties where I only spoke with young men from the high society, given my parent's status."
"This is sudden, why are you telling me that?"
"It's because... it's because I'm glad I met you, Yuri." She eventually said after a while.
"Huh, okay, but I didn't do anything..."
"You're wrong!" She nearly shouted, getting up.
Okay, so that's even worse than what I expected... Yuri thought.
"You're wrong, because you've taught me a lot during the last month... Maybe you didn't notice it, but my life has completely changed thanks to you." She explained.
You're right, I hadn't noticed it in the least...
"How come?" He asked, not-so-curious.
"Well, now I know everyone can change, and that I can be friend with men as well without being afraid of what people think. You see, my family values were, it is not right to speak with people from other backgrounds, especially with men, because you have to marry someone who has the same standards of living as you. I mean, it is not my family only, it's the whole aristocratic class... So I always followed what they told me, but, I've never questioned myself about what I truly wanted..."
"I see... but, why the sudden change? It's not as if you were some kind of scornful upper-class girl before I met you, you even took me in when I had nowhere to go, so I don't believe I made you change..."
"No, you didn't help me in that way... I've always been concerned by people's well being, even if they were not from the same social background as I..."
"Yeah, and so, what do I have to see with that?"
"So I know I've told you already that you were my first male friend, but..." She stopped.
Crap, don't say it...
"I had never been in love with a man before either..." She said looking straight at him.
Oh shit...
Yuri clicked his tongue in annoyance. Did she realize what she had just said?
But she went on.
"So obviously, I've never had a boyfriend..." Yuri remained silent, which made Estelle cringe a bit... She fidgeted and added: "What about you?"
What now? What could he possibly do? Even though she didn't say it aloud, she had just confessed that she held some feelings for him... He couldn't do as if he hadn't understood, but he couldn't tell her the truth, right? Or should he? She had been so nice to him, he couldn't lie to her now, mostly when he had promised to become better. However, he was sure of one thing: he couldn't return her her feelings. It was high time he spoke about himself then...
"I had. But that was not serious." He replied frankly.
Estelle raised an eyebrow.
"Oh? What was her name?" She asked with a smile.
Her?
"Why would you want to know something like that?"
"Oh hmm I guess I'm just curious about the type of girl you like!"
Thought so... Damn it...Guess I just have to tell her everything...
"Excuse me, but when did I say I loved a girl again?" He asked. She looked at him, jaw-dropping.
"But... Oh Yuri, don't tell me that by 'that was not serious', you meant she was just..." Estelle began with a kind of outraged expression.
That's when Yuri noticed his mistake. She actually didn't understand what he inferred...
"Huh? No Estelle, that's not what you think! Love is not the matter here, it's sex, I..." He was about to carry on his explanation, but Estelle turned crimson red, as if it was the first time she heard the word and she interrupted him.
"Ah! But that's not moral! Yuri, I didn't think you..." He cut her out, pissed that she wouldn't even listen to what he had to say:
"LET ME SPEAK! Damn it, don't go imagining things! What I meant is that you're mistaking about the sex, not about love!" He finally managed to say before Estelle's puzzled eyes. And then, there was the most awkward thing: a blank in the conversation. She was looking at him, but apparently, she still had troubles to understand what he implied. Yuri sighed heavily. He would have to enlighten her. "You don't make the things easy you know... I told you, I didn't have a girlfriend, but that doesn't mean that I didn't have a love affair..." He added. Now, he was worried about how she would take it... What if she rejected him once she would get what he said?
"EH?! Don't tell me that you weren't together because she was already with another man?!" Estelle shouted.
Yuri stared at her, exasperated. Indeed, he couldn't do any innuendo with her...
"No, that's not it. Geez, I thought you'd understand but... well... you see, I had a boyfriend. But our relationship didn't last. To tell the truth Estelle, I'm not interested in women..."
She looked at him, at a loss for words. Yuri averted his eyes, not knowing what her reaction would be. He was ashamed to confess such a thing, but he didn't want Estelle to have false expectations. She was worth to know the truth.
"You should have told me..." She uttered.
Yuri lifted his head. Did he hear well?
"What?" He said.
"You should have told me, because now... I feel horrible for what I told you... and also because... because..." She lowered her gaze. Yuri knew that the news pained her, but he was glad she didn't get mad at him. He stood up and embraced her.
"Shhh Estelle... don't say it..." He whispered, knowing fairly well that she loved him but that he could not be with her.
She grabbed his shirt tightly and began to cry. How he hated it. He didn't want to hurt Estelle, but he still did it, and it annoyed him to no end. He should have seen it coming though. They remained in this position for a while, then Estelle pulled apart.
"I'm fine... don't worry... I can understand..." She said. She looked at him and smiled. "Well, at least, we can be friends!" She exclaimed, regaining her usual joy, to Yuri's relief.
"Of course!" He replied.
"So! I'm still very curious! What's your ideal lover?" She asked.
She was amazing. Her change of mood was impressive, Yuri should learn that from her.
"Hmm, that's not an easy question... I guess I'd like him to be very different from me, it's no fun otherwise! Of course it can lead to arguments but I guess every pairing experiences these little inconveniences one day. What else... he shouldn't be lazy, because we'd be two lazy asses wasting our time on a sofa, watching TV all day long... Oh, and I like annoying people when they're busy, so it'd be funnier if he were a hard-worker, so that I could slip on his lap to distract him when he's sitting at a desk, working on important things! But above all, he should have short hair, seriously. I don't like long hair." He answered, folding his arms.
Estelle tilted her head on the right.
"But why do you wear long hair if you don't like it? Besides, it's beautiful!" She said.
Yuri remained mute. She was right, why did he have such a long hair already? It was so much of a pain in the neck sometimes, but he couldn't bring himself to cut it and he didn't remember having it short.
"Good question... I think it's because I've always had long hair that I don't want someone with the same feature... He replied.
"It suits you well! I wish my hair could be that pretty... Mine has split ends all the time, so I often have to cut it..." She said, twisting one of her pink strand.
"I've never had this kind of hair issue... It's not as if I cared about my hair though... I only brush it once it's clean, that's all..." He replied frankly.
"You're so lucky then! It could be even prettier if you cared about it a bit more! I'm sure it would look very silky if..." Yuri interrupted her.
"Before you say anything, I don't want to serve as your styling head, sorry!"
She seemed a bit disappointed, but Yuri didn't want her to touch his hair.
"But you'd have a magnificent hair if I..."
"Yeah, come on, add it pins and glitters, I'd be the prettiest of all!" He replied with irony, hoping that she would get the joke. She blinked twice.
"Yuri! You're not serious, are you?!" She squeezed, ready to go find pins and other hair accessories.
He stared at her with unbelief... This girl, he swore, was too naïve for her own good!
"No I'm not." He replied. The spark of hope glimmering in Estelle's eyes vanished.
"Oh... But still, it could have been funny!" She went on.
"Oh please, Estelle, stop it already!" He ordered. It was time he did something else. He stretched up and said: "Well, time to do some cooking. What do you want for dinner?"
She nodded and followed him inside. It had been a long afternoon, and a feeling of uneasiness wouldn't leave Yuri...Why did he think about Flynn when he mentioned his type of lover?
On another side, Flynn was on edge for the last few weeks, as he had to put an end to his investigation on Barbatos since the army and the Secret Intelligence Service were in charge of his case. It seemed to him that the police was considered as powerless and he hated it. At least, he could still protect the civilians, but something felt wrong. How was he supposed to help them when the police ignored everything about the advance of the military? But above all, he knew that the whole population – including himself – was deliberately kept in the dark about this threat not to spread fear, yet it was even more dangerous that way. People weren't cautious enough, Barbatos had killed lots of people before. Flynn tried to convince himself that it was the only thing that made him mad, however, he had the feeling that there was more to it. He wondered about the true reason behind the government sending the SIS and the army instead of the police. They were trying to hide something, that's for sure... He mentally swore, capping his pen back. He had enough pondering over this story, and it was time for him to take a little break. He stood up and went to the kitchen, he was a bit hungry. He opened the fridge and noticed it was empty. He sighed and closed it. His stomach was grumbling. How he missed Yuri's cooking... No, wait! He didn't miss anything coming from that jerk! He shook his head, trying to reject the thought. He perfectly and willingly lived alone before he had to watch over the other male to protect him from Zagi, so it didn't matter if he had to cook, right? Flynn needed to convince himself, but he refused to admit the truth: it was easier when he had someone at home to do the chores. He sighed and looked at the calendar. Christmas was coming soon. Very soon. He came to the window and opened the store a little. He noticed despite the darkness of the night that snow was falling again and that steam was already spread on the glass. It must be cold outside...He thought. All of a sudden, he saw a picture displayed on the glass screen. Unfathomable gray eyes were staring at him, piercing him. Flynn let the store fall on the reflection. Why was he haunted by this man?! He punched the wall before him in anger. He was a policeman, damn it, and it was not the first time he had to arrest someone! So why did he feel so guilty?! No matter how many times he would tell that to himself, the bitter feeling wouldn't leave. He exactly remembered the scene when he told Yuri to get out. The latter seemed so hurt, but it had not been enough for Flynn's resolve to waver. However, the aftermath was rather sour. First, Raven always reminded him of his "unfair" decision, and secondly, seeing Yuri at the school restaurant only added to his uneasiness. The more he tried to soothe his conscience, the less he succeeded. Had he been wrong? According to Raven, he had, since Yuri had already made up for his bad deeds. But still, there were laws and Flynn couldn't let it go so easily. Why everyone was against him? Even Estellise with whom he used to speak at the high school seemed to avoid him recently. He definitely felt alone, be it at the police station, at school or at the university. That's when Yuri's quote came back to his mind: "Carry on this way and you'll never make any friends. You'll end up all alone, in your world of laws, betrayal and useless justice." It gave him the chill. Could it be that Yuri had been right? Flynn didn't know what to think anymore. As if it wasn't enough, his work was really stressing him and he absolutely needed a break to calm himself down. Raven had suggested him to take some days off, maybe that wasn't a bad idea... He took his phone, and for the first time, he asked for a whole week of rest.
But had this been the smartest idea? Again, Flynn had huge doubts... Christmas atmosphere made him feel melancholic, and he wondered if he hadn't better go back to work to forget about his loneliness and boredom. For the umpteenth time in the day, he sighed and switched on the TV to switch it off a minute later. Completely idle, he went to his bedroom and flopped down on the mattress. He raised his head a bit to look at the snapshot on his end table.
"Hi mom..." He mumbled. He knew that anyone entering would find him pathetic, but right now, he didn't care. He was alone anyway and he often greeted his mother's snapshot, as if she was still there. He wished he could talk to her and tell her how bad he felt, but life had not been kind enough to let her live.
What's happening to me... I've always wanted to make things change so that honest people could live peacefully day after day... I dedicated myself to achieve this purpose by becoming a policeman and kept upgrading but... What if the path I've chosen was misleading? What if my judgment was biased and that the things I deemed right actually weren't? Am I truly that egoist?
Flynn grabbed his hair in despair, curling up on his bed. He had no one to rely on... Suddenly, his phone buzzed. It was just another stupid Christmas ad by his phone operator. He hated it because it kept reminding him that he would be alone for that day of happiness, with no one to give a present to. He felt miserable, but mostly horrible. Yuri was right, he had been selfish and refused to listen to him because he thought law prevailed upon everything. He had a proof here that law didn't always bring joy. After all, what good did it bring to him to put Yuri in jail? None. And did Yuri harm anyone since he broke out from jail? Not at all, quite the contrary. Why, why, why couldn't he think about anything else?! He inwardly knew the answer: it felt comfortable to have Yuri at home. Even though he had bad habits like being messy and offhand, he wasn't of a bad company. At least, he was clever and cooked well. He could even be funny at times, but Flynn didn't let him know his mind since Yuri was just supposed to be a nuisance he had to bear with before arresting him. However Flynn couldn't have foreseen a negative outcome such as his current situation. That was the last straw! A policeman having second thoughts banging up a delinquent?! Pitiful but real. Nonetheless, it was not as if Flynn wanted to apologize. Yuri wouldn't buy it anyway, and Flynn could perfectly understand why. Also, his pride was on the line and he couldn't afford to tell Yuri how he truly felt. He rolled on his back and looked at the ceiling.
Guess I just have to take my responsibilities and stop complaining. I'll just have to think twice next time.
This thought helped to ease him a bit and he finally fell asleep. He wished he wouldn't wake up for Christmas.
"Yuri! Where are you, Yuri?" Estelle shouted from the first floor.
He came running, worried. He looked at her from downstairs.
"I'm here! What's happening?!" He asked.
"I can't find my earring and I must leave in less than five minutes! Please, help me!" She said, in a desperate way.
Oh... That's right... She's doing Christmas Eve at her cousin's...
"Okay. Did you look in your pocket?" He asked, nonchalantly.
She seemed surprised but hurried to slip her hand in the pocket of her coat.
"Yuri, how did you..." She began.
"Because I know you well. You're always doing too many things at the time when you're excited and I'm doing the washing, so I must be cautious with your clothes. Most of the time you forget things inside your pockets, that's why I thought your earring could be there as well." He replied.
She looked at him, amazed.
"Thank you! I could have searched for it for hours if you hadn't told me where it was!" She stated. "Are you sure it's okay for you to stay here tonight while I'm gone?" She added, tangling her fingers.
"Don't worry about me. It's not the first time I spend Christmas Eve alone. And besides, I have Repede with me, so you can go at ease." Yuri answered.
"But still, I told you already that you could come with me... I don't understand why you refused." She said, grabbing her handbag.
"I don't know your cousins or your friends, and as they live in the capital, I wouldn't have the money to buy an airline ticket. And before you tell me anything, I won't let you pay for me again. I know you were to suggest it." He said rapidly, as she opened her mouth to protest.
"Fine! But you would have been welcome... Anyway, it's too late now, I will miss the flight if I don't leave right away! See you soon Yuri!" She replied and kissed him on the cheek before departing hastily. No sooner had she closed the entrance door than she came back in the room and added:
"Oh! I almost forgot! There is a surprise for you under the Christmas tree! Promise me you will open it at midnight only!"
Yuri opened his eyes wide.
"No way! I don't deserve it... and I'm not the patient type you know? The wait is gonna be unbearable!" He said, with a childish pout. Estelle smiled.
"Still, you have to promise you will wait before opening it!" She insisted.
"Yeah, yeah... But you'll have to do the same then." Yuri said. She looked at him with wonder.
"Eh?" She asked.
"You'll just have to open your handbag and see what happens. Early merry Christmas Estelle. Now go!" He replied, gently pushing her outside. She would definitely be late at this rate.
"Oh, thank you Yuri! Early merry Christmas to you too! I'm off! Bye!" She exclaimed with rosy cheeks and a delighted expression before dashing to her car, waving her hand at Yuri who stayed on the threshold. She was soon out of view, and the long haired man entered the house again, closing the door to the winter cold.
He waited for a while, his back leaning against the door, listening to his surroundings. Everything had become silent, except for the dog's snoring. Yuri looked at the clock.
7:12 pm... that's just perfect.
He went to his bedroom and took a few stuffs before leaving the place. He would be off as well tonight.
Great, now I just have to climb the stairs in the dark and I'm nearly done... Come on stupid door, be nice and let me do my job... I'll get rid of your lock in less than a second, so please, stay quiet...
Although there was no light, he stealthily began to pick the lock with a small hairpin – one which Estelle wanted to put in his hair –, as he used to do when he was still at the capital. It wasn't his first time breaking into someone's home and he was glad his skill hadn't turned rusty. He finally managed to unlock the door quite silently, benefiting from the fact that the TV sound drowned out the door's.
Yuri peered inside, ever so discreetly. The whole entrance hallway was pitch dark, but he could see the TV's screen light from the living room. His target was there... He just had to sneak into the room and the trick would work fine. That would be a heck of a surprise.
He continued his way across the corridor, accessing the very place he wanted. Once there, it was him who was surprised when he found no one inside.
What? He thought, looking around him. A shiver ran down his spine. What if his target had sensed his presence and was ready to assault him already? He turned around quickly, to make sure he was alone. Now wasn't the time to get startled. He regained his composure and decided to proceed with his research. That's how he noticed the light coming from below the bedroom's door. He came closer and listened.
There was no single sound. Yuri focused more, closing his eyes, but there were still no sign of life inside. Puzzled, he looked through the lock hole. What he saw made him forgot the purpose of his visit.
Indeed, Flynn was there. But not as Yuri expected, for he was knelt next to his bed, his head buried in his arms on the mattress. What's wrong with him? Yuri thought, trying to see more. And then, he spotted an open tiny medicine box. No way?! Don't tell me that's barbiturate! All of a sudden, Yuri's body acted on his own, and he entered thee room without a warning, grabbing the box. It was completely empty, but it truly was barbiturate. In a low dose, it served at a sedative, but in overdose, you might not wake up at all! Yuri grabbed Flynn by the shoulders and turned him round, to see his face. The latter's eyes were half closed and Yuri took fear. He slapped him in the face once, and twice.
"Come on! Wake up! Just spit that crap already!" He shouted, worried.
Flynn got no reaction for a second, then he jump, opening his eyes wide. He got up and pushed Yuri away with strength.
"You! What are you doing here?!" He asked, not very stable on his legs.
Eer... He seems rather full of life for someone who has just swallowed an entire tube of barbiturate...
"Weren't you trying to commit a suicide?!" Yuri answered with a question.
The silence settled for a while and Flynn was pulling such a weird face, Yuri didn't know what to think.
"Hm hello! I asked you something! That'd be nice if you could reply!" He added, unsure.
"Don't you think that should be my line?! But seriously, a suicide?!" Flynn answered, with the same ambiguous face.
"Eer... well, I... you ate those, right?" Yuri said, showing the box.
"Yeah, why do you ask?" Flynn questioned, not understanding Yuri's anxiety.
The latter opened his mouth, and closed it, at a loss for words.
"Go throw it up already, you silly! You'll fall in a coma or worse with so much quantity!" He ordered, taking Flynn's wrist to drag him out of the room.
"Fall in a coma or worse? So much quantity?!" Flynn whispered, following the long haired man. He stopped all of a sudden, finally understanding. "But what are you thinking?! I'm not stupid enough to eat the whole tube!" He exclaimed, withdrawing his arm from Yuri's grasp.
Yuri turned round, dumbfounded. Wait, had he mistaken? Oh crap...
"Eer... you mean, that's normal if the box was empty?!" He asked.
Flynn stared at him, in disbelief... Then, a smirk began to appear on his lips, and soon, he was laughing so hard that Yuri pouted, outraged.
"Ahahahah! Don't tell me you're actually thinking that I swallowed all the pills tonight?!" He asked, very amused by Yuri's imagination.
"Sorry for trying to save you!" Yuri replied, cross.
"Saving me?! You break into my home again, for God knows which reason, and then, you come to rescue me because you saw the sleeping pills tube was empty and assumed that I tried to end my life?! That's too much!" Flynn added, still laughing.
"That's not funny at all!" Yuri roared, losing his temper. He had really made a fool of himself, and he clenched his fist, ready to hit the blond if he kept mocking him.
Flynn stopped and everything about his expression changed. He was back to his serious self and glared at Yuri.
"Is that what you're looking for?" He asked with a dark undertone, displaying Yuri's switchblade under his nose.
Yuri couldn't believe it. He searched for his weapon which he had tied at his belt, and noticed it wasn't there anymore. How could Flynn have been so fast to snatch it without him noticing it?!
"So, why have you come? Don't tell me it's because you wanted to be the perfect Santa Claus." He said with a menacing tone and a cold gaze.
Yuri was stunned. To tell the truth, he didn't intend to use the weapon at all. How could he explain now?
"That's not what you think! I didn't come here to murder you, otherwise, I would have let you in your bedroom, since I thought you'd die with all the barbiturate!" He tried to object.
Flynn raised an eyebrow, not really convinced.
"I swear I wasn't about to use it on you. I just take it with me wherever I go, as a deterrent. It's a bad habit of mine since I've lived in a dangerous quarter." Yuri added with honesty.
"That does not tell me why you came here by night, picking the lock." Flynn said, folding his arms, still keeping the weapon.
Yuri hesitated a moment and clicked his tongue in annoyance.
"Wanna know why? I just thought I'd come to startle you a bit and settle our matters once and for all. I didn't forget what you did to me, and I wanted to understand why you enjoyed it so much. So now, I'm listening. What did it change to your career? Did you get any benefit from arresting me? I bet you were praised everywhere. Must be pleasant. But tell me one thing... Why didn't you arrest Barbatos then? You'd have become a hero, and besides, I think he's a bit more dangerous than me. So, why don't you keep arresting all the villains of this world?" Yuri asked, with dark eyes.
"Shut up!" Flynn only said, to Yuri's surprise.
"Oh? So I'm not getting the 'I must ensure the law' and 'you're a delinquent' speech? What's happening to you, Flynn?" Yuri went on.
"SHUT UP!" Flynn yelled. He didn't want to hear a word more. He had that on his mind already. He didn't need Yuri to remind him. "Just shut up... I don't want to speak about this anymore!" He said, with a shaky voice.
"Why? Don't pretend it's nothing, because if it hadn't been for Estelle, I'd have stayed 3 weeks more in a filthy jail, and you can be sure that I'd have killed you already. I just promised her that I wouldn't do anything wrong since she has been kind enough to release me." Yuri said, dead serious.
"I know, I know! Listen, you've served your due sentence, so I don't have a say. However, if you've come for unjustified revenge, then you'll give me no choice but to retaliate." Flynn replied.
"Nope. As I said, I just came to see which effects my detention had on you. I was curious." Yuri explained, hoping that Flynn didn't get any satisfaction from it in the end. It'd teach him a lesson. He couldn't have known that he was not far from the truth. Indeed, Flynn averted his eyes. The blond's patience was running out, and he was so filled with remorse that he was about to let the cat out of the bag.
"Would you mind leaving me alone? It's Christmas today, let's call it a truce." He suggested, very tired. He didn't want to deal with Yuri anymore, for seeing his cold gaze gave him a glimpse of the anger and pain he caused him.
"Tss, it's not Christmas yet, we still have time to talk. Past midnight however, I might even be able to forgive you, depending on the answer you'll give me. After all, we're both working in a religious high school, it'd be a blasphemy if we didn't respect Christmas as a pardon day!" Yuri said haughtily. He was glad he had the upper-hand in this argument.
Flynn however became even more uneasy. It was the first time someone was lecturing him in such a way, and it was worse than everything he had ever experienced. The feeling of guilt was horrible!
"Fine! You want to hear the truth?! Since I've arrested you, Raven and everyone knowing you remind me that I acted bad! They keep harping on it or ignoring me! Mostly Estelle, she hardly says hi to me now! But you know what was worst? It was to see you at the school restaurant. I just couldn't look at you straight anymore, because I feared to see all the suffering I put you through. I'm just a coward, unable to do his job properly without regretting it later! Talk about a policeman! And I'm not finished yet, there's more to it! I can't even sleep at night, because those eyes of yours keep haunting my mind! You looked so pained when I told you to leave, I couldn't bear the idea that I was able to hurt someone that much! So now, I'm reduced to eating sleeping pills every day to rest a bit! That's why the box was empty! Happy now?!" Flynn finally said, looking at the ground.
Yuri opened his eyes wide. Did he hear well? It was weird, he looked so different from his usual self: he seemed much more sensitive and less egoist. But it was something Yuri had seen before. Just like when he protected him from Zagi, or when Flynn was talking with other people. He was actually nice when he was not too serious.
"That was unexpected. But you know what? I hope it serves you right. From now on, you will start thinking by yourself rather than following orders without questioning them. I can't say I am happy you did me all this, because obviously, I'm not, but I am glad I made you realize that life isn't just black and white. If all the cops and justice men could understand that, then the people would feel much relieved and everything would be better. You're not a monster just because you refuse to abide by the rules for something you deem necessary. However, you're just a stupid monster if you refuse to acknowledge that sometimes, it is necessary to refuse to obey. I want you to think about it. You're not a monster Flynn, I know that, because you're trying hard to help people, so try not to become one." Yuri said, before turning round.
His words echoed in Flynn's mind. It made sense, yes, it was perfectly logical. How couldn't he realize it earlier? He was so ashamed. Yuri had just given him a much needed lesson of humility. How could someone like him find the right words? Flynn would have never guessed that someone like Yuri was able to put him in his place in such a diplomatic way.
"Wait!" He shouted, noticing that Yuri was ready to take his leave. The latter didn't reply and only turned his face, showing that he was listening. "Don't you hate me? Don't you want to take your revenge? I'd totally understand..." He added.
"Don't get me wrong. I didn't tell you that I didn't hate you. But I hope I wouldn't have to revenge, now that you understand what living means. It's all about deciding. Just make sure to make the right choice next time. I'm off. Merry Christmas, Flynn." He waved a hand at him, and left the place, as silently as he entered.
Flynn fell on his knees, dumfounded. He would never have thought.
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Yeah, merry Christmas to you readers as well! What, we're in summer?! Yeah, I know XD I'm just missing winter's cold air!
So, I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I did! It was utterly funny and deep. Yuri's reflection was quite interesting, don't you think?
See you soon!